love myself today. @womanicarus - Tumblr Blog

I think for the first time I just realized how truly traumatized I am. Normal people don’t think or behave in this way. Their brains don’t tell them that they deserve to hurt, or remind them of their constant feelings of unworthiness. Their insecurities don’t make them panic and shit down.

Wow I wonder what if feels like to live like that.

sergle

like if a drink is gonna taste bad, then I want it to at least Fuck Me Up, and if a drink isn’t gonna fuck me up, then i want it to taste real nice. but you can’t have a drink that both fails to fuck you up, AND fails to taste good. that’s cheating. and that’s beer.

unstablemotions

I love not being able to create deep, emotional bonds with other people due to neglect and other abuse from my primary caregivers leaving me not trusting of others and believing I'm not worth anyone's time

jaubaius

Penguins getting weighed.

t3sticles

Penguine lady: good boy! Who’s a good boy!

Penguine: [UNGODLY SHRIEKS OF TERROR]

skinhorses

tender quotes:

1. “The number of hours we have together is actually not so large. Please linger near the door uncomfortably instead of just leaving. Please forget your scarf in my life and come back later for it.” (mikko harvey, from “for m,”)

2. “I still feel like the world is a piece of bread, I’m holding out half to you.” (eileen myles)

3. “Wherever you are it’s okay. You can come back from it. Whatever happened to you down there, whatever the world looks like now, that’s not how it always looks. That’s not how it’s always going to look. There’s more. There’s always more.” (patrick ness, from “more than this”)

4. “I was making dinner and I got a message. Go look outside, she said, go look at the sunset. My apartment is small, with four rooms and two windows that don’t see much light so I had no idea. I pulled my coat on and hurried out. I was running to this sunset, suddenly the only thing that mattered. I hurried past the taller buildings to the park and the sky was leaking shades of pink and purple. It was beautiful and fleeting, there one minute and gone the next. I would’ve missed it; I almost kissed it. And so I started thinking, how great it would be to get a nudge, a tap on your shoulder, a moment or two before your life changes. Stop what you’re doing and look around, you’ll want to remember this later. In a minute, you’re going to fall in love.” (kelsey danielle, from “unexpected sunset”)

5. “Today is a day like any other: twenty-four hours, a little sunshine, a little rain. Listen, says ambition, nervously shifting her weight from one boot to another―why don’t you get going? For there I am, in the mossy shadows, under the trees. And to tell the truth I don’t want to let go of the wrists of idleness, I don’t want to sell my life for money, I don’t even want to come in out of the rain.” (mary oliver, from “black oaks”)

sa-dnesss

wingedbeings

I fucking hate when people say “they didnt mean to hurt you, they love you” like shut up!!!!! how would you even know!!! and I dont care if they do, they fucking destroyed me!!! this isn’t love!!!!

lifeafterpsychiatry

Can we please stop associating being a good person with how much you're willing to suffer in silence for other people? You can be a kind person and still say "no, I don't have the time/energy to help you with that." You can be a kind person and still say "this makes me uncomfortable, please stop." You can be a kind person and still say "I disagree and here's why." You can be kind and still say "I'm not okay with this." Being kind is about treating people with kindness and respect, not about being the human equivalent of a doormat!

lifeinpoetry

I do not know,

I never did, what the hell any human heart was ever doing.

— Annah Browning, from “Suicide Ghost,” Witch Doctrine

leescoresbies

“I’m always thinking of going back. When Lot’s wife looked over her shoulder, she turned into a pillar of salt. Pillars hold things up, and salt keeps things clean, but it’s a poor exchange for losing yourself. People do go back, but they don’t survive, because two realities are claiming them at the same time.”

— Jeanette Winterson, Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit (via kuanios)

rottingmuse

As opposed to that quote about “the horrifying ordeal of being known,” do y’all ever feel so positively UNKNOWN and UNSEEN that it frightens you? Like there’s a self that you feel on the inside, and you believe to be “you,” but it seems like nobody else sees that version of you? And they’re interacting with someone that isn’t you but a projection of their experience of you? What’s more, perhaps nobody will ever know your true essence and you will die without ever being fully realized????? I’m only two beers in honestly

trapcard

“if you ever need to talk to me about an issue i’m here for you” =/= “it’s completely okay for you to only talk to me when you can use me as an emotional trashcan”