samantha

- enfp | pisces aries cusp | 19 - - feminist | mother | writer -

[that-ttc-wench]

I’m sorry that I haven’t been able to stay pregnant. I’m sorry that I haven’t been able to make my husband a dad. I’m sorry that I can’t stomach going to baby showers. I’m sorry that each pregnancy announcement makes me grasp a bottle of Jack Daniels. I’m sorry that my heart breaks every time someone asks me if I have kids. I’m sorry that I can’t afford IVF. I’m sorry that nothing I’m doing is fixing my infertility. I’m sorry that my body was only made to kill my children. I’m sorry that I understand the inclination to steal an infant from a nursery. I’m sorry that my state makes adoption impossible if you aren’t rich. I’m sorry that my womb is empty and broken. I’m sorry that I would pay someone to get pregnant for me. I’m sorry that I feel so insane about all of this. I’m sorry that I’ll most likely never be a mom if I stay in Illinois. I’m sorry that this hurts my husband so much. I’m sorry that I’m this way. I’m just….sorry.

[thewanderingovary]

Logs on to Facebook… 

Sees the first post is a pregnancy announcement…. 

[briningupbarz-deactivated201910]

I just want to be pregnant. That’s all. I want to go through hard labor and end up with a beautiful bundle of joy. I want to be kept up all night by a crying baby who will only be consoled by my touch. I want to watch them grow, learn and become their own person.

“I don’t know why youre rushing” “Are you sure you want this” “When the timing is right” “Babies are cute, but they’re work”

I hear this every day. If you’ve never struggled to conceive, you don’t understand the utter emptiness you feel.

[synqra]

[woahduderelax]

oh hey i still exist.

[isiyamor]

[amandajas]

[purplebuddhaproject]

https://www.instagram.com/pbuddhaproject/

[tangled-envisioning]

[arabwife]

this generation has made it seem like a man being loyal to his woman is a luxury, when in fact, such a thing should be standard

[purplebuddhaproject]

[euphxmia-pxtter-blog]

me: My boredom is eating me from the inside out and it’s awful I want to die also me: *thinks about doing something productive* *has panic attack* me: what the aCTUAL FUCK

[timotaychalamet]

[sangredesirena78463748-deactiva]

fun fact: any religion that takes the power of creation and life from women and gives it to men or to a male coded being, is inherently misogynistic

[benedictsmith]

Do you guys ever say the wrong thing in a conversation and then have it haunt you for months or years afterwards like a social anxiety poltergeist?

[laurierrose]

please don’t remind me

[tastefulbadthoughts]

I want every part of a relationship. I want the long hugs. I want unexpected kisses. I want to hold hands at the mall and stuff. I want people to know that your mine. I want lazy days with you. I want to spoil you. I want to go on cute dates to the movies or the aquarium or something like that. I want to be able to be myself around you. And I want you to be able to be yourself around me. I want to have a day were we just stay in bed all day and watch Netflix and eat our favorite foods. I want cuddles. I want to play with your hair and you play with my hair. I want to give you back rubs until you fall asleep. I want to goof around with you. I want to fall in love with you all over again. I just want you. Is that too much to ask for?

[bob-belcher]