TS3 Bunch family headcannons
• Ethan is 17, Lisa is 13, Arlo is 8 and a half, Darlene is 5 and a half. Shortly after the game starts, Judy gets pregnant with the last child, Thomas.
• They have a family curse wherein each pair of children closest in age to each other has mad beef. Ethan hates how much he has to pull Lisa out of trouble, while Lisa hates constantly getting compared to her perfect brother. Lisa hates how crazy Arlo is and how he made her the middle child, while Arlo thinks Lisa is a bitch. Arlo and Darlene have beef that would need an entire dissertation of its own. When Thomas is born, Darlene adores her new baby brother, and fears that he’ll also grow up to hate her. Her and Arlo try to one up each other on who’ll get to be the new kid’s favorite.
• When Thomas is born, he moves in with Arlo, while Darlene gets moved to Lisa’s room. Lisa is not thrilled over suddenly having to share a room but they form a sisterly alliance nonetheless. She’s the one to tell Darlene about the beefing patterns and Darlene is like oh shit don’t want my new brother to hate me and makes an effort to become friends.
• All 5 have the white person thing where they have platinum blonde hair until they become adults, when it turns a darker golden blonde (like Judy’s natural color).
• Judy is autistic, and Jack is neurotypical. Ethan is allistic, while Lisa, Arlo, Darlene, and Thomas are autistic.
• Lisa’s special interests include pink, fashion, and make-up. She has behavioral issues growing up because her parents aren’t really sure how to accomodate her needs.
• Arlo’s special interest is nature. He’s also the most ADHD and the most self-injurous.
• Darlene’s special interest is spooky freaky stuff. Her dream career is ghost hunter.
• Thomas’s special interest is fishing. He has an angler trait, as well as light sleeper, night owl, and dramatic. He likes fishing late into the night.
• Ethan is gay. He marries Christopher Steel, and they have no kids together (ew – he’s done way too much of that at home). He becomes a doctor and travels frequently in his bougie gay uncle DINK arrangement.
• Lisa is straight. She marries VJ Alvi, who she meets in jail. They are both so messy it somehow works and they make each other better. VJ cleans up his act and becomes a politician who appeals heavily to the disenfranchised working class, while Lisa is content in the job at the spa she’s had since forever. They have one daughter, Tammy, who has the good trait, dresses in a cutesy style, and is a natural cook (she’s autistic and it’s her special interest). Overall nothing like her parents but they adore her lots.
• Arlo is straight. He goes through multiple marriages in his life that all end in divorces eventually. He works as a firefighter and he’s a great one at that.
• Darlene is bisexual. She only gets into messy situationships, the longest and most dramatic being with Kaylynn Langerak. She works as a ghost hunter. She has one son, Austin, who happened by accident after Darlene woohooed with a random ghost man on the job.
• Thomas is straight (but kind of genderqueer and doesn't realize it). He marries Whitney Ursine, the daughter of Claire Ursine, who he meets because of her mother, who’s a mentor for him in fishing. They have a pretty idyllic marriage together and are obsessed with each other. They move to Isla Paradiso. Whitney is a published writer, while Thomas is an independent angler. They have one daughter called Maya (who hasn’t been born yet in my game but I already know I want to name her that).
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