(ju)lianna , she/her , 20 , gym rat , retailslop warrior , canadian cowboy (real)
aspiring member of the publishing industry once i trudge through business school, freaky nasty fanfic will do for now. currently extremely erling haaland piled
premier league team is arsenal cuz they remind me of the leafs
timezone is mst and i am always open for a chat although iâm terrible at dms⌠willing to give out my discord occasionally, i do enjoy having conversations with anons tho!
to be honest i don't think ur team should be arsenal because deadass they are not like the leafs they actually be winning shit and have more than 2 good players - yes all tea all shade rn but i think if you want a team that really represents that kind of struggle bus you gotta look at ones that are usually in relegation zone or are scrappy fighters, something like everton or honestly man united could be an accurate mirror team (but also everyone hates them)
Itâs also in the family guys đ
Also the leafs definitely have more than 2 good players? đ
request: haaland x reader fic with some manhandling, soft degradation (like he is a bit cocky and smug but still a sweatheart) and a whole lot of praise. like maybe itâs been a long day for both of them and reader has been on the edge all day (not necesserally being a brat tho) and he understands that she just need him to take care of her omg
warnings: unprotected sex, once again he makes you take it cuz he's packing, manhandling, hair pulling, some slight disassociation type things but mostly just like brain-melting pleasure
pairing: erling haaland x fem!reader
word count: 2421
notes: hello, this is just pure freaky nasty smut, basically no story lmao so enjoy! traditional beg for likes/reblogs/comments/extra thought in my inbox :) requests r open , this is not proof read srry if it's choppy
all day, an ache has been blooming under your skin like a fever you canât quite shake. youâve been restless, tight-shouldered and soft-mouthed, eyes flicking to your phone every time his name lights up, stomach twisting with an anticipation that never settles. everything feels too much and not enoughâyour body thrumming, skin tingling, every brush of fabric making you clench your thighs, wanting, wanting, wanting.
now youâre here, finally, straddling erlingâs hips, your knees braced on either side of him, breath coming fast as you sink down onto him. his hands are splayed broad and patient on your thighs, thumbs stroking little lines up toward your hips, and heâs watching you with that gentle, knowing look, a smirk curling at the edges of his mouth.
his blue eyes flick over your face, cataloguing every little whimper, every shudder. heâs shirtless, skin burning with heat under your hands, the scent of him all salt and something fresh, and you canât help but lean in, nuzzling at his jaw, breathing him in, greedy for the way he smells, the weight of his body under yours.
âlong day, huh?â his voice is so low itâs almost a rumble, soft and smug, and you can feel it vibrate through his chest where your palms press. he hums, the sound rich and lazy, fingers flexing against your hips, not forcing, just guiding, letting you take as much as you can. âlook at you, sweet thing. so desperate for me you can barely think.â
you try to roll your hips, but youâre so sensitive itâs almost unbearable, the stretch of him inside you making you shudder, thighs trembling as you gasp. âerlingââ you whine, voice shaking, âitâs too much, i canâtââ
he tsks, the sound playful, almost pitying, and his hands tighten, grounding you. âoh, i know. look at you, falling apart already. youâre always so dramatic when you need me, arenât you?â he leans up, kisses the hollow of your throat, his lips soft, tongue tracing a line where your pulse flutters. âyouâre not going anywhere. let me take care of you...â
you can barely speak, mouth open and panting, but you manage to get out, âpleaseâjust⌠i needââ and he just hums, slow and indulgent, rocking his hips up into you, making you gasp, your nails digging into his shoulders. you can feel every inch of him, thick and unyielding, filling you so deep you can barely breathe.
âthere you go, love,â he says, voice syrupy, âsuch a messy girl. i love how you canât help yourself around me, how you always end up here, whining on my cock, so pretty and needy.â his hands slide up your waist, fingers curling around your ribs, holding you steady as he begins to move you, up and down, slow and relentless, every thrust making you keen, tears prickling at your lashes.
you try to move on your own, rocking down onto him, but every thrust sends a bolt of heat through you so sharp your breath catches, and the stretch is too much, too overwhelming. you whimper, nails scraping at his chest, forehead pressed to his as you pant, âitâs too much, iâm tooââ but the words dissolve into a needy moan as he groans, low and so pleased, at the feeling of you squeezing around him.
he just smiles, all dimples and softness, so achingly sweet for a man this size. âyeah? too much for you? i can feel everything.â his voice is syrupy, a gentle, coaxing lilt, coaxing every whine from your lips. âlook at you, all shaky... canât even fuck yourself right now, can you? good thing youâve got me.â
he doesnât ask, doesnât tellâhe simply takes over, the shift of his grip from gentle to possessive, fingers biting into your skin just enough to make you gasp as he lifts you, muscles flexing in his forearms, and brings you down hard on his cock. the impact makes you wail, eyes squeezed shut, thighs trembling uncontrollably. âshh,â he hums, lips brushing your cheek, âlet me, just let me. you need someone to handle you, donât you?â
he works you like that, strong hands guiding you up, then dropping you back down, deep and slow, filling you so completely it feels like youâll break apart. you canât help but cling to him, arms wrapped tight around his neck, face buried against his throat, inhaling that clean, familiar scent of himâshampoo and sweat and something so distinctly erling it makes you dizzy. his laugh is barely a sound, more a pleased exhale against your ear as his arms flex, drawing you closer, keeping you right where he wants you. his hands dwarf your waist, fingers splayed wide, and when you shake, unable to keep moving, he just tuts, a soft scold.
âoh, baby, look at you,â he murmurs, voice low and honey-thick, the words vibrating through your bones as he hoists you upâeffortless, like you weigh nothing at all. âall that whining and now youâre just falling apart on me, huh?â his tone is gentle, so sweet it almost hurts. âthought you could handle it, but you really just need me to take over, donât you? my perfect little thing, always so sensitive.â
he shifts, one hand sliding up your spine, finding the base of your skull, his palm warm and broad as he gently knots your hair in his fist. you whimper, head tipped back, mouth open as he tugs, not cruelâjust enough to make you arch, to bare your throat and chest, to leave you gasping. you can feel the heat of his gaze as he watches you, so greedy, so full of adoration and pure, greedy delight. âthatâs it, there you go,â he coaxes, his other hand locked tight around your hip, guiding you down onto him again, slow and deep and relentless.
the drag of him inside you is overwhelming, every nerve set aflame, your body barely able to keep up as he rocks you, making you ride his cock with the easy, controlling motion of his arms; you try to meet him, to do something with your hips, but heâs got you, heâs doing all the work, and itâs so much easier to just let go and let him move you, maneuver you, use you the way he knows you need.
his fingers in your hair tighten, tilting your head so he can press his mouth to your ear, his breath hot as he praises you, soft and smug and so damn loving it makes your heart ache. âsuch a mess,â he hums, âbarely even got started and youâre already coming apart. so greedy for me, so helpless. you just want to be handled, is that it? want me to remind you how good it feels to let go?â
ây-yesââ you choke, words dissolving into a high, needy moan as he thrusts up, impossibly deep, the stretch almost too much, your whole body trembling against him. heâs relentless, but never harsh, every movement calculated, every sound you make drawing another pleased sound from his lips. his praise wraps around you, thick and warm, tangled with teasing that only makes you melt harder for him.
âthatâs my girl,â he croons, moving you faster now, hips snapping up to meet the downward roll of your body, your hands flying to his shoulders, clinging for dear life. âtaking it so well, even when youâre too full...â
he shifts his grip, sliding his hand from your hip to your ass, squeezing, guiding, lifting you up and down with so little effort it almost feels like youâre weightless. his hand in your hair tugs a little harder, forcing your gaze to meet his, eyes burning with pride and hunger and something impossibly tender. âlet me see you, sweetheart,â he purrs, and you fall apart for him, shivering and gasping, every thrust blurring into white-hot pleasure, every touch another reminder of how completely he owns you. his praise is endless, his grip unyielding, and the world narrows to the sound of your moans, the heat of his body, and the perfect, dizzying feeling of being taken care of exactly the way you need.
you can barely breathe through it, every inhale catching in your throat, spilling out as broken sounds against his lips. his hand is still in your hair, holding you right where he wants you, the other locked firmly on your ass, fingers digging in as he uses his strength to rock you on him, up and down, deep and steady.
youâre so far gone you canât tell where you end and he begins. his chest is a wall of heat against yours, his thighs solid under you, his cock thick and hard, stretching you open over and over until your head is spinning. you cling to him helplessly, nails raking over his shoulders, your forehead dropping to his as your moans turn high and thin.
you gasp, every syllable trembling, âi canât, i canâtââ
he just hums, soft and pleased, eyes half-lidded as he watches you unravel. âyou can,â he says simply, âyou always can. my girl doesnât give up when it feels this good.â
he pulls your hair a little more, just enough to arch your back, to bare your throat as he leans in and kisses along your jaw, your neck, tongue tracing the line of your pulse. the slight sting at your scalp only makes everything sharper, makes you clench tighter around him, and he groans, a quiet, reverent sound that vibrates against your skin.
âso good, fuck, min kjĂŚre,â he breathes, his fingers flexing on your ass as he slams you down a bit harder, his cock bottoming out inside you, deliciously deep. you cry out, the sound ragged, and he exhales a soft laugh. âmm, there you go. thatâs the spot, huh? poor thing, no wonder you were on edge all day. needed this, didnât you?â
âi know,â he soothes, kissing the corner of your mouth. âbeen needing me all day, huh? now look at you. shaking all over me, so full you can barely think.â his words coat you, syrup-sweet and a little cocky, thickened by that hum in his chest. âyouâre doing so well for me, sweetheart. so good. my perfect little thing.â
his hips start to meet the motion of his hands, slow power behind every thrust as he lifts and drops you, fucking up into you from below while he guides you down from above, his control absolute. your body can only follow where he puts you, muscles too weak and mind too foggy to do anything else. every stroke grinds into that tender, desperate place inside you, the pressure winding higher and higher, unbearable and exquisite all at once.
you can feel it building, hot and tight, your toes curling, thighs spasming around his hips. you try to warn him, but all that comes out is a breathless, choked, âerling, iâmâiâm gonnaââ before another moan tears itself from your throat.
his eyes sharpen, mouth curving in that slow, satisfied smile that always makes your stomach flip. âyeah? youâre close?â he murmurs, breath fanning your lips. âof course you are. youâve been ready for me all day, haven't you?â he adjusts his grip, one hand sliding from your ass to your lower back, forcing you down harder as he thrusts up, changing the angle just slightly.
with that, white-hot pleasure detonates through your body, your vision going hazy at the edges as your mouth falls open on a silent scream. your walls clamp down around him so tight it almost hurts, your whole body seizing, every muscle tensed and shaking. youâre vaguely aware of the noises youâre makingâhigh, desperate, almost brokenâand the way youâre clinging to him like youâll fall apart if you let go.
âthatâs it,â he groans, voice still maddeningly gentle even as his thrusts turn rougher, chasing you through the peak. âthere she is, thereâs my good girl.â he holds you down fully on him, grinding in deep, not letting you run from it as the orgasm tears through you, wave after wave crashing, leaving you helpless in his hands.
you try to pull back, too sensitive, hips jolting, but his grip holds you firm, careful and unyielding. âshh,â he purrs, nuzzling your temple, his lips brushing your damp skin, âiâve got you. i know itâs a lot, i know. just breathe for me. youâre doing so well.â
your legs are jelly, trembling uncontrollably where they bracket his waist. every tiny movement sends aftershocks through you, clenching around him again, and again, until youâre sobbing quietly into his shoulder, overwhelmed and floating. he eases the pace, keeping himself buried deep, rolling his hips in slow, controlled circles that wring every last drop of pleasure from you.
he holds you there, trembling and spent, as he chases his own end. his breathing goes ragged against your neck, his hands tightening on your body as he groans, low and broken. you can feel him pulse inside you, thick and hot, and he buries his face in the curve of your shoulder with a sound that makes your chest ache, so raw and open for you. his hips still, pressed flush against yours, and for a moment neither of you move, just breathing together, his heart hammering wild under your palms.
"come here," he murmurs after a long silence, voice rough and warm. he lifts you off him carefully, like you're made of glass, and rearranges you both on the bed in one fluid motion, pulling you into his chest, his arm hooked heavy and secure around your waist. his nose nudges your hair, breathing you in, and he hums, long and satisfied, the sound rumbling through his whole body and into yours. "my perfect girl," he whispers against your scalp, lips lingering, "did so well for me. always do."
you can't respond, not really, just nuzzle closer, pressing your face into his warm skin, legs tangling with his. every muscle in your body feels like it's been unwound, all that coiled tension from the day finally, blissfully gone, replaced by a heavy, golden looseness that sinks into your bones.
his fingers trace lazy patterns on your hip, his breathing evening out, and the last thing you register before sleep pulls you under is the press of his lips to your forehead, the mumbled "so proud of you" against your skin, and the impossible, grounding warmth of him wrapped around every inch of you.
Self indulging but Iâm a little feral for fics involving ovulation đ imagine ur ovulating and all u want is ur big Blondie boyfriend to make you shake and come and cry all night but FUCK heâs being so responsible with his condom even though youâre whining about wanting it raw!!! Is my mic on??? đ¤đ¤đ¤đ¤đđđđ
hi sorry to be a pain but how regular will the sugar daddy updates be
Iâm on vacation for a week starting Sunday and then I have 2 more weeks of summer and I have to go back to Uni where I unfortunately have 5 classes this semester đđđ plus a job and the gym and such so itâs looking bleak guys
BUT IM GONNA TRY MY BEST ! Iâll aim for 2x a week so itâll take abt 2ish months
Part of the SUGAR, PLEASE. series. Accompanying SMAU here
word count: 7159
warnings: alcohol, nothing else really
notes: this one is so boring i'm sorry, it's just a bunch of exposition basically so we can get to the juicy stuff later! the way of how u guys got in contact and started texting is purposefully spotty so i wouldn't bore you with it lolz.
you are forty-three pounds into your overdraft, the milk in your fridge is one warm afternoon away from turning, and your landlord has slipped a note under your door that says, in the rounded, untroubled handwriting of someone who has never been poor, that rent is due monday with no extensions.Â
this is the london you know: grey light pressing against the windows, the radiator clicking like itâs trying to cough up a lung, and a low, constant panic that hums behind your teeth every time you open your banking app. so when marnie texts you at half past six on a thursdayâi know a guy. drinks?âyou say yes before you ask what kind of guy, because she always buys the second round and you have not eaten since yesterday morningâs toast.
sheâs already at the pub when you arrive, tucked into the corner beneath the stained-glass lamp, one leg crossed over the other, tapping away at her phone with nails the color of dark cherries. marnie works in sports pr, which means she spends her days managing the disasters of very large, very rich men and her evenings looking like someone who has never once worried about a gas bill. she sees you before you see her and raises a hand, her gold bracelets sliding down her wrist.
âyou look tragic,â she says, by way of greeting.
âthanks.â you slide into the booth across from her and immediately steal the bowl of nuts from the center of the table. âi look tragic because i am tragic.â
âyouâre not tragic. youâre just... down,â she waves the barman over and orders you both glasses of white wine without asking what you want. âand that, my love, is what i want to talk about.â
you narrow your eyes. âis this pretty woman?â
âgod, i wish. my life would be so much easier if i were julia roberts.â the wine arrives, and she pushes one glass toward you, then leans in with the particular intensity she gets when she is about to sell something. âokay. so. i know a guy.â
âyou said that.â
âa specific guy. a footballer.â
you stop with the glass halfway to your mouth. âa footballer.â
âyes.â
âas in, kicking a ball around for millions of pounds.â
âthatâs the one.â
you set the glass down. âmarnie, if you're about to ask me to be your wingwoman again, i swear...â
she laughs, loud enough that a man at the bar glances over. âitâs nothing like that. heâs a client-adjacent person. friend of a client. twenty-six, plays in the premier league, recently single, absolutely not interested in dating anyone properly. but heâs lonely in the way that people who live inside a schedule get lonely, you know? he wanted company. someone to fly out on off days, have dinner with, stay over. someone whoâs there.â
you pick up the wine again and take a longer sip. the pub is warm, and the wine is cold, and for a second you let yourself imagine a life in which any of this could possibly involve you. âand he came to you?â
âhe didnât come to me. he was drunk with a group of us after a match last month, complaining about being lonely and the fact that every woman he meets either wants a selfie or a ring on her finger, and he said something like, i wish i could just pay someone to keep me company, and i thought, well, thatâs easily arranged.â
âyou thought that was a business opportunity?â
âi thought it was a you opportunity.â she reaches across the table and squeezes your hand. âyouâre broke, you hate your temp job, youâre too smart for the life youâre living, and you have the patience of a saint. heâs sweet, i swear, absolutely lovely. heâs not one of the nightmare ones.â
you lean back in the booth and fold your arms across your chest. âmarnie, you are aware that you are describing prostitution.â
âno, iâm not.â she takes a sip of wine, unbothered. âiâm describing a very wealthy, very busy, very lonely man who wants to pay for companionship. thereâs a difference.â
âis there?â
âyes. one of them is illegal and depressing. the other is taxable and depressing, if you want to be cynical about it.â she grins at you over the rim of her glass. âwhich you do. you love being cynical.â
âiâm a realist.â
"potato potato,â she softens, setting the glass down and reaching across the table to squeeze your wrist. âlook. i would not offer this to you if i thought it would hurt you. i know him. heâs not one of those men who gets off on having power over someone. he genuinely doesnât have time for a relationship and he genuinely hates the circus of dating. his last girlfriend couldnât handle the schedule, the travel, the press. he wants something simpler.â
you turn your wine glass in slow circles, watching the pale liquid catch the lamplight. âdoes he know youâre asking me this?â
marnie hesitates. it is the first time you have ever seen her hesitate, and you find you do not like it. âwell,â she says carefully, ânot exactly.â
âjesus, marnie.â
âwait. wait.â she holds up both hands. âhe said it, drunk and miserable, and i filed it away. iâve been thinking about who i know who would actually suit him. you. i thought of you. but no, i havenât mentioned your name to him yet. that would be insane. i wanted to talk to you first.â
âso your plan was to find me a sugar daddy without asking either of us?â
âyes,â she says, unashamed. âand if you say no, i never bring it up again, and you go back to being tragically broke and i go back to managing athletesâ scandals. but if you say yes, i approach him. properly. i say, remember that thing you said? i know someone. sheâs smart, sheâs private, she has her own life, and she might be interested. and if he says no, itâs done.â
âand if he says yes?â
âthen you fly out for a weekend. all expenses paid. nice hotel, nice dinners, and a conversation about expectations and boundaries and money, because contrary to what you think of me, i am not sending you into some victorian novel. you meet him. you see if you like him. you see if you can stand him. if either of you wants to walk away, thatâs the end.â
you press your thumb against the stem of the glass. âis this a sex thing?â
marnie snorts. the sound is loud and inelegant and exactly why you like her. âwell, probably. heâs twenty-six and incredibly fit and he hasnât had a girlfriend in months. heâs not flying a woman to a five-star hotel to lose at monopoly. but itâs notââ she lowers her voice, leaning in, ââitâs not that. itâs not a transaction per fuck. i think he wants a certain type of... situation. he wants to spoil someone. he wants to come back from training and have someone there who is actually glad to see him and not because heâs famous. the sex is part of it. it would be weird if it werenât. but itâs not the point.â
you finish your wine in one long swallow. the pub is filling up now, the after-work crowd pressing in with their coats still on, laughing with the bright, exhausted relief of people who can afford to be tired, and you feel very still in the middle of it, like the eye of something.
âshow me a picture,â you say.
marnie already has her phone out, already scrolling. âhere. this is from a dinner last month.â
she turns the screen toward you, and you look at a man you know. everyone knows him. even if you do not follow football, you have seen that face on billboards, in adverts, looming out of airport television screens. blond hair pulled back from a high forehead, a nose that looks like it's been sunburnt recently, cheekbones that could cut glass, and blue eyes so pale they look almost colourless in the flash. he's smiling, a big, cheesy, genuine smile which seems out of character to how he was just described to you. his shoulders fill the frame, and he looks like a completely different species from you.
âerling haaland,â you say.
âyes.â
âerling haaland wants a sugar baby.â
âerling haaland wants you,â marnie corrects. âor he will, once i tell him about you.â
you stare at the picture. you think of your overdraft. you think of the milk in your fridge. you think of the note under your door, and the temp job where they make you scan files for eight hours while the fluorescent lights hum, and the fact that you have not left london in two years because leaving costs money. then you think of this man, this huge famous man, sitting somewhere in a hotel room with his schedule and his money and his specific, scheduled loneliness, wanting someone to have dinner with.
âheâs not weird?â you ask. ânot formal? not one of those men who reads you a contract by candlelight?â
âheâs the opposite of formal. heâs goofy. heâs sweet. heâs too big for every chair and he eats like a horse and he has absolutely no filter. heâll probably say something horrifying within the first ten minutes and then look genuinely confused when you donât laugh.â she puts her phone down. âhe needs someone steady. youâre steady. thatâs why i thought of you.â
you look at your empty wine glass. you look at the pub, at the warm lights, at marnieâs face, hopeful and certain and slightly drunk. you think of all the ways this could go wrong, all the ways it could humiliate you, all the ways it could turn into something ugly and transactional and small. you think of the ways it could go right.
âokay,â you say.
marnie blinks. âokay?â
âset it up.â
for a second she does nothing. then she grins, that wide, delighted grin that has gotten both of you into trouble more times than you can count, and picks up her phone. âiâm texting him right now.â
you watch her thumbs move across the screen, watch the little message bubble appear and float out into the night toward a man you have never met. your heart is hammering against your ribs in a way that has nothing to do with fear and everything to do with the terrifying, sparkling possibility that your life is about to change shape.
marnie sets the phone face-down on the table and raises her glass. âto new beginnings,â she says.
you clink your empty glass against hers because the barman has not brought the next one yet, and you both laugh, and a moment later her phone vibrates against the wood. marnie picks it up. her eyebrows rise. she turns the screen toward you.
âhe says,â she reads, âokay. tell me about her.â
the receptionist squints politely at her screen, fingers hovering over the keyboard in that way that already tells you thisâs about to be awkward.
âand your surname again, miss?â
you repeat it, slower this time, spelling it out over the low murmur of conversations and the soft roll of suitcase wheels on marble. the lobby is all beige stone and tall glass and soft, expensive-looking armchairs occupied by men in suits checking emails and a family arguing quietly over whether theyâve left something in the taxi.
the receptionist taps, frowns, taps again. âiâm not finding a reservation under that name. are you sure itâs today?â
your stomach does a slow, unpleasant turn, even though this was always going to be the worst case scenario only in your own head and not in reality. âyeah, itâs today,â you say, shifting your weight from one foot to the other, fingers tightening around the handle of your carry-on. youâre suddenly very aware of your nails, chipped and unmanicured, and the fact that your coat has a missing button. âhe said it would be in my name.â
âdo you perhaps have a confirmation email?â she asks gently.
you fish your phone out of your bag, swipe through your inbox, and remember that no, you donât have a confirmation email because you didnât book this. he did. from a phone number that appeared on your screen three days ago with a simple hi, itâs erling and has lived in your contacts since as a full legal name situation, erling haaland
heâd texted the itinerary over himselfâflight number, departure time, terminal, driverâs nameâwith the same blunt efficiency heâd used in every message since youâd agreed to come.
youâd replied with something that tried very hard to sound relaxed and not like you were rereading every word ten times. aside from that short run of messagesâtimes, addresses, a âhave a good night, talk tomorrowâ thrown in once when youâd checked in to say youâd got your boarding passâyou havenât really talked. no phone calls, no long late-night chats. just his name in your notifications, brief and steady, like calendar reminders.
âum,â you say to the receptionist now, scrolling uselessly. âcould it be under⌠someone elseâs name? he was arranging it.â
she gives a professional little smile, the kind people in expensive hotels have perfected, halfway between indulgent and noncommittal. âwe can try, of course. whatâs the other name?â
you stare at the polished counter, at the glossy hotel logo inlaid under the glass, and feel ridiculous even as you say it. âerling haaland.â
something flickers across her faceârecognition, amusement, that quick schooled-away twitch of a football fan at work. she doesnât comment, just types, and the seconds stretch out, long enough for heat to crawl up the back of your neck.
then her eyebrows lift a fraction. âah. yes. i do see a note on mr haalandâs suite booking.â she scrolls, eyes moving quickly. âthereâs an additional guest authorised to check in under his reservation.â she looks up at you properly then, gaze flicking over your travel-creased clothes and your slightly frazzled expression, and her smile turns real. âthat would be you.â
you let out a breath you didnât realise you were holding, the sound coming out as a quiet, shaky laugh. âthatâs me,â you say, resisting the urge to apologise to her, to the lobby, to the entire building for wasting their time by existing.
âif i could just see some id, please.â
you hand it over with hands that arenât quite steady, and while she scans it, you let your eyes wander around the lobby, taking in the towering arrangement of white flowers on the central table, the hushed efficiency of the staff, the faint scent of something floral and expensive threaded through the air. this is several universes away from your flat in london, with its drafty windows and uneven floorboards and the neighbourâs music bleeding through the wall like a steady headache.
âhere you are,â the receptionist says, sliding a keycard across to you in a little embossed wallet. âyouâre in the presidential suite on the eighteenth floor. breakfast is included and served from six until ten-thirty in the brasserie, or you can order it to your room at any time. the spa is on level three, pool and sauna open until nine. thereâs also a note here that any incidentals during your stay will be charged to mr haalandâs account.â
you try not to gape. âany⌠incidentals?â
âyes.â she smiles again, a tiny knowing thing that makes you wonder for a second what exactly she thinks you are to him, then seems to think better of it and returns to professional mode. âif thereâs anything else you need, just dial zero from the room phone.â
you thank her, tuck the card into your palm like itâs something dangerous and delicate at once, and wheel your suitcase toward the lifts, feeling the odd, weightless sensation you always get in dreams where things are going far too well for them to be real.
the lift is mirrored on all sides, which means you get to watch yourself ascend: hair slightly flattened from the plane seat, lipstick mostly intact but smudged at one corner, eyes a little too wide. you smooth your hands down the front of your jumper and practice an expression that looks like someone who belongs in a lobby like this, in a hotel like this, going up to a suite booked by a man whose entire existence youâve experienced so far through slow-motion replays and text bubbles.
the doors open onto a thick, plush carpet that muffles your footsteps as you follow the signs down a quiet corridor to the end, to a door with a brass number and a peephole and nothing else to mark it as different from any of the others. your keycard light flashes green on the first try, which feels like a small blessing, and then youâre pushing the door open and stepping inside.
the first thing you see is the window.
the entire far wall is glass, stretching from floor to ceiling, looking out over manchester in a soft wash of pale winter light. roads like veins, buildings stacked haphazardly in every direction, a hint of the stadium in the distance if you squint. the sky is that particular northern grey that looks almost silver when it catches, and for a moment you just stand there in the doorway with your suitcase crooked against your leg, staring.
then the rest of the room registers. thereâs a living area, for a start, an actual living room in a hotel suite, with two enormous cream sofas and a low marble table and a flat-screen television mounted opposite, already set to some hotel welcome channel playing generic piano music. on one side thereâs a dining table that could seat eight, laid with a bowl of green apples that look like theyâve been shined individually. the bed is in its own alcove, huge and perfectly made, all white duvet and a ridiculous number of pillows. thereâs a separate dressing area, a bar with crystal glasses, a coffee machine that looks more complicated than your entire oven at home.
you trail deeper into the suite, letting your fingers brush along the back of one of the sofas just to prove itâs tangible. your trainers sink into the thick carpet with each step, like walking on memory foam, and the air smells faintly of lemon and something warm, like cedarwood. someone has left a small folded card on the dining table with your name hand-written in looping black ink and a welcome message from the hotel manager; beside it, another envelope with haaland printed on the front in neat block capitals. you donât touch that one.
you roll your suitcase into the bedroom area and leave it by the wardrobe, then gravitate back toward the window as though thereâs a magnet in your chest pulling you there. up close, the city looks both smaller and more intricate, every terraced house and warehouse and office block slotting together into a pattern you canât quite decipher from this height. cars crawl along the ring road like toy models, people move as tiny dark specks on the pavements, and you press one hand lightly against the cool glass, feeling the difference between in here and out there with a clarity that makes your throat tight.
two days ago you were on your sofa in london in three jumpers, your phone buzzing with a message that had popped up while you were staring at your online banking, willing numbers to rearrange themselves.
aside from that, you really havenât gotten to know him. you know his stats and his face, the way everyone does; you know he uses too many full stops for a man with such a joyful game face; you know he hates trains and worries if youâve eaten and thatâs about it. the rest is all blank space youâve been filling in on your own, imagining his voice, his laugh, the way heâs going to look at you when youâre standing in front of him instead of on the other end of a screen.
itâs 12:32 now, according to the sleek digital clock by the television. heâd told you he had training this afternoon, but that he might be able to swing by the hotel before heading to the training ground if the schedule allowed, and if not then definitely dinner, booked for eight. youâd tried to sound casual when you texted back that youâd just be around, that youâd probably shower and unpack and maybe explore the hotel a bit, and heâd replied with a thumbs-up and nothing else.
youâre so wrapped up in replaying that last message, in imagining how this is going to goâheâll knock, youâll open the door, heâll be big and a little shy, youâll both laugh too muchâthat you donât hear the door open behind you over the muted hum of the air conditioning and the distant rush of the city, donât register the soft thud of footsteps on the carpet or the faint click as the door eases shut again.
youâre still staring out across manchester, hand on the glass, heart beating a strange uneven rhythm against your ribs, when a low, amused voice comes from just behind your shoulder, close enough that you feel the rumble of it before the words land.
ânice view, yeah?â
you jump, an actual little half-step forward that bumps your knee against the window ledge, your heart lurching up into your throat. a hand comes up instinctively as if you can ward off whatever startled you, palm splayed against the glass, and you spin around too fast, already flushing because of course itâs him, because who else would be walking into this room like he owns it.
heâs closer than youâd pictured, big enough that he seems to take up the space between you and the doorway entirely, shoulders broad under a pale grey sweatshirt, matching joggers slung low on his hips, the kind of thick cotton that looks impossibly soft. his hairâs pulled back in a loose tie at the nape of his neck, and thereâs a faint pinkness across his nose and cheeks that makes him look like heâs just come in from the cold. a black backpack is hanging off one shoulder, his car keys hooked around a finger, and he smells like outside air and clean laundry, the slightly sharp tang of deodorant rising under it.
his eyes flicker over you automatically, quick and assessing in a way that doesnât feel cruel, just curious, and then he winces a little, lifting both hands. âshit, sorry,â he says, accent thicker in person than youâve heard in interviews, rounder at the edges, the vowels softer. âdidnât mean to scare you. i thought you heard me.â
you let out a breath on a laugh that sounds too high, hand still pressed to your chest now instead of the window. âi⌠definitely didnât. youâre big, but youâre weirdly quiet.â
he grins at that, the corner of his mouth kicking up hard, something like relief sparking behind his eyes. âstealth mode,â he says, tapping his temple with two fingers. âvery dangerous. sorry.â he takes a couple of steps closer, careful and unhurried, and reaches out, one huge hand settling warm and solid on your shoulder, thumb rubbing an absentminded stroke through the fabric of your jumper as if to smooth away the fright. âyou okay?â
the touch grounds you in a way the room hasnât yet managed to, heat seeping through your clothes, the size of his palm almost ridiculous where it spans from your collarbone toward your upper arm. you inhale and nod, feeling your pulse begin to relax. âyeah. justâwasnât expecting⌠anyone. yet.â
his mouth softens, eyes dipping briefly to your chest where your heart is probably visibly trying to hammer its way out, then back up. âthatâs on me,â he says. âjust on my way to training. wanted to say hi before we talk tonight.â his thumb does another slow pass over your shoulder, like heâs reassuring himself as much as you. âhi,â he adds, voice a little quieter, almost shy underneath the steadiness.
âhi,â you say back, and it comes out breathier than you mean it to.
up close, heâs even more absurd than on television. thereâs a familiarity to his face thatâs uncannyâcheekbones, jaw, the exact angle of his nose from photos youâve seen hundreds of timesâlayered over with all the tiny human details you never get from screens: the faint stubble along his jaw where heâs missed a spot shaving, the tiniest of lines by his eyes when he smiles, the way his eyebrows are so light they feather off on the ends. his sweatshirt hangs comfortably on his frame but still pulls a bit at his chest and arms when he moves, hinting at the kind of muscle that doesnât really fit into clothes properly.
his hand lingers on your shoulder a beat longer, warmth sinking through the knit, and then he seems to realise heâs still touching you and gives your arm a light, almost absent squeeze before letting go. the room feels bigger and smaller at once when he steps back a little, giving you space while still somehow filling your entire field of vision.
âyou found it okay?â he asks, glancing around the suite like heâs checking the work, like he personally assembled the place. âthey didnât make it weird downstairs?â
you huff out a small laugh, tension easing another notch. âi tried to check in under my own name and they looked at me like iâd made the whole thing up.â
his mouth curves, a flash of teeth. âyeah, thatâs my fault. i forgot to tell them to put it in your name. i remembered the note, though.â he nods toward the dining table, where the envelope with his surname still sits. âthey were texting me like, âsir, thereâs a guest arriving, what do we do,â like it was some kind of crisis.â
âand you told them⌠what, exactly?â youâre suddenly aware of the receptionistâs little knowing look and feel your cheeks heat again.
he shrugs, one shoulder lifting under the soft grey cotton. âthat youâre staying here for the weekend and they should be nice to you.â his gaze comes back to you, steady and open. âthatâs all.â
thereâs something disarming about how simply he says it, no wink, no suggestion, just a fact laid down between you. heâs watching you properly now, taking you in without rushing it, and you have to fight the urge to fidget under the attention.
âyou lookâŚâ he pauses, searching for the word, lips pressing together for a second. âgood,â he decides, but thatâs clearly not enough for him, because his face brightens and he corrects himself. âyou look really good. the pictures your mate showed me donât do you justice.â
your brain snags on that, on the idea of him looking at your photos, and youâre abruptly aware of every choice you made getting dressed this morning, every doubt about whether your jeans were too casual or your jumper too plain. âthanks,â you manage, your mouth tilting in something thatâs half smile, half disbelief. âyou look⌠cozy.â
he barks out a quick laugh, eyes creasing. âcozy,â he repeats, like heâs trying the word on. he looks down at himself, at the sweatshirt and sweatpants, then back up with a self-deprecating little shrug. âthis is my uniform when iâm not in my other uniform. hope thatâs not disappointing.â
âitâs very on brand,â you say, and relax a little more when you see how amused he is by that.
for a moment you both just stand there, a few feet apart, the window at your back and the door at his, the space between you filled with all the conversations you havenât had yet. he shifts his backpack off his shoulder, drops it gently onto one of the sofas, and suddenly the room feels less like a show home and more like somewhere people actually exist in.
âi like that you went straight to the window,â he says, nodding past you. âfirst thing i did too, the first time i stayed here. you feel like god, looking down on the little ants.â
you glance over your shoulder at the sprawl of the city beneath the glass, then back at him. âyou feel like god a lot?â you ask, teasingly light, because itâs easier than admitting how surreal this all is.
his grin widens, but thereâs something a touch wry at the edges of it. âonly when i score,â he says. âthe rest of the time i feel like a very tall idiot running after a ball.â
you laugh, and the sound comes easier now, bubbles up from your chest without that brittle edge. he watches you, something pleased and a bit proud flickering in his expression, like heâs won a small victory.
âyou must be tired,â he says after a moment, glancing at the clock on the wall. âlong morning?â
ânot really,â you admit. âthe flight was short. i got here faster than i get to work most days.â
âgood,â he says, a hint of relief there. âi didnât want to drag you across the country and have you arrive half dead. did you eat? at the airport?â
you blink at the swift pivot into concern, then nod. âyeah. i got coffee and a⌠sandwich thing.â
âa sandwich thing,â he repeats, scandalised. âokay, weâll fix that later. proper food.â his gaze does another quick pass over you, like heâs checking for signs of actual damage, then he seems to remember his own timeline and shifts his weight, glancing towards the door. âi canât stay long right now, iâve got to be at the training ground inâŚâ he checks his watch, makes a small face, âforty minutes. but i wanted to see you. make sure you made it. that youâre⌠you know. real.â
âsame,â you say softly, and itâs true. text messages and screenshots and marnieâs stories all felt like a sketch; this is colour.
his eyes catch on yours at that, hold for a beat that feels a fraction longer than casual. thereâs a steadiness in him you hadnât expected, given the nature of what youâre doing here; he doesnât fidget or ramble or fill the silence, he just stands there, open and unhurried, giving you time to look back.
âyou okay being here?â he asks finally, voice lower. âthe hotel, the⌠whole thing.â his hand lifts slightly, then drops again, like part of him wants to reach for you and another part is reminding him you barely know each other. âif anything feels off, you tell me. today, tomorrow, whenever. i want you to be comfortable first, before we talk about⌠everything else.â
you nod, throat a little tight. âiâm okay,â you say. âitâs⌠a lot. but in a good way.â
he exhales like thatâs an answer heâd been hoping for. âgood.â the corner of his mouth tips up again. âand if it ever stops being good, we change it or we stop, yeah? no oneâs trapped here.â
youâre the one who looks away this time, briefly, suddenly worried he can see too much on your face. âokay,â you say. âdeal.â
âokay,â he echoes, and the agreement hangs there between you.
he steps past you then, moving toward the huge window youâd been standing at, and for a second you get the full scale of him in profile against the glass. heâs taller up close than you realised even a minute ago, the drape of the sweats doing nothing to hide the breadth of his back, the long line of his legs. he looks out over the city, hands going into the pockets of his joggers, his reflection faint in the glass.
âmad, isnât it,â he says. âall those people down there, and iâve seen maybe, like, ten streets properly.â
âyou donât explore much?â you turn slightly, shoulder almost brushing his arm now.
âseasonâs busy,â he says. âdays off, iâm usually sleeping or⌠going somewhere i canât be recognised, to be honest.â he glances sideways at you, a brief flash of sheepishness. âthatâs part of why i wanted this like⌠this. quiet. simple.â
youâre close enough to see the way his lashes cast little shadows on his cheeks when he blinks. thereâs none of the hollow, jaded distance youâd half-prepared yourself for; he looks tired in the way someone with a packed calendar is tired, but his eyes are bright, alert, fixed on you when he looks back.
âi should let you unpack,â he says reluctantly, glancing at the time again. âget settled, shower, whatever you want. order room service if youâre hungry. put everything on the room. donât feel weird about that.â he says it with such casual certainty that for a second you donât.
you hesitate, then, because this seems like the moment youâre supposed to say something about tonight, about dinner, about the conversations waiting for you on the other side of clinking glasses and dessert menus. âyouâre sure you donât need to, like, prepare or rest?â you ask. âi donât want to mess with your schedule.â
he shakes his head, a quick, decisive movement. âyouâre part of the schedule this weekend,â he says, like itâs obvious. âi train, i see you, i eat, i sleep. thatâs it.â thereâs that steadiness again, unflinching. âiâll text you when iâm done at the training ground about dinner. if you want to leave halfway through, you leave. if you want to stay an extra dayâŚâ he trails off with a half-smile, not pushing the thought, just laying the possibility between you like another small, safe bridge.
you donât know what to do with the little spark that flares in your chest at stay an extra day, so you tuck it away for later. âokay,â you say instead. âiâll⌠be here.â
he nods, satisfied, then steps back from the window, away from you, toward the door. the distance feels more noticeable now that itâs growing again.
âiâm really glad you came,â he says, hand on the handle, and thereâs nothing performative in it, just plain honesty. âi know itâs a weird ask. i appreciate it.â
you want to tell him itâs not like you had hundreds of better offers lined up, that your other plan for the weekend involved discounted wine and your duvet, but something about the way heâs looking at you makes you choose a different truth. âiâm glad i came too,â you admit. âi wanted to meet you. see if youâre⌠you know. as advertised.â
he laughs, sudden and delighted. âand?â
âand youâre very tall,â you say, deadpan.
that gets a proper grin, wide enough to change his whole face. âweâll work on the rest,â he promises. âiâll text you later.â
then heâs gone, the door closing with a soft click that seems too gentle for a man his size, leaving you alone in the huge, quiet room with the view and the echo of his handprint warm on your shoulder.
the restaurant is the kind of place with velvet banquettes and candlelight flickering off polished silver, everything soft and low and expensive in a way that makes you feel like youâve stepped into someone elseâs life. youâve spent longer getting ready than you care to admit, coaxing your hair into something smooth, reapplying lipstick until itâs perfect, slipping into the best dress you ownâsomething that always felt a little too much for anything you could afford in london, but here, under the golden lights, it feels almost modest. you catch your own reflection in the glass as erling ushers you to the table and, for a moment, you barely recognize yourself.
heâs already there when you arrive, standing up from the table so fast the white tablecloth flutters, a broad-shouldered silhouette in a crisp white shirt with the sleeves rolled to his elbows and the top two buttons undone, collar open just enough to show the line of his throat. his hair is tied back, a few strands escaping as always, and thereâs something about the way he grins when he sees you that makes all the nerves you brought with you dissolve like sugar in tea.
âyou lookâŚâ he starts, trailing off as his gaze sweeps from your shoes to your face and lingers there. thereâs a split second where he seems younger, almost shy, before the confidence returns. âincredible. i mean, really. wow.â
âthank you,â you say, smoothing your hands down the slip of your dress, trying not to look as giddy as you feel. âyou clean up pretty well yourself.â
he laughs, a bright, delighted sound, and beckons you into the seat opposite, his hand hovering at your back as you settle. the waiter appears like clockwork, pouring sparkling water, offering menus, and erling glances at you for a silent nod before ordering steaks, medium-rare for him, medium for you, two glasses of an absurdly nice red. when the waiter leaves, you both exhale, a shared release, and for the first time since you arrived, manchester feels a little less enormous.
conversation comes easier than you expected. he asks about your journeyâdid you like the view from the plane, how was the car, did you get any sleep last nightâand you find yourself telling him about the elderly couple you sat next to at the airport, about the little things that make up your every day. he tells you about training, about the new physio whoâs obsessed with stretching, about the team whatsapp group and the endless parade of memes. heâs funny, genuinely funny, and he listens like every word matters, blue eyes locked on yours in a way that makes something flutter low in your stomach.
you talk about everything and nothing, the hours slipping by in a haze of laughter and warmth, and by the time the steaks arriveâseared perfectly, pink in the middle, served with sides you canât pronounceâyouâve stopped thinking about the arrangement at all, stopped thinking about why youâre here or what youâre supposed to be doing. youâre just having dinner, and it feels real in a way you hadnât dared hope for.
he watches you take your first bite, eyes bright with anticipation. âgood?â he asks, and when you nod, sighing at the tenderness of the meat, he grins, pleased with himself. âknew this place was a winner. i donât get to go out much, but when i do, i want it to be worth it.â
you smile at him over your wine glass, feeling the warmth all the way down to your toes. âitâs definitely worth it.â
he leans back, stretching his long legs under the table. for a minute, heâs quiet, watching you with a look you canât quite read, something soft, a little searching, maybe even nervous.
then he clears his throat, setting his glass down with a little too much care. âso,â he starts, and the word hangs between you, heavier than anything else youâve said all night. âi should probably talk about, you know. the reason weâre actually here.â
you set your fork down, pulse quickening, but his gaze steadies you. thereâs nothing cold about him, nothing businesslike; if anything, he looks almost apologetic.
he keeps his gaze steady on you, the kind of open, attentive look that makes you feel seen in a way thatâs almost dizzying, and when he finally speaks, his voice is gentle but sure, no hesitation, no awkwardness. âiâve thought a lot about this,â he says, thumb tracing the rim of his wine glass, âand i donât want there to be any confusion, or anything that feels weird for you. i like youâmore than i was expecting, honestly. youâre clever, and youâre funny, and youâre beautiful, and i want you to know i mean that. i donât want this to be some cold⌠transaction. i want it to feel good for both of us.â
he leans forward just slightly, elbows on the table, focus unwavering. âi want to spoil you. i want you to feel looked after, not just because i can, but because it makes me happy to see you happy. that means nice places, good food, trips, giftsâwhatever you want, really. i donât want you to worry about whatâs too much or not enough. if you need anything, you just say. if you want to see me, you just tell me. i want you to feel like you can ask for things, and i wonât ever hold it over you.â
your cheeks burn, not from embarrassment but from the steadiness in his voice, the absolute lack of artifice. he watches the way you react, mouth curving in a little smile.
âas for the other side of it,â he goes on, quieter now, âif you want to sleep with me, iâd love that. i think youâre gorgeous. but you donât have to. not tonight, not ever, not unless you want to. i want this to be fun. i want you to feel safe. you say no, itâs no. you want to sleep in your own bed, or just talk, or just eat good food and watch movies, iâm happy with that. anything else is a bonus.â
heâs still leaning in, and his knee bumps yours under the table, a light touch, not accidental but not demanding. âi donât have a list of rules for you. i donât want you to perform, i want you to be honest, and iâll do the same. if youâre not comfortable or you want to stop, it stops. if you want to see someone else, thatâs your right. if you want to come with me to paris or stay in london because youâre tired, both are fine. iâm not going to keep score. i just want companyâyour company.â
he lets the words settle, his eyes gentle and so blue they almost look unreal in the low light. âwhatever you want from this, letâs build it together. i want to take care of you, but not control you. and if you ever feel weird, or itâs too much, or not enough, just say.â
he pauses then, waitingânot nervous, just open. âso, thatâs it. thatâs what i want. you, as you are. if you want me, too.â
you look at him, really look, and itâs impossible not to feel a little breathless. his hands are big and steady on the table, his jaw shadowed and strong, the open collar of his shirt showing the pulse in his throat. when he smiles, itâs soft, hopeful, almost bashful under all that composure.
you smile back, letting all your nervousness ebb away. âthat sounds⌠really, really nice,â you murmur, and he grins, relief and something like triumph flickering across his face. the world outside the restaurant windows blurs into darkness, but here, with him, everything feels like itâs all going to work out.