TheWanderingOvary

Maybe I'm here, maybe I'm there. Who knows? Oh, shiny object! 

[thewanderingovary]

Don’t be an asshole today. Be better

[thewanderingovary]

Everything that can go wrong will...

In addition to everything that has already gone wrong this cycle. Things did not go very smoothly yesterday. First we get on the train to go to the hospital and, I kid you not, the train loses power in the tunnel and they say they are going to have to go backwards to our origin station. If we did that there was no way we were getting to the hospital anywhere near the time I am supposed to be there. After a 25 minute wait on a stick train, they come on and announce that we will be going forward through the tunnel after all. Thank goodness, we ended up only being 15 minutes late to the hospital.

 Then when the nurse was done taking my vitals she trying to put my IV in and apparently after she stuck me the catheter refused to thread and she couldn't fix it so we had to move to the other sides. Lol my veins have apparently had enough. On the other side she was like "did you know that you veins roll?" After she struggled for a while she finally got that arm to work.  Gotta love that extra stick.

 Once I got into the operating room the embryologist was late and I was just hanging out on the table with my legs up in the stirrups and my lady parts flapping in the wind. lol I literally cannot make this up. Finally after about 10 minutes and the embryologist asked me my name and birthday,  the anesthesiologist gave me the good stuff and even though I had to concentrate on falling asleep at least the nap was nice. Unfortunately I woke up while they were rolling me into recovery and was immediately cramping and in pain. The nurse was great and got me a heating pad right away but that was new and more difficult then last round.

 Lastly here's the kicker: after everything that's gone wrong and everything that's been just that much more difficult this round, we only got 12 eggs. I know lots of IVF patients would be thrilled with 12, but we had 23 last time and only ended up with 2 embryos, so there is a good chance that all of this was for nothing. Ugh. This cycle was nothing but bad mojo all around.

[thewanderingovary]

Round 2 Retrieval

Welp, it's here. Today is retrieval day for IVF round 2. As I've mentioned, this whole round has been more difficult then the last one and it hasn't gone to plan. I just don't feel hopeful for a great result. If the numbers are way off of last round i know I'm going to be crushed and pissed. It took 23 eggs to make 2 normal embryos last round, I know I need a big egg number to add to the reserves. I just have to realize that I'm doing everything I can and the rest is out of my control. I'll post the results once I have them.

[thewanderingovary]

Almost there

Had my early morning twanding, and during which the doctor said we will look at the bloodwork and see if we will trigger you tonight or tomorrow. I was surprised. I thought I had at least two more nights of shots. I was expecting a trigger on Monday night.

This whole round of IVF has been intensely frustrating. I was trying to schedule it so my ER would be on a Thursday or Friday. Now it is looking like it will be a Monday or Tuesday. Ugh. (Exactly what I was trying to avoid). Also after doubling my meds on day 1 &2 I’m surprised that they were shocked that my numbers skyrocketed so much. That caused me to have to go in for monitoring EVERY morning. Last round it was every other day for the first 6 then every day until retrieval. I forgot how draining the daily 5:30 am alarms are. Oh and I’ve only seen my actual doc once this whole time. I’ve had fill-in docs the rest of the appointments. I worry about a lack of consistency looking at the ultrasound.

I should have known better to attempt to plan out and take some control over an IVF round. I just hope the results make all this crap and my frustration worth it.

[thewanderingovary]

Round 2

Here we go again. I’m officially on Day 3 of IVF #2.  We are changing up the protocol since we are so “inefficient” at making genetically normal embryos, and by changing it i mean bumping it up. Fort the last go around on days 1 & 2 I took 150mg Follistim.  This time it is 225 Follistim AND 75mg of Menopur.  So yup, that’s pretty much double.  HA.  I’m fully expecting to feel like my ovaries are taking over my body in about 3 more days. 

Slipping back into the nightly shots routine has been fine. Having done this all before i’m not nearly as nervous as i was last time. Though it did not take long for me to feel like i just want to be alone with my netflix for most of the day.  Thankfully there will be no fresh transfer this time so no PIO shots. YEY! But so far, i am feeling good and ready to take on this next week like a boss. 

[thewanderingovary]

2 more down

One more week of the keto diet and 2 more pounds gone. I've officially made it back down to pre IVF weight, but if I can knock off 1 more pound I'll cross a milestone number so now I've got my sights set on that. Today we decided to go hiking, all 3 of us. I think the dog loved it the most. Hiking is something my hub had always enjoyed but had never really appealed to me. Today though I actually enjoyed it more then I thought I would. I actually wanted to stay on the woodsy trail more then on the road trail. It was a nice way to spend a morning and it certainly helped my crush my steps goal. (And dog is passed out. Lol)

[thewanderingovary]

Can't deny that it’s working...

Like so many women struggling with IF, my weight has been fluctuating throughout this whole journey. Since I began my IVF #1 process I've put on 10.5 pounds. Infertility is such a roller coaster emotionally and physically that I'm not surprised I've let my body go. When I was doing IVF and sticking myself with 4 needles a day (plus getting my blood taken), all I wanted was to be nice to myself in some other way. I just wanted to be comforted. So naturally I was reaching for food like mac and cheese and pasta and after the hell of PIO shots I'd give myself a reward (aka ice cream). Even in moderation all of this added up. (And the holidays didn't help either). 

 With IVF #2 just around the corner I decided it was time to make an adjustment. I wanted to drop some weight quickly so on Jan 2 I started following a keto diet, for 2 weeks. I'm not going to say I like it (I don't). I'm not going to say it's changing my life (it's not). I'm not going to say that I'm staying on it permanently (no way in hell). I will say that it's working. I weighed myself for the first time on Monday after a full week of being keto and I'm down 8.9 lbs. Considering that my goal is 10.5, I think that is a great start.

This diet is a hell of a challenge for me, so i am very excited for the 2 weeks to be up. The worst part has been breakfast. If i don’t have time to grab breakfast before i leave for work, it is very hard to find anything to eat on the go that is keto-friendly.  I do give the diet credit for opening my eyes to all the added sugars that are hidden is food.  Things like tomato sauce and chicken stock... I never thought to look out for added sugar before, but i do now.  Hopefully when i weigh myself next monday i’ll have hit my goal and i can ease in some fruits and other “natural carbs”. 

[rowansmemory-blog]

In Islam if you have a: miscarriage, still born or lose your child at a young age it is believed that on the Day of Judgement that same child testifies to God, holds your hands and takes you to Heaven, personally. Therefore we believe women who have been through such traumatic events are destined for Paradise.

(via rowansmemory-blog)

[npr]

Seven tussling puppies could bring a smile to anyone’s face. But one litter has a team of scientists beaming more than usual.

The puppies — five beagles and two “bockers,” or beagle-cocker spaniel mixes — are the first ever born through in vitro fertilization.

IVF has been used successfully in other animals — including, notably, humans — for decades. But despite numerous attempts, scientists had never succeeded in using IVF in dogs.

But this year, researchers at Cornell transferred 19 embryos into a female host dog. In July, after a scheduled cesarean section, they welcomed seven new puppies into the world.

7 Bundles Of Scientific Joy: ‘Test Tube Puppies’ Prove IVF Can Work In Dogs

Photos: Mike Carroll/Cornell University and Jeffrey MacMillan/Cornell University

[thewanderingovary]

Small changes

Since we are taking December off, I thought i would use the time to make some small adjustments to my lifestlylt to get just a little bit healthier before the new year.  I don’t want to venture into a new diet or work-out plan because those tend to cause havoc with my hormone levels. I just want to focus on some small things that may help.   My goal for this week is simple. Drink more water.  

Lately i have gotten off track and been barely putting down 20 ounces a day.  This week I want to focus on drinking more especially when i’m at work.  This is a small change that may help a lot. 

[buzzfeed]

How You Can Help Stop Fake News From Spreading On Facebook

[thewanderingovary]

this is really important.... 

[thewanderingovary]

Quiet

I’ve been quiet on here since our news of 2 healthy embryos. We are in a holding pattern, waiting for our WTF appointment with our RE. But we’ve decided that regardless, we are taking the rest of the year off. Hello there alcohol. Oh how I’ve missed you.

[thewanderingovary]

Two Negatives don't always make a Positive

Mondays are hard to start with. Well I was already expecting Monday to be a little harder because I would be getting negative beta results from our fresh transfer. I wasn't expecting the double dose of bad news we received. In addition to the negative beta we also got our PGS testing results back. Out of 8 blasts that were biopsied only 2 are genetically normal. It felt like getting punched in the gut. 2. That's it. I was really hoping that number would be 4, and I would have been over the moon if it was anything more. But 2. Ugh. This is probably going to change our plans a bit. Two small pieces of perspective for me are 1) I'm so happy we opted for PGS because that could have been 6 transfers with embryos that never had a chance, and 2) we got to find out the genders of the 2 viable embryos. Next steps for us is to have our wtf appointment with our RE and decide where we go from here. Either way we are going to take a break in December before moving along to the next step.

[thewanderingovary]

Transfer

I've been quiet on Tumblr since the retrieval. Trying to sort everything out and I've been on pins and needles waiting for the numbers. So here they are: we had 23 eggs retrieved, 20 were mature, 18 were fertilized with ICSI. On day 5 we had 5 maybe 6 left. We decided to transfer 1 yesterday on Day 5 and freeze the leftover. We will find out exactly how many made it today. I was not prepared for how serious the transfer process was. I was told "it's like an IUI" and the mock transfer I had was completely different. I wasn't it expecting to be so much of a hospital procedure. Gown, hair net, operating room, I was caught off guard. It was another situation were I told my husband not to bother coming then I was the only one there without their significant other. Also since my uterus is like a ninja warrior course, I had to have a full bladder and an ultrasound guided transfer. That part wasn't bad. But laying in a hospital bed afterwards for 30 minutes having to pee like a racehorse was agonizing. Also peeing hurt like a bitch and took forever. Ugh. I'm happy it is done. Now we get to move on to the worst part. Doing nothing for two weeks.

[chessys]

i dont know what im feeling but there is a lot of it

[chessys]

its depression

[thewanderingovary]

Yup

[mamabeartaketwo]

Hey all 💕💕 please reblog!!

I’m looking for more people to follow!!! I love how sweet you guys are and love reading your stories day to day. Watching our little babies grow together is awesome and getting first hand advice from this mumblr community is better yet. Sooo that being said if you are…

*ttc *wttc *Pregnant *A mother *A father *A really freaking awesome person ;)

Follow me so I can follow you back. If you do follow and I haven’t followed you back yet please let me know! I try my hardest to follow you all!

[thewanderingovary]

Retrieval Day!

Well it is finally here. It is egg retrieval day! We are on our way to the hospital now, stuck in traffic, but no biggie we have time. I'm not as nervous as I was expecting. I'm thinking that this feeling of calm will disappear once the surgery gets closer to happening. I do think that the experience of the hysteroscopy a couple of weeks ago is definitely helping to calm my nerves. As for right now, I'm excited and ready dying to know some numbers. Here we go!!!