If you prick us, do we not bleed? @ventilaccion - Tumblr Blog

Some bad things;

estranged from family

turned down from almost certain job, maybe bad reference

Some good things;

vacation, travelling away

relationship

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I woke from a dream in which I was crying. Crying because my mother had left me.

I woke with tears, from a dream in which I'd been crying

I woke with tears, because I'd dreamt, and in my dream I wept for my mother, who had left me

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I'd dreamt that she forgave me, I dreamt that she was ill.

In my dream she forgave me, in another she was ill.

In one dream forgiving me, in another she fell ill.

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not liking a piece of music. liking the music. music is culture

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I regret -

What? Choosing this line of work? Being alone? Not doing anything with your life?

I regret not ending my life fifteen years ago.

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Through great suffering, great art

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I think of the book I read, and travel back to that era in my life, the same feeling filling my chest, as if I was truly fifteen again

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But how can I leave you, after all this? How could I forget you?

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A little patch of grass, overgrown, and a forlorn turret, almost fallen to the ground. And around - small, blue flowers.

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只要有一点希望的火苗，就要马上踩灭

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Feeling nothing, then starting to hurt again. And understanding why feeling nothing at all is a blessing.

Feeling nothing is better than being hurt.

Feeling numb is better than hurting.

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I was so jealous of this person I had just met, who was so unfortunate and yet laughing, who was in poor health but had the support of a loyal friend, who was so poor and loosing more but in good spirits. And I wondered if he'd won in life compared to me.

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If you do not love somebody, why would you do that? Methodically, analysing, moving in closer by a decided formula.

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