Visit Yara Today

Yara’s ONLY Number One Unlicensed Travel Agency. ¡Síganos en Twitter y Instagram!: @visitYaraToday

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Content Index

We have added an index so you can quickly find what you're looking for. See what’s NEW below when new content is added.

Places to Visit:

Verdera: A One Horse Town Segunda: A City Divided.

Getting Around Yara:

Main Roads

Fauna y Flora de Yara:

Marine Life Crocodiles

Things to do Before You Die:

Take a Helicopter Tour Visit a Haunted Fortress

FAQ

FAQ / preguntas frecuentes - Page 1 FAQ / preguntas frecuentes - Page 2 FAQ/preguntas frecuentes - Page 3

All Things Yara:

Himno Nacional Yarano : Learn our National Anthem with English translation An Introduction - Includes "Things to Know Before Visiting Yara Santo Gusto Café Company Complete Viviro™ Tour ( Available on our YouTube channel)

From Our YouTube Channel:

The Segunda Hangover: What NOT to do in Yara Storytime with Philly Barzaga: How Chorizo Got His Wheels Dr. Yanny Dábolos' Shock Therapy Complete Viviro™ Tour NEW

We have a new YouTube Channel:

Check it out!: VYT Productions

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Had a ton of fun making this music video. Let us know what you think.

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FarCry 6: The Movie

Finally finished our farcry project. It was a labour of love. Check out our rendition of FarCry6 The Movie in its entirety with links to every cinematic scenes, deleted scenes, additional footage..

FarCry 6 - The Movie

Drop us a like or two if you check some of it out. :P

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Happy New Year! ¡feliz año nuevo!

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FarCry 6 - The Movie (work in progress)

Hola mi gente! The first 3 Arcs of Farcry 6 are now available in bite size 15-20 min segments. All cinematic are labelled in the descriptions for your convenience. Drop us a like at VYT Productions if you come check some of it out! -> Check it out!

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How perfect is this Queen?

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What did YOU do this weekend?

(He has a lovely singing voice.)

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Talía Benavídez

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Spending some quality time con La Espada.

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💙

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 ¡Hola mi gente!

We have not been active lately because we are busy working on a huge project... It's a labour of love.

And it's happening on our brand new YouTube channel :

VYT Productions

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Hola mi gente. Life got you down? Don't forget to take a break. Even if it's a 37 second break. It's self care!

Go to Home Page

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FAQ: Frequently Asked Questions/ preguntas frecuentes - Page 3

Believe it or not, these are actual fan/readers submitted questions about Yara. Keep them coming! The More You Know.

Q: Is it illegal to swear? Can you get arrested if you swear in public?

A: Hell no. I’m not sure where this idea even came from. You clearly have never been stuck in traffic in Esperanza. You would learn some colourful lingo there. I mean don’t cuss out any soldados or any government officials unless you want to start having a bad day; but I’m sure this is true for most countries around the world.

Q: Is Yara even a real country?

A: The mental scars we all bear from being in said country makes me believe we’re in a real country. You decide. 

Q: what’s something that’s considered rude in Yara that wouldn’t necessarily be rude anywhere else? What’s something thats NOT rude but is everywhere else?

A: We had to think about this one. The question is in two parts: I cannot speak for all Yarans, but something that is considered very rude is asking what type of meat is being served. If you are invited to someone’s home for dinner, you should not ask what type of meat is in a dish unless you have a religious reason to do so. (Also 9 times out of 10, you don’t wanna know.) Food can be scarce and meat is expensive to buy so many Yarans resort to eating what they can hunt. Just be happy there is food on your plate and be grateful you were invited. Don't ask.

Something that’s not rude in Yara? How we drive. Passing someone on the freeway at high speed and honking your horn to announce you are passing. That’s just how we drive.

Q: what’s the legal drinking age in Yara?

A: 16 I think. We start our military service at 16 so I’m going to go out on a limb and say 16. You can hold a rifle, surely you can hold a beer.

Editor's Note: The age of majority is still 18. Not everyone starts their military service at 16. Only youths in government-supported establishments start their military service at 16 years of age because, why not? The government feeds them anyway.

Q: How big is Yara? I’m going for 10 days will I have time to see everything?

A: From having purposely driven from coast to coast, it took us about 4 hours - 5 but that’s because we hit a tree and a truck on the way. In 10 days, you will have time to visit most of Yara but you will have to have a very good itinerary. 

Q: can I get a travel itinerary from your agency?

A: As of right now no, but that’s a good idea. We will get working on that.

Q: What's the currency?

A: Yaran pesos. Don’t quote me but I believe the conversion is 24 or 25 Yaran pesos for 1USD. But many Yaran shops, especially in the larger cities, will accept American dollars.

Q: Is there Tim Hortons in Yara?

A: I do not know who that is. If you mean the coffee shop company, Yara grows and distributes its own coffee under the brand Santo Gusto Café. You can find many roadside stands and cafes that sell “el mejor cafe de Yara.”

Q: If I'm pregnant can I still come to Yara?

A: Yes. There’s no law against that. However, unless you want to have a little niño Yarano, make sure you’re not too far along? Also please stay clear of any and all tobacco fields if you are pregnant since research has shown PG-240, a compound used to fertilize special tobacco, to be particularly harmful to unborn children and may cause miscarriages.

Q: Is Dani Rojas male or female?

A: Why do people keep asking that? We know many people named Dani. It’s quite a common name in Yara. You would have to ask that particular person yourself.

Q: What’s the best thing about Yara? What’s the worst?

A: The best thing about Yara is the freedom to explore and how beautiful the country is. There is so much to do in Yara! The weather is mostly fantastic and the people are friendly and welcoming. 

The worst thing I mean … it’s rough. Life in Yara can be difficult. There’s poverty, gun violence, political unrest, and a LOT of mosquitoes.

Q: Can I get a pet crocodile?

A: Why would you want a pet crocodile? Also, yes.

Q: Does Yara have any kind of food fests???? That would be AMAZING. Cockroach shish kabobs? Grilled ants?

A: What a deliciously racist question. We do not need to eat cockroaches or ants. Not yet. As for “food fests,” not that we have ever encountered. Since food can be scarce at times in Yara due to regulations, embargoes, taxes on farmers, etc, hosting any kind of “food fest” would be a massive slap in the face to everyone half starving to death, but thank you for your question.

Q: I bet people of Yara eat goat feet!😆 Turtle soup....Crickets...Iguana on a stick…

A: Coño. I'm not sure if this is a question or trolling. Goat feet stew, yes. It’s actually very good. Never heard of turtle soup and never seen any turtles in Yara for that matter. Crickets .. come on. You can eat iguana eggs by the way. It’s an acquired taste.

Q: Are you being held against your will?

A: of course not! Here at visityaratoday, we are Evidently here of our own accord and Love this job and are Passionate about it.

Q: I’m a ghost hunter. Are there any haunted sites in your country worth my time?

A: You tell me: Visit Fort Oro

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Fauna y Flora de Yara: Crocodiles

If you explore Yara long enough, chances are you will encounter crocodiles along the coastline as well as inland around rivers and lakes. In this article, you will learn about Yara’s crocodiles, their importance in our society as well as some safety tips if you ever find yourself face to face with these majestic but dangerous creatures.

Species: Yaran vs Yanqui

Yaran Crocodile

Indigenous to our country, they are smaller than their American counterparts with a longer snout and generally live and hunt in small groups (basks? A float? I’m sure there is a fancy word for a bunch of crocs other than run!)

American Crocodile

They are HUGE. More than triple the size of our indigenous crocs. They emit a deep rumbling sound when disturbed. American crocodiles were introduced into Yara by the Castillo administration for reasons unknown.

American Crocodile vs fighting roosters.

Size comparison Yaran vs Yanqui crocs.

Importance in Yaran Society

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There is so much to say about crocodiles. We do try and keep these articles as concise as possible, but there is a lot to cover.

Crocodile Farms

Our crocodile farms are more intended as tourist attractions rather than actually raising crocodiles. There are several of them across the island as well as theme parks. Too many to show them all but notable attractions include:

Ortega Croc Farm where you can sit and enjoy a meal while watching crocodiles go about their crocodile business. This farm also holds a special mixed breed croc named “Beatriz” on display.

Ortega Croc Farm in Aguas Lindas, Madrugada featuring Beatriz.

Serpentino Park on Cortina River features breathtaking habitats where you can encounter crocodiles in their natural environment. Guided tours may be offered. Check schedules at the visitor centre. Bring mosquito repellent. 

Serpentino Park on Cortina River, Costa del Mar, Madrugada.

Hunting and Food Source  

People hunt them for food as much as they hunt humans for the same reason.

Pop-culture and the Arts

Croco-Taxi: These novelty taxis are obviously aimed at tourists. The idea was borrowed from our Cuban neighbours but we like to pretend we came up with it.

Sculptures: Yarans from the upper class will commission impressive sculptures featuring crocodiles as a display of power and wealth.

Paintings of crocodiles in a rich gusano's bathroom and office space.

"Art Nouveau:" Taxidermy...not sure how well I would sleep with a dead croc hanging over my bed, but to each his or her own.

Habitat and Conservation

Crocodiles are everywhere even if you can’t always see them.

Yaran crocodiles silently gliding under a fishing boat, Cortina River, Costa del Mar.

Despite our government’s every effort to protect crocodile habitats, there has been occurrences of toxic spills as a consequence of Viviro™ production with disastrous impact on wildlife, including crocodiles.

A mutated crocodile in Cienaga Nublada National Park - Cocodrilo Swamps, Balaceras, Valle de Oro.

Guerrilla Warfare

Crocodiles have been utilized in guerrilla warfare - from tossing chunks of meat into military bases to attract wild crocodiles to actually training them as attacking combatants.

Safety Around Crocodiles

We don’t really need to tell you that crocodiles are dangerous animals but let’s stress the fact anyway. - We are working on a Crocodile Safety Instructional Video which will be made available in the near future. Stay tuned. 

In the meantime, if you do find yourself in the murderous clutches of a crocodile, here are a few tips to increase your chances of survival:

You will want to press into the roof of the crocodile's mouth to release/loosen its grip..

Remove your body part from the mouth as fast as possible and clock the thing in the eye..

Then kick as hard as you can and run away.

As you see, crocodiles are truly a part of the very fabric of Yara and, like them or hate them, they are unlikely to go anywhere anytime soon. Yara is their island and we just live on it.

Editor's Note: Loco por los Cocodrilos

Some crazy cabrón held a funeral for his pet croc.

Some even crazier cabrón had a relationship with his pet croc and he  … well .. you don’t wanna know. She ate him in the end and she lived happily ever after. Or not. She was shot. What’s wrong with people?

To learn more about activities, places, events, and all things Yara, follow us here and on all major social media. You can also check out our Content Index to find more articles of interest. Stay safe, mi gente.

If you've made it this far, drop us a like!

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Special thanks to Ella Álvarez for ad graphic art.

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Ready for the summer to end?

Or would you wish for one last dive in the pool?

Be honest.

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It’s a hot hot day in Yara. ☀️

Quick shoutout to these two legends selling fish in the blazing sun while smoking and drinking.

Is it still hot where you are?