Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD).- Anxiety Disorder in which an individual has obsessive thoughts, and is compelled to do ritualistic behavior in order to ease them.
What this means to me? Almost all the time, in situations where I can not get up to use the bathroom, fear embarrassment from getting up and leaving to use the bathroom, or situations in which my mind just tells me that there is no chance of me going to the bathroom at that moment (in the middle of long stories from friends or relatives, etc) I have to get up and go to the bathroom.
First my mind realizes the situation (as mentioned above)
Then i start to worry and overthink about the irrational thought that if I do not go to the bathroom now, I might pee myself (the physical feeling actually appears where I feel like I have to go to the bathroom badly, just through mind power)
my heart starts to race, my palms get sweaty, I get fidgety, and then BAM I have to get up and go to the bathroom
Did I really have to go? No...Did I even really make any pee? No....Do I feel terrible and mad about myself for having to do this? Yes...But was it worth it because I no longer feel anxious? TOTALLY!
sometimes too, along with many other OCD symptoms in people, I count while in the bathroom. My magic number is 9, so I count to 9 on the toilet, 9 times...Any more/less and I have to flush, get up, wash my hands, and then go back to sitting on the toilet to start the whole ritual over again.
Any Questions? Feel free to ask!
There is no single cause of OCD
Most symptoms of OCD include
Counting, Organizing and perfection, washing hands and body frequently, hoarding, checking (did I leave the stove on? Did I lock my car?), etc
The thoughts are INTRUSIVE! one can not simply just get rid of them, or keep them out. There are behavioral and cognitive ways in therapy to practice these techniques, but OCD itself can not just be let go of like that. We don't want the thoughts, no one wants those thoughts, but they push themselves into our mind. It is like mind rape, we say no, but it happens anyway!
There are some meds for it (usually SSRIs...aka depression meds)
IT TAKES UP SOOOO MUCH TIME...this is not just your everyday, "oh hmm I left for vacation, I hope I locked the doors"...but this is every 10 minutes, checking the door locks. For me..It is almost every 30 minutes in situations described above, where I have to use the bathroom.
We know the thoughts are irrational....at least most seeking help do...but there isn't much we can do about that, besides our compulsions to relieve the stress
our functioning...in social situations, school, work, home, family, relationships...is bad...OCD interferes with all of these situations (for me home is ok as long as no one wants to tell me a story, or straps me down and says stay there, or if I am not waiting for a delivery that I may have to get up and confront someone with fear of peeing right then and there).
OCD can CAUSE DEPRESSION! I mean think about it...these thoughts entering your mind, you having to do your ritual, missing out on fun things you used to love to do, because of this ritualistic behavior (for me I can barely go out and socialize becaue there HAS to be a bathroom, with no line, that I can reach at any time..otherwise my whole time out is spent in that bathroom line, and if there is no bathroom...forget about it). Now this interference...and distress..and anxiety...can lead to depression. I get so put down when I can't do things I love...
My Depression caused by OCD
I used to love going to all of my college classes...now I barely go to classes because the anxiety is just not worth it. I wake up sometimes and just feel like I don't want to go through the anxiety of the day, so I call out sick, and stay in bed all day. I have even made myself think I was sick truly, just to rid the anxiety caused by going out. I feel terrible when I do that, like a failure, so put down.
For social events...count me out. My boyfriend always wants to go to bars with me, do fun bf/gf things together, go out to eat, go to amusement parks, go to concerts, etc....do I want to do all of those things? HECK YES!...but the anxiety I get by doing those things doesn't make them enjoyable...I know I will be miserable...and being out on the occasion..my whole motive is just to get back inside the house...to relieve myself from this anxiety...
Some at home remedies: Meditation, eating right, exercising, yoga
Therapeutic remedies: Hypnotherapy, Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (my all time favorite)
Any questions? Anything I didn't go over or anything you want to know? please ask!
