Everytime I look at the stars at night I think about my pastā¦.itās interesting how the universe makes you remember all that means the most to you in lifeā¦I guess because it makes me feel so small..makes me value what I have. My tiny, fragile life.
When I was little I loved going to visit my grandparents at their holiday houses in two small and very different villages outside Moscow. Dadās parents had a house in a village called Baharevo which is about a 5 hour drive from Moscow. My mums parents had their house in a different, more modern village called Bronitsi. There I used to catch frogs and tadpoles and pick raspberries of grandmaās garden. She had a beautiful garden full of fresh growing vegetables, fruit and flowers.
She always let me make salads and help her in the garden and in the kitchen. My grandad built the house pretty much himself. So much work was put into that beautiful house. So much love and patienceā¦
Everytime Iād go and visit my dadās parents I will look forward to running around in the huge golden fields, collecting wild flowers for my grandmother and going to pick mushrooms with my dad in the forest.
My brother, my grandmother and I would stay up really late playing cards till 2am and we would tell each other stories. I would recite poems that I knew off by heart and listen to my grandma sing amazing songsā¦those songs stuck with me to this day.
Memories are so valuable.
Memories shape you into a person that you are. My memories are so vivid and so warm that it just kills me inside that I canāt re-live them. My childhood was so beautifulā¦so fun and pleasant. I canāt believe I wanted to grow up so fast..to now lose all that I once had.
Yesā¦I gained new memories and new experiences but the time of my childhood was the brightest, most dearest time of my life, because that time I had all my family around me and I didnt need anything else. Ive lost almost all my grandparents now and these beautiful memories that Iām talking about have crawled back into my life now to haunt me and to rub into my face that I no longer have that which I valued the most.
The only way to understand the true value of anything, is to lose it.