You say you're afraid to lose me.
I'm just scared you face your fears...
cherry valley forever
Not today Justin
YOU ARE THE REASON
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@vivid-inspiration
You say you're afraid to lose me.
I'm just scared you face your fears...
The moon was mine, was it not?
The stars were supposed to call my name.
The waves were supposed to rest our souls.
The Aurora borealis were supposed to dance to my heart beat.
You were supposed to be mine, and I was to be yours.
I wish I ran away faster.
Disappeared into the shadows of what we were and could have been.
Instead. Instead. Instead.
Here I am. Again. Again. And again.
The moon used to be mine but now it is yours.
Yours to love, to hate, to cherish, to destroy.
Whatever you please, my love.
31st May 2022
And now, que the sleepless nights...
Written words to never be spoken.
We think it's a moment. A click that defines a realization. And maybe it is for some people. Maybe things just fall into place. The cogs start moving, the key just turns.
It wasnt that for me, I just dont believe enough for that. A series of events needs to happen. A string of long comprehensive thoughts. A consistent tug of emotions.
The idea that "it just happened" just doesnt make sense to me. The uncertainty of it. The unpredictability. How do you prepare for it? Do you just remain on guard? Especially when it comes to people... How does one just hope for the best? I understand that life doesnt come with guarantees, but relying on the good intentions of people seems reckless and dangerous.
People are fickle. And theres always a pattern. There is always a trail.
A string of broken promises, a habit of deceit, something... a tell tale we ignore. A red flag we pretend we are colour blind to.
A look, a word, a gut feeling? Something. Things dont just "happen".
A gut feeling, overwhelmed with paranoia. Pumping through my system, telling me, yelling at me, intrusive thoughts.
How does one differentiate? Paranoia from instinct.
I've made this mistake before. Only last time, it turned out to not be a mistake. It was instinct fueled by paranoia but I was still right. Yet, I was still punished for it. I suffered the consequences for years after, the after taste still bitter on my tongue as I didnt learn my lesson.
But how could I? When the paranoia was justified? How could I not make the same mistake that broke my trust but brought the truth to light. Or rather, the lies and betrayal to light?
I saw the signs, I knew. It wasn't just a moment. It was moments built onto each other. Burdening the weight over and over again until it was just another habit.
So now, I keep an eye out. I feed into the paranoia. Better safe than sorry?
And all it would cost me is a broken soul, broken faith, the remainder of my sanity, and maybe a broken heart.
All I wanted was to love you.
All I wanted was to love you.
Hold you close to me and hear your heart beat.
Watch your smile as we binge watch our shows.
Intertwine my fingers with yours as memorize how your skin feels.
All I wanted to do was love you.
And travel across the world in your arms.
Take a picture of every memory to post on my wall.
Kiss your cheeks a thousand times until I irritate you.
All I wanted to do was love you.
And fall asleep hours before you because I'm always sleepy.
Wake up and find you right there next to me.
Scoot over to get closer even though it's too hot.
All I wanted to do is love you.
And hear you say you love me too.
And see you see me like you need me too.
And feel you want to stay with me too.
All I wanted to do was love you.
And somehow you made it feel like it was punishment.
Made me look like an idiot to the world and me.
Made me doubt my own self worth.
All I wanted was for you to want me.
To want to love me.
To want to love me
To want to love me, like I love you...
Instagram: @mind.of.moony
And so it sets,
Until tomorrow...
We wait, patiently...
Instagram: @mind.of.moony
Overwhelmed and exhausted by just trying to be a normal functioning person in society.
Instagram: @mind.of.moony
I struggle
I fight
I yell
I cry
My mind tells me to let you go
Inside, I'm falling apart
I'm tired
I'm tired
My heart is breaking
It's not you
It's not me
Its us
No, its me
Its me
Its me
I saw that like on my new photo, and I thought it was a sign for us.
Until I realized not only did you like it by mistake but you also ended up unfollowing me...
Modern age break up closures...
I can't even begin to imagine a life without you in it, but I must finally walk away.
“She imagines him imagining her. This is her salvation.”
♪ ♪ He’s leavin’ on that midnight train to Georgia Leavin’ on the midnight train Yeah, said he’s goin’ back (Goin’ back to find) To a simpler place in time Whenever he takes that ride guess who’s gonna be right by his side ♪ ♪ - House MD 6x19
By furafura
is it possible that plants have consciousness?
this is actually a small sub branch of botany thats been growing and gaining some recognition in the past 5 years or so called plant cognition! we’ve been thinking about if plants can possibly be intelligent to any degree for centuries, but the main paper that started up this huge discussion in the modern era was one called Experience Teaches Plants to Learn Faster and Forget Slower in Environments Where It Matters by Monica Gagliano, a plant researcher in Australia who specializes in it. because the results indicated that plants were possible of learning and retaining information in a kind of memory in response to environmental changes, it received a lot of backlash and denial- generally in science, that kind of intelligent reaction to an organism’s environment is a good indicator of cognitive behavior in the organism. it got rejected by 10 different journals before being published in 2014.
the experiment worked like this. i’ve talked before about mimosa pudica, a tropical plant that curls its leaves back when touched (they go back to normal in a few minutes):
this is to help deter predators among other things. but in this experiment, Gagliano used it as an indicator of stimulus and to test cognitive function. It’s well known that pudica has a rudimentary nervous system that can even be temporarily inhibited using anesthetics (just like ours can!). she hooked up a ton of these plants in pots to identical rail systems that allowed them to be lightly dropped in an identical way, juuuuust heavy enough to trigger the stimulus so all the leaves drop down when they hit the bottom (a piece of foam so they wouldn’t actually hurt the plants). every time the plants would be dropped, they would close up.
but after the plants were dropped about 60 times each, they stopped responding to the drop.
they remembered that no harm was coming from this action and decided that it was against their best interests to keep expending energy closing their leaves. they 200% learned to stop.
she decided to test it further. she put some of the plants in a shaker and let them receive a more jarring response; the plants closed up as usual. then, she put them back in the droppers and dropped them again. they didn’t close up. they had remembered that response. this dispels the obvious rebuttal to this experiment of the plants just being tired; they still closed up when stimulated differently.
they just chose not to close up when they hit a stimulus they remembered.
it turns out that not only could they remember to keep their leaves open when dropped on the apparatus, but they remembered after 28 days when she kept testing it!! apparently by the end of the experiment, all the plants had decided to keep their leaves open when dropped!!!!
how do they do this?? we literally dont know. they have no central brain, only a basic nervous system. can other plants do this???
well, adding onto that, venus fly traps can count! like. they have three hairs inside their traps, and all three must be touched within 20 seconds for the trap to close. once closed, those three trigger hairs must continue to be stimulated by thrashing prey, or the trap will reopen.
so yeah like. basically ‘are they sentient’: apparently to an extent???? we dont know exactly why or how but they are??? maybe???? sort of????? at least some of them are?? but they dont have a brain so everyones like????????????????????? maybe its through a signaling network????????????????? but like how would that even work?????????
plant consciousness is still new enough to be dismissed as crazy by a lot of biologists but like. the evidence is there. we don’t know a whole lot and its clearly a radically different kind of intelligence than we know in animals, but it’s there and we 200% dont know how it works yet or even the full extent of how plants use this intelligence (for example: does a redwood have the same intelligence as a venus fly trap?? how does it learn things and use that knowledge???)
national geographic wrote an awesome article visualizing the experiment here if you want to read more!
This isn’t even touching on the fact that plants exchange nutrients with other plants through their root networks and engage in constant “bartering,” sometimes withholding resources until they get something extra. This is all performed with the aid of fungi, and the fungi in turn seem to weigh options and make decisions that will best benefit both themselves and their plant symbiotes. Sometimes two plants even get territorial and try to poison one another, and the fungal network steps in to put a stop to it.
http://e360.yale.edu/features/exploring_how_and_why_trees_talk_to_each_other
http://science.sciencemag.org/content/352/6283/342
http://www.plantphysiol.org/content/159/2/789