end/phoenix

this is my minecraft blog. to keep shit tidy. he/it

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HELLO IT IS I UNSUCCESSFULEND FROM MINECRAFT!! YES THAT'S ME!!

you may know me differently depending on where we met but most know me as phoenix or end, either one works!! my pronouns are he/it :)) the servers i play are typically just CatCraft but i am also on @aimseytv 's server for their community and i have my own private server, prawn sparklefeet <3 the ip of which i will not reveal

ABOUT MY SERVERS/CHARACTERS/LORE

(note: ALL of my ocs are transmasculine even if i dont use those specific words in the story. they're also all likely arospec and acespec, assume they're aromantic and asexual unless proven otherwise :D)

CatCraft: i don't actually have an established character/lore here, but my forming idea is a scientist and i uave various skins for experiments he has done ! i also like leaning into the witch lore hehe

prawn: this is my origins server, originally my character was an axolotl king residing in an ocean palace (ocean monument) and my origin was elder guardian but im changing to enderian and will thus have different lore !

aimsub: still workshopping it but think arcane archivist :)) like derivakat's Records of the SMP album and jayvik in the acceleration rune/hexcore space.. those kinda vibes..

all my skins can be found on skindex via demigoddex !!

my tags (so far):

#aimsub lore

#catcraft lore

#origins lore

#not lore

#catcraft

#aimsub smp

#prawn sparklefeet

#UnsuccessfulEnd

[transgender-png]

my discord status after probably an hour of talking to my friend on minecraft

[transgender-png]

most minecraft mobs will be sooo angry about being pushed into a hole like a cat being shoved into a bathtub. but villagers see a hole and theyre like is anyone gonna fall into that? and don't wait for an answer. where there's a hole there's a goal and the goal is to fall into it.

[pikachulink1123]

thinking about hope for an endless sunset

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20 likes and i finally change my pfp on skindex .

[transgender-png]

starting a notes game cuz why not. (maybe it'll motivate me to do some of this shit lol)

gonna keep the goals relatively low i hope but like more expensive for things that take more energy

5 notes - drink an entire glass of water

10 notes - trim my cat's nails

15 notes - brush my teeth

20 notes - wash my hair

25 notes - wash my face n try to clean up my beard cuz it looks kinda scraggly rn

30 notes - ill take a proper good shower (more than just the bare minimum to stay clean, i rly struggle w this lol)

35 notes - deal with my goddamn emails oughh

40 notes - workout on the elliptical for 15 mins (if i cant get to it ill just take a walk instead)

45 notes - ill put a sheet on my bed and maybe try to fix the frame so my mattress isnt sliding off all the time

50 notes - fold up my clothes and (try to) put them away in my drawers

55 notes - upload all my current skins ive been sitting on to skindex

60 notes - work on maybe 2, probably just 1 skintober prompt

65 notes - ill finish my script for a video im working on

70 notes - i will try to fix my obs shit

75 notes - record the gameplay for aforementioned video

80 notes - make thumbnails for the aimsub smp videos

85 notes - ill get down a first draft for one of my short fic ideas (or as much as i can of one)

90 notes - ill work on actually uploading those aimsub smp videos,,,

95 notes - ill try to clean up my art supplies

100 notes - clean up the coffee table n couch

105 notes - clean up my laptop files......

110 notes - clean up my shop on catcraft (rly need to do that) and refresh trades n shit

115 notes - fix my storage on there as well and get those damn barrels off my lawn,,,,

120 notes - work on my pngtuber to start streaming on twitch(? or maybe youtube?? both??)

125 notes - watch some videos from my watch later playlist on youtube. it's a mess. it's so bad i have another playlist bc i reached the max number of videos in the youtube default watch later playlist..,,,,

130 notes - add my friends' music reccs to a playlist and actually listen to them

135 notes - seriously think abt my halloween costume

140 notes - watch a halloween movie like ive been meaning to. no phone or anything to work on, no distractions, just actually fully watching the movie

145 notes - set up my socials for content creation. idk if im gonna have anything rn but youtube and twitch but maybe a bluesky or smth too? but regardless i need a proper, constant pfp and shit to use mine r outdated and dont match across platforms

150 notes - stream on twitch. idk what or when but ill just. try one little stream playing some minecraft, if my laptop can handle it

200 notes - make a serious real big effort to clean up my room,, maybe just pick up the trash or try to fix up the placement of things

500 notes - (big stretch bc i rly dont wanna do this lol) ill attempt to open up to someone abt my addiction . (not gonna say what it is, tho im not like into any sort of substances i will say, but i recognized in like 2022 that i had an addiction to smth and have been struggling to deal with it since then, and i havent rly told anyone abt it, so. maybe opening up will help,, tho im not sure if i can even tell ppl What it is bc it's rly like. shameful and awkward and idk if my friends would be comfortable hearing abt it. but ill try)

1000 notes - ill do a silly dance and post the video on here

i dont expect to hit a lot of these, maybe just like. 30 notes max. my posts afaik dont rly blow up (with like one or two exceptions being my 'high-functioning' nd post and maybe my mspec to aspec pipeline post) but i figure it's worth a shot?? bc idk. i need to get this stuff done and maybe having some form of accountability will help. maybe ill even like post some proof or smth of each goal to encourage myself idk. (gonna rb this on my mc blog as well for the mc/content related goals but im not counting my own notes on this post)

[jasperrwrites]

to the people that look at my tumblr profile and see the back-to-back-to-back reposts of sunshipduo, ignore those. that was a moment of weakness.

[transgender-png]

tw: (implied) character death

i made this short fic based on c!guqqie's crash and c!aimsey burying her a while ago but never shared it rly anywhere. reblogs appreciated as id rly like aimsey to see this lol but im aware they likely never will

I have spent my whole life looking back. At places, at people, at memories. Not once have I actually looked around. I never took the time to appreciate what I already have. I’m too busy thinking about what I’ve lost. I reminisce on events that haven’t ended yet. I mourn people who are standing right next to me. I miss places I haven’t even left. All I do is look back at my life while I run away from it.

I never wanted to hurt her. I didn’t want to hurt anyone… I just don’t know how to love them while they’re with me.

She was my sun, my moon, and my stars. She was the entire night sky, twinkling and infinite. She was the daisies in the fields we ran through. She was the beat in my heart, the wind in my sails, the smile on my face. She was everything to me. She was always there for me, even when I wasn’t there for her; she waited for me. Now, I’m the one who’s waiting for her. But she’s not coming back. She’s never going home. 

She is never coming home.

The sky is bright and blue, the sun is shining, and puffy white clouds move lazily above our heads. It’s a beautiful day. It’s a cruel day. 

How dare the flowers bloom when she isn’t here to smell them? How dare the sun shine when she isn’t here to feel it? How dare the world be so beautiful when she isn’t here to see it? 

How dare life go on when she isn’t here to live it?

I grab a shovel and stab the ground. The dirt is soft, it’s not hard to move. Soon enough I have a hole 6 feet deep, the perfect size for her body. I don’t know if I should give her a casket. I decided not to - she would feel more comfortable among the flowers.

She always loved the flowers.

I drag her lifeless form to the hole and set her down as gently as I can. She looks so peaceful, almost as if she was asleep. I’ve cleaned the cuts and scrapes on her face and limbs. You know, being an alien, I thought maybe she would bleed green. Or even purple, or blue. Maybe she wouldn’t even have blood.

She bled red. She was more human than I ever was. She’s more human than I could ever hope to be.

Her spaceship is ruined. I tried to fix it, but it was no use. It was utterly destroyed. I still remember how she looked when I found her, slumped over in her seat. She had cuts and bruises all over, and bits of rubble and metal crowded her. It was surprisingly easy dragging her out; she isn’t very heavy. 

She had never looked so tragically beautiful. I had never loved her more than I did in that moment. I had never wanted to hear her voice more. I have never missed someone as much as I miss her now.

I almost can’t bring myself to bury her. I don’t want to admit that she’s gone. I want to hold her close to me and never let go. I want to crawl into the dirt with her and stay there forever. I want to let our bodies decay together and let the earth reclaim us both.

Maybe in a couple hundred years, archeologists would dig up our bodies and discover our skeletons intertwined, and they would know how much we loved each other. How much I loved her.

I throw all the dirt in by hand. It hurts at first, scooping it up every time, and my hands are cold; but after a while, my hands go numb. I take the time to pat it all down flat and line the edges with the prettiest rocks I can find. She deserves only the best.

I make sure to collect plenty of flowers. Especially pink tulips. Those were her favourites. I plant them in the center of the grave, making a heart shape with my finger in the dirt. When I’m done, I put a sign at the top. “Rest in peace Guqqie. I hope you found a home with me.”

I hope it was quick. I hope she wasn’t scared. I hope she didn’t know it was going to crash. I hope she knew just how much I loved her. I hope she still loved me.

By the time I’m done, the sun is hanging just above the horizon. I always liked sunsets. We used to watch them together. I wish I could watch the sun go down with her, one last time. I sigh and sit next to her grave. I’ll watch it for both of us… I think she would like that. After all… I never waste a pretty sunset.

You can come home to me when you’re ready. I left the gate unlocked for you.

‘Til then I’m sending out smoke signals, hoping that I’ll see yours, too.

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THE AIMSTESTER STATUE

ITS DONE!! i didnt have froglights but i made due!! ty to goose and nox for donating shulker shells n boxes <3

im so unbelievably proud hehe i did it all in one day too!!! WAHOO

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aimsey haters see a silly little guy anf go "is anyone gonna make that problematic" and dont wait for an answer

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#aimseys like if that meme of a dog with a propeller hat was a person

taking this out of the tags actually

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SHES DONE!! DO WE LOVE HIM!! I SURE DO!! YAAAAAY

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so i have the full material list for this.. gonna attempt to build it before the test server shuts down. (coloured just to reduce eye strain hopefully)

purple concrete powder x126 white wool x114 purple concrete x73 blackstone x64white concrete powder x64 light grey concrete x57 purpur block x56 stripped pale oak wood x44 andesite x32 shulker box x32 polished deepslate x30 grey concrete powder x28 white concrete x27 grey concrete x26 amethyst block x23 black wool x22 string x22 purple shulker box x20 grey wool x18 smooth quartz block x18 chiseled deepslate x16 blue terracotta x15 iron block 12 yellow concrete x10 coal block x8 pearlescent froglight x8 purple carpet x8 tuff bricks x8 yellow carpet x8 yellow wool x8 cherry wood x7 chiseled tuff x6 yellow concrete powder x6 light blue concrete x5 yellow terracotta x4 black concrete x3 blue concrete x2 glowstone x2 lime concrete x2 orange concrete x2 purple wool x2 red concrete x2 snow nlock x2 brown concrete x1 pink concrete x1

if you are on the server and wanna donate.. sob..

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SHES DONE!! DO WE LOVE HIM!! I SURE DO!! YAAAAAY

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updated aimstester skin on skindex :3

https://www.minecraftskins.com/skin/23528058/aimstester--aimsub-smp--redo-/

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working on editing (trimming) and uploading some vids while i wait for the server to go down. it's like doing paperwork while you wait for the world to end

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void and maraalbee, yall were epic <3 idk if either of them has tumblr but i took pics for em

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final screenie <3

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last day :( sadge