Kaledo Art
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2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
ojovivo
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
KIROKAZE
oozey mess
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
will byers stan first human second
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Keni
Stranger Things
occasionally subtle
Discoholic 🪩
Show & Tell
DEAR READER
JBB: An Artblog!
dirt enthusiast
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seen from Malaysia
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@veridianblue
Love when I'm having intense writer's block, but push through it, push through it... until under all the crap blocking my path, I find fully formed in my mind one of the most beautifully phrased sentences I've ever written
(may contain light spoilers for my fic "She Never Asked to be Made Strong")
Kool-Aide Conversation
Five-year-old: What's that?
Me: A drink. Would you like some?
Five-year-old: ...does it have any sugar in it?
...the sun wished goodnight to all the sleeping cars...
@jewishwarriorprincess
A small selection. More to follow. All pictures taken in their natural setting. I deliberately didn’t rearrange anything (okay with the possible exception of the first). This is how my house looks on a typical day.
250 Plagues
One Passover a few years back my father paused the Seder at the point when the Rabbis start discussing precisely how many plagues G-d visited upon the Egyptians, and said something along the lines of: “Imagine having to come up with two hundred and fifty plagues. That’s a lot of plagues. I would never have thought that so many plagues existed. I challenge all of those present to create a list of two hundred and fifty plagues.”
At some point during the holiday my sister and cousin ran off, holed themselves up together for a few hours, and came up with a list of two hundred and fifty plagues, one in which they included such horrors as “inflatable men” and “more frogs.”
To follow is my take on this interesting and entirely pointful exercise.
1. Radioactive weasels.
2. Odd socks.
3. Carbon monoxide.
4. Bugs.
5. Jack O’Lanterns. Come to life.
6. Corrupt senators.
7. Infinite amounts of stale porridge.
8. Psychoanalysts.
9. Delirious fruitbats.
10. Disembodied tentacles.
11. Mutant hobbits.
12. Imaginary unicorns.
13. Exploding gallbladders.
14. Mustard flavoured crackers.
15. Rabid dingoes.
16. Extremely hungry dragons.
17. Acid rain.
18. Pacifists.
19. Embodied tentacles.
20. Shades of Grey sequels.
21. Self-replicating bok choy soup.
22. Real unicorns.
23. Depressed robots.
24. Clones of Donald Trump.
25. Vengeful snowmen.
- more to follow -
250 Plagues
One Passover a few years back my father paused the Seder at the point when the Rabbis start discussing precisely how many plagues G-d visited upon the Egyptians, and said something along the lines of: “Imagine having to come up with two hundred and fifty plagues. That’s a lot of plagues. I would never have thought that so many plagues existed. I challenge all of those present to create a list of two hundred and fifty plagues.”
At some point during the holiday my sister and cousin ran off, holed themselves up together for a few hours, and came up with a list of two hundred and fifty plagues, one in which they included such horrors as “inflatable men” and “more frogs.”
To follow is my take on this interesting and entirely pointful exercise.
Magical women
In order:
1. My adoptive greatgreatgreatgreat^e(abazillion) grandmother.
2. My greatgreatgreatgreat^e (abazillion) aunt.
3. See #1, above, minus the adoptive bit.
4.See #2, above.
Makes me think of how much I have to live up to.
I showed you mine so you show me yours!
I want to see anything and everything that you or your family may own that has to do with Judaism. I shared mine, you now share yours! :P
Woah. I’d have to take a picture of every inch of the house.
No, seriously, I’m not kidding. You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into.
Actually, that would be kind of fun. But it’ll have to wait ’til I’m on break next week.
I Wish I’d Once Said
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
I wish I’d once said
how much I love you.
Roses are red,
violets are blue -
with the tears that I shed
when you said we’re through.
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
The road’s lonely ahead.
Life’s better with two.
Roses are red,
violets are blue…
…your letter I’ve read.
I still miss you…
…too.
I was wondering if the chosen people got lonesome on valentine’s day as well. ;)
I feel like I ought to mention that there is a Jewish holiday celebrating love, on the fifteenth of Av: Tu B'Av. It’s about midsummer, which makes sense because its probably easier to fall in love when you’re not walking down the street accompanied by penguins. (Just a guess.) Unfortunately, no… no chocolate involved in Tu B’av. I don’t even know if chocolate was invented yet when they came up with the idea. (How can you have a romance without chocolate? I don’t know. It must’ve been tough. I imagine that they probably used dates instead. The kind you eat, not the kind you go out on.) But I posted it when I figured people might need it the most, even though personally I don’t even notice the holiday passing by. (Sorry? Really sorry? With chocolate cherries on top?)
Next year in Jerusa - no, wait, sorry, wrong holiday! Next year, may no one be lonely anywhere in the world.
- 🌷
No chocolate! I think it’s time the Jewish scholars reinterpret the possibilities of Tu B'av…
Excellent point. I’ll have to alert the appropriate authorities ASAP. Personally, I’m all for going back to the ancient custom in which all of the single girls danced together in a vineyard while the men picked out their future wives*. Okay, kidding, I’m not, cuz obviously the girls ought to be doing the picking and the men courting us with oodles and oodles of chocolate.
* Akin to the modern custom in which girls stand in the balconies of synagogues on Simchat Torah and throw candies down into the men’s section, and then pick out their future husbands based on which interesting and eligible boys the candy hits. (This is an actual game, made up by I don’t remember which of my siblings. No one’s ever actually gotten married out of it. Unfortunately, ’cuz it’s actually a good idea.)
Aah, the old throwing objects at the people we fancy in order to display courtship. You’d think natural selection would have ironed out this kink. I guess we just enjoy it too much.
I Wish I’d Once Said
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
I wish I’d once said
how much I love you.
Roses are red,
violets are blue -
with the tears that I shed
when you said we’re through.
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
The road’s lonely ahead.
Life’s better with two.
Roses are red,
violets are blue…
…your letter I’ve read.
I still miss you…
…too.
I was wondering if the chosen people got lonesome on valentine’s day as well. ;)
I feel like I ought to mention that there is a Jewish holiday celebrating love, on the fifteenth of Av: Tu B'Av. It’s about midsummer, which makes sense because its probably easier to fall in love when you’re not walking down the street accompanied by penguins. (Just a guess.) Unfortunately, no… no chocolate involved in Tu B’av. I don’t even know if chocolate was invented yet when they came up with the idea. (How can you have a romance without chocolate? I don’t know. It must’ve been tough. I imagine that they probably used dates instead. The kind you eat, not the kind you go out on.) But I posted it when I figured people might need it the most, even though personally I don’t even notice the holiday passing by. (Sorry? Really sorry? With chocolate cherries on top?)
Next year in Jerusa - no, wait, sorry, wrong holiday! Next year, may no one be lonely anywhere in the world.
- 🌷
No chocolate! I think it’s time the Jewish scholars reinterpret the possibilities of Tu B'av…
Excellent point. I’ll have to alert the appropriate authorities ASAP. Personally, I’m all for going back to the ancient custom in which all of the single girls danced together in a vineyard while the men picked out their future wives*. Okay, kidding, I’m not, cuz obviously the girls ought to be doing the picking and the men courting us with oodles and oodles of chocolate.
* Akin to the modern custom in which girls stand in the balconies of synagogues on Simchat Torah and throw candies down into the men’s section, and then pick out their future husbands based on which interesting and eligible boys the candy hits. (This is an actual game, made up by I don’t remember which of my siblings. No one’s ever actually gotten married out of it. Unfortunately, ’cuz it’s actually a good idea.)
https://www.fbi.gov/about-us/cjis/ucr/hate-crime/2014/tables/table-1
What’s really important to note here is the proportion of each religion in the general population - percentages by themselves are sort of meaningless (i.e., if Jews made up 66% of the American population, and Catholics 4.5%, then these numbers would make an extremely odd sort of statistical sense, although all hate crimes are bad so any number of hate crimes is bad regardless, etc etc).
Drawing on Wikipedia (I know it’s not a reliable academic source etc etc etc but it’s a starting point): Out of the total American population in 2014, Jews made up 1.9%, Muslims 0.9%, Christians 70.6%, and atheists 3.1%.
So that means that 1.9% of Americans (i.e., Jews) were the victims of 66% of hate crimes perpetrated because of religion.
Now that tells you something.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion_in_the_United_States
PS: According to my own quick-and-dirty analysis of the linked data, Jews make up only 60% of the victims of religiously motivated hate crimes in America (still a lot!). (609*100/1014 = 60.06). I didn’t do any of the research myself, and I’m not 100% sure where the data in the chart is coming from. So don’t take my word for anything - go look it up yourselves. (ALWAYS.)
- 🌷
I Wish I’d Once Said
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
I wish I’d once said
how much I love you.
Roses are red,
violets are blue -
with the tears that I shed
when you said we’re through.
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
The road’s lonely ahead.
Life’s better with two.
Roses are red,
violets are blue…
…your letter I’ve read.
I still miss you…
…too.
I was wondering if the chosen people got lonesome on valentine’s day as well. ;)
I feel like I ought to mention that there is a Jewish holiday celebrating love, on the fifteenth of Av: Tu B'Av. It’s about midsummer, which makes sense because its probably easier to fall in love when you’re not walking down the street accompanied by penguins. (Just a guess.) Unfortunately, no... no chocolate involved in Tu B’av. I don't even know if chocolate was invented yet when they came up with the idea. (How can you have a romance without chocolate? I don't know. It must've been tough. I imagine that they probably used dates instead. The kind you eat, not the kind you go out on.) But I posted it when I figured people might need it the most, even though personally I don't even notice the holiday passing by. (Sorry? Really sorry? With chocolate cherries on top?)
Next year in Jerusa - no, wait, sorry, wrong holiday! Next year, may no one be lonely anywhere in the world.
- 🌷
On A Bus In The Afternoon
On a bus in the afternoon
I saw you walking by.
The bus moved on
and you were gone
but still you filled
my eye.
Silence and Snow
Silence and snow
by moonlight aglow,
where true love’s first kiss
escapes
a snowball
gone amiss -
....awDARNit!!!
[running away like mad]
I Wish I’d Once Said
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
I wish I’d once said
how much I love you.
Roses are red,
violets are blue -
with the tears that I shed
when you said we’re through.
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
The road’s lonely ahead.
Life’s better with two.
Roses are red,
violets are blue...
...your letter I’ve read.
I still miss you...
...too.
On Poetry
In the beginning,
there wasn’t a poem.
Everyone was sad.
Then someone bravely
wrote a poem and
everyone was glad!
Then someone bravely
read the poem and
gravely he said:
“It’s bad.”
Last week, a group of students in my school proudly announced my university’s first BDS Week, proudly sponsored by Solidarity for Palestinian Human Rights, which is one of those ubiquitous student clubs plaguing every university campus, that insist on promoting anti-Semitism in the name of freedom of speech. BDS stands for “Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions” against (obviously) Israel. It is, as far as I can make out, an extremely proud but vehemently non-racist organization, the only non-racist organization I have ever encountered that feels the need to explain exactly what isn’t racist about it. BDS compares Israel to apartheid Africa, claiming that boycotting Israel, did I mention proudly, is a legitimate political strategy, to force Israel to cease to exist and blah blah blah blah blah...
There’s a particular garbage can on my university campus, on the fifth floor, right near the escalators going up, which contains a ripped-up newspaper, and if you feel like finding it and gluing it back together again - the newspaper, not the garbage can - the newspaper will tell you everything you’ll ever need to know about BDS, including a detailed explanation of why it’s not racist.
Although now that I think about it, you may as well waste your time trying to read the garbage can.
If you’re looking for another lecture about who’s right or wrong, or wondering whether or not it’s morally justifiable to kill Israelis for funsies, go away. It’s obviously not okay to knife Israelis to death, a fact that is - or rather, should be - exceedingly obvious to anybody who isn’t racist or insane. How is this being turned into a Israeli vs Palestinian debate? It’s not okay to walk around with knives, stabbing people. This is an obvious moral truth that I take for granted, and if you disagree with this, then I have nothing more to say to you.
Lecture over.
…no, no matter why you feel like killing them.
No. Just no.
Now please go away, and also stop stabbing people.
Lecture over, again.
Resume.
Everyone seems to feel the need to weigh in on one side or the other, like not stabbing people with knives is a questionable moral norm that requires intellectual justification. For some reason I’m still trying to understand, this appears, to the world, to be a legitimate debate. Odder still, the general public seems to have come to the conclusion that it’s okay to kill Jews if they’re a) Israeli Jews b) pro-Israel Jews c) Zionist Jews d) Jews-who-happen-to-be-in Israel Jews e) evil Jews f) Jews and g) more Jews.
Forgive me if I’ve missed any.
There are probably good reasons for this conclusion. There have been, in every era since Abraham, plenty of good reasons to kill Jews. Jews have committed many unbelievable crimes, such as a) poisoning wells b) murdering Christian children c) owning banks d) starting plagues e) not spontaneously handing over their property to non-Jews or conveniently dropping dead f) being Jews g) existing h) being French spies. No one’s ever murdered Jews, so far as I can tell, just because they felt like it.
And that’s that. What else is there to say, when people think that the truth is something that exists only so as to be made up? When all people are equal - but not the Jews? When discrimination and hatred and murder is morally acceptable so long as you only target Jews? When racism is justifiable? (”We’re not anti-Semitic! Jews really ARE evil!”) The world appears to be stuck on the notion that Jews ought to be fun and easy to murder. It’s an indescribably odd notion to be stuck upon.
It really doesn’t say much for the progress of humanity.
