I’ve got tons of feels about Yurippe. Because really, above all else, her story is the lifeblood of Angel Beats! and the strongest element to come from the series. And I’d like to talk some about the most intricate parts of said story, in particular how her theme song, the ED credits theme titled “Brave Song”, factors in and sets the tone for Yurippe’s entire journey.
To make what was since day one apparent to me apparent here…Yurippe is Lucifer. Yes, she is Lucifer, not literally so, but she’s very much a Luciferian figure in this tale, someone with a monumental sense of pride, strong feelings of passion, lots of charisma, and the balls to try and take on a being so high above her level. She’s decided that God is an unfair tyrant who should pay the highest penalty for allowing the life He created to go to shit and should be rendered obsolete to eternity going forward so that humanity can have all the power to decide everything for itself, as though that would put an end to all pain and misery in the world. Half the time Yurippe doesn’t even bother to disguise her petty vendetta as anything more noble, outright admitting she wants to take personal revenge on God for allowing her siblings to be unfairly murdered, allowing her life to take such a downturn, and seemingly sticking her in Purgatory after said life had come to an untimely end. Her main adversary is a girl she names “Angel” since she believes her to be an agent of God. She puts “Rebelling Against God” right there on the SSS logo. This girl’s a fall from grace all unto herself. She is a fiend.
“Brave Song” thus has this very somber, melancholic, downright unnerving feeling to it despite having the presentation of being a heroic anthem. The image the song is always set to is Yurippe standing alone in a tranquil, composed state as all of her followers in the SSS Battlefront appear behind her one by one. And the lyrics speak of walking alone far ahead of everyone else, being strong and unafraid, a nihilistic view of life and death, fighting on and never showing tears. This is a villain song that thinks it’s a hero song, fitting the character.
Yurippe’s trajectory really starts to change after the fight with Naoi. After she’d momentarily been confronted by an illusion of the siblings whose killing she refuses to let go as a burden on her, after witnessing Otonashi solve the problem through asserting that all lives have justification and value, and showing simple compassion and empathy towards Naoi. She’s not completely changed yet, as she still has her moments of being her usual evil self (”I can slit your throat with my spare knife if you’d like!”), but she’s notably more mellow than she’d been beforehand. But it’s the fallout of the crisis with the clones, in which Otonashi talks Kanade into returning to her position on the student council and posing as the Battlefront’s enemy while he works to get his friends to come to terms with their lives and pass on, that truly starts the big shift in Yurippe, as she figured out what was really going on from the start.
Which eventually brings Yurippe to the conflict with the Shadows. Having not shaken off her “I can fight alone” mentality, Yurippe goes off on her own in search of who and what’s sourcing the Shadows and where. But years of having fought like this begin taking their toll on Yurippe as she takes her literal descent down underground, constantly getting hounded by Shadows all the while. One Shadow eventually gets her and pulls her into it’s illusion, which would start the process of turning her into a soulless, compliant NPC should she give into it as all others have. The illusion shows her the ideal school life she could have, placing her right in the middle of a day in a prettied up version of her life with new friends and no burdens. Yurippe states she finds this life wonderful…but it isn’t her life. The only thing truly pertaining to her life in that classroom is her herself, as herself, as Yurippe, with all the faults and personal baggage that comes with being herself. So she makes a speech about why she can’t accept any better life and has to keep fighting, going into her rage against the Heavens as it goes on and she speaks of feeling forced to accept the one shot at God-given life she has regardless of how cruel and unfair she thinks that life was, and why this too is something she can’t accept. As she does so, she asks “Don’t you understand, sir?”, but she’s not addressing the illusionary teacher at this point, as he’s no longer there. The “Sir” she’s really speaking out to is God. And when it reaches this point, we see the illusion has come down and are shown Yurippe’s actual life as she perceives it- an empty classroom with no friends and no signs of happiness in sight. And it’s all tinted with the color red, as to symbolize all the evil and rage that this girl has been carrying with her in her heart. Red like the blood of her little siblings that she feels is on her and she hasn’t washed away. Red like Hell. Red like the Devil.
Once Yurippe has passed through the door of the Programmer and is inside the room that controls this world’s system with all of it’s stolen computers, she’s at the end point of her descent. In the one-on-one talk she has with the Programmer’s NPC that runs the system, the NPC reveals that the Shadows are part of a clean-up program that’s launched whenever the amount of love in Purgatory exceeds a certain amount, for if too much love takes root and is allowed to blossom, the purgatorial world would turn into an eternal Eden and the Programmer, for whatever reason, did not want that. He states that Yurippe could seize the chance to choose the path that the Programmer didn’t choose - run the system herself, harness the power of love for herself, and essentially become God of this world. As this idea is running through Yurippes’s head, a demented grin spreads across her face and she goes laughing mad as the temptation rushes over her and entices her darker side with the idea that she’s finally won, that she could take God’s place, defeat Angel, and become invincible with this system at her disposal. The moment is terrifying, for this is the moment where Yurippe might take the big, fate-deciding step of her entire existence. This is where she might fully evolve from Lucifer to Satan. Better to reign in Hell Purgatory than serve in Heaven, after all.
But instead, the temptation passes her by as quickly as it had come and she states she could never make that choice. By declining, she puts her foot down firmly on a different course, stating the reason she fought her way here was to protect all the friends she’s made in this world, all the people she’s come to love as though they were family. This confirms that the source of all the blossoming love was in fact Yurippe and the love she’d come to have for all her friends, even Kanade. When the Programmer NPC asks if she’s certain of this course since she does have an eternity’s worth of time to wait and decide, Yurippe alludes to her past trauma with one hell of a Pre-Asskicking One-Liner: “Us humans? We don’t even have the patience to wait 10 whole minutes for something!” and then starts shooting up all the computers with her two pistols, finishing by shooting two bullets into both the final computer and the NPC who sits in front of it. Yurippe then sinks to the floor, thinking to herself that though she’s succeeded at what she was aiming to do and more or less finished her mission, she considers this a personal failure on her part because she came to love all her friends as much as she loved her dead siblings, to the point where she’d forfeit any chance at revenge on God in favor of saving everyone who matters to her now. She then starts feeling all the bad feelings inside her, everything that was keeping her fighting in this world, starting to fade away from her, being replaced by feelings far stronger and more positive. And then she succumbs to a near-death experience where she’s given a vision of her siblings from Heaven, telling her that it’s okay to stop fighting now, that’s she’s done enough and that they love and appreciate her anyway for how hard she’s worked in spite of her failings. And at this, Yurippe finds she can’t hold it in any more. She finally allows herself to break down and bawl.
What is so damn powerful and meaningful about this is the sense you get that Yurippe from the start of the show absolutely would have taken the Programmer up on his offer to play God over Purgatory, would have gone full-on Satan. But the Yurippe who was presented with such an offer at the end of the show is a very different Yurippe from who she’d been at the start. She, who’d started down her path on a mission born of hatred, had come to a point where she felt so much love for everyone around her, and that love was the driving force behind her actions in the continued fight for Purgatory. And ultimately she chose that love over fulfilling her hateful crusade against God, the laws of the universe, and the unfairness of her life. She threw away any hope of accomplishing the fool’s errand mission she’d wanted to accomplish, and instead she accomplished the mission she needed to accomplish. As a result, she finally arrives at a point of accepting her life and herself as is, just as her siblings and friends accept her and love her in spite of all the failings she’d long sought to make amends for. In the moment where this person so easily could’ve made herself a true villain, she became a hero.
Bringing this home is the credits for Episode 12. It starts off normally, though “Brave Song” had already begun playing over the episode’s final scene that sees Yurippe’s arc reach it’s zenith. But then, out of nowhere, Yui is there. And so is Iwasawa, and the members of Girl’s Dead Monster who’d passed on at the start. And everyone in the SSS Battlefront that we find out in the next episode ended up passing on after their fight with the Shadows. Yurippe becomes surrounded.by everyone, all the friends she fought for and who fought for her. Whom she loves and who love her. The song seems to start over at it’s first verse, but then goes quiet, and then the music swells as the song’s final chorus plays, with new lyrics and different background instrumentals that set a different mood and gives off a different feeling from before. This one is a joyful feeling. A heroic feeling. A feeling of triumph. A feeling that says “Mission accomplished. We made it. We did it. It’s done.” And so now that it’s done, now that the fucked up SoB who’d been misusing the world of departed souls for his own vision is finally gone, Yuri’s lyrics state she can finally let go of the type of “strength” that had been driving her forward, can finally freely show all the tears and vulnerabilities of a normal girl.
As reward, Yurippe finds a special message written on her graduation diploma.
You’re our hero, Yurippe. You rose from your own darkness and found light again.
Hey everyone, here's chapter 2 of Grey Stains. Our first glimpse of Hogwarts, and backstory for Astrid! I hope you enjoy it! I will also update my masterpost with this story, so if you want to find chapter 1, look there or check my ‘grey stains’ tag.
One thing I would like to address here are the side characters. Pretty much all side characters like professors and classmates, are lifted from other franchises that I enjoy. However, you shouldn't feel obligated to know all (or any) of them to understand my story. They're simply there to add some color to the scenes, and because I think having Hiro and Rayla is more interesting and easy to remember for you, the reader, than Ravenclaw OC #1 and Gryffindor OC #2. So if you don't know a character in the story, I hope the context explains enough about them. If you do know the character, I hope you enjoy some of the in-jokes I put in. After this chapter their presence should be less overwhelming, as the story will focus more on Hiccup and Astrid proper.
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"And we're here, with fifteen minutes to spare! Those Muggle 'taxis' are faster than I thought!" Astrid's uncle Finn said as he led the way into King's Cross Station. It was filled with people, and the loud announcements and screeching of the trains made Astrid's head hurt. Her owl, a yellow-blue bird with the powers of a Blast-ended Skrew who she named Stormfly, screeched loudly, and she hoped none of the Muggles would notice the puff of smoke coming out of Stormfly's beak.
"I keep telling you, the Muggles are smarter than you assume, but you never believe me!" Aunt Erika said. They kept bickering about transportation as they walked onto platform 9. Astrid recognized a man standing there, despite him wearing Muggle clothes. It was Mr. Cruz, one of the aurors working with her uncle. He was subtly guiding wizard families towards the column dividing platforms 9 and 10.
Finn and Erika stopped their argument to greet him, and a minute later they got the signal to go. Astrid looked at the solid brick wall in front of her, and she suddenly felt scared. No, no, she can't be scared. She's gonna be a proud Gryffindor, she has to be brave! So she gritted her teeth and ran right after her guardians.
Although she may have closed her eyes before reaching the wall. There was a brief sensation of her moving through what felt like liquid, but then the sounds warped and changed. The Muggle talk and modern trains vanished, replaced by the sounds of magic and the hissing of a steam engine.
"Alright girl, are you ready? Oh, you grew up so quickly! Don't be afraid to send us letters, okay? It's normal to feel a bit lonely at first! But I'm sure you'll make lots of friends!" Erika said, rubbing her cheek.
"Thanks, Aunt Erika. I'll try," she said as Finn took her suitcase and lifted it onto the train. Astrid wanted to protest, say that she could do it herself. But before she could open her mouth he turned to her with that look that meant he was going to say something important. He kneeled, putting himself a little below her eye level, but she still felt small.
"Astrid… I'm sorry your parents couldn't be here to see you off. Or your sister. But I know that your mom and dad and Celia would be so, so proud of you. And so is your brother Max, even if he couldn't make it to London because of his work. And we are so proud of you too. You know, after the Battle… there was so much destruction. So much death, and it felt so hopeless. But we took you in, and in you we saw hope. That war ended because people like your parents and your siblings stood up and fought against evil. They fought to give you a better world to grow up in. And I know you'll work to fight the evils of your time. It's different now, you know. Less open. Don't forget that some people still have those… evil beliefs, even if they won't say it out loud. But I know you'll do the right thing. You're strong," he said, putting his hands on her shoulders.
Astrid tried to look him in the eye, but she felt tears appear, and she dropped her head trying to hide it. She wasn't so sure if Max was proud of her. They had barely spoken in years. He was abroad, studying Healing in Italy, and rarely replied to letters. She rarely felt like sending him letters either. They had never been super close, Astrid had liked her sister Celia more back when she was alive, and six months after the Battle of Hogwarts Max had left Britain, finishing his NEWTs at Beauxbatons and traveling Europe ever since.
As she looked around, seeing parents hugging their children, siblings teasing each other, laughing together, she wanted to shout that it wasn't fair. Her family had been torn apart by Death Eaters, and these people were all perfectly fine?
But no, she couldn't do that. Like Uncle Finn always said, she should be grateful she has what she has. Entire families had been slaughtered, Muggleborns tortured until they were left permanently insane at St. Mungo's, babies killed and turned into Inferi and other monsters. Her pain was nothing compared to that.
So she forced herself to smile and nod.
"I'll fight for the light, Uncle Finn. Like you taught me! I'll be a brave Gryffindor like you and Dad and Celia! Not to mention Harry Potter and Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger!"
"Alright, little lion, just remember it's okay if you end up in another house. Of course, I know you want to end up in Gryffindor like your heroes. Just remember the other houses did great things too. Hell, your brother was a Slytherin and he fought alongside Neville Longbottom for the entire battle!" Aunt Erika said, and Astrid rolled her eyes.
"I know, Auntie! Doesn't mean they're not dorks," she said. Behind her aunt and uncle she could see the boy from the wand shop walk past, with his messy brown hair and expensive robes. A bald man with two prosthetic limbs walked alongside him. His father? They didn't look related. Something about the boy made her nervous. When she saw him at Ollivander's, waving wand after wand with no effect, she had thought he might be a squib. But if he was going to Hogwarts he should be magical, right?
After some goodbyes and awkward hugs Astrid boarded the train. She walked through the corridor, checking for any empty cabins but not finding any. Eventually she found one with three girls of her age, and decided she might as well get started on making friends.
"Hello!" she said, trying to seem confident as she opened the door and pulled her suitcase inside. The white-haired girl turned to her, revealing strange purple markings under her eyes.
"Hi, I'm Rayla, and these are Merida and Pidge. Merida and I already knew each other, we grew up in the same town," the girl said in a thick Scottish accent, gesturing to two girls who both had their own style of wild hair. Merida had a wild mane of curly bright red hair, while Pidge had short dirty blonde hair that stuck out in all directions and looked like she cut it herself.
"I'm Astrid," she said, sitting down next to Pidge.
They easily got to talking, and Astrid learned that Rayla's family situation was similar to hers: Her parents had gone missing during the war, and she was raised by a family friend called Runaan. Pidge was Muggleborn, but her brother Matt was magical too, and was currently a Ravenclaw prefect. Merida was from a very old wizarding house, and her father lost a leg fighting evil creatures in the war.
"So what do you think you'll be when you grow up? My parents keep trying to push me into politics, that I'll have to keep managing our ancient house, but I say sod that!" Merida said, her accent even thicker than Rayla's.
"Probably inventing. I'm good at figuring out tech and stuff. I'm curious if I can use magic in Muggle computers," Pidge said. Astrid wasn't sure what she was talking about. Before she could ask, Rayla spoke up.
"This is probably weird, but Runaan is part of an elite group of aurors, and he kind of expects me to join him. Not sure if I want to, though," she said, rolling her eyes.
"My uncle is an auror too. That's what I always expected to be. Never really considered anything else. I want to fight evil like my family did," Astrid said, trying not to think about how often Uncle Finn had come home with dead eyes after another raid. Those were evenings he wouldn't say a word. He'd just grab a bottle of firewhiskey and slowly empty it while listening to old songs on the radio.
"I'll stick to making weapons for you, I guess. Way safer than being on the frontlines," Pidge chuckled, adjusting her round glasses. Astrid wondered if she knew they looked just like Harry Potter's glasses.
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"Come on, Gobber! Aren't I supposed to make friends? Meet people? Doesn't Dad always say networking is important?" Hiccup exclaimed, gesturing at the locked door of their cabin.
"Your father gave me strict instructions not to let you out of my sight until you're safe at Hogwarts. He may not be my direct boss, but you know I can't ignore an order from him! He's got influence! That curse on the Defense Against the Dark Arts teaching position is finally gone, and I'll be damned if I lose the job anyway because you can't stay put for a few hours!" Gobber shouted, pointing at Hiccup with his prosthetic hand.
"What does he think is gonna happen? Death Eaters kidnapping me? People angry about his policies attacking me? What even for? My dad is the most apolitical politician ever, he doesn't care about any ideology. All he cares about is slaying dragons," Hiccup said, looking out the window at London disappearing behind them.
"Oh, don't play dumb. You know what this is about. Stoick is worried that the Red Death will attack the train. I figured that you of all people should understand that," Gobber said, digging in his bag with his good hand.
"You know I don't live my life cowering in fear of dragons every moment, right? My dad may be obsessed, but I'm not. It's ridiculous. Like that Red Death would actually attack us," Hiccup said, looking up at the cloudy sky. Could dragons be hiding up there?
"Hey, I agree that Stoick is paranoid about dragons, but he's not wrong about the Red Death. It has killed fourteen muggles and three mages in the past year. Despite nearly all the Department of Magical Creatures' resources being devoted to hunting it, it has eluded your father for years," Gobber said as he pulled a chess set from his bag. Hiccup looked away from the window just in time to see the man take his wand out and placing it on the bench beside him.
"I just… He's always locked me up at home in fear of it, and I figured that now that I get to go to Hogwarts I'd finally be… free. But he's still locking me up," Hiccup muttered, glancing at his own wand. According to the eighth wandmaker they had visited this summer, in Beijing, it was the best wand money could buy. Hiccup had tried thousands of wands in shops all over the world, and none had chosen him, so Stoick had bought him this. Maybe at Hogwarts he'd learn how to use it.
"Oh, don't think like that. It's just until we reach the castle. You'll be safe there, and I won't have to babysit you anymore," Gobber chuckled, and Hiccup tried to smile. "Now, since we're stuck together we might as well pass the time with some chess!" the man said, laying the board on the table as the pieces jumped out of the box, taking their positions with loud boasts and battlecries.
They played for a while. Gobber won the first game, and they took a break when a nice lady knocked on the door to ask if they wanted any candy. Gobber bought a large brick of chocolate for them both. The sugar seemed to make Hiccup more alert, and he easily won the next three games.
"Looks like you'll be a Ravenclaw with those brains. What house would you like to be in?" Gobber asked as his broken black pieces put themselves back together with loud groans and whimpers. Hiccup shrugged.
"Haven't really thought about it. I guess everyone always says Gryffindor, but I'm not so sure. Maybe Slytherin, to piss off Dad," he said as his king and queen led his white pieces back onto the field.
"Honestly I think he'd be more disappointed if you ended up a Hufflepuff. He often complains they're 'too nice' and 'care too much about dangerous creatures'," Gobber said. "But with the way you're slaughtering me, I don't think you're nice enough for that."
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As he climbed out of the rickety boat Hiccup didn't feel like Hogwarts was a very magical place. It was raining, and the summer warmth was blown away by a cold wind.
"Why did we have to go all the way to London for the train if Hogwarts is right next door? And now a boat! I hate water!" a Scottish voice from the next boat said, and Hiccup looked over to see a white-haired girl looking sick as she jumped onto land. Her robes were simple and sturdy compared to his gilded silk robes that did nothing to keep him warm.
"Such weird boats. Ours back home are much sturdier!" a girl with long brown hair said as she climbed out beside Hiccup. "I'm Katara, by the way. Katara Waters."
"I'm Hiccup," he said loudly to be heard over the howling wind. They hadn't had much of a chance to speak during the boat ride.
"Alright, head inside now, let's hurry!" Gobber shouted, helping a black-haired girl out of one of the boats. She looked very annoyed, and when Hiccup looked closer he noticed her eyes were blank and milky. For a second the dragon's eyes from that day in Gringotts flashed in his mind. Katara waved her wand and did a strange movement with her other hand, and the rain above them was diverted, like she was holding a large umbrella. Hiccup gladly took the opportunity to look away from the blind girl and focus on something else.
"You can do that already?" he asked, fingers rolling over his own wand on his belt.
"It's magic from my tribe, I learned it from my gran-gran," she said, continuing the odd spell.
"I thought Hagrid was supposed to guide the first-years?" one of the boys asked as the last of the boats docked, water splashing over the side as its occupants jumped out.
"Hagrid retired years ago, he moved to France. I'm the groundskeeper now," Gobber said, before casting a charm that lit up a muddy path. The group hobbled along for a few minutes until they reached the front gates of the castle. Gobber waved his wand, and the gate opened. They gladly ran inside, slipping and sliding on the tiles. They barely had time to appreciate the enormous hall with its marble stairs before a familiar voice spoke up.
"Ah, you're here. Welcome, first-years, to Hogwarts!" a tall woman with grey hair said. Hiccup recognized her from one of his dad's ministry parties.
"I am Professor McGonagall, Headmistress of Hogwarts and Transfiguration teacher," she continued as the kids gathered around the enormous marble stairs she was standing on. Once they were all lined up she talked a bit about how houses worked, and that they should obey the rules. Hiccup's mind wandered, and with it his eyes. Next to him was Hiro, the boy from the wand shop, who looked as bored as him. Next to Hiro was a bald boy with arrow-shaped tattoos on his head and arms. Despite his strange appearance he looked giddy and excited. And at the far end he saw Astrid. She suddenly noticed him staring and frowned, and he quickly dropped his gaze.
"Now, let us enter the Great Hall so you can be Sorted!" McGonagall finished her speech, before passing through the line of first-years to a large door to their right.
Although he had heard stories and read books about this hall, he still gasped at the sight of it. The ceiling reflected the storm clouds outside, though no rain fell on the floating candles and tables filled with precious silverware. Hundreds of students dressed in similar black robes sat along the 4 tables, and they all looked at him and the other first-years entering. At the far end was the staff table on the raised platform. He could see Gobber near the center of it, giving him a quick wave with his prosthetic hand. He tried to smile back, though it was hard when his stomach churned at the sight of the tattered old hat sitting on a tiny old chair.
The blind girl was the only one not gasping at the amazing room. Instead she just kept walking forward alongside McGonagall, leading the other first-years towards the Sorting Hat.
Eventually they were all crowded near the chair with the hat, and it began to sing. Some of the Muggleborns gasped and looked fearful at first, but the hat quickly reassured them as it explained its purpose and the characteristics of the four houses.
"Alright, when I call your name, step forward, sit on the chair, and I'll put the hat on you. It will then sort you into your House. Firstly… Avatar, Aang!" McGonagall said, lifting the hat with one hand, a scroll in her other. The bald boy with tattoos he noticed earlier stepped forward with light steps and sat down, and McGonagall lowered the hat over the large blue arrow on his forehead.
"HUFFLEPUFF!" it shouted barely a second later. The boy jumped up, higher than Hiccup knew someone could jump, and ran over to the table that had exploded with applause.
"Beifong, Toph!" The blind girl stepped forward, somehow noticing the small step between them and the chair, and sitting down without help. Hiccup wondered how she did that.
The hat was quiet for a minute as Toph grimaced, before eventually announcing "GRYFFINDOR!"
Butterfly, Star!"
"That's me, that's me! Hi, Mr. Hat! Ooh, ooh, are you going to look into my mind? That's soooo cool!" a girl with heart-shaped cheek marks and blonde hair past her knees screamed as she ran forward, knocking over several first-years with surprising strength. She had an enormous grin as the Hat was placed over her head, hiding her wide eyes from the room.
For a second the grin lowered, before returning full-force. She nodded wildly, making McGonagall reach out her hand to steady the hat.
"GRYFFINDOR!" it suddenly boomed. The table next to them applauded loudly as the girl took off the hat and ran to her new house.
The sorting went on like that for a while, and Hiccup had trouble keeping track of all the names. There was a small commotion at the Ravenclaw table when Pidge Gunderson was called forward and sorted there, but it was quickly shushed.
Hiccup didn't recognize any of the kids that were sorted until "Hamada, Hiro" was sorted into Ravenclaw. Hiccup frowned at that. Wasn't he supposed to be before Hamada, since he's a Haddock? He was about to raise his hand when "Hofferson, Astrid" was announced, and at the sight of the fierce blonde walking forward with resolute steps he forgot what he was thinking about.
The hat was quiet for a very long time, at least five minutes, during which Astrid balled her hands into tighter and tighter fists. Even with her eyes hidden by the hat's brim she was clearly angry.
'GRYFFINDOR!" the hat eventually shouted, and she didn't even wait for McGonagall to lift the hat. Astrid jumped to her feet and tossed it to the chair, before stomping to the applauding table.
Hiccup's musings on what Astrid could be angry about were interrupted by McGonagall scraping her throat and announcing the next name.
"Horrendous, Hiccup!"
The tension that had filled the room at Astrid's anger snapped in the form of collective laughter.
"That's his actual name?"
"Don't know what's worse, the first or last name!"
"Wow, I feel sorry for the house that gets that one!"
"What were his parents thinking?"
Hiccup could feel his cheeks heat up in shame as he slowly stepped forward.
"That's not my last name! It's Haddock! Horrendous is my middle name!" he shouted, trying to be heard over the laughter which only increased at his words.
McGonagall narrowed her eyes as she checked her scroll again.
"You are- SILENCE!" The one word instantly stopped all the laughter in the hall. "You are listed as Horrendous in our records-" Snickers and soft laughs again echoed through the room, though they quickly stopped when she glared.
"We'll figure this out later. Either way, Mr. Hiccup, step forward and be Sorted."
He slowly nodded, feeling the stare of every person in the room on him, and sat down on the chair. Then the hat slid over his eyes, and it was suddenly completely silent.
...Until a raspy voice whispered in his ear.
"Who do we have here? Mistaken identity? Someone messing with the records? Well, let me tell you, you do belong here at Hogwarts, even if your wand doesn't work and someone got confused about your name. But where to put you?"
Hiccup jerked away from the voice and opened his mouth to ask how the hat knew all of this, but before he could even draw a breath the voice whispered in his other ear.
"Don't bother talking out loud, this is all in your head. No need for anyone else to hear this. Now, where oh where shall you go? A kind heart, loyal and forgiving. Not too lazy either. You'd make a decent Hufflepuff. But on the other hand, what a brain! Eager to learn, and I can see a spark of genius in you. You could have new perspectives. Maybe Ravenclaw?"
Hiccup's thoughts raced as he awaited the hat's verdict. A sweatdrop slid over his forehead. The presence gave him a headache.
"You're obviously not a Slytherin, you don't have a deceitful or ambitious bone in your body. Brave though, even if you don't know it yet. A good sense of right and wrong, and deep inside there's fighting spirit. What glorious cause would bring that out? You could be a great hero, you know, and Gryffindor would lead you to glory. All the kids these days want to be in the house of the amazing Harry Potter and his friends, but you could truly follow their path," it said, and Hiccup squeezed his eyes shut.
He was about to agree. Gryffindor was the house of the heroes, the good guys, the house that would please his father, the house the girl who made him feel all funny and light went to.
But then he remembered three Gryffindors on the back of a dragon. Three Gryffindors who everyone called heroes. Gryffindors who let a dragon run amok and kill his mother.
If that was heroism, Hiccup didn't think he wanted it.
"Oh, what's this? Now this is interesting. You might be the first kid I've seen in 7 years who doesn't worship those three. The complete opposite of that previous… never mind that, I'm not supposed to talk about other Sortings. Anyway, this is an interesting form of bravery in itself! But in your case, I think you'd better go to… RAVENCLAW!"
The hat was pulled from Hiccup's head, and the sounds of the Great Hall returned. There was muted clapping from the Ravenclaw table, not nearly as much as for the other students, while the other tables looked relieved. He awkwardly walked to the Ravenclaws, stumbling on the small step, though he managed to avoid falling on his face. He quickly sat down next to Hiro as McGonagall called forth "Jorgenson, Scott" and attention diverted away from him. A girl with round glasses and short hair reached out her hand across the table to him.
"Hey there. I'm Pidge Gunderson. Well, my brother here would say I'm Katie Holt, but that's not what the official records say now, do they Matt?" she said, pointing to a boy several years older, with similar hair and glasses who was sitting next to her. Hiccup awkwardly took her hand and shook it.
"How did you even hack the records here to change your name?! They're all in parchment! It's not like they have computers or internet!" Matt shouted, though he silenced himself when the hat proclaimed "SLYTHERIN" and "Katolis, Callum" was called forward.
"Oh, I have my ways. Still, you owe me 50 quid," Pidge (or was it Katie?) said, snickering. Hiccup wasn't sure how to respond to the bickering siblings.
"Fine, but I still don't understand why you did it. This will come back to bite you eventually," Matt said, rolling his eyes and digging in his pockets, pulling out a few bills of muggle money.
"Let me guess how you did it… You intercepted the communications between the ministry and Hogwarts, probably via Floo," Hiro said, and Pidge chuckled before nodding.
"Yup. Just had to figure out a charm to modify the ink inside the envelope."
"Oh man, I can see you two are already becoming partners in crime. What did I tell you, Tadashi? Hopeless. Our siblings are supervillains in the making!" Matt called out to a tall boy several seats down. He started to reply when the hat shouted "RAVENCLAW" and a boy with messy brown hair and a thick book on a belt slung around his shoulder walked over to sit next to Pidge.
"Hi, I'm Callum. Muggleborn, but my dad is high in muggle government so he already knew about magic," the boy introduced himself. Pidge quickly introduced herself, explaining that she and Matt were Muggleborn as well.
"I'm half-blood. Muggle mother, wizard father. They both died when I was 3," Hiro said, and Hiccup turned to look at him. Murdered by Death Eaters?
Hiro must have noticed the question in his eyes. "No, nothing to do with the war. Broom-flying accident. Dumb stuff like that still happens during wartime," he said lightly, though something in his face fell anyway. Down the table Tadashi frowned.
"My mom died during the war too," Hiccup said, looking down.
"May I ask what happened?" Matt asked softly. Hiccup sighed.
"A dragon killed her," he simply said, not in the mood to explain the role of Harry Potter in it.
"I'm sorry," Callum said, just as the hat announced another Ravenclaw. Hiccup moved to clap loudly, grateful for the distraction. A boy with black hair with faint blue streaks sat down next to Hiccup.
"Hey there, I'm Varian! I'm from a little village in Wales called Old Corona. Muggleborn, hoping to figure out how magic fits into physics and chemistry!" he said, lifting a hand covered by a huge lab glove to shake Pidge's hand.
Hiro, Pidge, and Varian immediately started an animated discussion of muggle science, and Hiccup couldn't help but feel left out somehow. He caught Callum's gaze, and they shared a chuckle at their housemates.
"I'm more an artist than a scientist myself," Callum said, and Hiccup nodded, before turning to watch the rest of the sorting. Not many kids were left. He noticed Katara, the girl from the boat who could direct the rain, waiting next to… someone with purple hair and pointed ears. Hiccup wasn't really sure if the person was a boy or a girl.
"Vaarsuvius!" McGonagall called, and they stepped forward.
"Finally. You strange cranial accessory, let us purvey the different possibilities of social company I shall have to compete with in my quest for Ultimate Arcane Power!" they said loudly before putting the hat on.
"That one sure looks like to hear his own voice," Callum chuckled, and Hiccup had to agree.
"RAVENCLAW!"
Hiccup wasn't surprised after Vaarsuvius' declaration, and joined the rest of his house in applause.
Welcome, fellow wizards and other arcane casters! My name is Vaarsuvius, from the ancient village of Ivyleaf on the Western Continent! Former apprentice of Aarindarius, who also moved here to Albion to teach the noble art of Arithmancy!" they said as they sat down next to Callum.
"If it's okay, I'll just call you 'V'," Pidge said. Vaarsuvius simply shrugged at that.
"So you're from America? Me and my brother are as well, but we moved here because my aunt could set up a cafe in Hogsmeade," Hiro said as Katara was sorted into Gryffindor. Realizing the Sorting was over, all conversations ended.
An old grumpy looking man took the chair and hat away, and McGonagall moved to the center where it had stood.
"Welcome, students, to another year at Hogwarts! The usual rules still apply, but I must announce an extra rule coming from the Ministry of Magic via our groundskeeper and professor for Defense Against the Dark Arts, Gobber Belch: Due to the increased threat coming from the so-called Red Death dragon, students are no longer permitted to walk the grounds after dark. I must remind everyone that the Forbidden Forest is forbidden because of its many dangers, dangers which have increased in recent years. Do not be foolish and risk your life in there. There's plenty of excitement in the castle itself," McGonagall spoke. There was some nervous chuckling here and there, but overall people seemed very uncomfortable with this warning. Was this that unusual?
As far as Hiccup knew, his father had announced more warnings and declarations and rules about the Red Death every year since its first appearance 5 years ago. Maybe they hadn't reached Hogwarts until now.
"But let us not be saddened by such dark thoughts on such a happy evening. A great feast has been prepared, so let us enjoy it!" With those words, piles of food appeared on the golden plates, and the scientists finally stopped their discussion on perpetual motion in order to eat.
A flash of light flickered on the walls, and Hiccup looked up to see lightning strike across the enchanted ceiling. For a fraction of a second he thought he could see the shadow of a dragon inside a cloud, but then it was gone, and he shook his head and forced himself to focus on eating mashed potatoes and deciphering Vaarsuvius' long-winded speeches.
--------------------------------
"This portrait is the entrance to Gryffindor Tower. We have a password, which currently is 'Primum non nocere'. Please do not share this password with anyone from another house. While we encourage friendships between houses, you should be meeting in shared spaces like the library, the grounds, the great hall, or unused classrooms. There are some plans for a 'common common room', but it will likely take a while for that to happen," a prefect explained to Astrid and the other first-year Gryffindors.
Astrid didn't feel the need to be friends with other houses for now. Of the three girls she met on the train, two had joined her in Gryffindor, and it wasn't like she had bonded much with Pidge.
The portrait of the fat lady swung open, revealing a chamber filled with poofy armchairs, thick rugs, and wooden tables.
"Ugh, carpeting. I prefer solid wooden or stone floors, they're much less fuzzy to see through," Toph, the blind girl, said, and Astrid noticed for the first time she was barefoot.
"Up here are the dorms. Left for the boys, right for the girls. No mingling. You'll keep the same dorm for the 7 years you are here. You got lucky, you get the closest ones, so you don't have to climb another six flights of stairs. These are also the dorms Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Neville Longbottom and the other heroes of the Battle of Hogwarts used during their time here, so you can feel a bit closer to their glory, I suppose. Your belongings have already been delivered to your dorms. Owls are in the Owlery, you can visit them after class. Breakfast is between 8 and 9 AM. It is your own responsibility to be on time, but perhaps you can work out a system with your roommates to wake up and go down together," the prefect said, gesturing at two open doors through which she could see steep stairs.
"I expect all of you to bring glory to yourselves and to Gryffindor. This means doing well in class, going the extra mile for more points, but also by helping students who are struggling, whether they are in this house or not. True chivalry doesn't look at someone's colors. That is all for now. I advise you to go to sleep quickly, as you have a long day ahead tomorrow. Any questions?"
At the reminder of sleep Astrid yawned. She hadn't had much sleep last night, too excited to go here, and she desperately wanted to catch up.
However, Rayla didn't seem to agree.
"I heard there's a dueling club or something? How can we join?" she asked.
"There is, though it's rare that it accepts first-years. You'll have to talk to Professor Flitwick, he runs it. If he's impressed with your performance in his Charms class, he might let you join. Once in, you get to compete with your fellow duelists for the highest rank. If you want to become an auror a good duelist rank helps you a lot," the prefect explained, and Astrid woke up at that.
If she wanted to be good at dueling she needed to be rested, however. So she led the way up the girl's stairs and into the first room labeled "First-years". In there she easily found her suitcase on the bed closest to the window, and laid down. She was tempted to fall asleep like that, but she forced herself to unpack her pajamas and toothbrush as the other girls walked in.
"Ooh, ooh, this looks nice! Can I have this bed, can I? Do you think I can make an extra closet?" Star Butterfly was as loud and energetic as she had been the entire evening.
"I don't think we're allowed to modify anything, Star. But you can take that bed. Toph, how about you take this one near the door, that way you don't have to walk through our stuff when you get up," Katara said, making Toph scoff.
"I can handle myself, Sugar Queen," she muttered, but still took the suggested bed. The two had gotten off to a bad start when Katara offered to help her eat and Toph responded by magically shifting the table to make food fly into her face.
"Can you two stop bickering so we can sleep?" Merida groaned.
"Fine," Toph said, and Astrid figured it was a good thing the blind girl couldn't see Katara roll her eyes.
"How do we wake up on time tomorrow?" Rayla asked, digging through her own bags.
"I can set an alarm with my wand!" Star said, showing off her strange wand. She tapped it, and with a cloud of pink smoke the round top part suddenly had a clock face.
"What kind of wand even is that?" Merida asked, lifting her own simple wooden one.
"It's the Butterfly wand! Has been in my family foreeeeveeeeeer!" Star said, dragging out the last word as she fiddled with the clock.
After that they prepared for bed mostly in silence, taking turns in the bathroom before crawling under the covers. Despite the summer heat, it was quite cool. Astrid wondered if it was because they were so high up, or if the temperature was controlled by magic.
Despite her heavy eyes, Astrid couldn't fall asleep, even though the curtains on her bed muffled Star's and Toph's snores. She had hoped she could sleep easier here. Back in her little room at Uncle Finn's she never slept well. Every time she'd open her eyes in the dark room, it was like that night over seven years ago, when Aunt Erika woke her to tell her Daddy and Celia were dead.
But this place was different. She shouldn't still be bothered by those childish memories! Still, her annoyance didn't help her fall asleep, and after an hour of staring at the red curtains she finally sat up and grabbed her suitcase, searching for some little notebooks.
Her sister's diaries. Celia started a new one every year, leaving the old ones at their house, where Astrid found them when they moved everything to Uncle Finn's house. As always when she opened them, Astrid wondered if her sister would have been okay with her reading them, but she could never resist. Apart from her letters this was all she had left of her. Maybe if she reread how her brave sister handled her first night at Hogwarts she could handle it as well.
So she found the diary from Celia's first year, and opened it to the first page.
September 1st
Dear Diary, I'm at Hogwarts! It's incredible here. It's so big! I got sorted into Gryffindor, Harry Potter's house! He wasn't at the table, though. Apparently he got really sick from the dementors on the train!
Oh right, I forgot to tell you, the train was stopped by dementors looking for Sirius Black! It was so scary, they made me feel all cold and empty. Jackie, who got sorted into Gryffindor with me, had to cry. Still, the feast made me feel much better, there was so much food!
I got to meet all my new housemates too! There's Jackie, and Chang, and some other girl whose name I forgot, and Dennis. Dennis' brother is also in Gryffindor. They're both Muggleborns. They're different than I expected. I always thought they'd be much dumber! But they were funny, and I can't wait for my classes tomorrow! I should go to sleep now, I think Jackie is getting annoyed at my writing at night.
The entry reminded Astrid that she had it easy compared to her sister. She didn't have to deal with Dementors! With that thought she finally fell asleep, still holding the diary.
Hey everyone! Those of you who follow me on Ao3 or FFN might have noticed this already, but last week I posted the first chapter of a new story of mine, called Grey Stains. It’s a HTTYD Hogwarts AU, taking place several years after the end of Harry Potter.
Summary: Post-Deathly Hallows Hogwarts AU. When Harry Potter escaped Gringotts on the back of a dragon and flew off towards the battle of Hogwarts, most of the wizarding world saw a hero. For a young Hiccup whose mother died in the Gringotts escape, it is much more complicated to grow up in a post-war world that still bears scars no one wants to talk about, especially when you’re bad at magic, your father is overprotective and paranoid of dragons, and there is a rising fear of neo-Death Eaters threatening the fragile peace. An original story (i.e. not Harry Potter retold) about trauma of all kinds, but also about overcoming your fears with the help of others. Eventual Hiccstrid.
I have been planning this story literally for years, so I’m very excited to finally share it with you all! I hope you like it! If you have any comments, thoughts, reviews, or questions, please let me know!
Enough talk, here’s the first chapter. I’ll be updating weekly, on Sundays. If you’d rather read on FFN or AO3 you can find it there as well, under the usernames wolfie-dragon and wolfie_dragon respectively.
—————————-
Hiccup broke out into coughs the moment he hit the ground. The world span around him, unfocused and blurred, as he tried not to suffocate.
“Oh, come on, son. Apparating is not that bad,” Stoick said, roughly pulling him up by his armpits from the dusty courtyard tiles.
“You-” Hiccup couldn’t finish his retort at first, too busy getting air back into his lungs. The dust, the tight suffocating space he had just been in, it brought back flashes. Screams. Crumbling masonry.
“Easy for you to say. You’re not… allergic to dust and tight spaces,” he eventually managed to spit out. Stoick scoffed for a second, but didn’t start a rant at least. Hiccup was grateful for that. Whenever he’d panic at a small room or dust cloud Stoick would normally complain that he should ‘man up’ already since he was not “actually allergic to dust”.
Maybe he was right, but that didn’t mean Hiccup didn’t get physically sick every time he had to face it.
“Look, you’re okay, so let’s get your stuff. You have your list, right?” Stoick asked, grabbing his wand and tapping several stones on the wall next to him. Hiccup reached into his pocket to grab the parchment he received last week.
Hey everyone! Those of you who follow me on Ao3 or FFN might have noticed this already, but last week I posted the first chapter of a new story of mine, called Grey Stains. It’s a HTTYD Hogwarts AU, taking place several years after the end of Harry Potter.
Summary: Post-Deathly Hallows Hogwarts AU. When Harry Potter escaped Gringotts on the back of a dragon and flew off towards the battle of Hogwarts, most of the wizarding world saw a hero. For a young Hiccup whose mother died in the Gringotts escape, it is much more complicated to grow up in a post-war world that still bears scars no one wants to talk about, especially when you're bad at magic, your father is overprotective and paranoid of dragons, and there is a rising fear of neo-Death Eaters threatening the fragile peace. An original story (i.e. not Harry Potter retold) about trauma of all kinds, but also about overcoming your fears with the help of others. Eventual Hiccstrid.
I have been planning this story literally for years, so I’m very excited to finally share it with you all! I hope you like it! If you have any comments, thoughts, reviews, or questions, please let me know!
Enough talk, here’s the first chapter. I’ll be updating weekly, on Sundays. If you’d rather read on FFN or AO3 you can find it there as well, under the usernames wolfie-dragon and wolfie_dragon respectively.
----------------------------
Hiccup broke out into coughs the moment he hit the ground. The world span around him, unfocused and blurred, as he tried not to suffocate.
"Oh, come on, son. Apparating is not that bad," Stoick said, roughly pulling him up by his armpits from the dusty courtyard tiles.
"You-" Hiccup couldn't finish his retort at first, too busy getting air back into his lungs. The dust, the tight suffocating space he had just been in, it brought back flashes. Screams. Crumbling masonry.
"Easy for you to say. You're not... allergic to dust and tight spaces," he eventually managed to spit out. Stoick scoffed for a second, but didn't start a rant at least. Hiccup was grateful for that. Whenever he'd panic at a small room or dust cloud Stoick would normally complain that he should 'man up' already since he was not "actually allergic to dust".
Maybe he was right, but that didn't mean Hiccup didn't get physically sick every time he had to face it.
"Look, you're okay, so let's get your stuff. You have your list, right?" Stoick asked, grabbing his wand and tapping several stones on the wall next to him. Hiccup reached into his pocket to grab the parchment he received last week.
His acceptance letter to Hogwarts.
"Great! Now, first of all we should go to Gringotts. All these books aren't cheap, and it's time you get your own account as well. That way you can collect interest on your allowance, and use it for Hogsmeade trips and things like that," his father said, as the wall opened up to reveal Diagon Alley. It was filled with people.
The last time Hiccup had been there it had been nearly deserted.
"I don't want to go to Gringotts. That's where-" he started, unable to finish the sentence when his throat closed up. Just like with the apparition he couldn't breathe at the memory.
Stoick sighed loudly, the disappointment clear, but then he knelt so he was closer to Hiccup's eye level.
"That was seven years ago. Nothing will happen now. It's all safe. You're growing up! You're going to Hogwarts, and take your place in our world. And for that, you need a Gringotts account. Plus, it'll look bad if the son of the Head of the Department of Magical Creatures didn't get an account at the bank run by our biggest allies!" he said.
At that moment Hiccup couldn't care less about relations with goblins, but he still nodded slowly.
"Okay. I'll try," he whispered.
"Attaboy! Now let's go, we don't have all day!" Stoick shouted, getting up and turning to Diagon Alley, his long cloak flapping with the motion. Hiccup almost had to run to keep up with his huge steps. People parted at the sight of the 7-feet tall man wearing gilded ministry robes, so they got through the crowd easily.
The goblin guards at the enormous bank doors recognized Stoick, so they greeted him warmly, and he returned the greeting before briskly walking inside. Hiccup followed, unsure if the goblins had even noticed him at half his father's height.
It took a moment for his eyes to adjust to the light inside, with the white marble and shining gold all over the place.
"Wait here for a second," Stoick told him before walking right past the queue of wizards and witches and talking to the goblin teller. The people waiting in line shot him dirty looks, but the ministry robes stopped them from protesting.
"But…" Hiccup whispered, not wanting to be alone. Not here. The tiles were too clean and white. They had been stained red with blood. A mother and her young son pushed past him to join the queue. The boy was licking ice cream. Hiccup got a whiff of the scent of vanilla cream, and all of a sudden he was outside in Diagon Alley again, but it was much emptier.
Abandoned shops and boarded-up windows lined the street, but 4-year old Hiccup didn't care, because Mama just bought him ice cream from the new parlour. As they waited in line Hiccup heard adults talking about the old ice cream vendor having vanished, but he hadn't understood it, and it hadn't mattered. He got his vanilla ice cream, and then they all walked to the bank together, him between his parents. They had explained that they just had to check on something there real quick, and then they'd go back home.
The building had been chaotic when they entered. Dozens of goblin guards ran around, and a barricade was being set up at the gate to the tunnels. Stoick was pulled away by an anxious-looking goblin with grey hair, leaving Hiccup alone with his mom.
"Mama, what's happening?" he asked between licks of his ice cream.
"Nothing, it's fine. There's just something your father and I have to… make sure doesn't get out of hand," she said, before ruffling his hair. The sudden move made him smear some ice cream on the collar of his shirt. "Oh, you're so clumsy. Let's clean that up."
She had just taken her wand out of her pocket when the world turned upside down.
A massive shockwave knocked them off their feet. Hiccup saw the wand fly out of her hand as they fell. A roar echoed through the room, answered by screams and shouts.
His head pounded where it hit the marble floor, and when he turned to look at the source of the noise it felt like he was dreaming.
Large parts of the floor were missing, and more tiles crumbled into the dark hole that had been white marble moments ago. A desk covered with documents and coins slid over the edge, despite a goblin trying to hold onto it. Hiccup couldn't look away from the screaming creature falling in and disappearing from sight. But then his mama grabbed him and pulled him back, and he looked up.
There was an enormous dragon towering over them. It was thin and white, and its huge eyes were milky. On its back were three people, but they were too far away for him to make out.
"Hiccup, get back," Mama shouted, pulling him behind an overturned desk. His hands were shaking, and he realized there was ice cream all over them. The dragon roared, the sound making Hiccup's ears hurt. It was followed with a cacophony of shouts and screams, and he covered his ears with his sticky hands.
A burst of flame shot over their heads, hitting a group of people near the door who screamed in agony.
"Stay here," his mom said, making him look away from the man whose robes were on fire. She stood up and slowly walked towards the dragon, hands in the air.
"Mama!" he shouted, the word lost in the noise as the dragon's tail smashed through a pillar. It shattered into a hundred pieces that rained down on the people around it.
"It's okay. Just calm down. You're a good dragon. It's alright. No one will hurt you." Somehow Hiccup could hear his mother's soft words among the chaos. The dragon turned to her, growling aggressively despite the people on its back pulling at its horns. A puff of smoke escaped its nostrils.
"Mama! Mama no!" Hiccup screamed, climbing on top of the desk as the dragon put its nose right next to his mother, who looked so tiny compared to the enormous creature. It sniffed and growled more. Mama's arm trembled as she slowly raised it.
One of the people on the dragon's back, a man with red hair, cast some kind of spell at the creature, making it groan. Its jaws opened, revealing rows of enormous fangs. Despite the black soot covering them they looked razor-sharp, and Hiccup had never felt so scared in his life.
BANG!
A flash of light and a loud bang shook the hall. The goblins cowered as the dragon roared in pain and fury.
"No, no, it's okay, just calm down, NOOOO!"
Hiccup was frozen as the dragon charged forward blindly. It felt like time slowed down as Mama put her hands in front of her face in a futile attempt to block.
Her scream ended with a horrific crushing sound as the dragon's front paw came down on her.
Suddenly there were more flashes of all colors, more shouts, more magic, but none of it existed. The dragon screamed, thrashing around wildly as spells hit it. More pillars crumbled and collapsed, and parts of the ceiling fell around him. None of it was real. None of this could be real.
"Mama! Mama! MAMA!" Hiccup screamed, frozen in place on top of the overturned desk.
"Hiccup, get away from there!" someone shouted, but he couldn't understand it. Why wasn't Mama getting up?
The dragon charged forward, straight into the wall of the building, opening it up to bright beams of sunlight that reflected on blue gems and white debris and pools of blood. With a final roar, it opened its wings and took flight with a single flap that drove a cloud of dust through the hall. It made Hiccup cough, and he didn't see the ceiling above him crack.
"Hiccup!" his father's voice shouted. It seemed so far away. The ceiling came down, on his Mama, on the goblins, on him. Brutal pain raced through his arm and back.
"Hiccup! Hiccup!" He blinked, and suddenly he was back in a clean and calm room. There was a ceiling and four walls and no screaming. His father was kneeling in front of him.
"Are you there? Come on, stop daydreaming. It's time to visit the vaults. I'm sure you'll like the cart ride!" he said, and Hiccup shook his head. His arm ached, despite the fracture having healed seven years ago. He didn't remember much of it. Being trapped under the stone, unable to breathe, for a minute until his father and other wizards could dig him out. A hospital bed. Left alone as his dad suddenly had to do a million things.
The next day the war was over. Ended by the three people he had seen riding the dragon.
"I… I'm fine," he whispered, trying to look strong in front of the old goblin standing next to Stoick.
"That's my boy! You see, Gringotts ain't so bad. You know what, if you're good during the cart ride, I'll get you an owl!"
Hiccup managed not to throw up during the cart ride. In fact it was quite exhilarating, like flying his broomstick back at the mansion. He rarely got the opportunity to do that, since his father was always nervous about dragons hiding in the clouds, waiting to strike.
The ride was over far too quickly, and then it was just a matter of moving coins around. Hiccup received a key to an empty vault, with promises it would fill up while he was at Hogwarts.
The ride back to the surface was even faster than the first cart, though Hiccup found it harder to enjoy, his stomach sinking when he caught a glimpse of the large doors leading back to the main hall. His dad seemed to sense his mood, and simply ushered them through the room quickly without stopping to speak to passersby like he normally did.
It wasn't until they stood outside in the bright midday sun that Hiccup felt like he could breathe again.
"Alright, let's get your school supplies first, it'll be much easier if we don't have to carry an owl around all day. What do you wanna get first? How about the books, you're always buried in those," Stoick asked. Hiccup resisted the urge to snark about how there was nothing else to do at the mansion but read, and instead focused on happier things.
"Can we get my wand?" he asked, already walking towards the shops and away from the bank.
A minute later they entered a tiny shop called Ollivander's, and the oldest man Hiccup had ever seen greeted them. He was almost completely bald, the few strands of hair that remained were wispy and white. His face and neck bore many scars, and his eyes felt like they looked straight into Hiccup's soul.
"Oh, Mr. Haddock! It feels like yesterday that I sold you your wand. 11 and a quarter inches, holly wood, with a dragon heartstring core, is that correct? I hope it's still working well for you," the man said with a croaky voice.
"Yes, it is," Stoick said, frowning at the mention of the dragon heartstring core. "But we're not here for me. My son is going to Hogwarts and he needs a wand."
Hiccup tried to smile, despite feeling very uncomfortable around the old man he assumed was Ollivander. The wand would be worth it. He'd be able to do magic!
"Ah, of course. Let's see… How about 9 and three quarter inches, yew, unicorn hair? Nice and straightforward," Ollivander said, opening a narrow box on the counter and handing it to Hiccup. "Go on, give it a swing!"
His hand trembled slightly when he took the wand. This would allow him to do magic! He'd only have to swing it! So he took a deep breath and gently swung the wand.
Nothing happened.
Ollivander ignored his surprise at the lack of sparks, snatching the wand from his hand and giving him another. "Pear, 10 and a half inches, dragon heartstring!"
"Wait a minute, you still use dragon heartstring? I banned all dragon products years ago," Stoick said as Hiccup swung a few times, still with no result.
"Eh, that just banned me from buying more. I have a huge stock of heartstring, Mr. Haddock. And there's absolutely nothing evil about it, no matter what you might believe. Now, try this one: Blackthorn, 12 inches, unicorn hair," the old man said, giving Hiccup another wand and grabbing more boxes from a shelf.
Stoick scoffed at that, but didn't push further. Instead he sat down in the small chair in the corner. The wood creaked under his weight. Hiccup tried to cast a hovering spell with the long wand, copying the movement he saw Mrs. Beakley, their housekeeper, use whenever she used Wingardium Leviosa.
Absolutely nothing happened. Of course he hadn't said the words, but still, it felt like he was failing at this.
"There's nothing to worry about. This happens to a lot of people. Your mother tried 23 wands before one chose her. Your father needed a dozen tries too," Ollivander said, piling up boxes on the counter and handing another one over. "Rosewood, 11 inches, phoenix feather, great for charms."
"Shouldn't something be coming out anyway? I remember producing fire and smoke with all the wands I tried," Stoick said, shifting in the chair.
"Indeed, wizards can produce intuitive magic even with wands that haven't chosen them, but it's much harder. There's degrees in this, some wands make it harder, some easier. In fact, let's try… Larch, 10 and a quarter inch, unicorn hair," Ollivander said as another wand was pushed into Hiccup's hands.
Another swing, and still nothing.
"Oh, that's a little strange. Still, I'm sure there's a wand for you. I do love a difficult customer!" Ollivander exclaimed, flicking his own wand to make entire stacks of boxes float towards the counter.
Hiccup had tried 51 wands with no result when his father stood up, the chair squeaking loudly in relief.
"Well, this looks like it's going to… take a while. How about I buy the rest of your supplies while you keep trying," he said, wrapping his cloak tighter around himself. Hiccup sighed, giving him the list.
Ollivander wasn't deterred by the ever growing pile of tried wands, marking their boxes with a small H and putting them back on the shelves while grabbing new ones. Meanwhile Hiccup swung and swung and swung some more.
A while later, long after Hiccup lost count, the door opened again. A blonde girl ran in, followed by a blond man with a long beard and auror robes.
"Astrid, no need to run. We have plenty of time," the man said as the girl ran right next to Hiccup, stopping him mid-swing. She was pretty, despite her scowl and narrowed eyes.
"Ah, Mr. Finn Hofferson! Is that blackthorn wand still working for you? And who is this? I didn't know you had children," Ollivander said, dumping another armful of wands on Hiccup's end of the counter. Hiccup took one, swung it, and slid it to the other end when it didn't work. As he pushed it, he noticed the girl looking at him and the pile of wands strangely.
"This is Astrid, my niece on my brother's side. I took her in after…" the auror said, putting his hand on Astrid's shoulder when her head dropped.
"Ah, of course. It's very nice to meet you, young witch. I sold your brother and sister their wands, you know. Though that was over a decade ago. They must have left Hogwarts around the… oh, right," Ollivander said, Astrid immediately snapping her head up to look at him with piercing eyes.
"Can we just get her wand? She's feisty, maybe a blackthorn one like mine?" Finn said, obviously eager to change the subject that Hiccup didn't really understand.
"Of course, of course. How about you try this one. Just swing it, like Hiccup over here does," Ollivander said. Hiccup, startled by her bright blue eyes, dropped the wand he was swinging, making it clatter loudly.
"Try not to drop it, though. Blackthorn, 11 inches, dragon heartstring," Ollivander said, grabbing a wand from the used pile and handing it to the girl. Frowning, she swung it once, and immediately sparks exploded from the tip. Her frown turned into a smile instantly.
"Not quite right. How about holly, 12 and a quarter inch, phoenix feather," Ollivander said as Hiccup swung another wand, trying not to look too disappointed when nothing happened.
Astrid swung the wand, and a moment later a vase exploded.
"Ooh, a little too temperamental. Ah, I know. Red oak, dragon heartstring, 9 and a half inches. A perfect wand for dueling and combat!" The wandmaker dug in the pile, finding a thin reddish wand and handing it over.
The moment Astrid touched it, her jaw dropped. With a firm hand, she swung it, and a soft glow emitted from the wand. She smiled brightly, and Hiccup couldn't help but smile as well.
"Perfect, perfect! It has chosen you! Congratulations, Ms. Hofferson. I'm sure you'll overcome great foes with this wand. Perhaps your biggest challenge will be deciding who those foes shall be," Ollivander told a brightly smiling Astrid. But then she glanced at Hiccup swinging another unresponsive wand and her smile dropped a bit. He couldn't help but wonder if she considered him a potential foe.
After another round of congratulations from Finn, payment was exchanged and the Hoffersons left the store, leaving behind an empty silence with no crackling sparks or exploding chinaware.
"Is that what's supposed to happen? What happens to everybody else?" he eventually asked, tossing another wand on the counter a little harder than he needed to.
Ollivander sighed deeply.
"Usually, yes. Untrained witches and wizards tend to send uncontrolled magic through every object they touch, and wands react to that magic, even if they didn't choose the wizard. It's almost like you're already trained. Did your father get you private tutoring?" the old man asked, sorting out the wands Astrid had tried and marking more boxes with an H.
"Yes, but not for this. I haven't learned any magic or spells. They just teach me history or Latin," Hiccup said, swinging again. He could feel something whenever he swung, a brief spark of burning heat in his fingertips like he grasped a candle flame. But it wasn't a good feeling like he always imagined magic would feel.
"Strange. But that just makes it more interesting! Come on, keep trying!" Ollivander said, and Hiccup did. His arm ached from the motion by the time his father returned with a bag full of books and potion supplies.
"You're still going?! Come on, Hiccup! I have more things to do today, you know," Stoick said, putting the bag down and gesturing at the piles of wands.
"I can't help it. They won't work!" Hiccup said, grabbing another one, swinging it with no effect, and tossing it on the used pile.
"You just have to do some magic! I know you can do it, you're not a damn squib!" his father shouted, sitting down heavily in the chair. Hiccup saw a crack run down one of its legs.
"I'm trying! Do you think I don't want this to work?" he said, grabbing a random wand from the pile.
"Well, try harder! You've been in here for hours! People are gonna notice," Stoick said, glancing out the window, and all the frustration Hiccup had been building up exploded.
"Is that all you care about? That random people will notice I'm having trouble finding a wand!" he screamed, raising the wand to point at his father.
Heat raced down his arms, burning his veins. The wand trembled in his shaking hand, and then the heat focused in his fingertips. It became too much, the fire scorching him from within.
But then suddenly the heat disappeared, replaced with a red flame bursting from the wand's tip. Hiccup yelped, dropping it from his tingling fingers. As quick as it had appeared, the fire vanished.
The only sound in the room was the wand clattering on the floorboards.
"See, you can do magic! That wand worked, right? Mr. Ollivander! What do you think?" Stoick said, smiling brightly despite soot darkening his beard.
"Accidental magic, yes, but still magic. No doubt. So there must be a wand for you. That one wasn't it, though. Let's keep going. There's still plenty of wands left," the old man slowly said.
No one seemed to care about Hiccup's pained sigh as he picked up another wand and gave it a swing. It did nothing. Just the same flash of painful heat in his fingertips as before. Nothing like the burst of actual magic he had just felt.
An hour later, after a boy by the name of Hiro came in and got his wand on the first try, Stoick stood up and grabbed the bag of supplies.
"That's enough. This is going nowhere. Clearly there's something very wrong with these wands. We'll go see better wandmakers tomorrow. I hear there's a good one in New York. One who doesn't use dragon products either," he said, putting his hand on Hiccup's shoulder and pulling him away from the counter.
"Very well. Every wandmaker will tell you there's nothing wrong with dragon heartstring cores, but clearly you've made up your mind based on a completely unrelated event, Department Head Haddock," Ollivander said in an icy tone. Stoick huffed, but didn't respond. He just stomped out the shop dragging Hiccup along with him.
He gave Mr. Ollivander an apologetic smile as his father slammed the door shut.
"That impudent- No matter. There's plenty of other wandmakers," Stoick said, moving towards the Leaky Cauldron.
"But Dad… You said I was gonna get an owl," Hiccup asked, not as excited as he had been before they went into the wand shop.
"Ugh… Fine. We'll get that owl, then we go home," Stoick said, turning around with heavy footsteps. The street was much emptier now that the sun was setting.
The cacophony of roars and meows and squawks in the pet store was the complete opposite of the silence of Ollivander's. And yet Hiccup felt much more at ease around the animals. There were no other customers inside.
"Hey, you! I'm looking for an owl for my son," Stoick shouted at a young woman standing behind the counter. Hiccup walked to a wall filled with bird cages. The owls were fairly quiet compared to the other creatures. He reached out his finger to a yellow-blueish owl with bright blue eyes.
Hiccup gently scratched the bird, and it opened its beak wide. A puff of smoke came out.
"Of course! What kind of personality would you like? We have several: playful, obedient, intel-"
The clerk's words were cut off by Hiccup's scream when the bird breathed fire. It was just a tiny flame, hardly bigger than a torch, but it conjured images of crumbling masonry and blood. The scream emptied his lungs, and he couldn't breathe to fill them again. He stumbled and fell, coughing at the musky air.
"What in Merlin's name is that! I demand answers!" Stoick shouted as he drew his wand, pointing it at the bird.
"It's a magical fusion! An owl with the magical abilities of a Blast-ended Skrewt! We got it from a wizard who experiments with transferring abilities between creatures!" she said quickly, running over and petting the fire-breathing bird.
"How do I know it's not some dragon monstrosity? Do you know who I am? I am Stoick Haddock, head of the Department of Magical Creatures. I introduced the laws against draconic experimentation, and if I suspect any violation of that law I could shut this place down right now!"
Hiccup finally managed to catch his breath, raising his head to see all the blood drain from the clerk's face.
"No, I swear it's nothing draconic! Please, sir! Have a free owl, any one you want!" she said, hands trembling.
"I don't trust anything you sell!" Stoick said, tone icy as he kept his wand raised. The woman's eyes flickered between the wand and the ministry badge on his robes.
"Then let me compensate you. For the… emotional damages!," she shouted, before running to the till. "Here, this is more than enough to buy an owl at any other pet store!" she said, holding up several gold coins. Stoick was silent for a few seconds, until he slowly lowered his wand.
"Fine, I'll take that. And you better hope I never hear of any kind of creature experimentation again."
It wasn't until they were standing outside again that Hiccup had calmed down enough to speak.
"I wanted an owl. Not that one, but a normal one," he said, glaring at his fuming father.
"Maybe we'll get one in New York tomorrow. At least in America they protect well against these… abominations. I'm trying to get those laws here as well, but no one wants to cooperate!" Stoick said as they made it back to the courtyard of the Leaky Cauldron.
"Now grab on. We're going home," he said, gesturing at his arm. Hiccup shook his head violently.
"No, I can't do apparition again! Please, Dad!" he begged, breath speeding up at the very thought of that narrow tube. The anger he had felt over the owl vanished, frozen by the memory.
"Come on, Hiccup! It's better than floo powder. You can't handle that at all! Just swallow your fears already so we can go home," Stoick said, shaking his head in disappointment. Hiccup just jumped back.
"I can't!" he shouted, tears pricking at his eyes.
Stoick was quiet for a long time, staring at him with furrowed brow, until his face softened.
"Fine. We'll take the Knight's Bus, even if it is dreadfully uncomfortable. And we can take a portkey to New York tomorrow, you're okay with those, right?" he said, leading them through the Leaky Cauldron to the muggle street outside. An old witch tried to talk to Stoick, but he waved her away. The other people in the bar just looked at him darkly.
"Yeah, I guess. Thanks, Dad," Hiccup whispered, thinking back to the girl at Ollivander's and wondering if she was scared of anything.
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Hi! I just finished reading everything you've published for your Blind-Hiccup AU, and I wanted to say that I truly enjoyed reading all of it, and it's evident how much time and effort you've put into that world. Thank you so much for sharing it!
Thank you so much! I’m very happy you enjoyed it all!
Bursts of Light, Day 27: On one of their Birthdays
A/N: Hello everyone, I'm back with another chapter. Only 3 more to go! I hope you like it!
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Astrid woke very slowly, a sunbeam from the skylight making her blink. It must be nearly midday then.
When Hiccup had suggested retirement from being chief, she had been against it. They had done it for nearly four decades, surely they were the most capable people on Berk to keep leading the town. But eventually, he had convinced her that Thora was more than ready to take over. She had been doing more and more chiefly duties already over the past few years, so in some ways her becoming full chief was just a formality.
Some days she still missed leading. It was exhilarating, having people listen to her commands and seeing them prosper under her leadership.
But on days like this, when she could just sleep for as long as she wanted with no boring ceremonies or meetings to attend, she was grateful Hiccup had retired. They had given it their all for so long, they deserved to relax in their old age.
"Morning, sleepyhead," Hiccup said as she groaned and stretched, making her squint against the bright light to see him already up and dressed. Next to him, on the wall of their bedroom, was an old painting of them right after they were married.
Although his hair had turned grey and he had to lean heavily on his walking stick, he still looked as handsome to her as he did forty years ago.
"You're up early. Normally you sleep well past noon," she said, getting up and smoothing out her nightshirt.
"Well, it's a special occasion. I had to make sure everything is ready!" he chuckled, walking over and kissing her with no hesitation, despite her morning breath.
"Wait, what occasion?" she asked, grabbing some clothes and a bar of soap for her morning bath.
"You forgot? It's your birthday! Happy sixtieth birthday, my love!" Hiccup said, squeezing her arm and nearly making her drop her clothes. Freya, sixty already?
"Oh. Oh, right. I, uhm… I forgot, yeah. Let me just take a quick bath first, okay? I'm all sweaty after last night," Astrid said, making him chuckle when he remembered their intense lovemaking. Despite his weaker leg, he was still as passionate as he had been when they were teenagers.
"Sure, take your time," Hiccup said as she walked past him and through the back door to the hot spring. With a happy sigh she dipped into the pool, allowing herself to relax for a minute before grabbing the soap.
Astrid had never really cared that much about her age. Numbers were more Hiccup's thing anyway, and the years blurred together after so long. And yet, sixty felt like a new milestone. She was Old now.
Of course, she had been Old for quite a while now, she thought as she washed hair that had turned white a decade ago. She had been a grandmother for decades now, and her oldest grandchild, Starla, might be having children of her own soon. Astrid wasn't sure whether she was in a relationship. After Lucy and Clay divorced amicably when little Starla was 15, Starla moved back to Meathead island with her mother, and news traveled slowly from there.
And even if they could communicate instantly, Astrid doubted an 18-year old would want to gush over her latest crush with her old granny.
Gods, she was old. That meant Hiccup was Old as well. He was a year older than her, and yet she couldn't really think of him as Old. Her mother was someone who was undoubtedly Old at 76, although she was still sharp of mind and traveled all over the archipelago.
Astrid felt dread as she dried off and put on clean clothes. Growing old meant death, and she hadn't really considered that before. That she and Hiccup could be nearing the end of their lives.
No, this was too morbid to think about. Hiccup had prepared all kinds of nice things for her birthday, and she was not going to ruin it. She and everyone she loved were perfectly healthy.
So she straightened her back and forced herself to take strong strides as she walked back inside, where a nice smell greeted her.
"What smells so good? Did you manage to bake a cake by your-"
"SURPRISE!" a chorus of voices shouted, nearly making her fall over. When she recovered she realized the living room was full of family and friends: The other riders, her children, her mother, Thora's kids, and of course Hiccup in the center, holding a huge cake she suspected he didn't actually bake.
"Oh gods, that's a surprise alright. I hope I didn't keep you waiting," Astrid managed to say before the wave of individual greetings, congratulations, and other conversations started.
After spending a bit of time playing with her youngest grandchild, 11-year old Kenneth, she finally managed to get a slice of cake and sit down.
"Are you okay? Sorry if it was too much. Thora insisted on organizing it, and you know how… enthusiastic she can get," Hiccup whispered as he sat down next to her. She smiled as she looked at Claybones talking to Kirsten about new stories coming from the far south about brave knights and how they differed from their Nordic ballads.
"It's alright. I would have liked something a little… quieter, but we'll have plenty of time for that tomorrow, I guess. Or even later today," she said, grabbing Hiccup's hand. Even after 45 years of doing that it still made her feel loved and connected to him.
The party lasted for a few hours longer, until the grandchildren grew bored and Hiccup clearly became tired. Kirsten was the first to notice his loss of concentration and began dropping hints for the guests to leave.
"Up too early preparing all this?" Astrid chuckled as the last guests left, and mentally prepared herself for the cleanup. So many mugs and plates to wash. But perhaps it could wait until tomorrow.
"No, it's fine-" Hiccup might have been more convincing if he hadn't had to yawn in the middle of his sentence, and he clearly realized it himself. "Let's just… prepare to rest. We'll go on a flight tomorrow, okay?"
"Alright, there's plenty of time. We deserve a break," she chuckled as Hiccup stood up and walked into his workshop.
"I didn't get the chance to give you this earlier, but… Happy birthday, Astrid," he said, grabbing something and presenting it to her.
It was a battleaxe, but not just any axe. The two steel blades were inlaid with detailed engravings, and the handle contained carved wood. Speechless, Astrid took the weapon and looked at them in more detail.
"It's all your victories over the years. Look, over here is when we captured Alvin. Honestly, I'm not sure if it's very accurate, I couldn't see what was going on, so I went on imagination. Here's Drago, laid low by your arrows and axe. And here, on the other side, your great charge in the Berserker War," he explained, making her chuckle.
"And what's this last one?" she asked, running her fingers over an engraving of… her in bed?
"That's… that's you giving birth. Your most painful battles where you fought the hardest. Even… Even the one you lost. I hope it's not too painful to remember, even over 30 years later," he slowly said, and Astrid's eyes became wet at the memory of that horrible stillbirth.
"It's… It's amazing, Hiccup. I'm glad you made this. Even this last engraving. I could never forget it anyway, but this way… it's easier," she whispered, now recognizing the little bundle the engraved woman was holding as a tiny baby.
"I'm still proud of you, you know? You fought so hard, you still fight so hard for us, for our family, even if we… can't win them all. I love you so much," he said, putting his arms around her. A tear rolled off her cheek and broke on the axe's blade.
"I love you too. There's no one I'd rather have spent all these decades with, no one I could have gone through all this with," she said, feeling more tears fall as she laid the axe in her lap and hugged Hiccup back.
"Happy birthday, Astrid. I hope we'll have many more together."
A/N: Hello readers! I'm back with another drabble, Getting Married. Since Hiccstrid's wedding day was covered extensively in Blind Spots, I decided to add a little spin to it. I hope you like it!
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"Dad? Can I… Can I talk to you?"
Hiccup raised his head despite the fact that he didn't need to 'look' at his son. This was unusual. Clay had a quiet and reserved personality, sure, but it had been years since he had been this nervous about anything. The boy had a combative streak to counter any thoughts others might have about calling him weak.
So sensing his son so agitated, even across the room, made Hiccup frown.
"Of course. You can talk to me about anything, you know that."
Claybones' wheelchair squeaked softly as he pushed himself into the room, placing himself on the other side of the dining table Hiccup had been working at. The wheelchair was something Hiccup had worked on for dozens of hours back when Clay was 13 and it was becoming clear he wouldn't be able to walk all the time anymore.
When he first saw it the boy had been furious, screaming at him and Astrid, accusing them of not loving him, that they just wanted him gone. He'd screamed they were just putting him in a position where he wouldn't be able to do anything. It had been hard, but a few days later Clay came out of his room and apologized in the same hesitant tone he had now.
"There's… You remember how we went to Meathead Island two months ago? Me and Thora and Grandma Kirsten? When I was there I met this girl, and… I really really like her," Claybones slowly said, voice soft.
"And… you want to court her?" Hiccup was unsure why Clay was asking about this. As far as Hiccup knew he didn't have any experience being in a relationship himself, but the boy was a brilliant observer, learning all about other relationships and their secrets, what made them work and what broke them apart. So he just started saying whatever came to mind to reassure Clay he too could find love.
"Look, Son, it's great that you met someone you like, but remember you shouldn't try to go too fast. What does she even think of you? Hell, I thought I was in love with your mother for years while she barely knew who I was. It was only later, after I met Toothless, and… the accident happened, that we really got to know each other and truly fell in love. So maybe try talking to her first, figure out if she likes you back-"
"She's pregnant."
Hiccup stopped breathing for a second, unsure of what his son was even saying. He was in love with a girl who was already with child and would surely marry the father?
"Son… I know it must be super painful, but it's not good to chase after a woman who is already with someone else. It's unlikely she'd leave the other man for some stranger-"
"What are you talking about?!" Claybones shouted.
"What are you talking…" Hiccup started when it suddenly clicked. "Are you the father?" he asked, confusing clear in his voice.
"Yes, dammit! You don't have to sound so… surprised about the very possibility! I-I-I still have the… the equipment, the capability of being with a woman, you know! Girls can still be attracted to me even though I'm in this fucking chair!" Claybones screamed, slamming his hands down on the arms of the wheelchair. Hiccup was sure he had been close to breaking bones with that move. Hiccup could sense his boy was about to jump up, try to walk, before calming himself.
"Sorry. This isn't easy, okay, and your tone is not helping. You're the one who always said I shouldn't feel limited just because I'm in a wheelchair," he continued, voice softer now.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it that way. Of course you're not… repulsive or incapable of being with someone! I just… This is big news. You understand that, right? I just wanted to make sure I understood correctly," Hiccup said, still trying to process this news. Oh gods, this was bad. Clay was only 17, and who knew how old this girl was? Thor Almighty, how was he going to tell Astrid that their son would have a child? Wait, this means he is going to be a grandfather! He didn't expect that to happen for a long time yet.
"Yes, she's pregnant with my child. She sent me a terror mail two days ago to tell me." Clay's voice was calm, almost detached. A sharp contrast to his outburst just moments ago.
"And she's sure it's yours? How did you even…" Hiccup started, unable to process.
"Yes, it's mine. There's no other guy or anything! We love each other!" Clay said, fire coming back to his voice.
"Are you sure you do? Because you were on Meathead Island for what? Four days? How long did you even know each other before you jumped into bed together?!" Hiccup said, rubbing his face in a hopeless attempt to stop his budding headache.
"We just clicked! I met her on our first evening there, at the welcoming feast. We talked for hours, and then… things just happened. And then we spent the entire four days and nights together," Clay said. Hiccup didn't know what to say. He just sighed and shook his head.
"Come on, Dad, don't give me the silent treatment. That's what Mom does. This is… This is why I went to you, not her! Because… Because you don't get mad. So please don't be mad," his son said desperately, and Hiccup could hear the fear in the words.
Behind his combative facade, Clay was terrified.
"I'm not mad. Not… Not really. I'm just… deeply disappointed in you. You're smart. Like, genuinely genius-smart. And you know all about relationships and secrets and what people do and feel. I know Kirsten explained everything about intimacy as well. So… you should have known better. Look, I get how exciting it can be to find that connection, but I expected you to be more responsible than this. This will impact your entire life. And hers, too! And the rest of us too. How do you think it reflects on Thora if her brother has a bastard child? Not to mention the child itself! Caring for a baby isn't easy. That's a lifetime commitment," Hiccup slowly said.
"You and Mom were my age when you got married!" Clay said heatedly. For a second Hiccup thought he heard a sniff in there.
"And we had been together for three years. And apart from that… Your mother and I went through hell together, okay. We had seen the absolute best and the absolute worst of each other before we got married or even had physical intimacy. And we still had troubles and fights and hard times. It took two years of trying before we made Thora. And even then we weren't really ready to raise a child. Maybe no one ever is. So forgive me for being a little skeptical about your declaration of love for someone you've known for less than a week," Hiccup said clearly. The words came out harsher than he intended, but Clay didn't respond with anger like he expected.
A loud sniff suddenly broke the tense silence, and it became clear Claybones was crying. Hiccup slowly stood up and walked around the table. When he was next to the wheelchair he kneeled in front of his son, before reaching out his arms. It took a few seconds, but then the boy produced a loud sob while flinging himself into his father's arms.
"I know I messed up. I-I-I know I always complain about what stupid shit other people do in their relationships, and now I went and made the exact same mistakes. I just… I didn't see it coming. She was there and she… she listened to me. She is so beautiful and smart and she understood me, the real me. The other teens here on Berk, they never bother taking me seriously, but she… She didn't care that I can't walk, that I can barely move. She likes my art, and my ideas, and she makes me laugh too. She writes stories. Poetry. Beautiful poetry. She wrote a poem right there about how grumpy I was. And… And I just never felt so close to another person before," Claybones managed to say between sobs, his tears wetting Hiccup's shirt.
"What is her name?" he simply asked, knowing his son needed to let all of this out.
"Lucy. Her name is Lucy Henriksdotter. Her father is a wool merchant. He's quite wealthy. People won't be able to say I'm gonna marry below my station," Clay whispered, shaking in Hiccup's arms.
"So that's what you want to do? Marry her? Is that we she wants as well? Did she say in that letter?" he asked, holding his son a little tighter while being careful not to break any bones.
"She does. She said… We have to do it quickly. Her father will denounce her otherwise. If we marry this month we can still pretend…" the boy's voice trailed off. Hiccup sighed.
"You know people will know, right? They won't say it out loud, but they'll whisper it. They'll know what you and Lucy did, especially when that baby arrives just six months after the wedding," Hiccup said. His son's blonde hair tickled his neck when he nodded.
"Of course I know that. I get how rumors spread, probably better than anyone else on this island," he said heatedly.
"There's a difference between knowing it and experiencing it. Look son, I know you haven't had it easy, with your wheelchair and all, but this won't just be about you. People will whisper about her as well. Will you be prepared to defend your wife? Your bastard child?" Hiccup hated causing the shiver that ran through his son, but he knew the boy needed to understand this as soon as possible.
"I… I'll do my best. I love her. I do," Clay said, another sniff escaping.
"I hope you do, son. I really hope you do," Hiccup whispered, wondering how he was going to tell Astrid.
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As she looked at the dark clouds overhead, Astrid remembered her own wedding day. It had been storming then as well.
Hopefully the marriage would be brighter.
"Are you ready? It's almost time," Hiccup asked their son, who looked like he was about to throw up.
"I… I think so. I don't like being the center of attention like this," he mumbled, looking at his feet.
"Well, you got lucky there because we had to organize this so quickly. Not many people could show up. Camicazi couldn't make it, for example. Thora is not happy about that," Astrid said, taking one last look at the fast-moving clouds before turning to her child.
"Thora isn't happy about any of this. She hasn't talked to me at all since… Since she heard," Clay said, fidgeting with his fancy shirt. He was wobbly on his feet.
"She'll come around. I think she is just annoyed by your hypocrisy. You did constantly analyze and belittle all her suitors, and then this happens. But I'm sure that in less than a month she'll miss her little brother and your exploration trips, and apologize," Hiccup said.
Clay's dragon, Thinker, gently steadied his human as he found his balance. It had been years since the boy had been on his feet this long. But he had insisted on walking by himself during the ceremony.
"I know. I told her I'm sorry! I just… I hope she and Lucy can get along," he said, sneaking a glance at the other side of the square, where his bride was waiting with her father.
Her very, very, very angry father who only agreed to the marriage after the hefty bride price they offered. Before that he had been ready to denounce his daughter and deny her her inheritance for getting pregnant out of wedlock.
Hiccup would have taken her in, had her marry Clay and made her part of the Haddock family anyway if that had happened, but at least this way the girl would still have contact with her siblings and get her mother's tools and clothes.
"I'm sure they will. Now then, it's time. You have the ring and your sword?" Hiccup asked anxiously. Clay tapped his fingers over the sword on his belt audibly, and his father nodded.
"Well then, no time like the present. You don't want to be caught out in the rain. That happened to us on our wedding day, and it was not pleasant. Your father even broke his prosthetic while taking a mud bath!" Astrid said, brushing Clay's long hair behind his ears, and her eyes teared up a bit.
Her son, so young and so grown up at the same time. Did he really have to get married already?
It was strange. A month ago she hadn't even considered her youngest child being in a relationship, let alone fathering a child. Thora had always been the more obvious candidate, with her outgoing nature and many suitors hoping to wed the future chief of Berk. Clay had always stayed in the shadows, content with observing and capturing other people in his paintings.
She didn't think he'd even had friends before he met Lucy. He had always been so… different from all the other kids, both his brains and his bones. And now he was going to be a father.
"Don't remind me of our wedding day. It was… not as I had hoped it would be," Hiccup said, following Clay as the boy walked on unsteady legs. Thinker was right next to him, providing his human with something to lean on when he stumbled.
Astrid moved to the rows of chairs and sat down next to her daughter, who was sitting next to Kirsten. Kirsten looked like she was about to cry, while Thora refused to look at the proceedings, instead staring at her hands in her lap.
"Oh, I remember when you and he were just babies. You grow up too quickly for an old woman like me!" Kirsten said between sniffs, leaning towards Thora. The girl just ducked her head further.
"Doesn't seem like he grew up much if he let this happen," she muttered, making Astrid sigh.
"You know he's sorry, and that he will do everything he can to make it right. So just… try to support him? He needs his big sister, no matter how much he pretends not to. He has always helped you when you messed up," she said, patting her daughter's shoulder. Thora slowly nodded.
"I'll try," she whispered as Clay started saying his vows. Astrid couldn't help but frown. He was clearly nervous, and the bride's father looked at him with barely hidden disgust. Would this marriage fall apart within a year? Had she and Hiccup gone wrong with how they raised their son?
But then her eyes drifted to Hiccup standing nearby. He looked so proud of his son, so sure that this would all work out. And she felt a smile appear on her own face as well. Of course it would be fine. The young couple would have all the support they could ever need, from her entire family.
So even though Astrid wasn't really sure if she was ready to be grandmother yet, it took just one look at Hiccup to know she wouldn't face it alone, just like Clay wouldn't be facing this new stage of life alone.
Bursts of Light, Day 25: Gazing Into Each Other’s Eyes
A/N: Sorry it's been a while since the last update! Just days left. I can't believe it's almost over! Still, reviews are always appreciated, and they really help! Thanks for reading!
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Hiccup and Astrid are about 36 in this one. Thora and Claybones are 16 and 14 respectively.
"You know, Hiccup. I think Thora might have an eye on that DunBroch boy," Astrid told her husband. He dropped his fork, and it loudly clattered on his plate, making some of the council look up from their food and at them.
"Wh-what makes you think that?" he asked, awkwardly feeling for his fork. Unfortunately, the handle had fallen into the gravy, making him grimace when he felt the goop on his fingers.
"Oh, just that she has barely stopped looking at him. And she's laughing at every joke he makes," Astrid said, looking away from her husband licking the gravy from his fingers to look at the other high table, where their children sat with the emissaries from Scotland. Thora was positively glowing, eyes wide as she looked at the red-headed boy. Every time he turned in her direction she looked away, though Astrid could tell from the little smile on his lips that he wasn't completely blind.
She almost chuckled at the thought that unlike her husband, this cheeky boy wasn't oblivious to flirting.
"Oh. I see. I, uhm… I guess they'd be a good match. He's the brother of the queen of DunBroch, so that would come with a powerful alliance. And he's… not the oldest brother, I think? They're triplets, right? That complicates things. Well, either way, I'm sure that if something were to happen to Queen Merida one of his brothers would step forward to take the throne. So he could live here when Thora becomes chief without having to worry about ruling Scotland," Hiccup slowly said. Astrid knew that tone. It was his analytical mind taking over, repressing his emotions. He might be correct, but this wasn't everything he felt.
"Surely there's more to it than politics, Hiccup. Come on, tell me what you're really thinking," she said, putting her hand on his. It made him smile.
"I… I hadn't realized that she was already at that age. I'm not gonna be like… Snotlout and not realize that my daughter is gonna grow up and make choices for herself. She should, I won't stand in her way, I don't want to be overprotective. I just… forgot she's already 16," he whispered, turning away a little and playing with his fork.
"It all went so fast, didn't it," she said, before turning back to her food. She sensed Hiccup didn't want to talk about it in public, so she gave him some space. Every other bite she glanced at the other table, where the lovebirds were now talking. Astrid couldn't help but notice her daughter had barely touched her food, a sure sign she was excited and full of energy.
Thankfully Kirsten had talked to both Thora and her brother extensively about intimacy, so Astrid didn't expect any rash decisions or irreversible mistakes to happen quickly, but it was interesting to see the two teenagers bond so much just through looks.
Some part of her felt jealous. Although she and Hiccup were as close as they could be, being able to look into each other's eyes was something they had never been able to do, and would never be able to do in the future, barring an absolute miracle.
But she suppressed that jealousy. There was no point in dwelling on things that couldn't be.
Hiccup was distant throughout the rest of the banquet, and she could tell his mind was also dwelling on young love.
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Hiccup was tired when he walked through the door of their little house. Despite being the chief for over a decade now he hadn't moved into his father's house. It hadn't been designed with his disabilities in mind, so at the end of a long day like this, when his leg ached and his face itched, he was glad he didn't have to climb long stairs or stumble around bulky furniture.
Today the pain was deeper than his leg or face, however. Gods, he couldn't stop thinking about what Astrid had said about their daughter. He hadn't even been able to focus on the trade agreement with DunBroch, instead delaying the talks until tomorrow. Hopefully, a good night's sleep would clear his mind.
It wasn't even that he hated the thought of his little girl growing up. Of course, some part of him would always think of her as his little girl, but he knew and accepted she'd fall in love and marry and probably have babies herself.
What bothered him was that he hadn't been able to see any of it. Hiccup remembered a day almost 15 years ago when Thora was learning to walk. It was agony, knowing she was right there, inches away from his outstretched fingers, and he couldn't reach out to her. She had to make the move, she had to walk towards him on her own.
It was only through Astrid's gasps and words of encouragement that he could even know his baby was taking her first steps. Hiccup had briefly wondered if this was the gods toying with him again, giving him this wonderful child and yet making sure he couldn't see any of her achievements.
"Alright, I know that face. Something's bothering you. Out with it," Astrid said as he sat down with a heavy sigh. She walked around, lighting the fireplace and grabbing a mug to make tea.
"Just… thinking about how quickly our children grew up. I feel like I just… I missed everything. I couldn't see any of what they're doing, what they're making, building, accomplishing," he whispered, reaching his hand out to the papers pinned on the wall next to him. Drawings made by Thora and Claybones when they were younger. Thora had stopped drawing a while ago, but Claybones had found a purpose in art, drawing and painting for hours at a time. Opposite his chair, on the wall above the fireplace, hung one of his latest paintings. Berk from the sky, apparently. It could be blank and Hiccup wouldn't know.
"Oh, babe. You know you still did amazing. And they talk to you! That's more than Snotlout is managing with his kid apparently," Astrid said, putting the kettle on for tea.
"I don't know, it doesn't feel like that. It feels like Clay just hangs out with Kirsten all day, not with me. He really lost interest in inventing and engineering lately. And Thora… She talks more easily with you and with my mom. I can't relate to her athletic stuff," he slowly said, frowning as Astrid sat down next to him. She took his hand and squeezed it gently.
"Sure, they might not be able to talk to you about their hobbies, but when it matters, when it's important things they're struggling with, you know who they go to? Not their grandmothers, not their friends. It's you, their father. Do you know how rare that is for teenagers? Maybe you not being able to see them makes it easier for them to open up, show you their secrets," Astrid whispered, before kissing his cheek.
"I guess you're right. I just… I wish I could see Clay's paintings. I wish I could watch Thora win all those Thawfest competitions. And… I wish I could see them fall in love," he eventually said. A moment later the door opened with a loud creak, and Hiccup recognized the squeaking of his son's wheelchair.
"Uuuuuugh, I wish I could unsee it. Believe me, Dad, it's not worth it. I had to watch her and Hamish make googly eyes at each other all day! This is worse than when she had her crush on Ingrid Lodbrok! Or how Leifnir and Rufflout kept looking at each other after sleeping together that after Gand's birthday party!" Claybones ranted as he wheeled himself into the house.
"What are you talking about? Ingrid? Thora liked Ingrid? And what is this about Leifnir and Rufflout sleeping together?!" Astrid said angrily, standing up, and Hiccup could hear his son's sharp inhale.
"Wait, that wasn't actually common knowledge? I thought it was obvious, given how they interact, you'd have to be blind not to- Uh, sorry Dad didn't mean it like that. I mean, how can you miss it? And all the other stuff that's going on around Berk. Like today, I can't even look away from Thora and her new Scottish love without seeing old man Sven still trying to woo Mrs. Anderson, and obviously the Hokkersdotters are going through a rough patch, Mr. Hokkersdotter was buying jewelry, always indicates marital problems. I'm pretty sure his wife is cheating, just not sure with who. Either Trader Hansen or that emissary from the Meatheads. Maybe both," Clay said, clearly letting out some frustration. Hiccup laughed nervously.
"Look son, it's… impressive that you can notice all of that, it's just that most people don't. So you shouldn't assume everyone knows all the secrets you figure out with a glance," he slowly said, head still spinning from all these revelations.
"I know that! I'm the only one who understands how people work, apparently! Gods, it's the worst! Nobody understands my pain! Least of all Thora, she didn't even notice Hamish quickly hiding his red handkerchief in his back pocket when he saw she was interested in him. My guess is it's a gift from another girl. But can I tell her that? Can I be a good brother and warn her that her new crush is a womanizer? Noooooo, because that's 'gossiping' and 'spreading rumors'," Clay ranted, wheeling himself through the living room to the back where his bedroom was.
"Just go to bed. I think you drank too much, you're a little too angry, Clay. And don't ruin this for your sister," Astrid said sharply, making Clay groan.
"Fiiiine. I'm going, I'm going. And I won't tell her. She'll figure it out by herself. Eventually. The hard way. And that's when I can warn her about everything the next boy is doing. Or girl. She swings both ways," he said, maneuvering his chair around so he could open the door to his bedroom.
"That's quite enough. We'll talk about this in the morning. I know you mean well, but you're not thinking clearly right now," Hiccup said, turning so he faced his son, even if he couldn't see him.
The only response was a slammed door.
"See? He's going through awful puberty but he's still completely honest with us," Astrid whispered, sitting down next to him again.
"A little too honest. Gods, I did not want to know about the Hokkersdotters. Or Snot's daughter and Leifnir. Do you think he's right about everything he said?" Hiccup said, covering his head with his hands.
"Probably. Drunk or not, Clay is good at reading people. Thor almighty, and to think I was bothered by Thora looking at other people. It's our son for whom the eyes are the window to the soul. I wonder if he figured out any of our secrets," Astrid chuckled. Hiccup tried not to think too much about that.
"Well, at least my face is hard to read, right?" he joked, grabbing Astrid's hand.
"Hah, you wish. You're an open book. You can't hide any emotions. If I can figure out what you think, so can he. And anyone else on Berk for that matter," Astrid laughed. He couldn't help but laugh with her.
They sat together for a while, hands intertwined, and Hiccup figured that even if they could actually look into each other's eyes, they wouldn't be any closer than they already were.
A/N: I’m (finally) back with another one-shot in my Blindcup series. Only 6 left! I promise I will finish them all! This one takes place immediately after the previous chapter.
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"Knock knock! Astrid, are you there? Hiccup?" Kirsten called out, frowning when no one came to open the door to her daughter's house. Maybe they were enjoying each other, making full use of the honeymoon they were only halfway through? It'd make sense. Kirsten remembered her own honeymoon fondly, even if they had really been too young for married life.
Still, she didn't trust the silence in the house. The window was open, so if the newlyweds were… occupied, surely she'd hear something. She walked over, looking into the living room and preparing to glance away if they happened to be busy on the kitchen table.
Huh. No sign of them. Some dishes were left on the table, with traces of breakfast, probably from this morning. So it wasn't like they were sleeping late. Wouldn't be like Astrid anyway, the girl was always up with the sun, and right now it was almost noon. Surely they hadn't broken the tradition and sneaked out? Hiccup did like to break traditions, but no, not possible. Toothless and Stormfly were still staying with her and Tolfdir.
Kirsten sighed, debating leaving the basket full of food on their doorstep or just coming back later, when a sound reached her, coming from behind the house.
She walked around the house, eyes widening when she saw the state of the treeline. All of the trunks had deep gashes, like a great monster had swept through and sharpened its claws on them. A few trees had been felled, but not cleanly like they had been chopped for firewood. No, their leafs and branches were left intact, sticking out among the bushes were they had fallen.
An axe flew into the forest, glistening in the bright sun. It struck a battered tree, sinking deep into the ancient wood. The bark groaned, and for a moment Kirsten feared it would fall as well.
A blonde girl stomped over, grabbing the axe handle and wrenching it out with a loud cry. She then marched back to a spot where the grass was stomped and yellowed, before throwing the axe again.
Kirsten waited until she was sure her daughter didn't have a deadly weapon in her hand before announcing her presence.
"Knock knock! Is this a bad time?" she asked, walking into the 'yard', the little cleared area near their back door between the hot spring and the forest. Astrid jumped, hand straying to her leg for a second, surely to grab a dagger. Oh, her daughter was so much like her father, always prepared for attacks.
"No, I… We aren't supposed to talk, I thought. Are you here to drop off the food?" Astrid said, clearly shaken by her sudden arrival.
"Well, I was, but it looks like something's going on here. Something that warrants me bending the rules a little. Why aren't you inside with your husband? Where is Hiccup, by the way?" Kirsten asked, putting her hand on her daughter's shoulder and gently squeezing.
"He's locked himself in his workshop, I think. I don't know. Things are weird between us," Astrid slowly said with a deep sigh. Kirsten frowned, putting the basket of food down and leading her daughter to one of the fallen trees. A part near the base had no branches, so it provided a place for them to sit.
"Oh dear, what's going on? I hope you don't think that marrying was too hasty or something. You'd been stuck in the same stage for years, you two needed to move up a bit!" Kirsten said, sitting down. Astrid hesitated for a second before sitting next to her.
"I don't know! It's like… I love him, okay? I love him so much and ever since we… Ever since the wedding night it feels like that love is so much more complete. But at the same time I am just… annoyed at everything he does! We have these stupid fights about stupid nothings and yet they're not nothings and it doesn't make sense. Before this honeymoon we rarely fought, at least not over random stuff like… who should do the dishes or where to put whetstones! But now we… I don't know, we're avoiding each other? Except we're also not, we do… you-know, a lot, and then we talk, but it's not about anything, just how much we love each other. It's so confusing!" Astrid said, almost in one breath. Kirsten was sure she had been holding these things in for two weeks now, and she remembered why she hated that stupid rule about honeymoon isolation.
"Come here," she simply said, opening her arms wide. Astrid shook her head for a second, but then she all but jumped into her arms. Soft sniffs followed.
"There, there. It's okay to feel this way. I think I know what's going on, but before I explain let's just let everything out, okay? You've been cooped up for too long!" she whispered, patting Astrid's back gently as she let out all the frustrations.
"Is this what the old men mean when they complain about married life? I thought we'd just… I didn't think we'd fight so much! I'm so miserable and yet I don't want to leave him either, he makes me happy!" Astrid said, clearly trying not to cry.
"Oh, love, it's gonna be okay. It's normal. Your father and I went through this as well when we got married. You know we got married… hastily, and I was already pregnant, but still," Kirsten said, slowly pulling Astrid out of the embrace so they could look at each other.
"You see, moving in together is a really really big step. You're gonna see parts of each other that you hadn't seen before, notice habits that annoy you, have to compromise on things you did separately."
"You know how in stories, characters have good and bad qualities, perks and flaws? In reality, a quality can seem both good and bad depending on the situation. Your boyfriend might seem really spontaneous and generous, always surprising you with gifts, but then when you're married and have shared finances, that suddenly becomes an inability to handle money. Maybe you always liked how Hiccup is rebellious and doesn't limit himself with tradition, but over time that can also be a lack of structure or makes him unreliable. You like how he works hard on new inventions all day, until he starts leaving his sketches and tools all over your house that you just cleaned," Kirsten explained, and Astrid slowly nodded.
"I… I guess that makes sense. We keep fighting over things we didn't have to deal with before. Who cleans the house, where to put our shared things, when to go to sleep. And in those things we… clash. But how do I fix that? I don't want to fight like this all the time!" she said, looking away and fiddling with her skirt.
"You talk about it calmly. Tolfdir and I have a rule that we never go to bed angry with each other. We always talk things out. It doesn't have to be right when you have a fight, sometimes you just need a break to cool down and think things over, but you do have to talk before it starts to fester. And then together you figure out what caused the fight, what a solution is to whatever the fight was about, and how you stop this from causing more fights in the future. It's… not always easy, but married life isn't easy. It's hard work, especially when you're stubborn like you and Hiccup are!" Kirsten chuckled. Astrid was silent for a while, but eventually nodded.
"I… I'll try that. But what if Hiccup doesn't want to cooperate?" she asked, looking up at the house with a nervous expression.
"Oh girl, I think Hiccup wants nothing more than to make things right, but he just doesn't know how. Neither of you knew how to make the first step. That boy doesn't hold grudges, you know that. And he loves you to bits, he won't stay angry at you. I think he's just a bit scared and claustrophobic right now. He probably misses Toothless, gods know that dragon misses him, and he misses flying and smithing and all his other routine. When you're handicapped like Hiccup that routine is very important, you know. So he's a little lost now, and he probably doesn't know how to ask you for help since you are just as lost and he doesn't want to burden you."
Astrid chuckled. "How do you always know what is going on in people's heads?"
"A lot of practice at the Great Hall, dear. That's all there is to it. Practice. So now, go back in there and practice making up with your husband! Freya, your husband! I can't believe I finally get to say that. Now I need a new routine as well, can't just tell you to get married anymore! Maybe I should start asking for grandkids, but I feel like you don't need my pushing for that!" she laughed, before standing up. Astrid blushed brightly.
"Thanks, Mother," she simply said, standing up as well.
"No problem. Remember that you can always ask me for help, no matter how old you get. I'm still your mom," Kirsten said, before giving Astrid the basket of food.
"Now go in there, eat this food, and figure things out with Hiccup. And then when this is all over you'll look back on this and laugh at how stupid you were," she said, walking back to the village. Astrid didn't follow, instead grabbing her axe and going back inside the house. Kirsten chuckled to herself, knowing those kids would be just fine.
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Hiccup sat in his workshop, digging in one of the piles of designs for an old sketch for an irrigation system. For a second he considered asking Astrid for help, but then he remembered why he had shut himself in here in the first place.
Actually, he didn't really know why. It felt like none of it made sense. Just two weeks ago he had been happier than he had ever been. He was married to the most wonderful woman in the world.
And now it had all turned to crap. It was like all they could do was fight over stupid things. Just this morning they had fought over whether bread should be buttered on both sides. Astrid had expressed surprise that he smeared both sides with big sweeps. He had made a joke in reply, thinking she was kidding, but then it somehow devolved into an argument about wasting valuable food and how he didn't know how expensive butter is.
Hiccup wasn't proud of the way he handled it: by running away into his workshop and slamming the door. A few seconds later the back door slammed as well, Astrid probably going outside for axe throwing.
Maybe this wouldn't all be for nothing if he could just work. This invention would help all the farmers on Berk, it was more important than this one stupid argument. He just had to find the damn sketch among all the other plates of copper by feeling them one by one.
His fingers ran over drawings of mills and saddles, houses and ships, but then he suddenly found a sketch of a clawhammer. The moment he realized what it was he froze. The copper fell to the floor with a loud bang.
Hiccup's hands shook as he picked it back up. This was the first thing he and Astrid designed together. Just two weeks after he woke up without his leg. They developed their routine as they worked on this simple tool. His throat filled up, and he suddenly wished they could go back to that simpler time.
Where had it all gone wrong? Back then they didn't fight like this! They worked together as easy as breathing.
His free hand balled into a fist as he tried to stay strong. Why did he have to be so useless?! Normally when something was broken Astrid and him would work together to fix it, but this… This was something broken between them.
He wished he could ask somebody. Gobber, his dad, Toothless, Cami. But no, he was stuck inside this damn house for another two weeks, alone with his thoughts and the love of his life he could only make love or fight with.
Gods, his entire mind was messed up from it all. Their intimacy had only made things more complicated, making them closer than ever even as they had arguments over mundane things.
A soft sob escaped his throat despite his best efforts. More followed. Just as he tried to get it back under control there was a knock on the door. It was a gentle knock, not like Astrid's usual angry knocks.
"Hiccup? Can we talk?" Astrid's voice called through the door, soft and vulnerable. In his surprise he sniffed loudly, and he instantly knew Astrid could tell he was crying.
"Hic… I'm not angry. Not anymore, and I just… I hate this situation. I hate that we're fighting so much and I want to make it right. And I suspect you hate it just as much. So can I come in? Or do you want to come out?"
Another sob wrenched itself from his throat despite his best efforts. Oh gods, what a mess. What would Astrid think of him? But still… he trusted her. Despite the tension of the past few weeks he knew she would never laugh at him. So he stumbled to the door on unsteady legs, copper plate still in his hand. His fingers trembled as he unlocked the latch.
The door slowly swung open, the creaking the only sound apart from the soft sniffs he tried to suppress.
Hiccup didn't know what to say or do, waiting for Astrid to enter the dark room and give him clarity.
"We've both been complete idiots."
Out of all the things he imagined her saying, that was not something he had expected. His very eloquent response was "Uh-huh."
"Look, I've did a lot of thinking and… and I realized that neither of us were prepared for this change. Living together, having to figure out how to divide chores and share a house and be together literally all the time. But that doesn't mean we can't figure this out now. We're adults, we're married, we can talk about this, right? So… can we? Calmly, without getting angry?" she softly asked, voice so fragile it broke Hiccup's heart too.
"I… I want nothing more. But I don't know how," he managed to say, sitting down in his chair.
"Well, how a conversation works is that I say something, and then you say something, and then I say something again-" she deadpanned.
"Haha, very funny," he said, genuinely chuckling. Gods, it felt good to laugh with her again.
"Seriously though. Can we try, at least? How about this morning? Can we please just talk about what went wrong during that stupid fight?" Astrid slowly said, hopping on the workbench next to him.
"Okay. Alright. I'll try. I guess for me it just went so fast. At first I thought you were just joking, teasing. But then two sentences later we were shouting at each other and slamming doors and I don't understand how that happened so fast," he explained, turning away a bit.
"Thing is, I wasn't joking. And when you acted like I was it felt like you weren't taking me seriously. You know money is not an easy topic for me. I shouldn't have shouted, though. And I'm sorry I did. I should have just explained that," Astrid said, putting her hand on his shoulder.
"I'm… I suppose that makes sense. I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have run away. I just… I feel like I'm suffocating lately. And that's not you, I love you so much and I want to be with you, but I miss blacksmithing and Toothless and going to the cove and flying and so much more. And it feels like all I can do this month is design things in this workshop without my blacksmithing tools, and talk to you about dumb stuff. And that leads to arguments about dumb stuff. I'm sorry, I guess I'm just frustrated and have taken that out on you. You didn't deserve that," he slowly said, awkwardly moving his hand to grab hers, squeezing softly.
"No, I didn't, and you didn't deserve my anger either. Maybe I was also scared, scared that we got married too quickly, that we aren't ready for this yet. But as long as we can just talk about it later, before it starts to fester, we should be alright."
Hiccup nodded, squeezing her hand again. They sat in comfortable silence for a while. Oddly, it was like this was the most intimate thing they had done so far, despite all the lovemaking that had happened before.
"Was that the entire conversation? Is everything out now?" Astrid suddenly asked.
"You know, I think it was," he said, awed at how much lighter he felt. There were a few seconds of silence, and then he had to scream his thoughts: "That was so easy!"
"We are so stupid!" Astrid shouted, before doubling over with laughter. Hiccup couldn't help but laugh as well, before gently pulling her off the workbench and onto his lap so he could hug her.
"Oh, you're amazing. Let's never be this ridiculous again. Next time we talk calmly about things, okay?" he asked, sensing her nod.
"Yes, let's try that. But you know, Hiccup, there's something good that comes from dumb fights…" Astrid said, her tone teasing. He frowned, unsure of what she meant.
"We get to have make-up sex," she chuckled, grinding on his lap, and he moaned softly. Oh gods. Hiccup was sure that next time they fought things wouldn't spiral out of control anymore. He just had to survive Astrid's endless stamina.
Hey everyone, I'm back with another drabble. This one takes place during the first half of their honeymoon! Next day's drabble, Making Up Afterwards, will be a sequel/conclusion to this one, so don't worry: They'll realize how dumb they're being and figure out how to live together.
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Day 1
Astrid woke up at dawn as usual, though she instantly felt on alert. The blanket she was lying under had a different texture, and a sunbeam hit her face at a different angle than it normally did. She kept her eyes closed, groaning softly at the ache in her thighs when she shifted. What was going on? Her brain was too sluggish for this.
All of a sudden something moved behind her, and then something cold and rough touched the back of her leg. Her naked leg. She yelped loudly, jumping away from the freezing thing behind her. Cold air all over her body told her she was naked, and she instinctively grabbed the blankets and wrapped them around herself.
"Astrid? What's wrong?" Hiccup's voice mumbled, and it was only then that Astrid realized that he was in the bed with her.
Just as naked as she was, everything on display now that she snatched the blanket.
Everything came flooding back. They got married yesterday. They moved into their own house, made love, and this was the first day of their new life together.
"'Strid? Are you hurt?" Hiccup asked again, clearly still sleepy.
"No, no, it's… sorry, I'm not used to waking up with someone else. I panicked. But it's okay now," she told him, pressing herself against him and pulling the blanket back over them. "Your feet- Uh, foot, is freezing cold, by the way."
He chuckled awkwardly, and memories of last night came flooding back. That explained the soreness. But it was a good soreness. Like the ache she got when she did a new training exercise.
"I guess we'll have to warm up then," he mumbled, pulling her a little closer to him (oh gods, he was cold everywhere!). She turned her head to see his smirk. Huh, that's a different attitude from last night. But not an entirely unwelcome one, despite the fading soreness. She'd had worse pains.
"Oh, getting cocky, eh? Ready for more?" she asked, climbing on top of him. She was about to kiss him when her leg brushed his foot again.
"Okay, seriously though, I really hope that foot won't always be this cold," Astrid said, before they stopped talking for a while.
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Day 3
"Astrid, where is my whetstone? I put it on the workbench yesterday but now it's gone!" Hiccup shouted, blindly digging through the pile of scrap metal and chips of wood that was stacked in his workshop.
"I don't know! You probably misplaced it! You know, it's been two days and the place is already a mess!" she shouted back as he dropped a sheet of metal he had been looking under. It clanged loudly as it hit his prosthetic, echoing through the house with an angry chime.
"Kicking it won't help!" Astrid said, entering behind him. Her words made him want to actually kick something.
"I didn't- It fell, okay. And it's not a mess. I have a system. A system that you interfere with," he said, breathing heavily in an attempt to keep his temper.
"Oh really, I always figured the system was that you just put stuff on the pile closest to you. And then when you inevitably forget which pile you put what in, you ask me to find it for you," she said in a teasing tone, but it stung all the same.
"It's not like that! You never pay attention-" he forced himself to stop there. Finishing that accusation would lead to nothing good.
"Look, it's right here, in between these very precariously stacked piles of jagged metal. Real safe there, Hiccup," Astrid said, pushing him aside to take something from the bench.
"Says the girl who nearly threw an axe into my head this morning," he muttered, remembering the terror he had felt at the cold iron grazing his cheek when he walked outside to get some water.
"Oh, come on, you know the backyard is my place, I train there, even when we're cooped up in this house!" she said, slamming the whetstone into his open hand. He flinched, nearly dropping the small tool.
"Well, this room is my place, so how about you stop complaining about my stuff in here, and I stop talking about your axe throwing out there!" Hiccup shouted, turning away from her. Some part of him wanted out, wanted to run as far away from this stupid argument as possible. But isn't this what married life is supposed to be? Always being together, happy in the same space all the time?
"Fine! But don't call me next time you lose something," Astrid shouted, leaving the room.
"And I won't fix your axe when you hit the rocks again!" he shouted back. The only response he got was the door slamming hard, shaking in its hinges. He felt like a complete idiot. But surely this was over, they established their boundaries for some personal space, and now they could move on.
Just 24 days to go until the Honeymoon was over.
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Day 8
Astrid flinched, dropping the soap she was holding when the loud crack of shattering earthenware rang through the room. She turned around to see shards all over the floor of what had been her mug just two seconds ago.
"Hiccup!" she shouted, taking the soap again and putting it away as he stood there sheepishly, surrounded by the broken shards.
"Sorry! I didn't know it was there! The counter was empty a minute ago so I wanted to put my plate away!" he said defensively, not moving to clean it up. His dirty plate sat on the counter where the mug had been, and for second she got the ridiculous urge to smash it as revenge.
"Yeah, I put it there to wash it. Like I was gonna wash your dirty dishes," she snarked instead.
"Hey, you have a dirty plate too, it's not just my mess," he said, still not doing anything about the shards on the floor.
"Funny since I always seem to be the one to do the dishes. You just put them on the counter and expect them to magically clean themselves!"
Astrid didn't know what it was about this honeymoon that made her just so… annoyed at everything Hiccup did. Things that had been endearing or cute while they were just dating, like how he never dared to get in her way, or his bumbling when he broke something, were now infuriating.
Maybe it was the fact that they had gone so suddenly from living separately with their families to being forced to be in the same house together for literally an entire month. Before Astrid had been able to get away and cool off if he did something annoying, and she didn't have to endure the stupid habits he had that she never noticed.
Like how he kept making this ticking sound with his tongue, or would roll over constantly in his sleep, or barely offered to help her with housework.
It was so confusing. Astrid still loved him so much, still wanted him so much. Despite their fights they could barely keep their hands off each other, taking advantage of every flat surface in the house.
Sometimes it was like everything Hiccup did either infuriated her or turned her on. It was a confusing whirlwind of emotions that she just hadn't expected three years into their relationship.
"I don't do the dishes because the last time I tried, you complained I missed spots I couldn't see!" Hiccup shouted, and she was brought back to their current argument.
"Fine, just go and… do your thing. I'll clean your mess. Again," she sighed, grabbing some big shards and throwing them in the trash. For a second Hiccup looked really sad and guilty, and she thought he was going to say something, but then the moment passed. He turned and left the kitchen, slamming the door to his workshop with a loud bang.
She knew it wouldn't last, that in a few hours they'd be all over each other again and declaring their love amidst heavy sighs and deep moans, but that didn't mean she wasn't worried about these fights. What if they'd get worse?
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Day 13
"Hiccup, come to bed!" Astrid shouted as he sketched his newest invention: a sewing machine that could do the work of 8 spinsters.
"Just a minute," he mumbled, ignoring her long groan.
"That's what you said an hour ago! That's it, I'm going to bed now. You better not wake me when you finally get tired."
"That's the first time you complain about my inventing at night," he chuckled. There was a short silence that suddenly ended with a smack when Astrid threw a pillow at him.
"Because back then we didn't get to sleep together dammit! Gods, I thought it was the men always trying to get their women into their bed, not the other way around!" she shouted, and Hiccup wasn't entirely sure if she was actually angry or just joking. Either way, the remark stung, and he couldn't help stinging back.
"At least this way I'm not freezing you with my cold feet."
He almost instantly regretted the words, but Astrid's growl only made him want to dig in further.
"Fine, have it your way. I'm going to sleep now and if you wake me later, I swear to Thor…" she muttered, grabbing the pillow from where it had bounced off to and getting in bed with a loud huff.
"Good night," he said, more sarcastic than really necessary.
"...G'night" eventually came from the bed, very softly like she didn't really want him to hear it. It made him feel guilty. Still, this machine he was sketching required his focus, so he refused to listen to Astrid's breathing slowly turning to snoring.
Even when her snores quieted Hiccup had a hard time focusing on the invention. His thoughts kept turning back to the past two weeks they lived together. Before he hadn't expected it to change their lives much. They already spent a lot of their waking hours together; marrying just added their non-waking hours. And yet something had shifted, and he wasn't sure what it was.
Maybe the source of his frustrations and snarkiness wasn't really her, maybe it was just being stuck in this house for the honeymoon. He missed Toothless, and their morning flights. But no, the council had decided that the honeymoon isolation included their dragons. So he didn't get to fly, didn't get to play with his best friend.
And yet it wasn't just that either. Astrid could be so overbearing, so imposing, and that gigantic presence was hard when they were stuck inside such a tiny house. He felt like he was suffocating at times, like he couldn't even breathe without her noticing something that would lead to a fight.
Maybe that was why he was still awake now, long after she had gone to sleep. He felt free somehow. Alone.
Could there be such a thing as 'too much Astrid' in his life? Just two weeks ago he'd have said no. Now he wasn't sure. His thoughts kept going in circles, veering between annoyance at some of the things she had said and guilt over what he had shouted back.
It was only when he crawled into bed behind her hours later, as gently as he could to avoid disturbing her, that he whispered "I love you, and I'm sorry," in her sleeping ear.
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