Save me from myself

My name is jack and this is just a place for me to vent, sorry if I offend anyone

[wewhowalkalone]

I broke a promise, I really am a fool

[wewhowalkalone]

I’m weird

So tonight I heard a bang in the kitchen and forgetting we had mouse traps set up in there, I went to check and I got there just in time to see the mouse twitching a bit before it died and I broke down and freaked out, what is wrong with me, like I know we have a severe infestation and it needs to be done, we’ve tried so many other options because I didn’t want to hurt them with no success and I’ve seen fucked up shit happen to humans and not batted an eye but seeing this mouse suffer for a few seconds caused something to snap inside me...

I’m a really strange human being and it’s not that I’m against that....I just want to understand why I am how I am and why things like this affect me so much, I really feel like I’m not human sometimes....if only it were so simple..

[wewhowalkalone]

Random venting

It’s a weird feeling to be genuinely disgusted and angered at humans as a whole, I’ve lost all faith in humanity I had and I can’t bring myself to trust anyone anymore, if I see someone save someone’s life all I think is that they must have had a selfish reason and even if they didn’t they’ll die young and stupid or be emotionally crushed and reduced to a selfish, hateful person....I’m only 23 and I’ve never truly suffered as many others have and yet I know there is something deeply wrong with me. I don’t know what I’ll become and that used to terrify me...but now? Now I welcome anything that might numb my pain, whatever the cost

[wewhowalkalone]

Broken

I can’t think straight, my brain doesn’t work like it should...I spent the whole night with this empty and yet tight feeling in my chest, the feeling I used to get when I cried....but I can’t cry anymore when my body needs it. The urge to cry hits me at stupid times, like I’ll drop a pen and boom, moments from crying....but I never do I just feel it coming but it never arrives. I’m loosing my ability to express certain emotions and I’m struggling to get my thoughts even remotely coherent, it’s just all white noise that I can’t differentiate between and I physically cannot sleep at night anymore, my body and mind are against me and I can’t handle this much longer

[brokn-soulll]

[wewhowalkalone]

god i want to cut so badly right now….fuck i hate what you have done to me

[wewhowalkalone]

no matter how much time passes, im still not okay…..

[wewhowalkalone]

…

[wewhowalkalone]

It's been more than a year since I've cut, I got better for a bit but now I'm worse than I've ever been and I feel the craving returning, the craving for just a few moments of peace and calm that only the blade has been able to bring me, I just want to be in control of my own emotions even if only for a moment, no matter the cost

[lonely-and--sad]

[the-moon-is-all-we-will-see]

[tokiobordell]

[wewhowalkalone]

Debates

Am I really so wrong for assuming that adults should be able to have a debate without making it personal?

[wewhowalkalone]

…

[unforgetable-words]

Sometimes I don’t have a choice

[wewhowalkalone]

I dreamt of you again

I dreamt of you again and I held you and told you how much I missed you and you all you said was "ssshhh" and immediately I knew it was a dream but I didn't want to wake up, I didn't want to return to a world where you hate me but I did and all I want is to return again....

[flirtygertie]

[ankle-beez]

this is way too fucking relatable