Vivid & Awake

Good music, bad poetry and lessons I've learned along the way.

[vividandawake]

Eleven fifty nine ~ Vivid & Awake

[vividandawake]

Midnight Penitence

What right do I have to impose my advice on people's happiness? Because what's right in my mind may not be logical or relevant. I learn the hard lessons only after I've spoken and stuck by them. And now I struggle to fall sleep, guilty for everything I've ever said. ~ Vivid & Awake

[vividandawake]

Midnight Penitence

~ Vivid & Awake

[vividandawake]

Pavements

On the pavement, I grow taller as the sun disappears Expressionless and free from failure everything I'm not Street lights come to greet me on the pavement but I'm gone How long can I keep pretending to be everything I'm not The cracks on the pavement follow where I walk An intricately planned agreement that will always be my downfall My guiding star loses purpose, all I see is pavement as I crawl How long will this charade last before the fraud in me is exposed ~ Vivid & Awake

[vividandawake]

Pavements

~ Vivid & Awake

[vividandawake]

Ruins

You and I, we fell so hard unprepared, I ran away to preserve your heart. Thus, you found love in another's arms. Now I'm prepared but with no one to love. •Vivid & Awake•

[vividandawake]

Ruins •Vivid & Awake•

[vividandawake]

Words

Trying to find the words that will heal. Searching for something to say, that may take away a little bit of the fear.

What use will my words have, I ponder. Our world is already beyond repair, no amount of words can make it better.

But words are important in these trying times. They may not be a fix or a solution, but the right words that form part of a conversation can lead to small and steady changes.

And in time, your words will form the foundation of the resolution. So right now, all we can do is to keep the conversation going.

•Vivid&Awake•

[vividandawake]

I took a week off from writing. The tragic events that have occurred globally in recent times, have always gotten under my skin but really boiled over personally this past week thus causing an "amateur writer's block" of sorts. I heard about what happened in Nice, France while having Friday night drinks with some workmates. I recall getting so sad and angry that I yelled out some profanities and slammed the drink I was holding on to the table, I certainly startled the people I was with. I guess it wasn't the right environment to exhibit those emotions. But it was at that very moment that I felt so helpless and scared for the world. Why was this happening with such alarming frequency and what can we do to make it better? In the last few days, I realised there is no immediate solution. All we can do is to keep the conversation going and help each other out through the fear with quite simply, words.

[vividandawake]

Drowning in discarded hopes and dreams Immersed in everything I said I wouldn't be Always swimming against the current it seems - Undercurrent •V&A•

[vividandawake]

Undercurrent

Drowning in discarded hopes and dreams Immersed in everything I said I wouldn't be Always swimming against the current it seems Stormy weather Never better Tell me stories of smooth sailing and endless horizons Describe perfect sunrises and sunsets You see, I've forgotten what's it's like to see such sights In careless abandon, replaced instead with worries and regrets •V&A•

[vividandawake]

Undercurrent •V&A•

[vividandawake]

Vicious Cycle

Just when I thought that I had clawed my way out, a thousand shovels of dirt rain in on me. I watch as the brilliant blue sky slowly fades, the dirt closes in until I can no longer see. Just when I thought I could finally breathe, my battered heart is dealt another blow. more intense than the last, it begins to show in my expressions, every movement seethes. Just when I thought I was finally free, the chains that hold reign me back to reality. A vicious cycle I've become acquainted with, will never have all of what I dream to be. And that tiny spark is all I need. •V&A•

[vividandawake]

Vicious Cycle. •V&A•

[vividandawake]

A home for the heart

Like a leaf blown off a tree by the wind, imperiled to live with the grass. Where is home? Does anyone know?

 Longing to belong… come back wind! Pick me up and carry me far away. Where do I want to go? Even I don’t know.

 Fly over mountains and fall into the sea, float along rockpools. Is this where I should be?

 Is this where I should be?

 •V&A•

[vividandawake]

A home for the heart. 

•V&A•

[vividandawake]

Unrequited Requiem

Sorting through a box of reasons in my head to make you feel that you haven’t been rejected lying and deceiving, delaying the inevitable it won’t help my case but it may soften the blow.

I can tell you the truth but you won’t want to hear it the spheres I control you were never in it struggling to comprehend what I’ve been denied of opting for what’s easier over all that I’ve ever wanted.

This is not what I imagined this is not what I had planned my dreams and my wishes seem so distant now.

I was given the choice I could have stayed with you and fought for it all we could have proven them wrong we could have lived the life that we dreamed of.

•V&A•