- ̗̀ dress me up & watch me die

- ̗̀ wong lina. journalism. there was always a very small delay between something happening and her s m i l e, as if she had to remind herself to pull the STRINGS , and it was agonizing. she didn’t like the SHADOWS inside her. they tasted of dust and too many nightmares. she didn’t like pouring them into other people’s hands. it was her b u r d e n to bear.

[wleena-blog]

—* so this trash aka me will drop all my old threads as most of the people i had threads with left anyway and that starter was like 100 years old anyway. i’m sorry to all you lovely angels and if you want to plot out something new LIKE this post and i will send you a message where i try to pretend that i’m cool , not awkward & creative ! 

[wleena-blog]

(( @yajiae​ ))

                        —* STRANDS OF EBONY HAIR STUCK TO HER FOREHEAD, and raindrops trickled down her cheeks. rain was soaking her thin summer dress ( she had changed into a hurry ) and her arms were wrapped around her shivering body.. only an hour ago, she was sitting on her floor. wrapped up in a blanket and her hands pressed against her ears, muffling the sound from the bone-chilling rumble  accompanied by lightening that flickered outside her bedroom window. she couldn’t recall how she found herself in front of her ex-best friend’s door -- all she actually knew was that she thought about jiae, when she was all alone without anyone to comfort her and that her mind was that clouded by pure panic that it caused her to run out of her apartment and wandering around in the rain for half an hour before she was standing here: eyes wide in panic and her lips trembling. even now her was heart beating hard against her chest, the noise outside messing up her head. at this moment she couldn’t it think straight and it felt as if the memories of their last meeting had vanished into nothingness.  ❝ hi - i, i’m - i didn’t know , i thought. ❞ the usual so-eloquent girl stuttered when she opened her mouth. fear choked the words in her throat when she tried to explain the situation without sounding like a scared child .  ❝ it was - it is thundering outside and - ❞ she continued stuttering, ❝ i was alone, i thought that, i thought i’d- i was just so scared.  ❞ she paused, her nails clenching into her arms deeper, dark hues constantly wandering around while she was speaking.  ❝ please, please let me stay here, i don’t have anyone else but you.❞

[wnq-writers]

How can you love me, when all that is terrible exists within me?

Ranata Suzuki, Haiku Poem (via witchbitchwrites)

[khbxx131]

[wleena-blog]

yajiae.

     of all things jiae expected, lina crying wasn’t one of them. she didn’t remember the last time she saw the taller girl cry, if she ever did in front of her remained a mystery to the brunette. her eyes widened slightly at the sight, a mixture of emotions rushing through her. she was concerned even though she knew she shouldn’t, lina had chosen her cards and their fate had been sealed from the moment the other walked out of her life but jiae couldn’t help but to still care. confusion swam in her eyes as well, her head tilting slightly as her mind wondered why the girl was crying if she claimed that she never loved her. lina herself voiced out that they had never been friends to begin with, she shouldn’t be the one hurting here  –  was jiae so pathetic that the other felt like crying because she felt somewhat bad she ruined her?  her heart felt as if it was being pierced through with a hundred tiny needles, tears finally falling down her cheeks as she stared up at her ex best friend with a mix of hurt and bitterness on her features.  “ you don’t know me. who are you to say i’m kind ?  that i’m not fucked up? ”  she spit out bitterly, aware that this wasn’t what she should do. she should have left when she still had the chance, to walk out first and forget this happened. but now staying had consequences too, her badly wrapped wounds were now open once again and staying further in lina’s presence felt like salt in them. when the taller girl left her behind, jiae merely pretended the other didn’t exist and tried to move on with her life  –  a simple band-aid for a bullethole would never fix it, but the brunette liked to pretend it did.  “ do you know why i’m here?  it’s because i’m not a good person either. i’ve got so many issues i wouldn’t know where to begin. ”  another bitter chuckle escaped her lips, the tear streaks on her face probably didn’t help with her messy look.  “ you remember the head cheerleader at our high school, right?  she always messed with me but i didn’t care because i had you. ”  a pause, a bitter smile.  “ but you weren’t there anymore and so i was just so mad at everything… she said something pretty nasty and i punched her, it felt nice. and i’m not going to lie, i wished she was you because i was so heartbroken you had left me. ”  more tears fell down her cheeks, the shorter of the two doing nothing to stop them.  “ unluckily for me, she fell down the stairs and broke an arm. long story short i was transferred to another school because i needed to start new, you know?  here comes another reason why i’m not kind or a good person.”  opening her heart and backstory to lina was pointless, really, the other had expressed how they were never friends and wouldn’t care that her leaving had triggered a series of unlucky events for her. but perhaps letting all out would help close those wounds, to finally close a chapter that was never really adressed before.  “ i know we were never friends, friends don’t keep secrets from one another. you never thought i was your friend and while i liked to believe we were, i kept secrets too. i never told you i was bi, partly because i was scared myself and partly because i didn’t want you to think i was a freak and leave. ”  she bit her lower lip for a moment, trying to keep herself together. she was already crying so there was no point in trying to stop the tears from staining her skin or the edges of her clothes, but she balled her fists in an attempt to keep her fingers from trembling.  “ you still left, so i played myself. anyway, dear cheerleader bitch found out somehow and let everyone at our old and my new highschool know about it. started some nasty rumors too, one of them included you. ”  her eyes searched for lina’s, a sad smile blooming on her face.  “ she said you left because you knew and who would wanna be my friend like that?  it’s stupid but i believed her. ”  back then she would have believed anything her tormentors said, she was hopeless and so alone. as much as it hurt her to admit it, lina had been the only light in the darkness that was her life. but even that light had gone out so easily, jiae was left lost in the dark until the darkness consumed her; becoming bitter and reckless.  “ flash forward to graduation night and i was drunk so i thought it would be a great idea to steal her car to make her pay for what she did, but i’m not a good driver and the alcohol didn’t help so i crashed her car against the school’s wall. ”  a genuine laugh escaped her lips this time, amusement filling her eyes as she remembered her stupid mistake that granted her a trip to hongdae as one of the supposed delinquents. her smile dimmed from her face as she looked up at lina once again, there was no reason for her to stay anymore. she just needed to get it all out of her system once before they both– jiae forgot about her. she was just defeated, shoulders sagging and sadness clouding her features. had it been anyone else she would have lost her temper at the things the taller had said, how she had hurt once again. but not lina. she could never hurt lina no matter how much she hated it, she was a weakness the brunette liked to pretend didn’t exist.  “ i don’t blame you for how i turned out, i made some shitty choices myself to end up here. i just wanted to get it all out and i wanted to hear you say it… admit you lied to me and used me, so i can get closure. ”  her voice remained monotone, no trace of emotion left in it. she was just tired of hurting and wanted everything to end. jiae wiped the tears from her cheeks, stepping forward to lina until they were eye to eye (  had jiae been taller ) .  “ truth is i want to hate you and punch your dumb face but i can’t. ”  she confessed lastly, wrapping her arms around the other’s waist for a final hug. lina wasn’t that much taller than her, but enough for jiae to press her forehead against the other’s neck, hiding her tears on the crook of her neck. this was it. the end.  the brunette stepped back after a moment, avoiding the other’s eyes as she silently turned around and picked up her backpack  – if their classmates lingering near the door bothered her as they looked curiously between both of them, jiae never showed it as she walked towards the exit.

                        — * HER WORDS PIERCED THROUGH HER HEART, AND SHATTERED IT TO TINY PIECES SPILLED ON THE PATH SHE HAS CHOSEN TO TAKE . with every other word leaving jiae’s mouth, it felt as if someone stomped on the  F R A C T U R E S   of her shattered heart, waiting for her to have another emotional outburst— ( with success it appeared ). her hands began trembling again and even drawing in a breath resulted to her body shaking. the pictures of jiae suffering appeared to be too REAL in this moment, crossing her mind and leaving her empty and her body drenching with pain. all the time she had been alone. alone and with nobody to protect her from the pain inflicted by others. her  W O R D S  alone pressed tears in her corners again and anguish and guilt clenched her heart. when she left ; she foolishly told herself that jiae would be fine. she tried to talk to the girl ( the worst of them all ) and even offered her money to leave her best friend alone. yet, in the back of her mind she knew that money wouldn’t ease the situation and by doing that she only came to realise, that she became like her mother, the person she despised the most. and still she left her behind - for her own selfish reason. and when she left she did not only gave up the CONTROL over her body ( the last thing she had control over ) when she chose to recover mentally, but her best friend, the only person she had truly L O V E D in that fucking mess she called her life. only now , in all that mess, the picture fell together and she realised that everything could’ve been so easy, if only she endured for a little longer, for once placing someone over herself. then, jiae wouldn’t be part of a program that promised a future when there was NONE  and perhaps it would’ve been her, crashing the car instead of jiae and would be part of the program and perhaps she deserved it, considering all the things she had done. done to her best friend. but she didn’t even dare to call jiae her best friend anymore. not even in her mind. not when jiae deserved better. deserved something a fucked up person like lina could never give her. a simple apology wasn’t enough. as jiae said she broke her heart and for that every word existing in the world wasn’t enough. after all for already a long time words had become nothing but means to hurt people for the girl. that’s why for jiae’s sake alone, she had to push the feelings lingering in her and begging her to let them spill over back. AGAIN. sealing them in depths of her heart and pretending that had love never existed in her life anyway. what was it good for anyway ? it meant she would only lose control again, a fear inflicted to her bones since she had been a child. even when jiae was crying she couldn’t overcome that fear, that she would lose again. and even when the heat of her body warmed her and made her doubt about everything; luring her to wrap her arms around the smaller girl and gave in, she still couldn’t say anything, unable to move. if it wasn’t for the small embrace, she probably would’ve collapsed with her body already heavy with guilt -- and the moment jiae let her go, she could feel her legs giving in for a moment before she could manage to get hold on a table. --  S E C O N D S  feeling like hours passed, and her gaze was still fixated on the door, as if jiae was still standing there. and as she stared at the spot, still stuck in the moment, she finally knew what jiae meant with being heartbroken and yet no tears seemed to come out, as if her body was telling her that after all there was a reason she chose to ignore any of her emotions. but her legs were moving to the exit as if someone was telling her not to end it like this and when the sun rays hit her face ( the weather her ironically nice compared to her mood ), her squeezed eyes searching for jiae, she felt as if the truth would finally leave her lips. perhaps granting them a happier ending. but in this moment she didn’t know how WRONG she was. ( if she only had punched her in the face ) “ jiae.” she raised her voice, panting when she quickened her pace. “ why are you making it so difficult for me. ” she muttered when she caught up with her and stopped before her, drawing in a breath.   “ it’s true.” she lifted her head, taking another deep breath before she opened her mouth again. “ i don’t know you at all and she was right. right about what she told you.  i left you because i knew about it .” A LIE. an almost perfect one. a lie that could’ve been only detected by the slight tremble of her lips, “ and i wished you would hate me because that would be better than you loving me.” silence. “ so let’s not meet each other again, because that’s everything i have to tell you.”

[wleena-blog]

{ moodboard }: lina && jiae ( aka liae ) @yajiae

❝  i wanted to tell you that wherever i am, whatever happens, i’ll always think of you, and the time we spent together, as my happiest time. i’d do it all over again, if I had the choice. no regrets. ❞

[kyuristin-blog]

[yajiae]

@wleena !

[lilycons-blog]

jieqiong/kyulkyung ♡ like or reblog if you use!

[wleena-blog]

『SMS→???』

Mirae: who the fuck set the trash can outside on fire!?!?

Mirae: I told him not to do it

Mirae: then again, it's him we're talking about

lina: a trash can.

lina: on fire ?!?!?

lina: awesome.

lina: send me a pic ??

lina: wait who's "him" send me a pic of him as well

lina: i will write a blog entry about him !!!!!!

[wleena-blog]

idkalistair.

“okay, okay. i won’t touch you, but can you please sit down. you look like you’re about to fall over any minute.” alistair gestured to his couch for lina to sit down so that lina wouldn’t hurt herself. he looked past the harsh words and focused on lina’s overall well-being, just like he always did. when lina decided to settle down onto the floor, alistair could only sigh. “you’re killing me lina.” he sat down on the floor, in front of the younger girl, and stared right into her eyes. “i’m a liar? i’ve never lied to you.” it was true, alistair has never once lied to his adorable friend. though he has kept many parts of his life secret, it was to protect her not himself. it was best for lina for her not to mingle in his wild ways. lina was far better than that. “if you want to know everything that i do, all you had to do was ask me. but you never did till now.” he rubbed his hands together while thinking the next thing to say without making the other burst into tears again. “lina i haven’t replaced you, no one can take your place. i’m sorry i haven’t spoken to you, i’m… working out some very personal things i haven’t dealt with before. it’s not because i don’t care for you.” alistair rubbed his very tired eyes before looking back towards lina with a sweet smile. “i’ll stop with the gifts if you want, but don’t hate me. also, this is my apartment.”

@idcalistair· - ̗̀  ( ❛ * ☾ ·˚ ❜ ) —❛yes i wanted to kill you but now when i think about it i don’t want to do it anymore, but  also you’re a liar, liar, liar. i can’t decide and it makes me sad .❜ she rambled when a sob suddenly escaped her throat, and tears were already welling up again threatening to cause another breakdown. with already being too intoxicated and tired from the two hour walk, her usual indifference was gone and while  alistair belonged to one of only a small number of friends (  he was probably the only person she could call her friend now ) she’d never cried in front of him. and perhaps she would’ve been embarrassed but right now all she cared about was to pour out her feelings even if it mean to do it in a very childish way.❛ you’re always lying , acting as if you care about me when you don’t , you’re such a liar—❜ she paused, when she suddenly put her hand on his head, twirling his hair around her fingers. ❛even your hair is lying acting as if it was another colour.❜ she let go of it, hugging her knees again. ❛ you’re right, i’m selfish , i should have asked.❜ she let her head fall on the ground, when she turned around hiding her head in her arms again, muffling the sound of her sobs. ❛ selfish lina. you’re so selfish.❜ she kept repeating it for a minute, before she finally turned around, still lying on the floor. ❛ what is it ? what is bothering you ... or who is bothering you ?❜ she suddenly asked, her voice heavy with fatigue and her eyes threatening to close any minute. and though she would probably forget everything as soon as the sun would rise again she had to ask, he was her friend after all ( though she declared that she hated him minutes ago ) , the person she cherished the most, the one she adored.  ❛ i don’t care about gifts,they'll never make me happy if you keep things from me. i just want you to tell me the things that are bothering you, although i hate you. ❜ she mumbled, forcing her eyes open.❛ and it’s mine now.❜ she turned around again when she licked the floor.❛ i licked it, it’s mine.❜ she said, with a silly grin on her face.

[wleena-blog]

kxngmn.

his eyebrows rose upon hearing her words, seeing how he had no clue just what the hell she was talking about. however, he didn’t really same to mind. what caught his eye was the lines on her face, how red she was from the marks and it makes him chuckle. it wasn’t everyday someone suddenly took his bag to sleep on in a place like this. he tries not to seem all too amused, by having himself purse his lips together. the girl had just woken up, looking like a mess and the last thing he needed was to hear about how he was so mean for making fun of her like this. minhyuk didn’t even know her. “it’s not.” he answers her question, just as he adjusts the way that he sat. “well, that’s something we’d probably get along on. emotions suck, don’t you think?” he says, smirking as he would think to himself momentarily, remembering all the times that he’s dealt with emotions and feelings, how it would all just crumble and crush him right before his eyes. a pause happens as he hears how she knew his name, making his eyes widen for a moment before saying, “yeah…that’s me. how do you know me?”

- ̗̀  ( ❛ * ☾ ·˚ ❜ ) —❛yes they are unnecessary and without them humanity wouldn’t be so stupid.❜  she mumbled, rubbing her temples. usually lina would choose her words carefully and not even hinting at the things that were going on in her twisted mind. the plastered smile gracing her lips never indicated on her thoughts but even lina was unable to put on an act when she was just too tired and  ( even if she would never admit it ) embarrassed as well. instead she rather concentrated on swiping away the strand of hairs which were sticking to her forehead. ❛ so, what was it that made you so bitter that you think emotions suck, hmm ?❜ she now smiled, resting her chin on her palms as she slowly tilted her head. were it his parents or just his life in general that was so bad that he thought it would be better not too feel anything at all ?  ❛ i knew it !❜ she suddenly bursted out, her calm facade changing to that of a child who’d just found out that one plus one equals two. ❛ you’re alistair’s friend so i just had to use social media, scroll through his lists of “friends” and i found you. also you’re hanging out with him quite often so you were important enough for me to notice.❜ she said, straightening her back and clearing her throat. alistair was one of her very few friends she didn’t push out of her life, therefore his safety was even more important than anything else. ❛ anyway, i would like you to stay away from him. i think you’re a bad influence and he’s just too pure and kind and you might change him to something he isn’t or whatever. ❜

[wleena-blog]

yajiae.

      her mind was telling her to leave, to just walk away first this time and forget she had found lina again. she could still do it, it was obvious their awkward conversation would go nowhere and the other didn’t know her to begin with. she could slip away and file it as another thing she needed to forget, most likely drowning it in alcohol to numb the pain. yet her heart had her rooted on the spot, fingers clutching her backpack and feet glued to the floor. despite how much it hurt knowing her best friend didn’t remember her, jiae couldn’t stop the desire of just listening to the other talk a little bit more. the masochist in her didn’t seem satisfied enough about her heart slowly breaking all over again. her eyes snapped up from where they had been staring when lina mentioned her previous hair color, surprise painted all over her face at the revelation that the other knew that. she had dyed her hair blonde since she first started at hongdae, brown to blonde was kind of her way of leaving the old jiae behind. not many knew though, she had kept her past life a hushed secret  –  her tears, her hurt, her terrible high school experience, all of it. only a few knew the reason she had joined the program and those were her close friends, no one outside the tight unit of delinquents should know. yet lina did. of course it was just jiae hoping for too much again, the other probably guessed it from how her shade of blonde wasn’t completely natural even though she had dyed her roots recently. it wasn’t too far off so, again, jiae thought nothing of it.  “ yeah, you’re right. i was a brunette back then but that reminded me too much of my past, i guess i needed a change. ”  she smiled bitterly, memories rushing past her eyes as she looked up at lina. god. her best friend hadn’t really changed, not in her eyes. she had obviously grown taller and prettier,  (  lina was always the prettiest in jiae’s eyes )  a shadow of someone she used to know. she’d be lying if she said it didn’t hurt. “ why not ?  people fucking suck but you can’t help falling in love with them. ”  that was the closest she’d ever come to confessing anything, it didn’t matter now  –  not when she had long gotten over it but to really find closure with lina she needed to get everything off her chest, even if the other didn’t know what she truly meant. the other’s words made her crack a bitter smile, finding it ironic how lina admitted she hated the type of people she was –  had been. jiae wasn’t really listening to anything else the other said, her heart was breaking itself and her lungs didn’t seem to work properly. she felt dizzy for a moment, to the point she closed her eyes as her jaw locked. she couldn’t. why couldn’t lina just leave her alone ?  why bring back all those memories she had long buried and forgotten ?  she hated her. she hated her so much and yet, at the same time, she didn’t. the only thing jiae had wished for during high school was for lina to come back, she didn’t care how or why or when. she needed a friend during her darkest times but no one was there to hold her, which ultimately brought her to bring out the worst in her. the brunette’s final words seemed like the last nail to the coffin that was jiae’s heart, reminding her everyone left. her parents didn’t want to see her, her siblings thought she was fucked up, her past relationship had crashed and burned, her friends were probably fleeting too  –  only brought together from mutual despair and a social etiquette clasped to them as criminals. lina had been the first one to go, the rest had simply followed through the years. “ you can’t– you can’t say that. ”  her voice trembled, the walls she had built around herself were crumbling. the ache in her chest was almost unbearable, fingers shaking as she looked up at lina with glassy eyes. no matter what, she wouldn’t cry. “ i’m not nice. you don’t know me, i’m fucked up and that’s why everyone leaves. i’ve grown used to it, fuck, i’m just expecting it everyday. ”  jiae shook her head, tearing her eyes from lina and focusing back on holding her backpack. she had to leave. now.  “ you can’t say that because you were the first one to take advantage of me the day you said you were my best friend and the next day you disappeared. i don’t even care that you don’t remember me, it fucking hurts, sure. but i don’t care. just stop lying to me. ”

- ̗̀  ( ❛ * ☾ ·˚ ❜ ) —if hearts could really break, this very moment problem would have broken her heart probably more than once. and though she knew that it was  impossible, that they could break and leave shattered pieces behind, lina could almost feel her heart break from the aching pain. the pain her best friend had to go through when she left. when she left , she thought that she’d protect jiae. protect her from the awful human being she was. someone who would leave anyway;  and the sooner she left the less she’d hurt. jiae would go over it and  she’d find someone new, someone she deserved, someone that wasn’t greedy for her friendship and love even though they knew that they could never give it back the same way she did. but when jiae told her that something so insignificant like her hair colour still reminded her of her past, she could only figure that her life obviously didn’t change to better. yes, lina knew that jiae wasn’t having the best time at high school  and she knew that she was hurt a lot and while lina always tried to cheer her up, she’d never known that it was that terrible. god, she was so stupid.  jiae was hurting all the time (and she couldn’t even think about it without bitterness clouding her mind ) but instead of taking the pain away from her she inflicted even more pain to her when she just left, making false promises and not even bothering to check on her while she was too busy to reduce her own pain. nevertheless, despite of everything she truly loved her best friend. and one day  the cowardice just set in. she realised that jiae had already become a part of her life, taking away her rationality and yet she was happy with not having control over her feelings. and still, instead of risking to get hurt again she preferred to hurt one of the most important people in her life for her own selfish reason. and that was why, she’d never have friends because in the end happy ends only existed in the lives of good people. something lina had never been ( and will never be ). ❛ as you’ve said because people suck and why should i risk getting hurt then i can just avoid it.❜ she shrugged lightly, acting as casual as she could. lina hadn’t changed at all, she was still the horrible human-being she used to be years ago and her selfishness was still the reason she would use as an excuse for all of her terrible action. but how could she ever admit that it sucked loving someone more than anything. how could she admit that she was so scared of people leaving her that it kept her awake at night  and how could she admit to herself that she was terribly lonelty but would rather be starved for love when she knew that she could avoid breaking her heart all over and over again. jiae was the only person who was worth to risk everything but when she left behind and experienced how it messed her up she decided she would never to that to herself again. she would just ignore her feelings instead of becoming a mess again. and even now she chose to act as if she oblivious to everything happening around her, ignoring that her friend was closing her eyes for too long and that she looked as if she would pass out any second the longer she would spend time in her presence.  ❛ i’m sorry, i didn’t  —❜ she didn’t know. what a lie. how could she lie like that when this time she knew her friend was hurting. again and again.  ❛ i, i just wanted —❜ her mind was blank, her throat dry when her eyes met her glassy ones. it was heartbreaking, from the way her voice trembled and her body was shaking, she couldn’t bear it any longer. and with every passing second, her facade kept on crumbling. and the worst was that she could just keep watching, if she didn’t want to get close to her again, if she still wanted to protect herself. and though her mind was telling her it was the best to leave, tears welled up in her eyes and a sob lurched from her throat. no, she didn’t expect to cry first, she thought it would be jiae and yet without even realising a tear streamed down her face, instantly followed by many others. why was she crying ? she couldn’t be hurt, after all she’d left her and moved on. didn’t it mean that she was over it ? but again why was she crying ? she knew that she’d taken advantage of her, she was aware of every single terrible thing she’d done but hearing these words coming out from jiae’s mouth rattled her bones and knocked out the air out of her lungs.  ❛ you’re kind.❜ she said, drawing in a deep and shaky breath. ❛ you’re not fucked up the world is and never, you should get used to it.❜ she said, relieved that jiae already had broken their gaze when her voice failed. all she wanted was to wrap her arms around her and telling her it’d be okay, that she’d be happy and that she was loved. just once, she wanted to feel the warmth of her body again, making her believe that nothing could hurt her when she’d just have jiae by her side. but she couldn’t do that again, not when all she wished for was to be happy. however, with becoming a part of her life again, she’d never be happy again   ❛ you’re right, i have no right to say it. not when i;ve taken advantage of you. ❜ she mumbled her eyes fixed on the ground. she couldn’t look at her, not when she was going to hurt her again. but at least, this time, she’d finally end this. completely without leaving any pieces behind. ❛ but.❜ she paused, lifting her head when she swiped away another tear. ❛ i should have never said that i’m your best friend. i shouldn’t have lied like this , acting as if we were friends. and that’s why—❜ she clenched her fist, yet she couldn’t keep herself from trembling. ❛ you shouldn’t befriend people like me. that’s why you should stay away from people like me because we’re terrible and the worst is we’re not even sorry for fucking people over.❜ she was a liar and she was terrible. terrible. terrible. terrible. but if she just kept lying, even her lies would become reality and then no one could hurt her anymore.❛ so yeah you can insult me or slap me, because i deserve it but don’t expect me to apologise, jiae, it’s just the way i am.❜

[wleena-blog]

nohju.

anger, the most interesting emotion? if that’s what she thinks, then so be it. as cliché as it sounds, lina’s sort of a mystery to jungshin. there’s more to her than meets the eye and he can’t help but feel drawn to her, though he doesn’t really understand her. ‘but anger ruins people’s lives.’ he states matter-of-factly, his eyes boring into hers, a faint smile still plastered on his face. i should know, he wants to add, but decides to stay quiet instead. as soft as he is, jungshin is by no means dense; he can feel the atmosphere getting tense and it’s making him uneasy. did he strike a chord? did he say something he shouldn’t have? ‘i just wanted to point out that we’re quite similar, in a way.’ here it comes — everyone’s favorite question! ‘i don’t know. maybe because you never asked me? besides, i have nothing special to say.’ he licks his lips, shrugging casually. having to lie to her bothers him, but it’s not like he has a choice. the truth is just too ugly, too shameful, and he can’t bear to let it be known. ‘my dad’s pretty cool. quite a funny guy, i guess. i think you’d like him. he really has no luck in the romance department, though. and i take after him, sadly.’

- ̗̀ ( ❛ * ☾ ·˚ ❜ ) — ❛ any emotion does, though ?❜ she blinked at him as if he just said something utterly stupid. of course he wasn’t , but at times when nobody would understand her , - her twisted mind and the ideas that’d bring with it she would just tell herself that she wasn’t abnormal in any way.  ❛ of course we tend to believe so, i mean that’s how it works. we watch the news, we see angry people doing terrible things because they were angry bla bla. and we think it’s simple as that but it isn’t. ❜ she twirled a strand of hair, her eyes travelling away in her thoughts. she was right, her mother didn’t do terrible things to her because she was angry. it was out of despair for happiness. ❛ take gambling for an example, they destroy lives and even families. but it isn’t the anger that destroys it but the selfish need to pursue happiness by having money.❜ she shrugged, not bothering that she was rambling. actually she didn’t care but when she talked to jungshin she didn’t feel the need to filter the thoughts that would lure in her head, waiting to be spilled out. it was as if he was interested or at least pretended to be.❛ we’re not. ❜ her smile faded from her lips. no one was and especially not someone like jungshin. he was too good to be compared to someone like lina and if her knew about the terrible things she’d done to the people she loved he wouldn’t say that. hell, he wouldn’t even talk to her now.  ❛ well, i’m asking now.❜ she smiled, the tension leaving from her body as they now focused on him. ❛ you’e young you can’t be that bitter, i’m sure you will find someone and do all the cheesy things like in some korean dramas. ❜ she said her words laced in sincerity. even she didn’t believe that something like that would happen to her, she truly wish that jungshin would find someone like that. he deserved someone nice, someone who’d stay with him. ❛ and what about your mom ? is she a lot like you?  ❜

[kaleidoscopewords]

I don’t need those things called friends. They’re too unreliable for my liking. The only person nowadays that I can trust is myself

- so simple yet so complicated (via sunhsetful)

[extrasad]

my mother’s trust issues are leaking into my chest and I’ve got my father’s nose and his tendency to stop calling back so I’m sorry about the 9 missed calls I have from you and the 6 voicemails I never played I swear I’d love you if I could

(via extrasad)

[roakims]

[wleena-blog]

top 5 of the most handsome guys at hongdae?

of course alistair ( @idkalistair) he’s perfect in every way, ( when i see his face, there’s not a thing that i would change, because he’s amazing just the way he is ~~ ) he isn’t only handsome but has a lovely personality as well. also he has the hongkong genetics so.. our jungshin ( @nohju ) is a cutie, he resembles that actor of that kdrama with the girl who pretends to be a boy? and as much as i hate to admit it nathaniel park ( @wtfnate) is slightly handsome, but the celebrity thingy ruins his face, but he does look pretty with coffee spilled over his shirt. and that guy with the blue eyes ( @bavkhyun) , yes pretty to look at. lastly i think our grandpa ( @ujitae ) has that ahjusshi-charm going on ( i was paid to say this).