One look at you and heaven's on fire

Vale, 28

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Los dias que no estas Barbie REcanati + Paula Trama Para Darte

Feeling very nostalgic but allowing myself to feel the nostalgia

Los días que no estás no puedo parar de pensar en qué andás

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You ran away to find something to sayI went astray to make it okayAnd he made it easy, darling.

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Pequeños detalles

Todo es malo hasta cuando te pasan cosas que te cambian un poco la visión negativa de todo.

Hoy me levanté y al ver a mi mamá, me llamó y me dijo que me había comprado algo. Resulta que se dio el tiempo de comprarnos a mi hermano y a mi colets porque ambos tenemos el pelo largo y siempre necesitamos amarrarnos el pelo. Pensó en mi mientras andaba por ahí y nos trajo algo con cariño. 

Por otra parte, Luke, meses después de vernos, me comparte una canción de Miles Davis and tells me he remembers that time he was coming back to our place in Lawson and noticed I had ABC jazz playing on the TV. I usually play jazz when I’m by myself, that time wasn’t the exception. I like jazz in the background when I’m in the mood. He didn’t know this and never mentioned the jazz that day but remembered months later. Nobody else would notice something like that <3 

Ways to make me feel loved and appreciated 

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Sometimes things don’t stay stuck forever

I did it!! I did-it, how I wanted it, who I wanted to do it with and it was very nice. 

I had such a great time that the memories come to my mind and it sometimes feels unreal. 

We did it :)

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Si te volvieras, vuélvete a mi.

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Mini

Nunca se me había muerto una mascota y con casi 14 años era muy probable que no ibas a vivir mucho tiempo más. Sin embargo, me siento culpable y responsable porque no me di cuenta que algo te pasaba hasta cuando fue demasiado demasiado tarde. Verte con dolor y en el estado en que te vi me parte el corazón y prometo nunca más dejar que una mascota a mi cuidado pase por eso. Los perritos tienen el alma más pura que cualquier ser humano y espero que en algun momento me puedas perdonar por no haber hecho más. 

Si algo existe más allá de nuestros cuerpos vivos o muertos, espero que hayas podido ir a ver a la Tamy a su cama y que hayas recibido todos los cariños que en todos estos años sin ella no te pudieron llegar. 

Traté, te juro que traté pero no fue suficiente y pudo haber sido más. 

Lo siento mucho Mini, fuiste una perrita bacán y no pude darte el mejor de los finales pero voy a aprender de esto y prometo que no volverá a pasar. 

[fraoula-me-psyxologika]

hey, remember me?

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yeah I’ve been doing this for way too long, trying to fix it all 

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I'm high, high, high, no one's got me quite like you 🎶

I was just reading through our texts, the comedy was gold. Probably one of the things I liked the most about you.

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The Radio Dept. - I Wanted You To Feel The Same

By The Radio Dept. from the "Pet Grief " Album.

It breaks my heart to say that when I was in pain I wanted you to feel the same But nothing gets you really It's a shame I can't believe you didn't feel a thing

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This exact time two years ago

He probably never kept record of this day but I did, I always do. 

I remember what happened, how nervous I was and how, in spite of being long distance, special I felt. 

I even remember the “I’m thinking of you and what happened yesterday” text I got whilst I was at Anita’s birthday celebration the “next day”. 

I should have known that even though that nice feeling felt like it was gonna last forever, it never does. Forever isn’t for everyone. 

[cartagenacatalina]

verano en la sombra

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La Dorito y yo 💕💕💕

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First love and dog 😔

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Hoy me puse un poco emo.

Por primera vez desde que dejaste de hablarme que te extraño. Conseguí algo importante hoy y no poder compartirlo contigo me puso un poco triste/vacía. Tampoco ayudó mucho haber escuchado la palabra water en tu acento.

En fin, it's just another day

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I did it

I had my first therapy session, on probably the hottest day of the year, I was SO NERVOUS before I got there like I was about to be given a terrible diagnosis, like he was going to say he didn’t have anything to say that could help me, luckily it wasn’t the case at all. 

My psychologist is called Rodrigo (like my pseudo ex and Gael Garcia’s character in Mozart in the jungle). I chose him because he seemed like a nice dedicated guy and his patients left good reviews on his page. I also liked the fact that he works for the public health system apart from his private practice office because I’m privileged enough to pay for my therapy but many people aren't’. 

When he opened the door I immediately noticed that he was good looking and very welcoming. He treated me like an equal and he wasn’t too formal which is good, I appreciate that. We are probably about the same age, by his id number I can tell that he’s maybe 28 o 29? 

The only time I felt embarrassed to talk about something was when he asked me if I had a partner. I said “not really”, my partner history is so lame that it gets really uncomfortable to talk about it, then I explained my “current situation” briefly, we might have to touch on that some other time. 

He was very assertive and very nice, he figured me out quite well and yeah, my phrase was “Things that people find difficult are easy for me but things that are easy for most people are extremely difficult for me” so it’s clear that i have developed some aspects of my life very well but there are others that I just haven’t dealt with well enough. There are a lot of insecurities that I have to overcome and a lot of work to do but as he said when i admitted that I was scared of getting depression or panic attacks if I didn’t pay attention to my issues “ So you ARE smart, don’t worry you’re on time” 

Also, happy 27th birthday, Vale. 

You deserve to be happy with yourself and people who love you and appreciate you  

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I Never Said I Was Deep - Jarvis Cocker

From 'Further Complications'

I never said I was deep, but I am profoundly shallow  My lack of knowledge is vast, and my horizons are narrow  I never said I was big, I never said that I was clever  And if you're waitin' to find what's goin' on in my mind  You could be waitin' forever, forever and ever 

WOW

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I’ve taken the first step

I’ve been feeling stuck, frustrated and simply shit for quite a while now and although talking to friends and people in my life helps, it doesn’t solve any of my issues (I appreciate the time but after a while i go back to feeling the same way again). I have decided I am going to see an actual therapist and i’ve also booked an appointment, a day before my 27th birthday. I hope this is just me going through a tough time and not a major disorder but I guess I’ll just have to wait and see. 

Al final de cuentas, Dory ha estado conmigo mientras lloro en las noches y a pesar de que es una perrita que no entiende que las mentes de las personas son probablemente muy complejas, ella me da su apoyo y cariño. 

I think i’m going through a breakup as well (or at least I should because that complicated long distance relationship with an emotionally unavailable guy is definitely not good for me. I think I don’t choose the right men for me and I’m scared that will become a tendency) 

I plan to write about the progress I (hopefully) do on here 

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Everything makes so much sense now