Lady of the Summer Court

Malia (she/fae). Described as a Summer Fae, actual Disney Princess, goddess of baked goods (especially cake and cookies), and more. Lover of plants and animals. Dream house is a cottage by the sea filled with friends, furry kids, and books, all covered in flowers.

[coelii]

reblog to give your headache to elon musk instead

[kinkykinard]

[wildrosemccalin]

All of the migraines, go!

[wildrosemccalin]

So it's been awhile. Lots of things have happened 🥰

[wildrosemccalin]

That feel when you're hungry, but also incredibly nauseous xP

[wildrosemccalin]

Meet Bella! She is the new love of my life. It feels so good to have a cat again. I had suspected that they help my mental health, and the last few days with her have definitely supported that theory. I feel like the past year since I lost Princess that I've been in a haze. And it's like the cobwebs all cleared. I'm finding the energy to get up and do things. I'm singing and dancing around the house again. Smiling and laughing so much more. I feel like I'm bursting with joy. I'm so happy that she likes it here and chose me as one of her humans 😊

[wildrosemccalin]

I know I keep disappearing from tumblr only to reappear with another text post. But screaming into the void where there are friends that might hear is very helpful sometimes. I'm having to learn how to be alone with myself. And I'm finding it to be difficult. Generally in the past there were always friends down the hall, or Princess to be scooped. But without a cat, when I'm home alone, I'm truly home alone. If I keep myself busy, and everything brightly lit, I can mostly keep the anxiety and depression at bay. But if I slow down, or something unexpected happens, I start to spiral. And I don't know how much of it is just that this year has been really fucking stressful so my spoon capacity has been severely limited, or how much of it is just that I need to learn to like myself and be comfortable spending time alone. Or maybe I need an emotional service animal because I have severe enough anxiety that just the presence of a small furry creature under my care is enough to keep a lot of the anxiety and depression under control. I have no idea. I just know that when I get to spend time with Bella, and have her curled up on my lap and purring, everything else kinda falls away. I get so relaxed that I start nodding off half the time. I can't wait until she can come home with me 😊

[wildrosemccalin]

You know something that school doesn't prepare you for? Relationships. Of any sort really. We're not taught the problem solving skills. The ways to effectively communicate with a partner, friend, boss, etc. And now as an adult, trying to figure out all of these things and navigate the myriad of intricate relationships is hard. Couple that with an anxiety disorder and it's often so overwhelming that my brain just breaks. You know the worst part? At least for me, it's the fear. The imposter syndrome. That little voice that tells you that you're not actually fun or interesting, that you don't know what you're talking about, that you're asking too much. That fear that if you say the wrong thing, express a need, place a boundary, the facade will fall and you'll be exposed as a fraud and hated. Why are these things not addressed in our education? Why are things like anxiety and depression not more openly discussed? Why are we not setting people up with the tools to handle this? And yes, that's what therapists are for. And therapy can be great. I finally found a good one and it was amazing. And now my insurance is fucked up and I haven't been able to see one in months. And how much easier, how much better, would therapy have been for me if I'd grown up learning these things and being taught these skills? I just wish that there was a better system

[wildrosemccalin]

I keep having dreams about toxic people that I cut out of my life a long time ago and I'd really like my brain to cut that shit out.

[wildrosemccalin]

I hate having to ask Kody to make space for me. He'll take over the entire couch and then just look at me when I come over to sit down. And if/when I do ask he'll often grumble about it and then as soon as I've sat down he'll stretch back out across me. It leaves me feeling like I'm only allowed to exist in a space so long as it doesn't overly inconvenience him. It just feels really inconsiderate. That idea of taking up as much space as possible and only seeming to care about your own comfort is just so antithetical to how I am. Maybe I'm being overly sensitive? Maybe it's a guy thing that he doesn't realize he's doing? It just feels bad. I feel unwelcome in the space whenever it happens and have a hard time not reacting poorly. If he needs the space because a joint is acting up or something, that's one thing. And that should be communicated. I don't even know what conversation to have.

[wildrosemccalin]

Feeling conflicted. I’ve started going through stuff/packing since I move soon. And there are things that I want to get rid of from my childhood, like my bear lamps. Which are kinda cool, and there’s a lot of history. But also... that’s not the aesthetic I want to cultivate? I just know that my papa would be really upset if I got rid of them. One of them needs to be fixed anyways because the switch has stopped working and I don’t know how to do that. I’m trying really hard to cut down on the amount of stuff I have and trying not to keep things just because they have sentimental value. But it’s really hard. And in this case it’s not even for me, but because I don’t want to make my papa upset/hurt him. But I can’t live my life like that. And just. Ughhhhh. 

[wildrosemccalin]

I am so tired. From everything going on. Just exhausted. That kind of deep bone weary. I want to be more active in helping. But I'm just trying to get through each day and get done the things that I need to do. Pure survival mode. I'm not even planning for the future right now. Which I need to be doing. But I can't. It's too overwhelming. I feel sick and tired almost all the time. I'm so stressed out that my body is trying to eat me from the inside out. I hate it. I hate all of this so much. So I'm going to scream into the void. And then force myself to get back to work.

[revisitingleverage]

308: The Boost Job

[revisitingleverage]

306: The Studio Job

[wildrosemccalin]

To-Do List

Maybe if I write it out here I’ll actually hold myself accountable. 

Climate Bingo discussion post

Week 10 discussion post

Week 10 quiz

Climate Portfolio Paper

Grade final papers

Grade teaching concept

Response Paper 5

Final Paper

Rough draft of Essay

[animalsnaps]

Animal snaps

[weneeddiversebooks]

Centuries of racism and oppression have defined the United States. The death of George Floyd is an unwanted reminder that we must all take a stand. We join with the many activists and creatives who are protesting against systemic racism, white supremacy, and policy brutality.

We will use the WNDB platform to promote anti-racism and #BlackLivesMatter resources and literature for children and adults, starting with these, which we will update continuously. If you have a resource to add, please email [email protected].

Fund Racial Justice: Where to Donate 

A place to start, for everyone who can afford to donate. (Graphic credit to @allthingseka on Twitter/Instagram)

George Floyd Memorial Fund - Official GoFundMe to support the Floyd family. 

Minnesota Freedom Fund - Community-based nonprofit that pays criminal bail and immigration bonds for individuals who have been arrested while protesting police brutality.

Black Visions Collective - A Black, trans, and queer-led organizations that is committed to dismantling systems of oppression and violence, and shifting the public narrative to create transformative, long-term change. 

Reclaim the Block - Coalition that advocates for and invests in community-led safety initiatives in Minneapolis neighborhoods. 

Campaign Zero - Online platform and organization that utilizes research-based policy solutions to end police brutality in the U.S. 

Unicorn Riot - Non-profit organization that is dedicated to exposing root causes of dynamic social and environmental issues. 

[soupscold]

hey! in the midst of all this, spreading this information could potentially save LOTS of folks out there in protest! it costs Absolutely NOTHING to share. the original thread is on Twitter by strwbrrymew. the link to the thread is here, it contains more important information to note, including a video about how to do a proper eye flush should someone be teargassed.

[soupscold]

Adding on to this as I've found more resources.

[thatlittlered]

Another great point to make against the 'righteousness of the police' is the fact that they can just tear gas at any time they see fit.

The media literally streams it at every protest, and nobody is shocked. Nobody is appalled. Everyone is talking about rights but God forbid someone that's not white or someone who's protesting against the system they represent expresses free speech and tries to get their voice heard.

[gallusrostromegalus]

So one of my neighbors has a lawn Roomba or whatever they're called, and this thing trundles around looking like a background robot in the background of the original trilogy, and ABSOLUTELY BAFFLING THE DOGS.

They have concluded, I think, that it's some kind of prey animal because right after this video ended they decided to crouch down and stalk it, which means I'm 90% sure I'm going to have to stop Arwen from eating it at some point.

[theodorepython]

Of course it's a prey animal it fucking eats GRASS

[gallusrostromegalus]

While I can’t fault your reasoning on robot taxonomy, apparently we’re both wrong:  Arwen, as much as she is a high-prey-drive animal, is foremost, a herding dog, and has decided that the Lawn Roomba is a SHEEP.

What happened is the lawn roomba belongs to the guy that does most of the maintainence on the neighborhood park, and he had it out grazing on a different section of lawn when my parents came down for a walk and Arwen was siezed by 200 years worth fo Kelpie Instincts, rolled out of her Harness and proceded to herd the shit out of this tiny, oblivious robot.  

Everything was on display- mock-stalking, intimidating eye contact, barking, running in front of it to try to get it to balk, the scariest barking she can muster (which is actually.  pretty scary if you’re not used to Loud Dogs), looking back at my parents for directions.  or rather, looking at my Mom while Dad tried unsuccessuflly to capture her.

After about ten minutes they realized she wasn’t biting it, and decided to let her play Sheep Simulator 5000 for a while. She eventually figured out that 

It  doesn’t respond to Yelling, Posturing or Aggressive Eye Contact

It does respond to having it’s wheels or bump hazards hit 

It would respond to its side being nosed or slapped by moving in a different direction

Conent that this was apparently some kind of blind, deaf and particularly stupid sheep, she could now manage the robot by smacking it if it got too close to the creek bed or fence for her liking, and was eventually content to sit on the highest point of the field and Supervise (TM) it.

“Hey.” Said Roger, owner of the robot. “Do you think if I put the ramp down she’ll herd it into the back of my pickup?”

Arwen was mostly asleep in the afternoon sun as roger put the ramp down but woke right up when mom Whistled, then pointed at the truck.  She immediately went after the robot and did something that wouldn’t have occured to me, an allegedly more intelligent being: the robot is roughly triangular, and when it hits an obstacle, will change direction so that one of its other sides (rather than points) is now the ‘front’.  So to get it to move in a straight line in the direction she wanted, Arwen would smack the two sides of the robot that she didn’t want it to go in in quick sucession, and got it across the field, over a small hill and up the ramp as fast as it’s clumsy little wheels could go.

“I didn’t know you had a fully-trained sheepdog!” Said Roger

“Me either.” said Mom.

So Arwen now has a Semi-Weekly Appointment to play with Sheepbot.