can you talk about managing people + dealing with politics, especially in the workplace? i'm a software engineer hoping to segue into management - intj, but have been thrust into leadership roles for so long and earned others' respect b/c no one can do well as i can. but personally, doing well means micromanaging + worrying extensively etc etc, which is positively exhausting for my mental health. i would appreciate any advice you can give.
For INTJs (applicable to ISTJs), micromanagement is a common issue because you’re overachievers who tend to excel and fly up the ranks at the junior level until hitting a brick wall at the leadership level when you need to switch gears, learn to play nice, and rely on other people. The underlying logic behind this behavior is straightforward:
“I’m amazing at what I do, I don’t trust you to be as good as me, but I can’t do everything myself so to ensure the absolute best outcome I need to keep a tight grip on everything and everyone so no one screws up.”
Hitting objective goals and managing your own work is easy (similar for ExTJs) because you’re only responsible yourself– but managing other people who can be flaky, unpredictable, and mistake-prone is a challenge. The root cause of micromanagement is lack of trust in your team, a couple ways to mitigate this include:
Be a mentor, not a manager, and empower your team by teaching them how to become better. Most people don’t come perfectly pre-packaged with all the information, technical skills, people skills, organizational skills, work habits, and stamina to succeed– they need time and space to develop. If you’re lucky enough to be ahead of the curve then help them get to where you are. Provide resources (helpful examples or past templates to leverage), discussions, and a feedback loop that both compliments strengths and identifies areas for improvement.
Let people make mistakes. I know, I’m asking for something incredibly painful, but very necessary because people need to make mistakes to learn. Give them smaller and simpler tasks so they can first fail and learn things in a safe environment with minimal impact to the project, then scale the responsibilities with more complexity. Remember that even though it takes longer to teach someone a skill rather than doing the task yourself, once they understand how to do it, that’s one less thing you have to do moving forward.
Give positive feedback in equal proportion to constructive criticism so your team won’t equate a discussion with you to a rectal exam. This will make the person more receptive to feedback because they won’t feel like you’re singling out the things they did wrong instead of acknowledging and appreciating the things they did right. In time, these interactions should strengthen the relationship and give the person more confidence to speak up and contribute, take more ownership of tasks, take on a bigger workload, and rely less on you which is the end goal.
Set regular touchpoint meetings once or twice a week as needed. Don’t hover over your team, let them know that (for example) every Monday and Thursday at 1PM you’d like to spend 30 minutes to discuss project updates, potential issues, and anything else on that person’s mind. This frees up your time to do your own work and it gives them breathing room and flexibility to get their work done, experiment, use their own work style, and come back for feedback.
The best way to navigate through politics and to be untouchable without lowering yourself to the bullshit that transpires in the office is this: be so damn good and so valuable to the organization that you become invincible to the gossip circles and power games that people play. If you’re a lawyer winning high-profile cases, a consultant delivering top engagements, an investment banker closing mega deals, a designer creating major campaigns, or a surgeon performing miracle surgeries– no one would be suicidal enough to come at you. Additionally, make sure to receive credit for the great work that you do. It’s not enough to be great, other people need to know this in order for you to be properly rewarded.
If, by chance, you’re in an organization that values stupidity and favoritism over integrity and merit then this is an issue of a toxic culture and you need to leave. Find a place that values someone like you so every day doesn’t feel like a constant uphill battle– demand better for yourself.
