Cosimo Galluzzi
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JBB: An Artblog!
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One Nice Bug Per Day
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Game of Thrones Daily
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
almost home
KIROKAZE
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@wellnessjourney
Anxiety
I am so anxious. I am in physical pain. I could drop in tears at any moment. I am overwhelmed. So much to do. No time to do it. I want to be better, give better and love better. I'm feeling tight in the chest and can not breathe. I want to sleep for days and cry for days. So much to do.
Stolen from PopSugar Snapchat
AromaTouch Certification today! Super excited to incorporate into our lives at home & work.
Mental Clarity. A hike in beautiful autumn crisp air and vents with a best friend. Now, I suppose I should be productive... I suppose.
Mental State
I'm happy and present. I'm relaxing. To be productive or no? I should probably decide yes. Always so much to do. I need to organize my thoughts and set up achievable steps to his my goals.
Sometimes, you just need a girls day with one of your best girls for mental clarity. ☕️🍂🍁😍
Anxiety
Sunday. My weekend with Alexa. My heart feels like it's going to explode. I feel like the odds are against me and it makes me so sad. Risking sounding like a little cry baby brat I feel like nothing works out my way. I'm constantly letting others who don't deserve it "win". I just am sick of the stress of trying to fit it all in. I'm sick of feeling so broke and depressed. My anxiety is pending doom. I know it's not doom... but it feels like it. I want a normal family. I want Alexa always. I want a baby to have home all the time. I want to be married. I want to have my family home life normal. I don't want to live with my drunk father in law. I want Luke to slow it on the drinking - a lot. I want to be healthy. I want Luke to quit smoking. I want to lose weight, I want to be strong. I want a raise, or to find a second job that will take me with my schedule. So, sounds like I almost want to trade all my circumstances.
✖ A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness ✖
Book Review on The Book Castle
Currently reading
Whole30
Day 26 and I caved. And I kind of feel guilty, but not really. Moving on... Better lifestyle. Moderation. Key. KEY. Enjoy life 16-20% of the time and the rest of it eat well. T25 for 10 weeks. Ready.
Whole30 Day 7.
Doing okay. Face is breaking out bad. Have had some headaches. Had two weddings yesterday. Might have had some bad ingredients when I couldn't avoid but otherwise right on track! Woot.
Stress relief Sunday. Yesterday was hard. In many aspects. My daughters dad and his wife are threatening me to and I don't feel as though I'm in the wrong since I only do things for Alexa. They hate me and the generosity I've given the past 9 years has been over looked. I stand up for myself to keep things fair for Alexa and myself and all of a sudden I'm being accused of not being civil. I call bullshit. It was my birthday. I got Luke a $1500 ice fishing mount coffee table. Honestly, I know it's stupid to have expected an engagement ring. But, I did. It's been 6 1/2 years... I want that commitment. I need that. And I don't understand why it a so hard for him to give...it Breaks my spirit. And he drank too much on my damn birthday and passed out. My birthday wasn't terrible but it was pretty darn close. Today I treated myself to a mani and now I'm at the gym getting my sweat on. Whole30 starts tomorrow. I'm excited to get this revenge body and life started. I will prevail and I will be successful.
Reminder. Breed love, feel love. Right? Ahhh I struggle
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOUUUU!!!!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!!!! Thanks for ruining my birthday you both are completely fucking heartless and only care about yourselves. I suffer and more importantly Alexa suffers you fucking selfish assholes. I can't stand either of you and I'm counting down the days until Alexa turns 18 and I never have to speak with either of you ever again. Fuck you mother fucking bitch asses.
Gone
I am so incredibly depressed. It's my birthday week and it sucks. I hate my birthday. I also got into a huge fight with Luke because we're not the same. I'm not happy. I'm not in a good place. He refuses to try. I'm upset. I miss Alexa so much it physically hurts. And her dad and step mom will not answer me to let me know if I can take her on my bday. I hate split time. I miss her so much. I just want to sleep till Sunday at 5:30 when I can pick her up.
Well..
Just realized that I'm starting the Whole30 and I have two weddings the following Saturday. This should be a good test of will...
Got help.
I'm so excited. I think I will finally be able to figure out what's holding me back. I decided to invest in Nutrition Response Testing. I really think I will get through the barriers keeping me from being healthy. Also, starting the Whole30 August 15th. Doing it again and hoping for better results!
