VelociJaster

My name is Jas. I live in Colorado. I do some things some times. You can talk to me if you like.

[bruno-has-definitely-deactivate]

[velocijaster]

*bonk*

[velocijaster]

"Tiktok has destroyed attention spans"

-people who created tldr

[velocijaster]

Bark. Bark Bark Bark. Bark. Funkin bark.

[toastbutteregg]

[velocijaster]

My brain only does this if someone is rubbing my back

[anxietyproblem]

[zero-two-ten]

this site has one setting

[jenroses]

I’m laughing, but there’s a super useful corollary, which my husband calls “the Red Balloon.” He was a defense lawyer and had a fair number of drug addicts come through, and there is a thing where if you’re like, on your first offense, they’ll do a thing where you can go to treatment and if you complete it they’ll take the conviction off your record.  And he would tell his clients, “Look, everyone’s going to tell you not to do drugs. They’re going to say it over and over again. And it’s like, if people tell you not to think of a white elephant, you’re going to think of a white elephant. But the trick to not thinking about a white elephant is to think of a red balloon. So you need to find your red balloon. For some people it’s yoga. For others it’s woodworking. For some people it’s scrapbooking or gardening or any of a long list of things to do. They focus on that, it’s a lot easier to succeed in ignoring the white elephant.” So yeah, “watch yourself” is one thing… but the better idea is to watch something else. (Even if it’s fanfic about werewolves fucking.)

It’s a form of productive dissociation, and is super, super helpful. It’s easy for me to get bogged down in how much pain I’m in… but some of the most painful periods of my life have also been the most productive, writing-wise, because writing is one of my red balloons. 

[kittydorkling]

There is a phrase I use A LOT in my parenting and my son gets very sick of it, but it’s true:

The thing you practise is the thing you get good at.

You may not intentionally be practicing “being grumpy” but if you don’t put effort into practicing “not being grumpy” then I’m afraid that’s what you’re doing. It’s hard! It’s really hard! Sometimes, for some things, it’s pretty much impossible and that sucks!

But being carefully aware that you are going to get good at the things you do most of is a good way to be more careful of what those things are. If that makes sense.

[bogleech]

You gotta appreciate sometimes how tumblr works in such a way that everyone who wants to reblog this interesting or useful psychological advice is also forced to reblog the thing about werewolf fucking

[velocijaster]

I reblogged it for the werewolf fucking. Them read the long, good advice later.

[velocijaster]

Look at my cat. Hims name is Atari.

[velocijaster]

[velocijaster]

Look at my cat. Hims name is Atari.

[velocijaster]

If you see this, it's your sign to watch my very normal husband on twitch at twitch.tv/possumgmr

But do NOT fall in love with him or there will be a very normal amount of hands.

[velocijaster]

Magic soup.

[velocijaster]

30 isn't too old to learn how to skateboard!!!

[velocijaster]

Shit. Nevermind.

[velocijaster]

30 isn't too old to learn how to skateboard!!!

[velocijaster]

Let me grow fat and old, please. please.

[velocijaster]

IT is really death by 1,000 paper cuts.

[velocijaster]

Since spending money is now a form of speech and cannot be infringed upon, it is an infringement of my free speech to say I can't spend money on an abortion.

Fair is fair.

[velocijaster]

Are you punk or are you smart?

[velocijaster]

I didn't really eat for the last two days. Then the first substantial thing I ate was Taco Bell. I think not eating was a better choice.

[velocijaster]

List of reasons why users are mad at me:

1) I'm here on time and not early.

2) I'm not here late. (Not allowed overtime).

3) I don't know their password.

4) I can only help one person at a time.

5) I can only be on the phone with one person at a time.

6) I do not know what their job is.

7) I am not the guy who was here before me.

8) I am not the two guys who were here before me and it is my fault they went from 4 techs to 3.

9) I cannot read their mind. (They have to put in a ticket).

10) The client wants to talk to them and not me because it is more secure and I am a middle man.

11) I have to take a lunch away from my desk.

12) I cannot train them on something I've never done and do not have access to because it is NOT. MY. JOB.