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@uniquenerdpeace
Anuja Mistry's answer: What's intimate or private for women is not really decided by women, alarming isn't it? They are often told what they are supposed to do, expect, & even feel! Women have had their bodily autonomy snatched from them let alone their voice. The belief that women are somethings...
Anuja Mistry's answer: Besides consent being thrown out of the window, don’t you think winning women over at the cost of stalking & harassment has been quite decoratively romanticized in our society? Since forever, women have been portrayed as naive, obedient, delicate, and highly objectified tr...
Anuja Mistry's answer: Hold my ice cream tub, while I say it out through the poem. She asked if it’s hard, I said,"Yes." She asked if it’s painful, I said,"Yes." She asked whether it is worth it, And I said, "No!" Yes, it is annoying; yes, it is exhausting; It does get on my every nerve, But no,...
This is what my periods are like to me, how is it for you?
What do you think about free bleeding?
When yet another pair of underwear is butchered by Bloody Mary, all the past mental breakdowns make sense!
Yep, I am talking about periods! It’s no surprise that during period days we, menstruators, are a bit sensitive. And in our defense, it is the hormones, Science proves it! These 5 days for some of us are chaotic & messy AF! Those who manage to be flawless during these times…don't know how you do it, but you are amazing! Cause from PMS to mind-numbing cramps is an absolute horror. Till the time we manage to figure it out, the after-effects of constantly wearing plastic pads edge us further!
Don’t you think just because some are intrigued by the little blood we ooze out for the sake of humanity, we shouldn’t silence our pain? Yuh-huh, the moment I read about Kiran Gandhi running the marathon while bleeding free, I realized how simple and liberating it is. Well, agreed free bleeding might not be for everyone, also sacrificing pants every day for some would not be feasible. While reading about it more with a beat mind, Eureka! I discovered something called period underwear! Now, I know most of you might have known about it but I just found out- thanks to all the hoax hush about varied menstrual products! Without wasting any time, I searched for period underwear and grabbed Lemme Be’s Z Drip. And finally, my world stopped spilling away!
What more do you want on a bad period day? Some assurance, smooth yet sturdy comfort, coziness…and maybe ICE CREAM?!
The PMS, cramps, sore breasts, and backache are still a pain in the uterus but at least post-period, there isn't anything to haunt me! I am glad I chose to trust the fantastic four-layered period underwear. Sometimes, instead of suffering, we should just try to converse about our struggles as menstruators.
Cause menstruation has been there since forever, but has been talked openly almost never! Let us all prioritize our menstrual health & hygiene and get a grip, And choose green sustainability to absorb the drip!
Anuja Mistry's answer: Ever since menarche menstruators are always alert, cause no one knows when the uterus might decide to flood its gates. This uncertainty of it can be tenfold frustrating and difficult to handle, especially when you are diagnosed with cancer. Dealing with the treatment knowin...
Changes in the body during menopause & chemo are unpredictable and during such a sensitive phase, we need to be there to support them and provide extra care. What’s most important is boosting their self-esteem, to help them understand that they are strong & amazing.
Female Genital Mutilation
In the name of shame or to avoid some other blame, women have always been devoid of autonomy on their bodies while others make these decisions for them. Let's talk about Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) out loud. This commonly cited reason for the outdated & harmful social norm is practiced to moderate or restrain the sexual experiences & desires of girls/women. So what exactly is Clitoridectomy or Genital mutilation in females? It is a complete or partial removal of girls’/women’s - between the ages of infancy to 15 or sometimes more- clitoris, labia, or narrowing of the vaginal opening for non-medical reasons. There are four types of FGM depending on the part of genitalia that is being removed. Often motivated by unquestioned beliefs about “acceptable social behavior to ensure premarital virginity & marital fidelity”. Some also associate FGM with notions like cleansing or beautifying women using removing the body parts that are considered unclean, unfeminine, or male. Sometimes medically, but mostly by non-medical methods, FGM is practiced by the elder women of particular communities with a sharp blade & without any anesthesia, exposing them to severe health risks. Even if they heal after a week or two, the trauma they’ve been through scars them for life. In the longer run, girls/women might often suffer from sexual problems or might also be a huge risk during childbirth. Despite WHO & UN condemning these practices and terming them as violations of human & child rights, they are still widely practiced. Why? To avoid being an outcast or enemy of the community they belong to. Many survivors have managed to pull themselves out of the darkness & are contributing their bit in exterminating the generational trauma. One thing that can be understood is even though people know it's harmful they continue to follow the unarguable tradition. A sustained conversation focusing on the elimination of FGM & the idea that female sexual experience is not evil, or unclean, is necessary to truly free girls/women & empower them to reclaim their human rights and autonomy.
By Anuja Mistry from @lemmebegirls
What’s your period plan for 2022?
Since menarche, it begun The annoying era of menstruation; Don’t get me wrong, I know its importance as a human But how we deal with its pain is known by no one, The sticky rashes, the itchy patches Not to mention those bumpy scratches, Thanks to plastic we have got it all, While mother nature keeps taking the fall. Now that the heaps of garbage have formed an island, Wondering if someone had helped me enlighten; Is there a way to stop it? Is there a solution to drop it? Turns out there is a path through it, A simple, safe, and sustainable option so, why not adopt it? Cottony soft & organic period care, Along with the menstrual cup, disc, & period underwear When all available everywhere, Why would you need to be in despair? When you can save the greens for sure, Why suffer the pain and endure? This is what I’m gonna do, Smash the myths and make it through! The colors of eco-friendly sustainability are on my palette, What’s your plan of doing your part to save our planet?
-Anuja @lemmebegirls
*Me trying out shorts and a crop top in the trial room. Wait, I can’t get it anymore. *Mirror: Why? It’s so cute! *Wait. Woah did you just talk? *Mirror: Yeah. *Talkin- you are- oh okay, totally not weird. *Mirror: It’s just in your head so just listen. *Umm ok *Mirror: You should post a cute picture in these on your stories! *But my thighs & the stretch marks look weird! *Mirror: Girl, you have a great fashion sense, who cares about stretch marks, every body type is perfect & you are so beautiful! *Really? *Mirror: Yes, have you heard about Fa(t)shion February? Nope… Mirror: Then go & check it! Hon, all the body types are wonderful. These misconceptions are just in your mind! You humans have been running on the trend-mill for far too long now, rummaging & secretly hoping to fit in the typical Small-Medium-Large. You have always had reservations when it comes to fashion. If there is any party, wedding, or any event that includes going out in a space with lots of people you turn into this dedicated chipmunk trying to run the wheel & get into shape just to fit in THAT FIT! Even if it means making yourselves go through all the struggles. You aren’t just harming your bodies but also hammering down your confidence & self-esteem. No matter where you go, you will always find body shammers who’d always have something negative to say; in the end, making you feel pathetic about yourself. Don’t let these negativities get the best of you. It’s your body & your choice, so just rock it the way you like! Fa(t)shion is not just any term it's a statement creating an uproar against those rusty standards & redefining the way people embrace themselves. Not just about curvy it's about every body type, some can be skinny, chubby, some can be a little bit of both! Lemme tell you there’s no such thing as fitting in! What is perfect anyway, isn't it different for everyone? Then why let others define your perfection? As long as you are comfortable & you love the way you are. You are unique & gorgeous in your own way, so don't let anybody tell you otherwise!
-By Anuja from @lemmebegirls
Sssshhh...Drip, Drop, Spill!!! (Masturbation during Menstruation)
Ohh…Aaaahhhhh…AAAaaahhhhh!!!
Ohhh myyy goddd…!!!
*Dog: Oh dear god sounds like someone’s killing her in there!
*Cat: But she is alone in there…
*awkward silence *
*Exhausted me coming out of the bedroom *
I swear uterus you better stop with the cramps or else I am abandoning you!
*Dog: Of course, she is on period, she is talking to her uterus.
*Cat: Yep, she has finally lost it AGAIN!
Huh?! Wait…what were you guys thinking?
TBH I kinda think about it too…after all, it's one of the medically recommended ways to deal with cramps, do you know what it is?
*Cat: umm…are we supposed to answer?
*Dog: shusshhh just nod
Masturbating!!!
It’s not just me you know, most of the people who are comfortable do it! Cause, almost everyone at least sometimes feels the urge for some literal self-love during periods. The fact about it is menstruation is actually a really good time for masturbation!
Uh-huh, you heard it right, it is the BEST stress reliever that helps in getting rid of these nasty cramps. Masturbation increases the feel-good neurotransmitters serotonin and dopamine associated with pleasure and reduces stress. When you orgasm, the body releases hormones prolactin and oxytocin that helps in sleeping like a log…
*Cat: but you sleep like that everyday…
*Dog: shut your whiskers!
…not to mention it’s a natural pain reliever! And you know what the best part is besides feeling great you also get to safely pleasure yourself because of the natural lubrication provided by menses. The reason for this horny feeling as per experts is because the libido might seem stronger due to higher levels of testosterone tingling through the body. And come on you deserve some solo time to explore and love yourself more! Since I am going through a lot I am gonna let some of the juices drip, drop, & slip today!
*Both: Go ahead & drop it down, don't be shy hun go bonanza, it's your body & your choice so be your own romancer!
By Anuja Mistry from @lemmebegirls
If you tell me that you followed and actually were able to complete your new year resolutions Imma say you lie! Why? Cause if you do you must be an angel out of this world. New year resolutions are meant to be forgotten…okay that’s a lame excuse. But that is exactly what happens, no matter if you are someone who remembers what happened, where to whom, how a decade ago; when it comes to remembering and religiously following new year resolutions your memory gets shorter than that of goldfish. Hey, if you are gonna shout at me for my laziness…in my defense it's WINTER! Besides no one wants to write in the journal that I was working at 11:50 pm on the 31st and got to know it's 2022 after hearing the firecrackers! Once I was so determined to follow my resolution of going on a diet I swear I tried to eat salad but it's not my fault that it comes with a pizza! Woh har new years pe extravagant new years’ resolutions banana jaroori hai kya? Can’t our resolutions be as simple as looking out for ourselves, taking it slow, stopping multitasking, and being kind? Oh also drinking more water…(not a good idea in this chilly weather though). Despite complaining about not being consistent about my resolutions, it always feels exciting to look forward to something new, in the coming year. Cause even though we love the layers, we always wait for the snowflakes to wither and reveal the beautiful bloom of the mango tree. Yeah, my 2021 started off with a really bumpy start but hey, so what I wasn’t able to do the things I planned I still have next year, right! 2022 be ready, here I come with a whole bunch of enthusiasm, loads of determination, passion, sprinkles of excitement, and a gist of positive vibes and kindness! This year I WILL BE dedicated to my new year's resolutions! First stop, working out every day! * First morning of the new year * Dumbbells: Yeah… it's 11 am and she is still knocked out… By Anuja Mistry from @lemmebegirls
A letter to Mamma: Story of every woman during menopause
Hey Mom, I have something to confess, NO it's not about yesterday’s last piece of cake. It’s about you! Lately, we have been arguing a lot, whether it's a serious topic like making life decisions or silliest one like which underwear I should put on (seriously?!) We have been snapping at each other quite a lot. The sudden change in your behavior throws me off guard every day. You are sweet as sugar, cool as a cucumber for sometime but the next second you are on a rampage. Even when we have a normal conversation out of nowhere you start crying & then argue about the most random thing. After thinking about it, I want to apologize for a million things, one of them is not being there for you like you were there for me during my menarche. What’s astonishing is it took you just a look at my face to understand that my hormones were popping out like popcorns, but it took me so long to realize when yours were doing the same. Despite all your emotional rollercoasters, not once did you make us feel unprotected, uncared for, alone, or unloved. You always had time to listen & cater to our tantrums. But when it was our turn to reciprocate we were so indulged in our lives that we weren't there for you in person, leaving you behind fighting your battles alone. Sorry won’t suffice but I want to make it right. This is not just a confession it is a letter to welcome your menstrual revolution & celebrate your menopause. It’s time for you to unplug your individual self from the Mummy life & enjoy it the way you want. I want our mother-daughter relationship to turn into an adult-to-adult relationship where we can be friends, cause we know us better. Let’s share, laugh, cry, cook, workout, & chill together, because for all the 25 years of my freckled life you have been there through my every new emotion ignoring yours. Now it's time for you to be selfish & let me be your support while you embark on the journey of realizing yourself & knowing that there is a life beyond all this. This stage in your life is not a fullstop, it is just a comma, its a menopause. P.S. The culprit of cake is your other kid!
Don’t you think women have a love-hate relationship with public toilets? No matter how much we complain and get disgusted, we keep running back to it. It's like a toxic relationship with have with the public toilets, despite trying getting out of it we are getting dragged down even further for a long time. Well, taking a leak outside is not an option for us, because of several causes like UTIs, bladder cystitis, etc. we have to deal with stinky, unclean, overflooded, and disgusting toilets most of the time. But people with specific impairments face a lot of problems. People in wheelchairs often find it difficult to rush to a next toilet when in need. Surprisingly, even some of the bigger institutes just include disabled toilets for namesake. Either the architecture is quite poor compared to the architecture made for the people without an impairment, there are improper or poorly sanitized water-flush bowl, no toilet papers, or even water! And if you are a menstruator, it gets even worse. Sometimes, the toilet stall is so poorly engineered that there isn't enough space to move around. Many times people prefer controlling themselves just to avoid the traumatizing experience which may further lead to severe problems. We have gotten so used to unsanitary washrooms that opening a door at finding a clean toilet is almost like a surprise! Hygiene management and sanitation are the most essential yet highly ignored. For how long are we supposed to compromise on our health and keep flushing the challenges with excuses? It’s hightime that we educate and make people aware of refusing to make such sacrifices and prioritize the cleanliness and hygiene. It needs to be understood and internalized that having access to a decent & sanitary toilet is a necessity and not a privilege! -Anuja, intern @lemmebegirls
Aren’t we all different & impaired in someway? Then why do we have the tendency to label the differently abled people as different or impaired? From improper social constructs to architectural structures we have indirectly been consciously oblivious & forcing those around us to recognize themselves as disabled. If we consider persons with impairments as disabled don't you think that makes us TAB or Temporarily Abled Bodied? Cause impairment or so-called “disability” is inevitable. At some point in life anyone can face an unfortunate event or may face difficulties due to old age. Disability is a cultural & social construct that people face with a myriad of social realities. These social realities force people & categorize them as ‘Abled & Disabled’. The association of the so-called ‘disability’ with theological & liturgical realities in concepts such as sin, divine retribution, metaphorical language, often alienate persons with impairments & their families. This instills the feelings of being “less than” their temporarily abled-bodied humans. All the problems that are existent today continue to root stronger because of the wide communication gap provoked by social & cultural stigma attached with the term disability. Unknowingly, we often either maintain our distance or unintentionally put people with impairments in the spotlight, making them feel more helpless when they are trying to blend in. Because at least that would make them seem normal. But what is this "normal"? Why do we have this need to bracket everyone socially? Why can’t we just exist in an inclusive society without being forced to feel in a particular way? We need more awareness, more communication to unlearn such stigmas & terms. We need to be open, considerate & more sensible to eliminate the social barriers that tend to demotivate & create a question of security, pride, & dignity. By using our abilities we should support our fellow humans & uproot the hollow prejudices of insecure societies! -Anuja, intern @just.lemmebe
While discussing the movies Kabir Singh & Haseena Dilruba with my friend, I talked about how they have become common, but she said, “yes, they are common. Common things have problems.” It hit me hard. Indeed, violence against women has been occurring for so long that it has become “common”! The cultured society preaches its gendered restrictions through unhindered exposure of media. The internalization of such toxic ideas about love, relationships, & monogamy that are often deeply rooted in misogyny & violence is practiced in real life as they are in the media. Unknowingly, ending up being the motivator or even justification of violence against women. Films & art are powerful mediums, they educate & impact several social norms. The makers need to think about the repercussions of their concepts from various perspectives. Many who defend such movies should understand that the choices of every individual are influenced by the society & culture they have grown up in. Women can make choices that can be influenced by patriarchal & misogynistic upbringing. There are a lot of women who continue to stay in violent marriages due to insurmountable socio-economic barriers that don’t allow them to seek divorce or leave abusive households. There is a constant fear of being ostracized & living a life of society-made shame. The problem is media in some movies doesn’t only depict violence but glorifies, normalizes, & makes it look acceptable because it is done in the name of love! My question is, if All is fair in love, is violence and domestic abuse too? The making & popularity of such movies shows that media especially, the film industry. Despite several movies portraying women empowerment continues to be plagued by dated & disturbing tropes. Holding filmmakers accountable & calling out the normalization & commonization of such violence & abuse against women on-screen, regardless of how it is packaged or justified, is necessary to uproot & pierce through the thick-skinned sexism & misogyny. -Anuja, intern @lemmebegirls
Whether I tell you I wanna spend the night out Or just want to drink and hangout, Just wanna relax so don't mind me with judgments or doubts. Wearing a short dress or wearing long one Both are my choice to be comfortable and have fun, Just embracing myself & not asking for your opinion. Going out with a friend, without thinking about gender Dancing, singing, drinking making memories to remember Just trying to socialize & be human, not trynna entice any offender. Yet somehow I am sexualized, To the point, I lose my confidence and accused Muffled under the disgusting views, Strangling my hope with demonic abuse. My “No”, my “Not Interested”, my “Annoyed” and scared Silence, None of it is my consent! Either too terrified to say it Or still contemplating to commit, IT’S NOT A YES UNTIL I SAY IT! By Anuja Mistry intern @lemmebegirls
Thanks to my mother’s ‘period talk’, I had a prior idea about periods. After stumbling while wearing pad, I handled it pretty well! Despite knowing about periods & how to wear sanitary pads, it would have been great to know about the shadowed parts of menstruation. Like, why boys & girls are separated during menstrual lessons? Why is it so stigmatized to opely talk about it even at home? Why do we HAVE to miss out on our favorite outdoor activity or festivities? Why are pads tagged as sanitary pads instead of menstrual pads? Is it compulsory to stick to just one period product? Why do we need to wrap & hide the pads in newspaper while buying? Do only women bleed? What is gender inclusive menstruation? What are menstrual diseases? These can’t be ignored anymore. Menstruation is a natural & most essential phenomenon. It occurs during the age when we are most curious & anxious about what’s happening inside our body. Understanding the reasons behind it & the importance of maintaing hygiene is very well addressed but the worn out pages of myths, taboos & stigma are still left unturned. Although we have the same uterus it ovaryacts differently. Cramps, soreness, tiredness, mood swings, etc. are legit and tend to affect our menstrual health. That's why we have to track what we consume and how we maintain our health during our entire cycle. Uterus loves to keep us on edge with a different surprise every day. You either bleed nothing or you bleed A LOT! With the constant change in your body there is a growing confusion of what is happening. And this can only be resolved by openly asking & sharing our experiences with each other. To relive our panicked ovaries by knowing we are not alone! Let's discard patriarchal restrictions by conversing about menstruation. By Anuja, intern @lemmebegirls
Being obedient, being polite, Respecting elders without questioning their might. Wait can I atleast know the reason? NO you have no right! But its my life shouldn’t I atleast get to decide? Their conditioned complexes arise, Furious eyebrows can no longer suffice The amount of anger pent up inside. Showers of Parampara, Pratishtha & Anushasan Have washed away many dreams, happiness and aspirations. Too weak to move, too muffled to choose, But with absolutely nothing to loose I am gonna question the forbidden rules. To fight for my thoughts Without letting society rain on my shot, I will do everything I want. No more sacrificing my will, No more compromising on what I want to fulfill! If prioritizing myself is gonna make me a rebel I’d be glad to burn the stereotypical diyas by voicing my opinions. For a positive change in this negative society We need a dhamaka, So society brace yourself cause from now on, I am going to be the Patakha! By Anuja, intern @lemmebegirls