Bay

just an outlet

[hilyad]

[ily-a]

ANNE WITH AN E 3.10 | The Better Feeling of My Heart

[wonderfullittlemess]

I can’t even remember who I am anymore.

I used to be so outgoing and social. I loved makeup, getting myself ready for the day and planning things to do. It used to be so simple for me.

It started changing when I began giving myself to other people. Putting everyone else’s needs before my own. Now I’m totally lost.

I know I love being a mother and a wife. My family is my world. But I miss myself. My goals and ambitions.

Most days I feel lonely and misunderstood. I take care of everything in the home. No breaks. 24/7. My anxiety overwhelms me most of the day. I know I deserve things for myself, apart from my family, that make me happy.

Please don’t ever feel guilty for missing a part of you that used to be, or trying to get her back.

[wonderfullittlemess]

I miss her. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a mother. But sometimes I miss myself. I miss the version of myself before kids. I feel so lost sometimes. I truly can’t remember who I was before I was a mom. There’s no such thing as free time or a minute alone when you have little ones. Not to mention the feeling of being over touched by the end of the night. My kids are my world. My everything. But I miss her.

[wonderfullittlemess]

Can we please talk about postpartum? It’s beautiful but it’s also very real and raw. I don’t really think many people understand how much of a rollercoaster it is. Once you hold that beautiful baby in your arms, there’s no other feeling like it. The emotions that flood in after that are extremely intense. I just had my second child two weeks ago and I’m all over the place. I find myself crying for no reason and feeling extremely overwhelmed. Transitioning from one child to two was very hard for me. How do I get my 3 year old to understand that his sister just needs more of my attention right now? It upsets him when I can’t tend to him right away and the guilt I feel is tremendous. On top of that, we are a military family so we don’t have any family near us. Postpartum is beautiful. Postpartum is real. Postpartum is ugly. Postpartum is a bitch. A woman’s body can do so many amazing things. Creating a life is a beautiful thing. But I don’t think we should sugar coat it either.

[chrisschrissy]

[wonderfullittlemess]

Postpartum is hard.

No one ever really talks about it much. How much your hormones change and the many emotions that you feel.

Bringing another life into this world is a beautiful thing. The whole process is quite miraculous. But it’s not a walk in the park either. I’m so grateful I was able to carry two beautiful, healthy children and bring them into the world. But the truth is, I’m drained.

The mom guilt is probably the worst. Feeling like you aren’t good enough for them and aren’t spending enough time. Getting so frustrated and eventually crying for hours with them.

I love being a mother. It’s the most rewarding thing I’ve ever done, but we need to normalize talking about the ugly. The stretch marks, the sickness, the aches and pains. We need to talk about postpartum. The anxiety, baby blues and depression that come along with it. We are only human. We’re humans that brought tiny humans into this world and that’s an amazing thing.

It’s also very hard.

[womanintheword]

Motherhood is sleepless nights and endless feedings and dirty diapers and cold coffee and holding your bladder and forgetting to feed yourself and screaming fits and tears (not just the baby) and mom guilt and mom guilt and mom guilt But motherhood is also first smiles and laughing while dreaming and little toes and fingers and that baby smell–you know the one–and cuddles and cute clothes and discovering–people, places, smells, books–together and grace and love and love and love

[poetaciumenta]