There were only two things Sorey regretted about going to sleep with Maotelus: leaving Mikleo alone for all those centuries, and never telling him about his feelings before he went to sleep. He didn’t want to burden his best friend with that, knowing what they had to go through and unsure of what exactly would transpire in the final battle. He hadn’t even been sure if they’d all survive the final battle, to be frank. He’d held out the hope, of course, but he knew Heldalf wouldn’t be holding back in that battle, as he had in previous battles. The relief when he’d seen the Seraphim’s lights, when he’d seen Mikleo’s light, had been overwhelming as he saw them spiral off into the sky.
He shook himself out of those thoughts as he heard his friend speak again, hearing how his voice broke like that. He held him close, pressing his body up against his warm back and leaning in to nuzzle into his soft curls. “You deserved better than me leaving you for centuries, so I will make it up to you every moment of every day.” He murmured, his voice low and gentle.
「mikleo laughed, the sound of it painful and bitter and weak. he shook his head, sorey’s words not really reaching his heart. he felt cold and numb despite his friend’s warm presence and that strong hold on him; like he’d been freezing over the years, no warmth in him ever again. there hadn’t been true joy for so long, his smiles having become fake just to not worry his friends-- the ones that were still there, anyway-- but no matter how good he was at those, at feigning to be okay, he couldn’t do it in front of sorey.」
“ ...--you can never make it up to me. ”
「he whispers,his answer, so resolute that there was no arguing with it. no matter how long sorey stayed with him, no matter what he did. that would be the reality sorey had to live with from now on. even if his friend would slowly melt under his presence, the pain was still there, deep down and out of his reach.」
“ you don’t know how it was... for you it was just a peaceful sleep, a little nap. ”
「and with that he sat up and pulled himself away from his friend, not able to stay like this any longer. there was too much heartache there to be that close again.」