Taken at Stan Hywet Hall and Gardens
Claire Keane

roma★
macklin celebrini has autism

⁂
Stranger Things
Three Goblin Art
we're not kids anymore.
$LAYYYTER

if i look back, i am lost
hello vonnie

Andulka
AnasAbdin

Kiana Khansmith

PR's Tumblrdome
almost home

titsay
🪼
dirt enthusiast

Love Begins

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

seen from Argentina

seen from United States
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seen from United States
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seen from United States
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@wayward-detective
Taken at Stan Hywet Hall and Gardens
Photo taken at Stan Hywet Hall and Gardens
“no homo” I whisper as I look at my garden of pea plants. The progeny had expressed a 1:2:1 ratio of phenotypes. I am Gregor Mendel.
This joke is lethal
Concept: Some jackass shows Bucky how to make a blog and it becomes really popular. Not because it’s the blog of James Buchanan Barnes, American Legend, War Hero, Infamous Assassin, Alleged Terrorist. Nobody even knows it’s his blog. It gets really popular because people think it’s a really great shitpost generator or something. Because Bucky is just a Weird Fucking Person and everything he posts on his fucking personal blog comes off as somewhere between dril and Jaden Smith and people are like “this is some quality garbage right here” and thus Accidental Memelord Bucky is born.
Bucky posts things like
“What is wrong with bananas. I ate a banana today and it was Wrong. America why”
“Every time I put on my eye makeup it gets bigger. My whole face is eyeliner now.”
“Why does friendship feel so much like punching”
“When I wake up in the middle of the night I am either thinking ‘who am I? does my life have meaning?’ or “did I already eat all of the plums?’”
“Why are you so grumpy” they ask me. they do not realize this is just my Face.”
“I know i said i would give my left arm for a cup of coffee but i am more awake now and i would like my arm back please”
“I guess I must have done something horrible in a past life. I mean. I definitely did something horrible in this life, so. “
OMG I LOVEEEE
YEEESSSSSSS!
“Guy in front of me won’t move his car seat up. I think that might still be upset about all those times I tried to kill him.”
“Got lectured by a guy who had been complaining about how things were Back In The Day. I don’t understand why he got upset. I too lived through the Great Depression and was drafted for the War.”
“The economy in this century sucks. Who exactly though another Stock Market crash was a good idea?”
“Apparently, it was Rude™ of me to pitch in my two cents on a conversation I happened to overhear, despite agreeing with them. On an unrelated note, I am no longer allowed in the ceiling vents.”
“‘If you don’t behave we’ll send (mutual) after you.’ Jokes on them. I’m the one who trained them to be an assassin in the first place.”
“Tried to buy a Chicken Dinner candy bar at the supermarket today. Turns out they were discontinued 54 years ago. Super bummed.”
“Wait. People were on the moon?! We got into space? There is a way off of this rock?! Why am I only just hearing about this?!”
“'Have you been living under a rock the past 50 years?’ No I was cryogenically frozen for 70. I don’t appreciate your tone young man.”
“My friend likes convincing people that I’m the Reckless one in our friendship. As if he won’t find an alley behind a bar to pick a fight in if I take my eyes off him for two seconds.”
“Why would i want to get a haircut when instead I can look like i just returned from a 12 year jaunt in the wilderness every time i grow a beard”
“was having a hard time finding noodles in the grocery store & asked a clerk for help. she looked at me like a crazy person. lady, it’s not my fault you don’t speak russian”
“what kind of idiot thinks dancers are sissies? literally every ballerina i have ever met could kill an adult man with just her legs”
“today i discovered Conditioner. the future is a miracle and my hair like a cloud now”
“apparently just jumping on to a moving bus when you are running late is not a thing people do anymore. please stop yelling at me.”
“went to a club last night to see what the hip kids were into. apparently the latest thing is just having sex standing up with your clothes on in a room full of people.”
“on the one hand, people dressed much nicer in the 40s. on the other hand, yoga pants.”
“rode in a car with heated seats today. it is my house now. i live here.”
“i have acquired a small bear. i am putting a collar and leash on him. he is my dog. no one tell animal control”
“i am working on this whole Good Guy thing but anyone who cuts me in line at starbucks deserves to have their kneecaps shot out okay”
“why did they have to make escalators so terrifying to get on and off of? from now on I’m just jumping off the mall balconies. none of this awful moving teeth staircase”
“i don’t care if it’s a ‘priceless historical artifact,’ punk, i didn’t wanna do the dishes and it makes a pretty good spaghetti bowl”
“hoodie pockets are so great. i can fit like three sandwiches and a grenade in there and my hands are still warm”
“i really though we would have flying cars by now. the future is such a letdown.”
“changed sam’s ringtone to jesus take the wheel.”
“do you know that feeling when you go to lean on your short friend’s conveniently arm-rest-height shoulder but you forget they had a huge growth spurt and you just awkwardly lean your elbow into the middle of their bicep”
“i swear i didn’t know your girlfriend was coming over. i always ominously clean my assault weapons on the coffee table like that. it had nothing to do with you.”
Fic: *has major character death warning*
Major Character: *dies*
Me:
normal people: yeah i saw spider-man: homecoming! it was really good!!
me: I'VE SEEN IT 3 TIMES ALREADY AND STILL WANT TO SEE IT AGAIN AND TOM IS A SMOL BEAN WHOM I LOVE AND NO ONE CAN TELL ME OTHERWISE AND BOW DOWN CAUSE SPIDER-MAN IS A FRIGGIN ADORKABLE LIL MUNCHKIN!! FIGHT ME ON IT BOIIII
Well Dean’s been an expert on closets since September 18th, 2008
It’s official. Stark.exe has stopped working. I broke him.
But on a different note: HOMECOMING WAS SOOOO GOOOD??????? I’ve found my favourite Spooderman! There were so many great moments in it, Tom was a fantastic actor, and the writing and story were well-paced! Gonna go watch it a second time!!!
*Grabs a mic*
bOys aND GIrls oF Every aGE
*puts on witch hat*
WON’t yOu liKe tO SEe SometHinG StranGE
*climbs on table*
ComE WITh uS ANd yOU wiLL see THIS Our toWn Of HallOWEEn
*rips open t-shirt*
THIS IS HALLOWEEN THIS IS HALLOWEEN
*burns down a patch of pumpkins*
PUMPKINS SCREAM IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT
*viciously burns down house while pouring blood on myself*
THIS IS HALLOWEEN EVERYBODY MAKE A SCENE TRICK OR TREAT TILL THE NEIGHBOURS GONNA DIE OF FRIGHT
*runs down street screaming dressed as a monster*
HALLOWEEN HALLOWEEN HALLOWEEN
The mashup you never thought would work
Congratu-fucking-lations.
I would pay so much to have this as a ringtone I’m not even joking.
Why?????
The face I made while listening to this was so visceral I had to draw it before reblogging it
How…dare…
Ladies and gentlemen, some of the 100000 reasons why I will love the Lord of the Rings movies and the cast till the end of times.
You forgot that, while Sean Bean hiked up the side of a mountain every day because he was scared of flying, Viggo Mortensen joined him for the #Aesthetic
your friend group will gradually get gayer and gayer throughout the years
Nice things to whisper when hugging someone
-you smell different when you’re awake -please help me (then smile as if nothing happened) -soon -you have lovely skin, I can’t wait to wear it -your hair tastes like strawberries -tonight….you. -he knows, don’t go home. -I always knew you would die in my arms -every time I poop I think of you -no one will ever believe you -yessssssssssssss -I killed mufasa -I bet you didn’t feel me lick your ear -mother told me it would be like this
Gather around American boys and girls, it’s time to play “Is it fireworks or gunshots?”
oh my gdO CAN YOU DRAW GODZILLA MOMMA CARRYING LIKE A HUNDRED LIZARD BABIES ON HER BACK FOR TAKE YOUR CHILD (lizard) TO WORK DAY
oh SHOOT well i cant swing 100 but how bout
If I don’t always reblog this assume I am dead