everyone always talks about the fp aspect of borderline and how intense it can be to love someone in such an extreme way,
but i never see anyone talk about the other way around, when you so so so desperately want to love someone. to care about them, even a little bit, but you just can’t.
bpd only lets you have two extremes, and you’ll have people that try their best around you; that want to be with you and enjoy your company and love you, and you see that, but they just don’t have the same, intense grip on your heart that overwhelms you, sickens you. in fact, it’s hard to really feel anything at all for them, no matter how hard you try.
the funniest part is that, at least for me, this always happens to the good, kindhearted people, whilst my actual fp’s are almost always people that are toxic or extremely bad for my mental health. like some kind of sick joke.