you may be playing chess, but im eating the pieces

catch me barreling down the highway doing 95 on my razor scooter

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

I do whatever I want on this blog. it's just me standing on a box in town square spiraling and yelling at people about my latest manic episode, crash out, or mental breakdown (I got bipolar and adhd)

Ruairi, they/them

Dyslexic and bipolar

Pfp by @spookyteeth

[hqbeatles]

[miseryneverknows]

Holy fuck george

[themostimportantnight]

Britney Spears!

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

All I can think about is the beatles

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

Yall will call every trans person "they/them" expect actually non-binary people.

Yall will do anything to not see trans people as who they actually are then make and crack up at any joke at the expense of trans people

[cvpiid111]

my ed sent me to the ER. a cautionary tale.

tw: tmi, ed discussion

Not too long ago, I got really sick. I was in a pattern of restricting both food and fluids. Now, I've never been super skinny (even in times when i was fasting for 30+ hours regularly and eating <300-700 calories a day), so I thought I was immune to ed side effects (not sick enough mentality). I was wrong.

I wound up in the ER after 15 hours of extreme abdominal pain and vomiting. It was so bad I thought I had appendicitis. After some testing and a CT scan (the contrast material they injected me with was genuinely one of the weirdest drugs i've ever done), it was revealed that I was chronically constipated. Ew, right? I wasn't surprised though. I habitually restricted fluids and opted for high fiber foods to keep me 'fuller'. NAWTT a good combo y'all. Anyway, They basically told me I had hit my cap and i was throwing up because my bowels were no longer able to move. I was severely dehydrated.

Ummm so anyway. Moving forward. After that I felt like shit and was too sick to gaf about restricting. I just wanted to feel healthy and like i ought to be alive. So I started eating again. Three times a day. Absolutely horrifying, really my younger self's worst nightmare. at least it wasn't forced recovery. I gained a few pounds at first, then maintained. Apparently when you don't starve yourself, you don't get ravenously hungry and binge eat. But I'm actually kind of healthier now. Like, I have energy that didn't come from a can. It's sooooo weird to be posting this. I've been in self destruct mode for years.

I wouldn't say I'm 'recovered'. I still feel fat. I'm actually actively losing weight now.. but it's not controlling (I think it's just a byproduct of having a healthy digestive system and being active). My mindset has shifted to prioritizing health for myself. Soooooo lame ohmygawddd.

Anway y'all. ya girl's trying to be happy and has decided that she'd rather not miss out on things because she thinks she looks fat.

I will probs still be on edblr tho cos who gaf i do whatever the fook i want

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

Im on prescription laxatives because of how bad my stomach problems are 😔. But I have underlying issues that caused it, the disordered eating does NOT help.

And then the bloating makes me feel fat and gross.

I feel, and look, better when I eat healthy but sometimes I so nauseous I cant eat even when I want to 😞

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

Do we not know what criticism is🤨🤨

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

Did yall pass high-school english?

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

After seeing the "Jax transfem confirmed" spoiler and I definitely see why people see it that way.

So saying he was writing to be transfem it feels like the dysphoria was more just hating on women.

And my point of people ignoring abusive behavior still stands. Being transfem doesn't make you "babygirl" incapable of doing any wrong or harming any other woman or exempt from any abusive behavior.

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

Yall in the comments are literally proving my point of people ignoring and excusing abusive behavior in characters.

Im not talking about liking or disliking him, I dont like/dislike him, I just critical of his character and writing.

And yall are talking down to me, and like im illiterate, because im more critical of a misogynist abusive character then you

I see ware yall are coming from, and said that before, im just critical

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

"I have adhd so caffeine doesn't do anything for me."

Have you tried drinking more?🤨 I have adhd too and would die without coffee

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

After seeing the "Jax transfem confirmed" spoiler and I definitely see why people see it that way.

So saying he was writing to be transfem it feels like the dysphoria was more just hating on women.

And my point of people ignoring abusive behavior still stands. Being transfem doesn't make you "babygirl" incapable of doing any wrong or harming any other woman or exempt from any abusive behavior.

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

Its makes me uncomfortable that a lot if people in TADC fandom think the violent, misogynistic, incel is a trans woman.

I can kinda see why people who see themselves in him would make him a trans woman

But i feel like a lot of yall are "babygirl-ifing" him, and are completely ignoring all of his abusive behavior to justify your head canon and its weird.

Its weird that so many of yall will refuse to see a violent misogynist as a violent misogynist. and will completely ignore, excuse, and laugh at abusive behavior.

Genuinely how do yall not see him as an insecure little man.

Like, I also relate to him, your supposed to relate to him. But he isn't *a babygirl misunderstood trans woman*, hes a weirdo insecure man that takes it out on women.

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

I look so cute today

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

"I really wanna pictures with jony depp"

😧😨😰

[goth-queen]

[cvpiid111]

i’m brewing my own cider rn and once it’s done i will definitely NOT be freeze distilling it to concentrate the alcohol… that would require a permit or smth so like i said i’m NOT gna be doing that

[wasted-potential-posters-child]

Bro are you gonna share 🤨