BOOM, baby!

Piltover's Finest      ❝--sometimes, you gotta    make a door.❞                           - vi { closed RP, affiliated w/ institute of war. }

[visexual]

Just thought I'd drop by to tell you that I've seen your recent work and that I don't tell you that I appreciate you enough. Do you ever think we need a vacation? All expenses paid, by me? Next week? Get back to me, I'll see what I can do.

     Is... is this a joke? Are you serious? Really? REALLY? Aw, man, I knew you'd come around, I just knew it! 

    ... You are coming with me, though, right? Riiiight?

     -- I want to go to that theme-park! You know the one, down south-- with all of the yordle-themed balloons and shit, and the people dressed up in weird costumes and the big castle and fireworks? That's where I want us to go. Can I get a hell yeah?

[envyrayusa]

[ LOL / 快問快答 ] Sweetie →→→→→ ←←←←←Freak

[honor-death-and-hangovers-blog]

Hearing her description the man snickered, his imagination trying to more-or-less fit a playful gorilla into an office with a feline. It was something he would have liked to have seen. “I gotta admit a kind of respect for your collaboration despite… such… differences.” He laughed. He had wondered if the two could actually synergize to the point of liking each other.

Standing, Yasuo stuck his book in a satchel and crossed one arm over his body to stretch it. “What kind of action you get in Piltover anyway? Drugs? Weapons trafficking? Crazy rogue scientists?”

[visexual]

     "It'd be boring if we were both exactly the same person, anyway. We'd get so much less done because she always wants to adhere to the rules and the standard procedures and blah blah blah. Sometimes, you just have to punch a guy in the face; rules be damned. Paperwork doesn't stop anything!"

     At his question, VI perked up, seemingly pleased. "All of the above and more. It's a big place, y'know?  We get all sorts of loons. Just last week, a guy tried to smuggle in high-grade hextech explosives over the city border by putting them up his-- well, nowhere you want to reach into. It's crazy, the shit people try and get away with. Don't get me wrong: our city is completely safe. Thanks to yours truly, of course. Don't let anything I say put you off from visiting every once in a while!"

     "S'it any more peaceful around your neck of the woods? Do you have any law enforcement in Ionia?"

[demacian-dragonborn]

Shyvana couldn’t hide her curiosity as the pink-headed girl went about her explanation. Conversions of this kind were hardly odd, although they had become less frequent as her place in Demacia had solidified and her circle of contacts grown steadily smaller. When you only knew Demacians, and lived surrounded by their traditions and idiosyncrasies, it was easy to forget just how different the rest of the world could be. Sometimes words and gestures simply missed the mark.

“I see … and you want to ‘pal around’ with me” There was a marked scepticism to her tone. “I thought that only summoners were so forward about that sort of thing - summoners and Luxanna Crownguard”. The sliver of a smile. Truly she was feeling benevolent today.

“Demacians are friendly when they have reason. There are men and women in the Vanguard who speak as freely as you do – they joke, they laugh. Sometimes I join them, but they are never so loud in my presence”. A lackadaisical shrug. “The conversation is better than before I came to the city, and I have yet to kill any of them”.

"That is my measure of being ‘chummy’".

[visexual]

     "Nah!" Vi grinned, demeanor visibly shifting at the mention of Lux's name. "I mean, sure, blondie's plenty amicable-- but she's not the only one. Not to say that I'm constantly a ray of friendly sunshine, or anything like that... But summoners aren't the sole group that bothers to socialize. You should try it, sometime; take in some fresh faces. It's not too bad if you're with the right people: and, if you do try, and decide it's not your cup of tea, at least you can say you gave it a shot."

     ”That's about what I figured. Not so buddy-buddy around you, though? Why's that? Do you freak 'em out, or something? I mean, I gueeess I could get that..." Bright eyes narrowed as they gave Shyvana a good look over, top to bottom. "You have a sort of intensity about you. And, you know, there's the whole dragon thing, too. I figure a lot of people just don't want to risk getting on your bad side?"

     "Well, if not murdering someone is what being chummy is to you, then, well... I'll take it! If it's an offer, anyway, heh. Unless I am in fact on your hit-list, in which case-- please give me at least a five minute running head start."

[stormidable-deactivated20140813]

I ref-use to be subject to your crooked law enforcement any longer! If you intend to pursue, have at it— in fact I challenge you to successfully arrest the avatar of the wind.

[visexual]

     ...What was that, again? You... challenge me? This is officially a challenge? If that's how we're gonna play it, then it's time for the metaphorical gloves to come off. You're going down.

     I'll give you a five second head start. You better take advantage of it, because you'll need it, Goldilocks.

[stormidable-deactivated20140813]

  —don’t say it out of context like that! Onlookers will get the wrong idea! I assumed it was a form of attack, and responded accordingly… I have no interest in that kind of blowing!

[visexual]

     Say what? That you, Janna Windforce, said YOUR CHANCES OF BLOWING EITHER OF THEM, "THEM" BEING JAYCE OR EZREAL, REMAIN QUITE HIGH? Because if so-- okay, got it. I won't.

     Oh, you don't? Y'know, I didn't peg you as a player for that team... Huh! Guess you really shouldn't judge a book by its cover. Respect.

[stormidable-deactivated20140813]

But… ah. More importantly. Let’s forget that I ever asked that question, Vi.

[visexual]

     I could've forgotten, Janna. I could've. But then you said the phrase "my chances of blowing either of them remain quite high" and then it became ingrained in my head as one of the worst things anyone's ever said to me.

[purifyingbulletstorm-blog]

You’re…very convincing…If there are others joining this show, I guess I can help out. But not until I figure out who else you’re going to subject to skirts and dresses.

[visexual]

     'Course there are others! Lots of others who'll be showcasing their upper-thighs, too-- Pantheon, Ezreal, Jaycey-boy... Don't worry though; I have full confidence you'll be the one to steal the show. I'll hook you up with Piltover's best fashion designers. I'm thinking... Something silver, and lined with sequins.

[piltoverproud-deactivated201411]

"It’s not awful! Ladies seem to love it. If you think it’s that Gods Awful, then what style do you recommend?"

[visexual]

     "Jayce, for the thousandth time: your mother does not constitute as 'the ladies'. Let's see, for a recommendation, how about... literally anything else? Maybe something layered; something scruffy. Something that makes you look less like a middle-aged creep-o."

[purifyingbulletstorm-blog]

visexual said: Yep! A show that hasn’t even gone on yet. You wanna sign yourself up? You’d look great in a miniskirt.

[purifyingbulletstorm-blog]

…Honestly, I think I’ll pass on that…

[visexual]

     But I insist! C'mon, the crowd would love you. A brand-spankin'-new champion to the League, showcasing his bod at Piltover's Finest Fashion Show... What better way is there to increase your popularity?! It'd be the perfect way to say say "I'm here, I'm fine, and I'm not going anywhere".

[tidalwave-of-hope]

The corners of her mouth turn upwards. Yes, just want she wanted! Ezreal might hate her for it, but, whatever. He put the dress on last time, he could totally do it again so that Nami didn’t have to be the star… Benefits like that were great!

"Oh, no problem, Vi! I just didn’t want all of Ezreal’s behind-the-scene private shows to go unappreciated! He just needed a break…" She looked honestly concerned for the budding star that was about to be, before being offered a prize for her dirty work. "Ohh, wow… I have no idea what I could possibly want that I could ask you for, Vi… Maybe make sure Jinx doesn’t try to make me into the hit new flavor of Sushi straight from Mara..?" She laughed a little.

[visexual]

     Vi nods approvingly at the idea, beaming at Nami. "You got it, pal!" One mechanical hand extends outwards to pat the other woman's back-- maybe a bit too enthusiastically-- before planting itself firmly on her own hip.

     "Personal protector from that blue-haired twerp? You got it. Hell, if anyone else gives you trouble, I've got no problem with beating their asses into the ground, too. Just consider me your bodyguard for now! I mean, you are a champion of the League after all... A pretty high-profile celebrity like that needs someone to watch their back, y'know? It's only right!"

[visexual]

Vi, I'm confused. I've heard of blowing ON someone, but never "blowing" them. Is blowing someone a form of attack? Because if that's the case, my chances of blowing either of them remain quite high.

     And, cue the absolutely horrified expression that wastes no time in sinking onto Vi’s features— she has clearly made a grave mistake with her choice of verbiage. The enforcer is very swift (but careful) with pressing one giant mechanical finger up to Janna’s mouth; a desperate attempt at stopping the potential trainwreck mid-sentence.

     ”Janna— Janna no. Maybe I had a poor choice of words there, uh… What I meant is…” Hand-gestures do no good in conveying her meaning, so she does what she does best: attacks the problem straight on. “It means putting a dong in your mouth. So when you say there’s a good chance of you blowing either of them, well— I really have to question your life choices.”

[visexual]

     Damn, Ezreal, Jayce, con-trol your thirst. I'm sure you both dig blondie and all her windy tricks, but the last thing she's gonna be blowing is either of you.

[smelltheirfear-deactivated20150]

Ahem.

Somebody deleted the internet icon from my computer while I was “AFK”. I’m not saying any names, but Vi knows who she is.

[visexual]

    I did not delete it, I just renamed the shortcut to "HD Yordle Nudez". It still has the Internet prodigalExplorer icon; I thought you'd realize!

[squashingtime]

Well, since I’m planning to do a lil’ trip to Piltover in the near future, that would be just perfect! I’ll probably have to cover up a little, but I’ll make sure I come around and say hi to Caitlyn and you.

Well, you know your city better than me, but if I come up with anything, I’ll let you know.

[visexual]

      You are? Hot shit! Where are you staying? If you need somewhere to crash, I can offer up some space! I mean, it's not my space exactly, but I'm sure Jaycey boy wouldn't mind if you crashed on his couch... I invite myself over all the time; it'd be no biggie if you did it for a couple of nights.

      Okay! Just keep me updated. I mean, if you can't think of anything, we could just throw down in some old forest or something. Mud wrestling! Totally gross and old-fashioned; the primo way to get some tussling done. Wha'ddya say?

[ivallinen]

Artist: envyrayusa

Check out some other stuff by Kano, too. :)

[envyrayusa]

So fast XDDDDDDD English traslate !!

[demacian-dragonborn]

Jokes rarely agreed with Shyvana. It wasn’t that she was humourless and dour, as her peers the Vanguard had come to assume, but that all too many of them simply went over her head. 'Hot stuff' – the sort of stale remark that spilled from the lips of drunks and bawds. What such a title had to do with her she couldn’t say.

“When men call me something other than my name it is rarely kind. Your tone tells me that was not your intent but no, I do not ‘get it’”. Dark brows knitted together. “My name is Shyvana, not … ‘Hot Stuff’”.

Her other points could wait. “What did you mean by that?”

[visexual]

     Well, there went that attempt at friendly conversation. Vi's lips pursed tightly together into a straight line, an awkward silence descending upon the two for a few tense seconds.

     "Okay, yeah, I know your name-- but it was a joke. Like, you know... Hot? Hot like fire, from a dragon?" Vi's attempted explanation came along with exaggerated hand-gestures, played out by her comically oversized gauntlets.

     "It didn't mean anything weird or whatever it is you're thinking. It's just a nickname, y'know? Trying to pal around with you, or whatever. Unless you'd rather I not, in which case... I can, you know-- not do that. I'd be lying if I said I knew the first thing about Demacian culture, or if I have any idea if it's normal for you guys to be chummy with your allies like that or not."