Being the newest addition to Negan’s collection of wives also meant you were the one that was gossiped about the most. It was common for you to hear whispers, rumors on what your old husband must’ve done to make you marry Negan. Some thought maybe it was even a punishment for something you had done. Did you piss Negan off and have your punishment be becoming one of his wives? Of course, he wouldn’t force you to do anything, it was all up to you on what your choice was in everything. He was a man all about consent. None of his other wives didn’t seem to ever think that you just wanted to marry the guy. Which didn’t make sense when you thought of Negan. Sure, he was an asshole to some, but, he was a good looking guy, and he could be sweet when he wanted to. Plus you get extra points to get things you wanted, it was like a win-win.
Though, it didn’t feel like a win-win when half of the time you were being ridiculed by the other wives. Before getting married to Negan, you always saw them cheering each other up, or just hanging out. They all seemed like they were sisters, they seemed so close. That’s what you wanted, to have a family, as weird as that one might be. But instead, you were given the opposite of what you saw. The girls didn’t show you any good intentions. In fact, the only time they gave you attention was if you were being talked about. Of course they never said anything straight to your face, but you knew that you were being talked about. It wasn’t like they tried to hide it, it was obvious.
The first night as Negan’s wife, it was time to consummate the marriage. You were nervous, but he was sweet. In fact, after the wedding (because of course Negan wanted a wedding, he did with his other wives, it was something he liked to keep from the normal world apparently), all you two did was sit and talk. It was weird. You sort of prepared yourself for weeks for this day, you didn’t know most of it would be talking for hours. But soon enough, talking led to kissing, kissing led to touching, and touching led to sex. Even though you liked Negan and you were attracted to him, you were still nervous. This man wasn’t necessarily the gentlest, and he didn’t have the nicest demeanor to him. So it was a surprise at how slow he took everything. How gentle he took things. It was like he cared for how you reacted to his touch, like he paid attention to the noises you made when you liked something. Something that you thought was just for him, turned to be something that was for the both of you, something you weren’t expecting that night.
You didn’t even have to have sex with him on that first night. You remember the moment clearly. He made sure you knew that you didn’t have to. “Just want to make sure you are one hundred percent comfortable… we could just talk all night, I’m fine with that too doll.” It made your heart swell, that he cared. Or at least, pretended to care. Either way, it was nice knowing that for the first night at least, he took things at your pace. He took care of your needs before his own. It wasn’t something you expected, but was greatly accepted.
You were snapped out of your first night trance. Oh what you would give to go back to that night. Sure you’ve had sex with Negan multiple times after that night, but that first night. That first night was what brought you close to him, it was slow, and passionate. As if he loved you. You loved him, you were sure of it, that’s what had to be giving you the heart aches whenever you saw him or were by him. Wait, right, someone needed you. You looked up from the drink in your hand. You sat in the corner of the room, your legs crossed as you sat up straight. The girl in front of you, her name was Emily, you think, one of his wives. She looked angry, her arms crossed over her chest, she wasn’t smiling. Damn you had to learn the other wives names, otherwise confrontation like this will be more awkward than it has to. You were expecting something rude about your hair, or the dress you chose to wear that day, but all she had said was that “Negan wants you tonight instead, don’t make him wait.”. She walked away after that. The wives usually had set days for when they saw Negan, it wasn’t usual for him to change it up, but whatever Negan said goes, of course with consent.Â
You put your glass down on the table next to you, getting up from your comfortable spot. It wasn’t necessary to stay in that room with the other wives, you did have your own room, but, privacy of your own room, versus free drinks.Â
You had knocked on the door to Negan’s bedroom, a muffled “Come in” heard coming from inside. You reached for the handle, twisting it as you opened the door to his room. Closing it behind you, you saw a drunk Negan sitting on the floor, struggling to get his boots off. Sure you’ve seen Negan drunk before, but you hadn’t ever seen him struggle to get his shoes off before. “Need a bit of help?” He looked up at you, rolling his eyes as he tried to untie his shoes. It was a bit funny, but drunk Negan was unpredictable Negan, you decided to hold in your laugh. You took off your heels, why did you wear those? Sitting on the floor across from him, you reached over and untied each of his shoes for him, setting his boots by the bed, tucking the laces inside.Â
He didn’t say thank you, he just got up from his spot on the floor, going to the bed and falling onto it. He seemed tired, maybe all he wanted from you was to get his boots off, you should let him rest, it seemed like he needed it. You get up and go to the bedroom door, your weight and bare feet causing the wood boards to creak as you stepped. Negan heard your footsteps, turning to his side on the bed. “No, stay, just to talk.” He grumbled out, adjusting to sit up and take off his jeans. You wouldn’t help him with that, you didn’t want sex tonight and give him the wrong idea, and he seemed like he could get the job of getting his jeans off by himself. You sat on the opposite side of the bed, bringing your legs up to relax. The next time you looked at him, he had his shirt off as well, and was getting under the covers. “What did you want to talk about?” You ask as you felt his calloused fingertips brush against your wrist, lightly holding on as he pulled your hand against his chest. You’ve been married long enough to him to realize what he wanted. This was your favorite side of Negan, his soft side. He didn’t show it to a lot, you were lucky to be one of the people he showed it to. Pulling back the covers and getting under the bed sheets with him, you scooted towards him, lying your head on his shoulder as he wrapped his arm around you.
“Long day?” You didn’t know much of what Negan went through throughout the day, just that a lot of the time he came back with blood on him, either his or someone else’s. Or something else’s. You were met in response with a grunt. You thought he wanted to talk? Maybe he changed his mind, just wanted to sleep. “I’m gonna get outta this, it’s too tight.” You whispered to him, moving away from him for a second so you could take your dress off. The sound of a zipper filled the quiet atmosphere in the room, “thank you” you whispered out to Negan, taking the straps of your dress off before sliding the fabric off of the rest of your body. It didn’t take long before you found the familiar warmth back under the covers, your head resting in its previous place. You had closed your eyes, ready to fall asleep with the man that you loved, the one you wished truly loved you back. At least you had good cuddles. Your arm rested across his stomach, your leg lying on top of his own. The room was silent, except for the two of you breathing, if you focused hard enough, you swore you could hear his heartbeat, if you just listened close enough-
