Whatevs Bev @whatevsbev - Tumblr Blog

My emotions are wavering the last couple of days. I was so happy and felt so excited about something new. Then, here I am, being depressed because I got excited too fast and didn’t learn my lesson because I overthink. Maybe that’s just it; I’m overthinking too much, but I’m also not stupid. If they wanted to talk to me, they would. I’m not going to double text someone to get their attention, even though I want to desperately do so 😭😭

I'm currently trying to get over this girl, which is hard because it didn't end badly, it just ended abruptly. We stopped talking nearly a month ago for literally no reason and I think it's because she's been talking to someone else. I keep seeing things about how she's adding someone new to her Christmas shopping list and that 2 hours feels like 10 minutes when she's with this person. Fuck, man. Anyways, I've been talking to this girl, I'll call her Micky, at work and we're becoming pretty good friends. She had like, resting bitch face. I didn't know whether or not I could talk to her because she doesn't really talk to anyone at work except our other friend, Emily. One day, she ended up telling me a secret about her and one of our old mangers that she hooked up with. She's like "I'm telling you this because I trust you won't say anything." And I'm pretty good about secrets if someone tells me not to tell anyone, which I haven't. We usually have tasks we have to do each shift and since I was already doing the dishes, I told her that I'd clean her blenders in the beverage area. There's 3 parts; the top, sides and a rubber piece. She came and got the top and the side part, but forgot the rubber piece. So, I brought it to her and she said "Oh man, I thought I grabbed that. I did in my mind." And I went to go attach it to the blender and I said "Don't worry, I got your rubber piece." And she said "Ooo! Keep that up and I'll make you my work wife." And winked and smiled at me. Then, I started talking to her more on another shift and we were talking about this manager we all hate and I said something and it made her laugh so hard that she snorted and she was so embarrassed about it. It was so cute. She told me about her family and that a lot of them were dead and she had a sense of humor about it, which is the kinda thing I do too. She came in the other day and I only had an hour left of my shift and she's like "I don't want you to go, I'm gonna be so sad when you leave." And gave me a pouty face. I was just about to leave and she told me she lost her debit card the previous night when she came in to buy something at work and she couldn't find it. I offered to buy her something to eat before I left and she's like "No, you don't have to do that!!" And I told her to get whatever she wanted and she got a chocolate croissant out of the bakery case and I paid for it and she's like "I'm gonna pay you back when I can, I promise." I said "It was less than $2, I'll be fine." Man. She's just really cute. She's covered in tattoos, which I kinda am too, and we go to the same guy we found out. We have a similar sense of humor and we like the same stuff. She's got amazing blue eyes. They're so bright. I'm a sucker for pretty eyes. I love them. She's 4 years younger than me, but she's so much more mature than I think a 20 year old should be. She's perfect for me, I swear.

Her and I have been talking all night/morning and she said she wanted kids, and I never really wanted any. I guess you just have to meet the right person who'll change your perspective because raising kids with her for the rest of my life sounds perfect.

When the girl you're interested in Snap Chats Aladdin to you and it gets to the magic carpet ride and they're singing "A Whole New World" and she says "Date Goals" and you're so ready for her to become your world. God. This girl, I swear. My stomach is getting butterflies. So fucking cute.

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Attack of the Foot ;-;

Wow! I think I've fucked things up and this blows. Self reminder: Don't develop feelings for anyone. And especially don't let that person know how you feel because you're guaranteed to fuck it up at any given moment. How socially inept are you? God! So dumb. Literally so dumb. Never again. Ever.

That made me smile. She's such a doofus.

She hates when people spell her name wrong or try to call her Jenny. That was one of the first things we talked about when we first met back in October. She hates it, lol!