Untitled

12 year project regarding my 20s

[welcometomy20s]

August 12, 2023

451 Days to Go

So, we are up to… four trials now? Could be more… could definitely be more.

To say the former president is cooked would be overreached but it wouldn’t be an un-sensible conclusion. The indictments are truly dire and much of it pretty public.

I have no idea when or if the trial will proceed like normal. I have no idea what would happen if the former president gets convicted and somehow goes to prison? Likely it would be far less, but whatever the outcome… well, that’s it. I don’t know the outcome.

Will the trial depress voting turnout or increase voter turnout? Will there be any violence, if so will it be major? Will the government act upon the violence more than it already has?

The facts seems to be clear, but the verdict still clouded in that unknown…

[welcometomy20s]

August 11, 2023

This is not a post.

Well, it is a post, but it's not a post in your traditional sense.

Somehow, I have skipped two days, not like I did not wrote a post, but I somehow just mislabeled the posts? It's too far to correct.

I am writing this bonus post to show that I might need to double up on my recap, because I might have accidentally doubled there.

I am now one day behind, or ahead, depending on what happened.

[welcometomy20s]

August 10, 2023

Some has said 2023 is to Nijisanji as 2020 was to Hololive and I do feel as though the comparison is too poor, honestly

Hololive’s crisis only lasted like four months and the crisis was resolved pretty definitively. And Hololive’s troubles were mostly external, while Nijisanji feels mostly internal.

Besides, Nijisanji is an older company who should have known better. Nijisanji has a lot of cards stacked against them to make themselves better. The problems are internal and they have existed for longer. It will be hard to get rid of the root. I sometimes wonder if it goes to the top.

My reference for the start of trouble was when Warabi, Meruto, and Roco’s archive disappeared, which would have been late September last year. I picked this date, not only because it’s an important date for me, but also because it coincides with when the decline in EN’s views were becoming very noticeable.

Things are looking up now. Mysta’s graduation would cleanse most things, and hopefully Hyona is the last ID to graduate in a while.

[welcometomy20s]

August 9, 2023

I am currently following Cory Doctorow - he has always been a guiding light, although faint, but I have been getting more interested since the tech industry started to go belly up.

Cory Doctorow seems to have a knack of convincing me away from my skepticism. I was at first skeptical of the propensity of interoperability but I have slowly been convinced that it is a path worth pursuing and I have been slowly understanding Doctorow’s description of Google.

To paraphrase, Google had one good idea but was unable to develop any good ideas beyond that initial idea so they had to acquire good ideas from elsewhere in order to survive.

In some sense, Google was simply a bungler. I always liked Google, although now the relationship has been worn down a bit, because I liked the workflow of Google. Its democratic experiments and the fact that they encourage their workers to pursue their own projects.

But now the two sentiments can be reflected - Since Google is bad at handling itself, they need their workers to create things on their own, so that they could acquire it in order to live. 

While Bell Labs was created to give Bell an edge over their competitors and new threats, Google Labs was created as a means of survival. They need to form as new ideas as possible, because as the graveyard shows, they are not good at keeping those ideas afloat.

[welcometomy20s]

August 8, 2023

My thoughts on this have greatly extended since I first wrote out this topic, so more on this later.

Few weeks ago, I wrote a series on finding alternatives. One of the inspirations was from a mental health video where the therapist was talking about abusive parents.

My thoughts grew from that video - I thought about parenting and its growing challenges and so on and eventually I thought about school as an alternative for parents.

I think when some parents say schools are groomers, they are referring to how schools take some control away from parents. By providing information about the world beyond the grasp of parents, children are free to explore alternatives.

I started thinking of schools as a safeguard for parents - less of a structured regiment and more of an academy where children are free to explore what they want to learn and explore.

[welcometomy20s]

August 7, 2023

Propensity for people to break contracts in the VTuber was a point I made a long time ago, and the second thing I find fascinating is how those rule breakers tend to have a good life.

There is an emotional tendency to reject all rule breakers as bad people, but once more, looking at the future, that it’s not really bad-ness.

At the worst, people might go on a fit, but they come out okay on the other side. Termination or something similar is dependent on the time and place more than the character of the breaker.

Asumi Sena did not leave on good terms at her previous stint, but she has been a somewhat reliable member of VSpo. Himemori Luna went from place to place but seemed to find a happy home in Hololive. Now, I’m not saying those previous companies were bad - although I did complain as such previously for both companies - but in my infinitesimal insight, more likely it was bad management or no one was at fault.

Finding a good agency is like needling a needle within a haystack. They are relatively rare and they are relatively hard to enter. I want to believe that one can reliably harness the firehose without much corruption but it’s a tall task.

[welcometomy20s]

August 6, 2023

One time in therapy, I described myself as a heavy object. It takes an enormous effort to push and the ball will push you back, due to Newton’s third law. But once the ball gets rolling, the ball will just wreck everything in their way.

There was always part of me that knew this. There was always a passive aggressive nature to my relationship with the world. I like to say I’m a coward, but really I’m more afraid of my courage.

Feels like boasting myself, but courage usually comes in haphazardly forms. Courage is more emotional than rational, and operating with a clear mind with all those emotions is a skill that takes decades to master and I certainly did not have that kind of training.

[welcometomy20s]

August 5, 2023

Anniversary: 100 Years - Death of a President

I was going to write about Warren G. Harding’s death and how would the death of a president affect the country… but I got sidetracked.

To me, who wins the election is an afterthought. The real contention is if Republicans are able to steal the election. Currently, I’m pessimistic about their chances. They need to control some key legislative chambers, but it is clear that if the legislature were to be at their control, Trump would have won the election anyways.

I guess getting back to my original intentions, death of our current president - a distinct possibility given the man - would throw a good enough wrench. It would be bad - best opportunity to seize power undemocratically from the Republicans - but can be good - can finally be a wake up call for Democrats even if it’s just out of sheer survival.

I really don’t know how the Kamala Harris government will shake out. How would Americans react to suddenly being thrusted into having a ‘blasian’ woman being the leader of the Free World? I honestly think Harris was one of the least influential vice presidential candidates, even though her chances of being president were relatively high. It was strangely unthinkable, or at least I didn’t think it crossed the minds of voters as much as it ‘should’.

Oh well, only 455 days more to go.

[welcometomy20s]

August 4, 2023

I recently read an analogy comparing video game fandom to fruit stand and I don’t think… it hold very well? To simply put, the analogy is that video game fandom tends to act in ideological ways that no other market does… that is true but the conclusion that the analogy is unthinkable is only true because it hasn’t happened yet.

What I mean is that video games tend to be the avant garde for this type of stuff and it shouldn’t be unthinkable that ideological burning of fruit stands can occur as polarization continues. I mean we are already close with Target, to me it’s a hop and a skip to the analogy bearing out.

I might write later about why video games tend to be the avant garde regarding hate…

[welcometomy20s]

August 3, 2023

If a 'creator' presents an image or scene or concept that appeals to fans in general, that wouldn't be what most people call 'fanservice', it'll just be called 'good practice'. And therefore fanservice is an intentionally exclusionary, satisfaction of a specific group of people, and we all know what group of people we are talking about.

Sexism is pervasive in anime/manga (and in video games!). What does that mean is that asymmetrical sexualization of women is almost baked into the perception of these two media. As many would rightly point out, there are plenty of anime/manga and video games which have none of this 'fanservice'. But those are not really ones people think of when they think of anime/manga and video games. Fanservice is the face of these two media and some would say... this has been the major detriment for success.

Anime and Manga actually have non-skeevy reasons for fanservice relating to its countercultural roots - I’ll get to that later. But let’s address the cynical reasons first. Especially in video games, to counter the family-friendly market cornered by Nintendo, companies like SEGA would appeal to young boys, but in a very prototypical way. While there is some truth to youths and teenagers being horny bastards, marketing wants to emphasize on this aspect, because they want to simplify the world in order to better manipulate the market, that’s their modus operandi.

This strategy prays on many strings of the patriarchy - the ‘fact’ that a boy will more likely have his way than girls, and that ‘his’ way would be inclined to the dehumanization of women. Both are highly skeptical if the patriarchy wasn’t in place… which is what makes feminist media criticism so frustrating - you kind of have to assume the conclusion to make the argument.

I wrote this some time ago that discussion around the decline of shoujo has an odd sense of defeatism, considering the arguers are usually huge fans of shoujo. They wholly assume (to a surprising degree) that men only want shonen and will not look at shoujo, but they usually skip out on the explanations, usually because the reasons are so trite… but it’s interesting here. Again, it’s almost self-perpetuating - men will not read shoujo, because only girls read shoujo and to read shoujo is to challenge masculinity, which is a big no-no. In a sense, men do not read shoujo because we believe that men do not read shoujo.

But this is clearly false. Whole bishonen-turned-moe art style that exemplifies modern anime was birthed through the cross pollination of shoujo manga on shonen manga after shonen manga ran out of creativity in the late ‘70s. With this hindsight, the talk of decline seems especially placed at the wrong time, since there is a strong case that a similar decline is happening now and we are seeing more shoujo tropes appearing in shonen manga.

Maybe it won’t be in the same presence as the bishoujo boom of the ‘80s, but the shoujo adaptation has been increasingly well-received and well-loved by more people. Even the increase of shonen romance might be an echo of the bishonen of the late ‘80s. 

There is increasing incline toward prude-ness in young people, probably as a reaction to the overtly sexualized media of the 90’s-10’s. One of the reasons I was writing about this topic was the minor but significant backlash over one of Hololive Summer M/V, which was a pastiche of those overtly sexualized idol M/Vs of the ‘90s. I’m not going to be all zoomer and denounce all nostalgia, but I would have to ask… Do we really want to reminisce about that part of the ‘90s? What does the decision say about who Cover wants to cater and how will they cater?

I think it’s partially due to the fact the most subscribed JP member is Marine of all people, but there is a large throwback nature to Cover’s recent approach, which is actually a narrow approach that would only harbor terrible people to your side.

A good time to bring the topic I put on hold. Right, counterculture’s influence on anime/manga is an important part of how anime/manga acts and is perceived. For example, to counteract the patriarchy’s worship of strong men, why not worship the opposite, as in a frail girl? Hence the creation of idols and the start of the lolita culture. Frail girl stands as the opposing ideal to the strong men and fascism that dominated Japan in the mid-20th century.

But there was an odd contention between the two. Perversification of ‘seiso’, you might call it. Instead of worshiping innocence as an opposing ideal to strength, some have a drive to worship innocence as a fuel for exploitation. Many Japanese media leaned on this corundum. Some forthrightly criticized the impulse, while others merely entertained the idea.

See how far you can go by replacing the talk of ‘woke’ with ‘resistance of exploitation’.

[welcometomy20s]

August 2, 2023

Problems for Greg Rutwoski

You cannot copyright a style of artwork, only the specific artworks a person has created. No matter what the right of AI art is directed, the above can be enforced through current practices.

This proliferation has the same problem as piracy. The only way to reduce piracy is to offer legitimate services that are more convenient than piracy. Of course, this is possible regarding online distribution but impossible with AI art, unless something like an official AI generator that can price a commission that would be given by the government, but like that’s going to happen.

Perhaps we must separate art from the artist regarding economics, by creating a direct payment to artists or something. Current copyright system is highly inadequate is an fact that everyone knows, so this must be overdue.

[welcometomy20s]

August 1, 2023

I was reminded of a tidbit that some internet expert wrote that we don’t realize how much we rely on tracking. We might not have a good feeling but we don’t think enough that things like recommendation/discovery and quote replies cannot be done without tracking.

That’s the trade off and I think people don’t realize this because corporations think people would be turned off by the making of the sausage, but I just they will to a large extent.

Doing discovery manually is a skill to get used to, but I think it’s a necessary barrier, which means Fediverse will always be on the backwater, and I think that is fine as well.

But again, things like Wikipedia doesn’t have tracking, as far as I know, and yet the site is perfectly suitable for discovery, so perhaps there are ways to get around tracking somewhat.

[welcometomy20s]

July 31, 2023

One of the common mistakes with pro-AI side of the AI Art ‘debate’ is applying the efficiency argument to something nebulous as art.

Pray, what does one mean by ‘art’ being better? Art has no absolute metric. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and therefore it will always be in our capacity to judge art, and therefore it has to be us who will have to drive for art.

It is humans who have settled for mediocrity, and therefore AI art will not improve unless we decide to put our heart… AI cannot magically play a beautiful song just as you cannot just a person to create comedy… effort is an universal concept, something that cannot be fixed by AI.

Biggest Achilles' heel for AI is that its drive is powered by laziness, or more specifically its hatred of effort and passion. The Spartan ethic is inherently faulty and only the few that are able to put the passion into AI will be the one to thrive.

So, AI might take over the art world but it just won’t be in the way most people think…

[welcometomy20s]

July 30, 2023

Hot Economy

There are two ‘sensible’ reasons a hot economy might have an adverse impact in society

First is that in a hot economy, there is a lot of job hopping to take advantage of the competition. But this means that workplaces have to spend extra not just to compete for new hires but to train and have them catch up to the current state of the company. This leads to poorer efficiency, more prominent in newer businesses.

Second is the famous wage-price inflation spiral. This spiral is caused by an imbalance in competition. If there is high competition for labor but low competition in price, producers can take advantage of the rising wages by raising the price, which can be usually absorbed by the newly rich consumer base.

Government can induce competition, or simply buy extra supplies, as they have done in the past during the New Deal. Price hike in dairy products 

apparently came from a sudden shutdown of a large dairy buyer, leading the dairy producers with a sudden drop in demand, which led to price hikes.

[welcometomy20s]

July 29, 2023

This month, I will be writing most of my posts on my phone. I’m inspired by the fact that I’m switching my workstation and from a character who used to write fanfiction with her phone.

The app is a little cumbersome but I think I will manage to cope with its idiosyncrasies by the end of this little experiment.

I will be modifying a bit on my main computer, whatever it may be, but most of my writing will be done with my phone. Let’s see if I can keep up.

[welcometomy20s]

July 28, 2023

VOCALOID LEGENDS - July 2023

#800 - Requiem (Kanaria) [Hatsune Miku]

Achievement Date: 23-07-03, Upload Date: 23-04-22

The VOCALOID version of the song originally sung by Hoshimachi Suisei. It’s a rare occurrence where I write a VTuber in a legitimate sense. I personally dislike Kanaria’s increasing use of Miku. I just like his GUMI songs more, fits his style better.

#801 - Super Nuko World (mafumafu) [IA, Kagamine Rin]

Achievement Date: 23-07-05, Upload Date: 13-12-20

IA and Rin duet is rare, and a cute VOCALOID is also uncommon, and of course it is part of mafumafu’s Nuko series, which is surprising that this is the first entry. Very much a mix of the fast-paced DnB that dominated ‘13 and the Denpa sound that is very much the backbone of Japanese internet culture. It’s a brilliant song and fun, too!

#802 - Baka (syudou) [Hatsune Miku]

Achievement Date: 23-07-08, Upload Date: 18-03-21

I think this is one of the songs that is better covered than listening to the original. Syudou tends to tune Miku very delicately, which does not fit with the overtly angry nature of the song. His tuning becomes better suited in later songs, however.

#803 - Whatever Yama Says Goes (PinocchioP) [Hatsune Miku, PinocchioP]

Achievement Date: 23-07-20, Upload Date: 18-08-20

There is this mix of anger and sadness that seems to really solidify at this time from one of the more prolific producers out there, but this song is especially angry and sad, and the producer’s own vocal only adds to the desperation and hopelessness.

#804 - Rabbit Hole (DECO*27) [Hatsune Miku]

Achievement Date: 23-07-22, Upload Date: 23-05-19

DECO*27’s 39th song on this list, a major milestone and one of the fastest of his on the list. Honestly, even with the recognition, I still think it’s underrated, mostly I think because the lyrics are extremely suggestive so there are few covers. I think there are many songs which try to mix and match, but this song play the fast pace straight, and I think I appreciate the simplicity and directness of the song. 

#805 - Scenery, Indulge in Summer (n-buna) [Hatsune Miku]

Achievement Date: 23-07-28, Upload Date: 13-08-20

What a perfect song to listen to in these current times. Another great summer song from one of the greatest summer songwriters. I’m not sure, but the song seems to be a reflective song connecting many of the other songs together. The brightness and emptiness of the song really reflects on the strengths of the producer and summer.

#806 - Mafia (wotaku) [Hatsune Miku]

Achievement Date: 23-07-29, Upload Date: 20-08-07

wotaku has finally started to rack up on this prestigious list and this might be his most famous song. One that basically exemplifies his style, although the producer moved onto different sounds. If you encountered the song through the covers, you might think Miku's light voice would not work, but I think it oddly suits well. 

#807 - -ERROR (niki) [Lily]

Achievement Date: 23-07-29, Upload Date: 10-09-13

One of the heavy favorites of cover artists and fans alike, the song took its sweet time getting onto this list. The song that brought niki into stardom and as a master of Lily. Honestly Lily almost feels too generic to really work, but I think niki uses this generic factor in two equally interesting ways, either as a background to an electronic bop or kind of a general cry for some topic, like death and dying in this song.

#808 - The Real Disappearance of Hatsune Miku (cosMo) [GUMI]

Achievement Date: 23-07-30, Upload Date: 15-07-29

What an odd song. First, this is a GUMI song, which is only the beginning of the pointed commentary in what might be one of the most direct song from the prolific produer who has been here since the very beginning. Honestly, it sounds more like a Neru/kemu song, which is kind of ironic because that particular style was fading out of fashion. 

[welcometomy20s]

July 27, 2023

Posts this week have been short for various reasons.

Not just the fact that I just want to be in the mood for shorter posts, mostly since it took a long time to write my posts this week, but this week was not a very fortuitous week for me.

There were various reasons why, and I still think I will make it out of the week okay, but let’s just say I had quite an overbearing roller coaster of emotions this week, and I just want to rest.

And rest I did, and rest I shall do until the work needs to be done once more.