total trash mammal

no thoughts just DC (sorry not sorry)

[venusofthhardsell]

My gender, everyone

[venusofthhardsell]

Keeping everything on brand 😌✨

[just-themys]

The kind of shitpost I come up with at 1AM is me thinking "Hey, what's with telekinesists and this specific hairstyle :"

And I started to joke that the hair blocked brainwaves and that exposed forehead = more telekinesis.

But then I noticed

He slicks his hair back after regaining his powers.

And then:

Bangs = no telekinesis

Forehead = lots of telekinesis

And then ppl replied with the one and only:

So conclusion:

If you have telekinesis, expose your forehead for maximum effectiveness.

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk

[picsthatmakeyougohmm]

space jam dvd  space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd space jam dvd

[noir-renard]

[catchymemes]

[a-squirrel-wizard]

In honor of pride month I suggest wizards polymorph homophobes into gay frogs

[politijohn]

Source

Happy Pride Month!

[reasonsforhope]

Holy shit!!!!!!! HUNGARY DID IT!!!!

-via the Los Angeles Blade, June 1, 2026

[nostalgic-teddyy]

Imagine the level of whimsy I could reach if I just had $5M in my bank account rn

[luckyladylily]

You know those jumbles of letters? Those are called "words". They represent "meaning". Now the tricky thing about words is you need to read all of them to understand what a person is saying - sometimes entire sentences or, God forbid, paragraphs!

But I believe in you! I believe if you try hard enough and take it slow, you can manage to read all the words in a post *before* replying to it!

[plothooksinc]

#can't believe op wants God to forbid the use of paragraphs smh

[bumblebeebats]

Why is it that every time I google something like "Are olives poisonous to cats" the top results are always like "Fun fact: Cats are carnivores! This means that they eat meat. There is no reason to include olives in a cat's diet. You should feed your cat cat food, which is dry or wet food especially designed for cats. You can purchase this at a store." like is there a single person alive on the planet who's googled "Are blueberry muffins safe for cats" because they're planning on switching their cat to a muffin-only diet??? No, I'm asking because the little bastard somehow popped open the packet while I was putting away the groceries and dragged one under the couch before I could react and now I need to know if I should call the after-hours vet. "Cats should not eat spaghetti." NO SHIT, SHERLOCK!!!! "Try to keep human food away from cats." i live in a studio apartment with a completely silent and permanently hungry apex predator who has the intelligence of a toddler and the desperate Machiavellian cunning of a creature who spent his formative months on the streets. He can already open doors and he is this 👌 close to learning how to open the microwave. He is stronger than me and covered in knives. So im gonna do my best but for the moment i just need you to tell me whether this yoghurt is going to kill my son y/n

[spectralhauntings]

I've been using the pet poison hotline's poison list cause it has a search function. It also tells you whether something is mildly, moderately, or severely toxic which can be very handy! It doesn't contain like everything but it might be a good place to start, it also includes plants for fellow houseplant lovers <3

Explore Pet Poison Helpline®s vast knowledge on poisons by reviewing our pet poison list. Explore our top 10 poison and holiday poison lists

[littlemousling]

For plants specifically, there’s also a wildly detailed set of posts and listings about toxicity on the old, wonderful, Plants Are the Strangest People blog

[maxknightley]

"it would be so good if it was good" will haunt you but "it's extremely good, except for the one or two parts which are so bad it's genuinely kind of insulting" will straight up drive you insane

[maxknightley]

one has you making posts like "okay but if the author UNDERSTOOD the POLITICAL IMPLICATIONS of the story they were telling, and leaned into it, it would actually be a really interesting exploration of..."

the other has you pacing your bedroom at one in the morning going "why. why would you ever in a million years do it like that. genuinely what possible thought process was involved. was the writer possessed by a fucking ghost or something."

[maviyenot]

[chewedcorn]

Map of the US by a truck driver who has seen most of it…

[54viruses]

This is DEFINITELY someone I call an expert.

[drtanner]

I’m desperate to know who Gary is. So I can also avoid him.

[ruffboi-mags]

*WHEEZING*

Gary, Indiana is a city. XD

[theamazincactus]

These guys...

Bonus:

[ratbastarddotfuck]

you have to forgive the printer because it's one of the most machine-ass machines we interact with on a day to day basis. that thing says kerchunk. hardly anything says kerchunk these days. you can't get mad at her when she kerchunks up a little.

[digitalsymbiote]

Crazy that tech has gotten so bad that we're doing printer forgiveness now

[wawtman]

Alyiara Drow Priestess of Lust.

[tboy-cock]

being trans is awesome ill be like "hey someone was transphobic to me on reddit" and someone else will be like "then get off reddit" and im like "well theyre also transphobic to me on tumblr" and they're like "well thats because youre on tumblr" and ill say "well people are transphobic on instagram and twitter" and people are like "yeah twitter and instagram are cesspits" and its like. i think you guys are missing the point that trans people should not be forced out of any space due to violent rhetoric and threats about who we are and yet its happening all the time. and yall seem to think thats just how it is and it shouldnt be

[tboy-cock]

one of the reblogged tags has inspired me. yes, this is also about places that aren't accepting to trans people, im thinking of the south specifically. i left the south and moved out west, and we love it here, but we miss the south all the time. i lived my whole life in tennessee and i miss it all the time. i think about it all the time. and people will be like "but evan tennessee is a bad place to be trans" and it is. it is a bad place to be trans. but its my HOME. i grew up there, i lived my whole life until last year there, i have so many memories there. and im happy out here and its def more my speed out here but i would love the option to go back if i ever wanted to. and loads of trans people never leave tennessee or the south in general because its their home. trans people shouldnt be constantly forced and encouraged to move hundreds and thousands of miles away from the places they grew up and love because its unsafe to be trans there, it should simply be safe to be trans there

[were--ralph]

tumblr is the funniest social media site to go viral on

[were--ralph]

on tiktok people will quit their jobs after going viral once but on here not only can any post get 50k notes, but if it does theres nothing you can do with it. theres no monetization or any transferable skills at all. you just made a funny post and people liked it and thats the start and end of your career

[were--ralph]

you could say "i left the stove on" with no context and it might break containment on here and people start tagging it with ships and kins and theres no way to delete it forever unless staff gets involved. your mistake will never go away but your claim to fame will instantly

[were--ralph]

its like yes im the pineapple werewolf guy but no one outside of here and like 5 posts on reddit will ever know what that sentence means. i could jump on tiktok and no one would know me. no one on youtube or facebook. this is my little corner of the internet and i will die here before i give up that title and when i do know i lost nothing in the process

[were--ralph]

exactly