If someone doesn't want to do something, please listen to them and don't make them do it.
Forcing people to do things they don’t want to do is no way to build a team.
For years I've been observing and people have been constantly reaching out to me as to how to deal with this, based on personal experiences and on a request im doing this WRITE UP, which has been way long over-due. I've been so so tired preaching and counseling same to many in sisters and brothers.
Just because your ways of dealing with a situation or people have set of ways, your old ways, your mothers ways, your ancestors ways and blah, do not expect same from the opposite person, and make them feel helpless, different people, different backgrounds, different caste, different creed, different religion, different mindsets, different ethnicity, different upbringing, different perception, different Perspective, different morals, different humane, different level of patience, different characteristics, different values, don't compel, don't persuade people, accept people as they are don't push them to the edge of the cliff. Someone poor and dear people get so dreadful even with your presence let alone be your baseless advices, spare them, put your foot down before any harm is caused. Mind your own business, unless your dear and loved ones come seeking your advise on their own. Do not impose your ideologies when the opposite person is in disagreement/disapproval. Live and let live.
As soon as you’ve successfully forced your loved or dear one to do something that they do not want to do, the mission is accomplished, you have separated that person from the team; you have made them different. You may think they are still physically with you but you have lost them to heart and soul, what a great loss. This can be difficult, since different people will find different things uncomfortable. The trick is to find an activity where different members of the team perform different roles, so there is something for everyone. And when you think about it, isn’t that how teams tend to work anyway?
I don't think so anybody should force anyone, not parents to children, not children to parents, not sisters to brothers, not brothers to sisters, not friends to friends, not neighbors to neighbors, not even to helpers of the household, not to any human being, and nobody should force anything on anyone it shows very low.self-esteem about yourself. Everyone must seek permission whether if they want to do it what you are asking them to do, rather imposing/compelling them into doing something.
Take permission from your people before you want to request something, ask a favor, want them to do something for you but don't expect or push someone to do things that they don't want to do please.
In English there are some ways as to how to ask for permission politely: May I .. ? Can you .. ? Could you .. ? Do you mind if .. ? Is it alright if .. ?what do you say about? Please could you do this for me?Would it be all right if?
And even after you have placed your proposal or request to the person for doing something for you and if the person still says a humble/polite "NO", and refuses to do so, then just leave people in peace, don't impose your ideologies that you have been living with in your head or seen growing up for years and expect someone to do the same and leave people in peace, and after the person has refused just leave without feeling bad or offended. DO NOT MAKE ANY MATTER COMPLICATED FOR a FELLOW BROTHER OR SISTER. There are very innocent men and women out there who don't have a voice, just because they are intimidated by you, or are shackled by family values, or are binded with the so called respect they have for you, but in reality there is no respect, they are forced to respect you. Don't use them. Don't take their silence as weakness. Fear Allah(GOD) swt.
And most importantly it's a forgotten SUNNAH/MANNERS not to force anyone. Its ABSURD. Some people don't even knock the door these days before they enter someones space.
Don't EVER FALTER TO SAY "NO" when you don't want to do something, just say "NO" without blinking of an eye.
May Allah(GOD) swt give us all such Hidayah(guidance) and salahiyath(ability) to be so