obx4 spoilers ahead (where i’ve been)
well, the obx 4 ending has awoken me from my grave, as a lot of you may know i disappeared over a year ago and proceeded not to update you guys because everything i was going through. i had heard and saw rumors about this ending, but i truly never thought they’d do this to our beautiful boy. i know he said he got everything he wanted, but he’s never ever been at peace. i got attached to his character in april of 2020 when i was going through a harsh breakup and to say the least he healed me.
he brought the spark, now the spark of outer banks is gone to me. he was one of the original pogues, he brought so much light to my eyes when he appears on my screen for the first time. i wish i could go back to that day and experience it again. a lot of people may think this is dramatic, but he was my comfort, ive rewatched outerbanks countless times just for him alone.
i don’t know what to say or do, but i turned to here because i know no one will understand where i’m coming from except for all of you. i’m in utter shock and complete denial, and watching the show through again will always give me this gnawing reminder that he’s gone, and he’s not coming back.
also! the buried him ALONE in morocco, WHY WOULD U DO THAT. he should’ve been buried close to poguelandia or even next to his mother. his worst fear was being alone, and for the writers to do that is fucking beyond me. then to have rafe dig his grave, and the weren’t even close it doesn’t make sense. though i do still love rafe and have enjoyed watching his character development it’s just the truth
anyway, i’ll leave it at that because if i continue
i’m now 21 years old, no longer 19, and i feel all of the growing pains.
when i left you guys at the time i was supposed to be starting college, i still have NOT started LMAO.
i am still not doing well mentally and this ending just did not help.
i am currently in a relationship, but idk how much longer HONESTLY.
where this account stands
i don’t have the heart to right now more than ever, i may come back around to it, but i have to get use to him being gone.
writing for him won’t be the same because the imagine of him passing will always be in the back of my head.
i’ll update further soon.