What Gives Us Our Names

By Alvin Pang

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

Race was naive enough to think that dyeing her hair was enough to alter the pigment of her name, the nature of her shadow. She tried lime green to generate more zest, a fiery red to suggest deep-seated passions, even black, for that laid back retro look. But nothing changed People walked past her on the street, eyes averted, clasping their gaudy shopping bags watchfully. In school she sat in the corners, hoping to blend in with the cracked paint. Her lovers continued to call her by other names when making love. In the dark, and in the throes of ecstasy, they claimed, everyone looked the same. It was easy to be confused, Race was not convinced. She felt different inside, a place where moonlight could not reach. She tried using a microscope, a DNA test, her rose-tinted glasses, but could not figure out why the softly pulsing engine of her being remained invisible to her.Did she not have a name? A history? And did she not buy her own clothes with money she earned the same way as everyone else? Disappointed, Race realised that her should was not the sum of her choices, nor her genes a composite of caresses and strokes leading up to her conception. She envied her friends, the purity of their obliviousness, how they wore their hair  casually long and streaked with gold, gleaming against their skin beneath, gleaming agains their skin, beneath which the blood coursed, without question, like a final answer. She wondered if she peeled back their flesh, unhinged the bone, eased apart the knotted sinews, whether she should also find nothingness there: a space worn away in the shape of their own silence; what colour it must be.

- "Race", What Gives Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

Courage might be the last person you'd go for answer these days. Unassuming, frail-looking and sometimes distracted, he seems to lack the glamour and forcefulness of Action, the casual brilliance of Talent, or the talent and prudence of Caution. His students, who graduate and go on to find Success, hardly ever give him a second thought. But they forget how they first sought to Courage when looking for directions in their lives, beginning new endeavours, or falling in love. Those who felt stuck only had to to speak with Courage to find themselves making a first step towards  progress. 

In fact, Courage enjoys being out of the limelight. He has never hesitated to do the right thing, even in private, nor does he fuss about being given credit. He has pioneered many new ideas and techniques, largely when no one was paying him any attention, and he could work at them with Focus and Patience, his most reliable colleagues. Only he could comfort Anxiety, with gently kisses and private jokes that drew her away from from her own self absorption. Courage loves running marathons; what he lack in energy and brawn, he makes up for in spirit and persistence. 

No one really knows where Courage came from or who his parents were. In his youth, he was considered a hero, and many things, good and evil, have been done in his name. But he prefers to be remembered for his garden - where even the tiniest seeds brave the wind and rain, he says, because it is their nature to grow or die.

I once asked Courage what he was afraid of. He joked that he lived everyday in fear that it would be his last. And then as I turned to go, he whispered to me what he truly feared above all else: that things would remain only as they are.

- "Courage", What Gives Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

There are few who would genuinely recognise Complexity she showed up; and yet many claim to know her intimately. It's true that Complexity has a reputation for being exotic and elusive, and those who become familiar with her sometimes make their fortune. However, she has also been snubbed for being too flamboyant, unpredictable and more than a little difficult to manage. She is not known to be tidy. 

Some fear that Complexity might be a disruptive influence on the impressionable or the ill prepared. The common perception is that she leaves a trial of chaos in her wake, and she is said to have been spotted often around warzones, boardroom and markers. It certainly seems that her voice is loudest in the mob, even though it isn't always clear what she has to say until much later and in much quieter moments. 

Although Complexity does visit dizzying, glamorous places, from the inner orbits of atoms to Alpha Centauri, you might run into her just about anywhere. Complexity also frequents the most ordinary of habitats: beaches, anthill, kindergartens, clouds, the dreams of carried mothers. Curiosity and Wonder- friends who know her well - suggest that she tends to be so involved in whatever she is doing that sometimes she disappears from sight, Then Complexity can remain invisible or appear drab and ordinary for years but bursting again onto the scene. Somehow, we always manage to be caught unawares. 

You can tell the resemblance between Complexity and her twin brother, Truth. While they have different personalities, both are concerned with things as they are, not what we might wish them to be. While Truth commands the respect of great man and high minded leaders, Complexity demonstrates that even the smallest actions can shape the future. It is a matter of seeing how one thing connects with another, in ways we might not have realised. 

Complexity is exhausting to be around. It is not as if she offers stability, comfort, quick answers or the certainty of progress. Of all who have courted her over the years, only Vision manages to keep up with her restlessness. In her presence, he has come to appreciate the value of difference, and the gift of surprise. Walking through her Garden of the New, he learns how simple rules can lead to the most dramatic and unexpected outcomes. Every seed carries within it the the dream and blueprint of the whole. 

Despite Complexity's many demands, Visions embraces her fully. For as long as she exists, the world will never want for mystery. 

- "Complexity", What Gives Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

Failure was not an attractive child. When he was born, even his parents are disappointed. They had wanted a beautiful, bonny, dimpled child like their first born, Achievement. Instead, Failure has come into the world a small, lethargic, grey-skinned baby who seldom smiled. Relatives who came  to visit tried not to look at him too much. They huddled in corners, whispering and shaking their heads. 

Failure had a lonely childhood. At school, Failure was a good student who learnt much and had lots of share. He kept asking on subjects that were not  in the textbook, and trying thing that were not part of the lesson. His teachers thought he was a troublemaker. Most of the students shunned him He began to acquire a reputation for being odd, as well as ugly, and began keeping to himself.

Later on, at work, Failure tried to make himself useful. He involved himself in as many things as possible. He attempted to spearheads new projects, trying out new ideas, that no one in the organisation had thought of before, but soon found that there were few others who are willing to chip in. Before long, he was burnt out with running around. When things go wrong, fingers were pointed at him, even though he was often the first to discover the problem in the first place. Eventually, he lost his job. 

It was while he was setting up his own business that he met Humility. She was a teacher he once attended, helping students with difficulties, and wanted a non-conventional role model to inspire them. His name and student record caught her eye, and she wrote him a beautiful letter inviting him to speak to some of her students. With Humility's help, he found at last a willing audience for the lessons his experiences had taught him. Within the year, they were married. 

That was some years ago, before his business took off. He had many false starts. but Humility was always with him, and many of their former students became staunch supporters of his works, and themselves went on to break new ground in their fields. When asked, they always cited Failure's lessons those many years ago as being the most important element behind their successes. I hear they are now thinking of starting a foundation in his name. 

As for Failure and Humility, they had two children who looking nothing like their parents, but who share their deep strength of spirit. I'm sure you have heard of them, and they're much sought after nowadays. They are known as Experience and Wisdom. Ask them and they will tell you the story of your life. 

- "Failure", What Gives Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

"It had not been an easy journey for Congruence. He had set forth with grand ambitions, lofty ideals and many followers, but it wasn't long before companions left him, appalled by the uncertain demands on the road. 

His robes, once a pristine satin white, were now sullied and worn from the effort of travel. He's had to endure the public heat of day, unexpected storms, dense fog, treacherous quagmires, and sudden tricky hills he did not know how to climb, except one slow step at a time, trying not to slip.

It was seldom clear what his next milestones would be. Many times he stumbled over unseen crevices in the dark, without even the mercy of moonlight to guide him. And always there were things to be taken are of: shelter, the next meal, the safety of his wife and child. But not once did he think of turning back. 

To survive, he learnt how to swim, to speak plainly, to move quickly when necessary, to wait and to rest. He developed a deep distaste for masks and a healthy respect for mirrors. But he was always kind to those who seemed lost or afraid to cross the desert. By leading the way, he showed them how to keep moving forward and to navigate by their won stars. 

At a toll-booth he was detained by Doubt, who demanded proof that he knew where he was going, and whether he had sufficient funds or a return ticket. Emptying his pockets, Congruence displayed the wealth of stories and spare tears he had earned along the way, and pointed in the direction of the future. 

This was how, at last, Congruence arrived at the feast. It did not matter that he was dusty and bruised from his voyage, nor that other guests had already taken their places. With open arms they welcome him and listened in awe as he described landscapes and heartlands that no one else before had walked or witnessed. He spoke of how in his darkness moments when path seemed lost, the clear song of his wife, Conviction,  had kept him from wandering astray.

"Truly," he said, "it is what we love that gives us our names."

Then their son Integrity - who had started his journey as an infant and was now a grown man - stepped forward proudly and began to sing." 

- "Congruence", What Give Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

"It is difficult for Service to stand out. Many people do the same work as she, and there re few opportunities to be noticed for excellence. Only when things go wrong are fingers pointed at her. This happens every once in awhile, because she has many responsibilities and answers to more than one master. Despite this, she keeps doing more than what Efficiency decrees or Duty expects. This puzzles her bosses completely.  

Her habit of doing what is more needed, instead of what is asked of her attracts many critics and suspicions. But her followers appreciate the free hand they enjoy when working for her, and her firm but clear advice when guidance is needed. Service is an excellent teacher, who never asks more than anyone is able to give, and often shows people how much more they are capable of than they have ever imagined. Her own mentor, Purpose, once told her to always remember that she is the most important person in her field - the one who is there at the time. 

When asked to describe her job, Service says she is an artist. This frequently raises eyebrow and much laughter. 

"What creative genius can be there in your work?" is the inevitable question.  To which she would reply with patience and good humour: "That is my job - to find it, everyday."

- "Service", What Gives Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

"It was a special birthday, so many friends and well wishers gathered to mark the occasion. Service and Commitment were first on the scene to get everything ready. Generosity took care of the catering. Inspiration provided music, Patience said she'd clean up afterwards, and Persistence made sure everyone was notified about the party. The room they were in was just they right temperature, and decked with colourful balloons, wonderful toys and intriguing books, kindly supplied by Memory. 

Soon Compassion arrived, bearing flowers and those deep questions of hers that both demonstrated and pave the way for love. Cleairty brought candles, videos, and the necessary hush so everyone could be heard. Many old friends for reacquainted, awkwardly at first and then with great warmth. Purpose embraced Joy, who brought her two children: Daring and Dreaming. Regret caught up with Learning and Maturity. Imagination and Discipline promised to keep in touch more often. And when the old photos, stories and jokes were shared around, even Duty and Pride could not help but laugh. 

Presently, everyone noticed their host in the room, looking as rosy as ever and none the worse for his age except a few strands of grey and a slight paunch. A fine mentor, he had taught everyone the difference between "I" and "We", and how "Them" becomes "Us". Then all the gathered friends sat in a circle, raised their glasses and toasted the one  whose presence, sympathy and quiet advice had meant so much over the years: the one they all knew as Community."

- "Community", What Gives Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

"Despair asks only one thing-that you give yourself up to his care. After travelling a long, hard and dusty road, it is tempting to step aside and into his shade,where he serves a light tea of milk and tears, and wafer baked with sighs. He will tell you among other tales, how he came to be in this quiet place, off the main thoroughfare, after deciding midway through some forgotten and risky venture, that it was more prudent to stay put, settle and set up shop. Many of his customers have been there all their lives. 

Despair keeps no clocks. If you ask him the time, he will say it is too late to complete your journey. He will tell you this is the last stop there is, anywhere. Do not trust the old wily shopkeeper. Instead, rest a while and thank him for his stories of lost glory. Then it is best to be on your way." 

- "Despair", What Give Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

"Hope was exhausted, worn-out, frayed. Over the years, her vision  - once the brightest and clearest there was - has become clouded with fatigue and worry over the thousands little chores need to take care of her many clients daily.

She was called on all the time, for every reason imaginable - to watch over the smallest of promises, to end an unnecessary silence, or gift a child with things he did not truly require. She answers so many requests that people started to notice only when she failed to show, or even when she was merely late for a much anticipated appointment. She received many complaints and drop-outs.

The past few years, fraught with war and pestilence and tragedy, had not been good for her - the work load had mounted, but her resources had dwindled also. Even among her hard-working staff, there were those who faltered: the pattern was clear enough - beginning among the most fervent of her crew they burnt out with waiting; resignation soon followed and they were quickly lost to her rivals.

Most of the time, she tried her best to do what she could, even for those deeply skeptical of her abilities. Her most innovative solutions also tended to be her quietest and most subtle, and as a result, she found it difficult to raise support for her causes despite her success - unlike her competitors, Anger and Delight, who has never been more powerful.

And then she came across the case of two sisters, who wanted nothing else than simply being apart, who longed - as hard as true lover yearned to be joined - to hold each other at arm's length, look into each other's faces and laugh. They travelled along way to see her, and with a certainty possessed by too few of those who's come asking for her favours. 

When Hope tell them how little she could do under the circumstances, expecting them to turn away in dismay and leave, she was surpsied to find them smiling at her, their trembling hands locked to hers in the shape of a plea. 

With eyes made keen again by tears she set them free from each other, let them bid their farewells and walk at last part, on their final and separate journeys across the endless fields."

- "Hope", What Gives Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

I used to  run into Anxiety a lot back when I was rushing from place to place. She would always want me to sit down with her and talk, but then refuse to tell me anything much. She once woke me up in the middle of the night, and all I could listen to was the sound of her breathing. I spent a lot of time with her in cafes, until I realized that she was addicted to caffeine an the sound of her voice. 

Anxiety craves attention. She loves bringing people bad news.  At meetings, she used to shut people up when they were about to say something interesting. In a crisis, she would be the loudest voice in the room. She is difficult to ignore, and has always been a poor listener. Until I learnt to step away from her, I never knew the quality of my own voice. 

It's unclear why I ever spent so much time with her. Perhaps I was fascinated by her loneliness, or was in love with her presence. I remember her as always being hungry, constantly gnawing at anything she could lay her hands on. She has grown so large and awkward, and that she is afraid to go out and meet people. She might spent hours dressing up, but no matter what she wears, she feels naked in front of others. She has forgotten how to laugh. 

Nowadays, she stays mostly indoors talking to Despair, who is blind. She feels heavy and lethargic, and keeps the curtains drawn so people outside cannot see how gross she has become . Still, even though Anxiety claims to prefer the dark, I know she has a secret pair of wings which she's forgotten how to use. Deep in her heart, what she truly wants is to fly again, - if only she could be sure of never falling. 

- "Anxiety", What Gives Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

"Purpose is a clearer thinker than anyone I know. She is also the least forgiving of mistakes, but the most compassionate to those who make them. It all depends on where you are coming from, and whether the error was made from honest ignorance or an attempt to cover things up. 

Because she looked quite youthful and is small in stature. Purpose sometimes get lost in the background at meetings or mass gatherings. But when she stands up to speak, she appears to tower over everyone in the room. Much older people have been known to be intimidated by her stern, unflinching gaze. Her father was Truth, a famous court judge who taught  her to put forward her view clearly and firmly. It's stood her in good stead - she is a powerful speaker, an excellent negotiator, and a natural leader. She has never needed glasses. 

Purpose is not easy to live with, but she is loyal friend. The men she used to go out with seldom lived up to her high expectations. They were always the ones who made the first move to leave. She's always had this knack of telling people not what they want to hear, but what they need to know, and this disturbs them. 

I can see why Passion and Purpose are so attracted to each other. She's fascinated by his energy and intensity, and he admires her sense of focus, how she can always find her way without making a fuss. She calms and steadies him, he makes her feel alive."

- "Purpose", What Gives Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

Learning is older than he looks, because he is young at heart. He loves children, and  can devote hours to be with them although, they can often forget about their time together when they grow up. This saddens him somewhat the, although he never fails to watch them from behind the scenes in the case they need help. The he steps in and intervenes, often without anyone's knowledge that he is doing so. 

Learning used to work full-time in a school, where he particular enjoyed small-group teaching, lab work and extra-curricular activities. He would often spend hours after class with students, talking about things outside the syllabus, such as the meaning of life, the value of relationships, and how to comfort the dying. He's acquired with a reputation - companies now regularly hire him as a consultant, and grown men are turning to him for advice. He's quite pleased about his new work, and it keeps him busy.

An incorrigible traveller, Learning enjoys solitude, but is not addicted to it. I've bumped into him on vacation many times, travelling alone. When he goes abroad, he brings along very little, although he's comfortably well-endowed. Patient, resourceful and insatiably curious, he trusts the journey to provide whatever he needs. 

You don't need to have known Learning for very long to understand that he's a perpetual optimist. Those who knows his father Experience, say that Learning takes after him. What they often overlook is that Reflection was his mother, and that his favourite teacher is Joy. 

- "Learning", What Gives Us Our Names by Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

"By the time he is 63 he was ready to begin his memoirs. It was of course going to be his most difficult work. People lived so fiercely, he remarks once, often as if they could cease at any moment, and at other times, as if they are going to be around forever."

- Excerpt from "Patience", What Gives Us Our Names - Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

"Beauty must have been just about everywhere. I have seen the mark she leaves wherever she goes. You can see it in the smiling faces of young men. the misty nostalgia of the old. Beauty is much sought after, and very much missed."

- Excerpt from "Beauty", What Gives Us Our Names - Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

"Sometimes, he has distant look, as if gazing deep into the horizon. Those who don't know him attribute it to his arrogance and indifference. Those who do know him understand that he listens deeply, and is trying to connect what he knows with what he has just heard, in order to learn something new. He is always looking ahead."

- Excerpt from "Success", What Gives Us Our Names - Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

"If you come across him, please ask him to drop by. Let him know that we miss him - his smile, his playful seriousness, the way he would take you by the hand and show you what you've always wanted to see."

- Excerpt from "Passion", What Gives Us Our Names - Alvin Pang.

[whatgivesusournames-blog]

"Sometimes I think I catch a glimpse of Beauty, usually in the oddest of places-at some small art gallery, in between old shop-houses, in the swaying branches of a raintree, a stone's throw away from the sunset, in the shadow of cracked paint. You might have seen her yourself - she's small of her age, but very nimble, shy yet insatiably curious."

- Excerpt from "Beauty", What Gives Us Our Names - Alvin Pang.