I haven't had this much energy in ... God, I don't know how long.
Where it came from, Iâm not sure. Maybe itâs the changing of the seasons. The longer days. Or maybe it's him. Him with his little quips. He always knew how to push my buttons. I figured that out as far back as Tokyo.
All except now, he has me chasing him through the mountains and valleys of the Montana wilderness. Wilderness we both know very, very well.
The act of chasing him was foolish. But it felt almost ... exhilarating. As if it's something I didn't know I needed. Perhaps that's what kept me going. Made me dead set on catching him. Which I did.
I finally tackled him at the edge of a field. I think we rolled down a hill. Then I opened my eyes and...
The moment we stared at each other felt much longer than it probably was. I wanted to leave. Get the hell away from him and go as far away as I could. Yet, I couldn't. I was frozen.
It was only when he started laughing did I move off of him. I should have fled then. Instead, I just ⊠sat there. It was ... embarrassing.
I didn't want to look at him again. I shouldn't have. But that glance I caught of him⊠I fear it was my gravest mistake.
He sat up, laughing still. It was like music to my ears. There were some wildflowers in his quills. Yellow. Red. The perfect contrast to his blue coat, which shined like sunlight reflecting the ocean.
I don't know what was happening with me. I couldn't stop my train of thought, let alone question it. I thought I was going to laugh with him, given how contagious his laugh can be. But what came out was anything but that.
It was that sneeze. Or at least, what I had thought was a sneeze. Now that it came from my nostrils instead of his, I would describe it as a snort or a huffing and puffing of some kind. And it was loud.
His laughter stopped. Now he was instead looking, no, staring at me in absolute awe.
I felt myself panic. What was this noise I was making? Why is he staring at me? I couldn't stop it. I couldn't pull myself together. My heart was racing. My face and ears felt warm. My stomach was in knots. I felt like I was going to explode.
I finally managed to get myself out of there.
It's been a short while since I teleported home. I found a few leaves and flowers in my own quills. ... I feel like I want to rip them out. Feel the warmth of blood rush down my skull. Scratch the flesh of my arms until nothing remains.
Something is wrong. Deeply wrong. I don't have weird, perverted thoughts like that. No one makes me ... react that way, whatever it means.
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