synopsis | after a big argument with jake, your clingy and overly sensitive boyfriend, aka golden retriever, finds it impossible to handle the distance. and let’s face it, who can resist a teary-eyed, overly affectionate guy who’s one step away from curling up in your lap?
pairing | clingyboyfriend! jake x fem! reader
genre | fluff
jake was the kind of person who felt everything too much. it wasn’t a bad thing, he just had a heart so soft it bruised too easily. he was sensitive in a way that made him beautiful, like he carried every emotion so deeply it became a part of him. and when he loved, he loved hard. clingy, desperate, like he didn’t know how to exist without the people he cared about.
he was clingy too, always needing to be close, to touch, to hold. he followed you around the house like a lost puppy, watching you with those big, pleading eyes. he never liked distance, never liked silence between you.
and right now the house was too quiet. not in a peaceful way, but in that heavy, suffocating way that settled after an argument. you both said things you didn’t mean, and he ended up crying. jake always cried during fights. he hated it, tried so hard to hold it back, but he could never help it.
you were sitting on the couch, watching a movie, one you had been watching with him before everything went wrong. your eyes were glued to the screen, pretending to care about what was happening on it, but really, you couldn’t focus.
then you heard the faint sound of footsteps coming from the hallway. you didn’t look up, keeping your gaze fixed on the screen, you knew it was jake. you already saw his messy hair from the corner of your eye, his face poking around the corner of the living room, just enough to make sure you saw him. he didn’t say anything right away, just stood there, watching you with those puppy eyes of his. you didn’t look at him. you couldn’t.
he sighed softly, so soft you barely heard it, and took a slow step into the room. his shoulders were slumped, his hands fidgeting with the hem of his shirt, clearly unsure of what to do next.
he shifted closer, then gently slid down to sit beside you, his leg brushing against yours. “i… i don’t like when you’re mad at me..” he mumbled, voice quieter now, almost a whisper. his head dropped to your shoulder, his hair brushing against your skin. you could feel the subtle tremble in his body, the way he leaned into you, needing your comfort, even though you were still angry.
you didn’t say anything, didn’t have to. your shoulder relaxed, just enough for him to rest there without feeling rejected. but even with that small gesture, he still felt uncertain, still felt like he wasn’t allowed to hold you the way he wanted to.
his fingers twitched against your arm before hesitantly gripping onto the sleeve of your shirt, his hold weak, like he was afraid you’d shake him off. he sniffled softly, his breath uneven, and when he spoke again, his voice was so quiet, so broken, it made your chest ache.
“i’m sorry..” he whispered again, barely audible, like he was running out of strength to even say the words. his face buried deeper into your shoulder, and that’s when you felt it. the faint dampness of his tears soaking into your sleeve.
he was still crying. maybe he never really stopped after the argument, just hid away in the bedroom, curled up and upset until he finally couldn’t take the distance anymore.
his body curled into yours instinctively, his arms hesitating before wrapping loosely around you, his grip weak, desperate. “please don’t ignore me…” his voice cracked this time “i hate the silent treatment. it makes me feel like… like i’m in time-out.”
his words wobbled, thick with tears, his breath uneven as he sniffled against your skin.
god, he was so pretty when he cried. his lips were parted, glossy from where he had nervously chewed at them, his big, watery eyes peeking up at you through damp lashes. his cheeks were flushed, his whole face soft and open, so heartbreakingly vulnerable.
you sighed, your fingers twitched before you finally gave in, reaching up to cup his cheek, and he melted instantly, his entire body going boneless against you like he had been waiting for that touch.
“you’re not in time-out, jake.” you murmured, still a little firm, but gentler than before. “but you did piss me off.”
he nodded quickly, his curls bouncing against your shoulder. “i know.” he mumbled, still sniffly, still so soft and needy. “but i don’t wanna be mad at each other anymore. can we just… can we be okay now?”
he looked up at you then, eyes big and pleading, so impossibly pretty, and you sighed, feeling the last of your frustration slip away.
instead of answering, you leaned down and kissed his cheek. just a quick press of your lips, light and fleeting. but then he made this tiny, breathless sound, like he couldn’t believe you were kissing him after all that, and it made something in you soften completely.
so you did it again. and again.
a little kiss on the tip of his nose. then one on his jaw, lingering just slightly. then another right at the corner of his mouth, where his lips were still wobbly from crying.
jake blinked up at you, dazed, his breath stuttering like he didn’t know what to do with himself. and then, without thinking, he surged forward, pressing his face against yours, clumsily chasing after your lips.
his kisses were messy, desperate, all over the place. he kissed your cheek, your chin, your forehead—anywhere he could reach. his hands were gripping at your waist now, still shaky but holding on a little tighter, like he never wanted to let go.
“i love you..” he mumbled between kisses, his voice still stuffy from crying. “i love you, i love you, i love you—”
you laughed softly, tilting his face up so you could kiss him properly, slow and sweet, until he sighed into your mouth and melted against you completely.
he made this tiny sound against your lips, something between a sigh and a whimper. his hands trembled where they clung to you, fingers curling tighter into the fabric of your shirt.
“missed you..” he whispered between kisses, his nose bumping against yours. “hated being away from you…”
“i was right here, jake,” you murmured, your fingers slipping into his curls, gently scratching at his scalp. he shivered under your touch, melting even further into you.
“no..” he sniffled, shaking his head against your skin. “felt too far.”
you sighed, kissing the top of his head, feeling the way he practically purred at the affection. he was always like this, too soft, too clingy, too desperate for closeness, especially after a fight.
“you’re so dramatic..” you muttered, but your arms wrapped around him anyway, pulling him even closer.
he let out a breathy, content little sigh, pressing a few more lazy, sleepy kisses along your collarbone. “only for you.” he mumbled, voice barely above a whisper.
synopsis: in the halls of the palace, where secrets are dressed in silk and love is the greatest betrayal, a maid finds herself caught in a dangerous entanglement with the crown prince, jungwon. though bound by duty and royalty, their stolen glances and whispered promises bloom into something neither can escape. but when the queen announces his arranged marriage, everything shatters.
pairing: prince! heir to future throne! jungwon x maid! reader
genre: historical royal romance, angst, forbidden love, smut
content warning: forbidden love, royalty vs. heart, emotional betrayal, class divide, political manipulation, dramatic confrontations, sacrifice, smut.
a/n: hii, i was finally able to upload this small project on which i have been working for several weeks (maybe months). i often run out of ideas or have a mental block to continue writing, so it usually takes me a few days for that inspiration to come back with more ideas. i want to clarify that I tried as much as I could and tried as much as possible that the dialogues had that style of royalty, noble, old-fashioned or dramatic. i hope you enjoy this it really took me long time and I hope you at least like it a little.
i. the garden kiss
your plans that night were simple. finish polishing the candelabras in the east wing, drop off the basket of white linens in the laundry, and finally retreat to your quarters to rest. nothing unusual. nothing that hinted you’d end up with the prince’s lips pressed against yours, hidden behind a bush covered in blooming hydrangeas.
but here you are.
your heart racing, his highness’s fingers barely resting on your waist like even the slightest touch might shatter you. his breath is warm, scented faintly with jasmine tea and unsaid promises, and his eyes… those eyes that never stop looking at you like you’re the most treasured secret in the kingdom.
“milady…” he whispers, pulling back just slightly, his fingers still on your cheek. “do you know how long i’ve longed for this?”
you can hardly answer. because even though it’s been weeks of sneaking off to see him, you’re still not used to how it feels to be kissed by a prince, the prince jungwon, who looks at you like you’re anything but just a servant.
your dress hem is dusty with soil, your hands still a little rough from the day’s work, and your hair is poorly tied with a frayed ribbon. but he never seems to care. he never has.
“my lord… if we’re caught…”
his brow furrowed. just a little. that gesture he made whenever something bothered him, even though he tried not to show it.
“milady…” he says, his voice low, almost a whisper. “i don’t care if we get caught. i couldn’t find you all morning. where were you?”
your hands tremble slightly at how close he is, how being with him like this feels both terrifying and perfect.
“i was… working.” you whisper, eyes falling to the flowers near your feet. it’s hard to look at him when he speaks with that kind of gentleness. “as i’m supposed to.”
he lets out a soft sigh, low and quiet. then his hand lifts to your face, tilting your chin with such delicate care that your breath hitches in your throat. his touch is gentle, too gentle for someone of his status. a prince shouldn’t touch a servant like that.
“working?” he repeats, raising a brow. “don’t you know that seeing you is far more important than any royal duty?”
he makes a dramatic little face, pretending to be offended, but his eyes sparkle with softness. his thumb gently brushes your cheek, and that stupidly charming smile of his doesn’t budge.
“i was about to launch a kingdom-wide search. or worse… interrogate every guard in the castle. do you know how bad that would look in the official records?”
you giggle softly, shaking your head, heat blooming on your cheeks.
“you missed me that much?”
“that much?” he echoes, smirking. “i almost wrote you a tragic letter and slipped it under your pillow. in golden ink, of course. signed: his royal highness, the hopelessly desperate prince.”
you cover your face with both hands, laughing while he leans closer, clearly proud of himself.
“what was the letter going to say?” you ask peeking your eyes through your fingers.
“something like… ‘my heart beats only for you, my radiant flower from the northern wing of the castle.’” he says, lowering his voice with mock seriousness, pressing his forehead against yours. “though… i still have time to write it. maybe it’ll convince you to sneak off with me more often.”
you bite your lip, heart fluttering like crazy. “you’re ridiculous.”
“and you’re enchanting, milady.” he says without missing a beat, whispering so close you can almost feel the smile on his lips. “now give me five more minutes before duty drags you away again, will you?
“actually… “you murmur, glancing toward the dark path. “i’m done for the day. i was on my way to my quarters.”
“to sleep?” he asks, with a look of mild betrayal, like you just insulted him.
you nod, a bit amused, and he immediately steps ahead, subtly blocking your way like it’s a royal obligation.
“milady, i’m afraid i cannot allow that.”
“excuse me?” you raise a brow, trying not to laugh.
“i spent the whole morning without seeing you.” he says, bowing dramatically like he’s putting on a show. “and now you want to simply… go to sleep? without letting me steal at least a few smiles?”
“jungwon…”
“yes, milady?” he responds with that face. that impossibly sweet, infuriatingly charming face.
he takes your hand and gently lifts it to his lips without breaking eye contact. his mouth brushes over your knuckles in the softest kiss imaginable, warm and lingering.
“just five minutes.” he whispers. “i’ll let you go after. though… i can’t promise i won’t steal one more kiss first.”
“just one…” you say, lifting a finger.
“one very long one.” he corrects with a mischievous grin, and before you can protest, he’s already pulling you in, his nose brushing yours, his voice soft enough to make your knees go weak. “i can’t help it, milady. there’s something about you that makes me want to break every rule in the kingdom.”
you fall silent, heart thudding faster than any royal horse could gallop. he leans in a little closer, and just when you think he’s about to kiss you, he murmurs.
“besides… i can’t let you go to sleep without wishing you sweet dreams”
“you’re going to wish me sweet dreams with your lips?” you ask, trying not to giggle. you bite your lip, and of course he notices, he always does. his eyes drop to your mouth, and he smiles again.
“of course.”
and then he does. it’s a soft kiss, sweet, so tender it feels like it was stolen out of a fairytale. and in that moment, you forget the castle walls, the titles, the fact that he’s the crown prince and you’re just a servant.
because right there, between bushes and whispers, he’s just jungwon. your jungwon.
after your encounter with the prince you made your way to the shared servants quarters, tucked away in the quieter wing of the castle. far from the golden halls and polished staircases that royalty walked. your room was small, simple, and lit by a few flickering candles. stone walls surrounded you, cold and silent, but the soft glow and warmth of your friendship with gisselle made it feel almost safe.
the candles were still lit, though dim, their wax spilling over the edges of their holders, pooling like forgotten time. the room was quiet, save for the soft creak of the wooden floor beneath your bare feet. your nightgown brushed against your ankles as you opened the door slowly, breath still uneven.
as soon as you stepped inside, gisselle sat up in her bed, eyes wide.
“finally!” she whispered sharply, sheets rustling as she motioned for you to come closer. “i was about to sneak out and find you. where on earth have you been?”
you closed the door gently and padded across the floor, not to your bed, but to hers. you dropped to your knees beside it, heart thumping, face flushed.
“i saw him, gisselle.” you whispered, breathless.
she clutched your arm immediately, her eyes even wider now.
“was it him? the prince?” she nearly gasped, then caught herself and slapped a hand over her mouth. “good god, what if someone had seen you?”
“no one did. i ran into him on my way back to the quarters. he came to see me.”
“oh my—” gisselle fell back onto her pillow, clutching it to her chest. “tell me, was it tender? did he call you milady?”
your heart skipped at the memory, his voice so gentle, like you were something delicate in his hands.
“yes..” you whispered, unable to hide the smile tugging at your lips. “he called me milady. and… it was like a dream, gisselle. i don’t know how to explain it. everything just felt… perfect.”
her eyes sparkled with excitement. she leaned in close, voice dropping to a whisper, like she feared the walls might lean in too.
“i can’t believe it. you’re really living a fairytale.” she grinned. “did he… did he kiss you? like..” she paused, eyes flicking around the room. “like a prince would?”
you swallowed hard. the memory was still fresh, still warm. your fingers brushed your lips without thinking.
“he did.” you whispered, shy. “it was soft. gentle. like he thought i might break if he wasn’t careful.” a laugh slipped out, light and breathless. “i never thought i’d feel like that… with him.”
gisselle gasped, her hand flying to her mouth again like she physically couldn’t contain her joy.
“oh my stars..” she breathed. “you’re not just some servant anymore, are you? you’re the prince’s secret. this is madness. pure, beautiful madness.”
you chuckled, glancing toward the soft candlelight flickering on the nightstand. shadows danced across the stone walls, quiet and warm.
“he’s royal, gisselle.” you murmured, your smile faltering. “if anyone finds out… it could mean trouble. for both of us. for everything.”
gisselle’s expression softened. she reached out and took your hand in both of hers, her touch grounding.
“i know.” she said gently. “but it’s his choice, isn’t it? if he wants to be with you… then who’s to say no? he sees you for who you really are. not just some servant girl.”
you bit your lip, her words comforting, but the worry still lingered like a shadow in the back of your mind.
“but i am just a servant.” you whispered. “and he’s the prince. his family, his kingdom… they’ll never accept it.”
gisselle squeezed your hand a little tighter, pulling you closer.
“forget them, y/n.” she said with quiet conviction. “you’ve got a love story worth telling, and no crown or title can take that from you.”
you sighed, the weight in your chest easing a little. just enough. for a moment, everything felt simpler. you closed your eyes, thinking of him. the way his lips had brushed yours.
“i don’t know what will happen.” you murmured. “but for now… i’ll treasure it. i’ll treasure him.”
gisselle leaned back into her pillow, her eyes warm with affection as she looked at you.
“you’re so hopelessly in love.” she teased, voice soft and fond.
“am i?” you smiled, resting your head against the edge of her bed, gazing up at the flickering candlelight.
she giggled, nudging you gently with her foot under the blankets.
“yes” she said. “and somehow, you’re going to make it all work. i just know it.”
you smiled, squeezing her hand once more. her warmth, her words, made everything feel a little less impossible.
“thank you, gisselle..” you whispered. “for everything.”
she smiled softly, voice like a lullaby.
“always.”
ii. lavender hands
the scent of lavender clung to the air, subtle and clean, as you stood in the linen room, carefully folding pressed sheets into perfect thirds. it was quiet, peacefully, so save for the rustle of fabric and the occasional creak of the old wooden shelves that lined the walls. sunlight streamed through the high windows, casting golden beams across the room like soft ribbons of light.
you didn’t hear the door at first. not until the latch clicked gently, then closed again. your head lifted quickly, heart stuttering when your eyes met his.
“your highness—”
“shh.” jungwon grinned, finger to his lips as he stepped inside. “i should scold you for calling me that.”
you stared at him, wide-eyed. “you shouldn’t be here. if anyone were to see—”
“they won’t.” he said simply, voice soft as he approached you with featherlight steps. “you fold these sheets too quickly. i hardly have time to catch a glimpse of you.”
you sighed, turning away to keep your hands busy. “i have work to do.”
“and i am only here to assist, mylady.” he said, lifting the edge of a sheet beside you, mimicking your folds with little success.
you tried not to laugh, but the way he fumbled the corners and stared at the linen as though it had offended him, it tugged a smile from you.
“you’re hopeless.”
jungwon beamed. “and yet, you are the one who’s hopelessly pretty.”
you turned, sheet half-folded in your arms, eyes narrowing with a blush warming your cheeks. “that’s improper.”
“so is sneaking in here to see you.” he murmured, stepping closer. his voice dropped, lower now, just for you. “and yet, i can’t seem to stop myself.”
his fingers brushed yours as he took the linen from your arms, folding it with surprising care this time. his eyes didn’t leave your face.
“every hour i’m away, i wonder where you are. what you’re doing. if you think of me.”
you looked away, heart racing. “you should be with your court. preparing for—”
“a future that bores me endlessly.” he finished for you. “i’d rather be here. with you. in rooms that smell like lavender. watching you tuck corners.”
you turned back to him, brows furrowed. “jungwon…”
“may i hold your hand?” he asked softly, like it was sacred.
you hesitated. then slowly reached for him, your fingers slipping into his like puzzle pieces long separated.
he let out a breathless smile, as if he’d just been handed the world.
“forgive me.” he said, raising your hand to his lips, brushing a kiss across your knuckles. “but i find you so terribly lovely.”
you couldn’t speak. not with the way his eyes looked at you, like you were something precious.
“you make it so difficult to stay away.” he whispered, his hands moving from your waist to gently cup your face.
he took his time, studying your face with such intent that it made your heart race. his thumb traced along your cheekbone, and you caught the small, soft gasp that escaped him when his fingers brushed a lock of hair from your face, tucking it gently behind your ear.
you laughed under your breath, cheeks still warm where his hand had been. “you’re ridiculous.” you whispered, voice barely louder than the fluttering in your chest.
jungwon grinned, the boyish kind, the one that crinkled the corners of his eyes and made your heart stumble. “ridiculously in love with you, perhaps.”
you nudged his shoulder, trying and failing to look stern. “you shouldn’t say things like that.”
“but it’s true.” he leaned against the shelf beside you, hands tucked behind his back, as if resisting the urge to reach for you again. “besides, you blush every time. it’s very rewarding.”
“you’re impossible.” you muttered, turning to the linen stack again, but you smiled, and he saw it.
you pretended to be busy continuing folding, but he stepped closer, his shoulder brushing yours lightly.
“do you ever think..” he said, voice low. “about sneaking away? just for a day. no titles. no expectations. just you and me and the world outside the gates.”
you tilted your head, the idea painting soft, wild colors in your mind. “what would we even do?”
he brightened. “we’d eat sweet bread from the baker’s cart. get our boots dirty in the fields. maybe i’d pretend not to know how to ride a horse just so you’d help me.”
you snorted. “you’re an excellent rider.”
“then maybe I’ll pretend to get lost. that way you’d have to find me.”
“jungwon—”
“and when you do..” he continued with a playful grin. “i’d thank you with a kiss.”
your hands paused, eyes flicking up to meet his. the air between you filled with something golden and warm.
“i think you just want an excuse to kiss me.” you said softly, smile tugging at your lips,
he leaned in a little, lowering his voice like a secret. “i don’t need one.”
your heart flipped. and maybe it was the sunlight or the lavender or the way he was looking at you like the world had slowed down, but you didn’t stop him this time.
his lips brushed yours in the gentlest of kisses, barely there, like a promise.
when you opened your eyes again, he looked dazed, a little stunned with happiness. “i’ve been wanting to do that since the first time i saw you in this room.” he admitted.
you smiled, shy but radiant. “then you should’ve come to fold linens sooner.”
he laughed, full and bright, the sound echoing off the shelves.
“i’m never missing a laundry day again.” he said solemnly.
you giggled, swatting lightly at his chest, but he caught your hand and twirled you in a slow, clumsy circle, right there in the middle of the linen room, amidst half-folded sheets and sunshine.
“what are you doing?” you laughed breathlessly as you stumbled into him.
“practicing for our secret royal ball.” he said with a wink. “it’ll be just the two of us. dress code: aprons and laundry dust.”
you rested your forehead against his, still laughing. “you’re unbelievable.”
“you love it.” he whispered, brushing his nose against yours.
“i might.” you admitted, so softly he nearly missed it.
he stilled.
“say it again..” he murmured, his voice suddenly shy, like he couldn’t believe he’d heard right.
you looked up at him, eyes round and warm. “i might love you.”
his breath hitched. and then he kissed you again, this time giddy and just a little clumsy, like he couldn’t believe you were really there, saying things like that.
you both dissolved into giggles when your teeth bumped. he kissed you again to make up for it. and again. and again.
“you taste like honey.” he whispered against your lips.
“it’s probably the tea from the kitchens.” you replied, cheeks aching from smiling.
“no.” he said, nose brushing yours once more. “it’s just you.”
and there, in a room filled with nothing but fresh linen and sunbeams, jungwon kissed you like the world had finally gotten something right.
iii.
the room was too quiet.
you could feel it in your fingertips as you poured tea into a cup. your movements steady, but not calm. there was no one else in the chamber. no guards, no attendants. just you… and prince ri ki.
ri ki was the second-youngest of the royal line, born into silk and sharp expectations. where jungwon carried the warmth of spring, ri ki was winter, graceful, exact, and difficult to read. his words always seemed carefully chosen, his presence always perfectly composed. he was the kind of boy who wore velvet like armor and wielded silence like a sword.
he sat at the far end of the long table, posture flawless, gaze unreadable. his gloves rested beside his untouched plate, fingers steepled beneath his chin as if the entire room was waiting for his permission to breathe.
you bowed politely. “will there be anything else, your highness?”
“sit.” he said.
you blinked.
“…pardon?”
he nodded to the chair beside him, not unkindly. “i asked you to sit. not as a command, but a courtesy.”
after a heartbeat of hesitation, you obeyed, lowering yourself slowly into the seat. your hands folded in your lap, your breath held.
the silence stretched.
ri ki turned his head, studying you, not cruelly, not unkindly. just… watching.
“you’ve been spending time with my brother.” he said at last.
your pulse stuttered.
you answered carefully. “he sometimes visits the servants’ quarters. he’s friendly.”
ri ki tilted his head just slightly. “you think i’m such a fool?”
you stayed quiet.
“i’ve seen the way he looks at you..” ri ki continued, voice like polished stone. “i’ve also seen the way you look at him.”
your throat tightened. “i never meant—”
he cut you off raising a hand, not accusing, just tired.
“for it to become something real?” he finished, arching a brow. “it already has. and that’s the danger.”
he leaned forward, his gaze sharpening. “i’ve lived in this palace long enough to know the rules, even the unspoken ones. who’s allowed to look at whom. who’s allowed to want. and who’s not.”
you stared at your hands in your lap, fingers curled too tightly.
he sighed. not cold. not even annoyed. just… older than he looked. like someone who had been watching too long from behind a wall of gold.
“i’m not here to threaten you..” he said finally. “i came because jungwon trusts me. and i trust him. but love, especially his, is no small thing.”
you lifted your head.
“he’s always been brave.” ri ki went on. “but lately, i see something more in him. something… reckless. like he’s standing too close to a fire and smiling anyway.”
you breathed. “and you think that’s me?”
“no.” ri ki looked at you calmly. “i think it’s both of you.”
you swallowed, hard. “so what are you going to do?”
“nothing.” he stood, slipping his gloves back on one finger at a time. “at least… not yet.”
you rose with him. “why?”
he paused, adjusting the cuffs of his coat. “because for once, it doesn’t look like a scandal. or a game. it looks like something real. and if it is… you’ll need more than each other to survive it.”
he met your eyes one last time.
“you’ll need to be strong. careful. and above all… silent.” ri ki nodded once. “take care.”
you stood as well, heart still pounding. “your majesty, you’re not going to tell anyone?”
he turned for the door, then paused. “like i said, im not going to do nothing. but be careful.” he said over his shoulder. “not everyone in this palace will be as kind as i am.”
and then he was gone.
you stood there in the quiet, hands trembling slightly, not from fear, but from the truth that had just been laid bare.
because now, you knew someone else had seen the flame.
iv. mylady
the ballroom was packed.
music swelled from the golden chamber like waves crashing against your skull, strings, trumpets, voices, clinking glasses, laughter that didn’t sound happy, not really.
you didn’t belong there. you were just passing through the corridor when you saw him bolt.
jungwon.
a blur of dark blue royal suit, hair combed back too perfectly, expression unreadable as he walked fast, then faster, then ran. no one stopped him. they were too busy bowing.
you didn’t think. you followed.
and now you were here. in the stables. the royal stables, to be exact. where the scent of hay and saddle leather replaced perfume and wine, and moonlight poured in through high wooden slats.
jungwon was sitting on the floor, back against the wall, crown gone, his white undershirt wrinkled beneath layers of discarded uniform.
his knees were drawn up. his elbows rested on them.
he looked…small.
like a boy.
not a prince.
not someone with the weight of the entire court on his back.
“you’re not supposed to be here.” he said softly, not even looking up.
“you’re not either.” you whispered.
he looked up then. his eyes were red. not crying, but close. his jaw tightened when your gaze met his.
“did they send you?”
you sat beside him slowly. your skirts rustled. “no. i just saw you leave.”
he didn’t answer right away.
you watched his hands. they were shaking. he kept flexing his fingers like he couldn’t get the feeling back into them.
you swallowed. “what happened?”
jungwon let out a humorless laugh. “what han’t happened?”
he leaned his head back against the wall and stared at the beams above, silent for a moment.
“my uncle’s drunk..” he started. “my mother’s furious because i didn’t want to dance with the viscount’s daughter. the duke from glenmare asked me what my plan was for international strategy, and i—I’m eighteen.”
you glanced over. he looked so tired.
“i just wanted to breathe..” he muttered. “but then they said i needed to smile more. and shake hands. and bow. and act like i give a damn about any of it.” he turned his head to you suddenly. “and i couldn’t even find you.”
your throat tightened. “me?”
“you always find me when i need air..” he whispered. “but you weren’t there. i couldn’t see you anywhere in that room.”
you were frozen. you never realized he looked for you like that. you thought you were invisible most of the time.
“i was in the west wing..” you said softly. “cleaning.”
he nodded slowly. “of course.” he sighed and leaned forward again, resting his elbows on his knees.
silence again.
but not uncomfortable. just…settled. after a moment, you reached over and touched his hand. he tensed. then relaxed. your fingers stayed there and jungwon stared at them for a second, then intertwined his with yours without looking at you.
his hands were warm now.
“sometimes i wish i wasn’t the prince..” he said quietly. “sometimes i just want to be jungwon.”
you didn’t say anything. instead, you leaned your head on his shoulder. his breath caught. he looked down, stunned at first, but then his whole body seemed to settle. like your touch reset something inside him.
“you feel like peace..” he whispered.
you shut your eyes. he was still holding your hand. your pinky was twitching because of how close he was. you were just a maid. you weren’t supposed to be here. you weren’t supposed to comfort him like this.
but you were. and he was letting you.
“do you ever think about leaving?” he asked. “just…running off? starting over somewhere they don’t know your name?”
you nodded. “all the time.”
jungwon turned to look at you, really look this time. his lashes were long in the moonlight. his eyes soft.
“would you go with me?” he asked.
you blinked. your chest tightened. “what?”
“if i asked..” he said. “would you come with me?”
you wanted to say yes. god, you wanted to scream it.
but instead, you whispered. “is that what you really want?”
he didn’t answer right away. his gaze dropped to your lips. his face was close, so close you could count every texture of his skin.
“no.” he said finally. “what i really want is to kiss you. right now.”
your breath caught.
“but i won’t.” he added. “not unless you want it too.”
your fingers squeezed his, you looked up at him and you nodded. that was all it took.
jungwon didn’t hesitate. his hand came up to your face, gently cupping your cheek like he was scared you’d vanish if he touched you too roughly. his lips found yours, warm, slow at first.
then he kissed you again. and again, deeper this time.
you moved closer without thinking, climbing into his lap, your knees on either side of his thighs, skirts bunched around you. his hands settled on your waist, gripping like he needed something to hold onto.
he pulled back just barely, foreheads pressed together, breathing hard. “tell me if this is too much..” he whispered.
“it’s not..” you said, voice shaky but sure.
his mouth found yours again, more desperate this time. you felt his fingers slide up your back, warm under the fabric of your dress, holding you tighter. your own hands moved up into his hair, finally messy, the way you liked it, the way no one else was allowed to see.
he kissed you like he’d been waiting forever. like he didn’t care about the kingdom or the rules or the titles.
just you. just this.
when his lips left yours, they found your jaw, then your neck, slow, hot kisses that made your breath hitch. you felt dizzy. not from fear, not from nerves. from how real it all felt.
his hands roamed, careful but curious, tracing the curve of your waist, the dip of your spine, the bare skin where your dress had slipped just slightly off one shoulder. you gasped quietly when he kissed there, slow and lingering.
you rolled your hips slightly, testing the tension between you. he groaned, quiet, breathy, right against your collarbone, and you felt it, the proof of his want pressing up into you through layers that suddenly felt like too much.
“milady..” he muttered, voice low and rough. “are you.. sure about this?”
you nodded, hands tugging at the buttons of his shirt.
jungwon let out a short breath that could’ve been a laugh, but he was too busy dragging his mouth down your throat, kissing a slow path over your skin. your fingers finally got the last button undone, revealing more of his chest, pale, warm, already flushed. he looked up at you as your hands explored him, watching your face like every move you made was the answer to something he’d been aching to know.
“are you quite certain?” he asked again, one hand slipping up your thigh, pushing your skirts higher. l.
you nodded, breath catching where your fingers brushed his chest. “yes… are you?”
a flicker of colour bloomed on his cheeks. “i’ve never… not once. not with anyone.”
your eyes met his, wide and surprised. “nor have i.”
for a moment, neither of you moved.
the stillness between you felt reverent, sacred. not rushed, not impulsive, just two souls baring themselves.
jungwon exhaled shakily, his thumb brushing your cheek. “then we take our time..” he murmured. “we learn… together.”
your lips curved into the smallest smile. “alright.”
his kiss came slowly, deliberately, with every ounce of care he could give. his lips ghosted over yours as though you were something fragile, something royal in your own right. your hands slipped into his hair, anchoring yourself to him as the warmth of his body pressed against yours.
you helped him undo his pants, fumbling a little with the fabric, both of you shaky and flushed. by then he was free, hard and flushed and already throbbing against your thigh. your underwear came off too, discarded somewhere behind you, forgotten in the soft hay.
“i’ve no notion what i’m doing, mylady.” he admitted softly, flushed and breathless.
“nor i…” you whispered back, a nervous laugh escaping. “but i trust you.”
“may i…?” he asked, voice catching.
you nodded. “slowly.”
and he did. you took him in carefully, inch by inch, both of you holding your breath. it stretched and burned a little, but it wasn’t bad.
his fingers gripped your hips as though anchoring himself. “you’re alright?”
“yes.” you breathed. “just… give me a moment.”
“say the word, and i’ll stop.” he whispered.
but instead, you kissed him.
your bodies moved in soft rhythm, unsure but willing, each motion a question answered with breath and touch. his head rested against your shoulder, his voice a quiet sound of wonder each time you rocked into him.
there was no bed. no privacy. just the hay, the moonlight, and the way he held you like this moment might break him.
“sweet mercy...” he groaned, head tipping back against the stable wall.
you couldn’t think. could barely breathe. all you could do was move, slow at first, easing yourself into the stretch, the fullness. his hands gripped your hips, holding you like he didn’t want to let go.
“mylady, look at me.” he whispered.
and when you did his eyes burned into yours.
“jungwon..”
you moved together, slow, grinding, chasing the edge like it was the only thing that mattered. each roll of your hips dragged a whimper from your throat and a quiet curse from his. he kissed you through it, messy, desperate, open-mouthed kisses as your bodies met again and again.
you felt him throb inside you, knew he was close.
“mylady..” he begged.
you came together quietly, holding each other close, his breath mixing with yours. and a moment later, you followed, falling apart against him, your face buried in his shoulder.
neither of you moved for a long time. you both stayed there, tangled in silence.
his breathing was still uneven, lips slightly parted as he buried his face in your hair. one of his hands lay over your back, fingers twitching gently.
your heart thudded slow but steady, matching his. it felt like the world had paused around you. no court. no crown. just sweat-slick skin, shallow breaths, and the press of two people who shouldn’t have had this, but did.
you exhaled first. and then, softly, barely audible, you speak. “ri ki knows about us.”
jungwon didn’t move. he blinked once. then again.
slowly, he pulled back just enough to look at you. his eyes were puffy but his brows drew together with concern.
“…what?” he whispered.
you swallowed. “your brother knows about this.”
jungwon was quiet. his expression didn’t twist into panic, he just leaned his head back against the wooden beam behind him, staring at the ceiling, his chest rising and falling.
“don’t worry about him.” he murmured. “he wouldn’t tell anyone.”
you nodded slowly, fingers still resting lightly on his chest. “i know. but he’s also loyal. to the crown.”
jungwon looked back at you. there was something unreadable in his eyes now. something sharp beneath the softness. “he’s loyal to me.”
you held his gaze. “are you sure that’s enough?”
he didn’t answer right away. outside, a horse shuffled in its stall. the night breeze creeping through the cracks in the stable walls.
jungwon reached for your hand again, intertwining your fingers.
“i’ll protect us..” he said quietly. “i swear it.”
and you believed him.
v.
the morning sun had barely crested the hills when jungwon stepped onto the practice grounds.
his boots sank slightly into the soft earth, dew still clinging to the grass. his tunic stuck to his back with sweat, already, though it was barely past dawn and the guards who usually assisted him were dismissed.
jungwon exhaled through gritted teeth, blade locked against ri ki’s. both brothers stood at the center of the courtyard, boots planted firm on cobblestone slick with dew.
“you’ve gone soft.” ri ki muttered, pushing back with a smirk.
jungwon twisted his wrist, parried, and stepped aside. “i’ve not.” he grunted. “you’re just insufferable this early.”
“speak for yourself, your highness.”
their swords clashed again, fast now, the rhythm sharp, prince to prince, brother to brother.
jungwon’s movements were aggressive. sharp turns. no hesitation. each strike carried more than just training, it carried frustration.
“you’re distracted.” ri ki said after another parry. “again.”
“and you’re irritating.” jungwon bit, swinging low. ri ki dodged, barely.
“not the first to say so.” they paused, swords crossed, faces close. ri ki studied him. “it’s her, isn’t it?”
jungwon’s jaw tightened. “say it again and i’ll knock your teeth out.”
ri ki lowered his sword.
“you truly believe you’ll keep her hidden forever?” he asked, more serious now. “you’ve always been daft when it comes to consequence, but this, this is foolish beyond reason.”
jungwon stepped back, sword still in hand.
“you think i do not know that?” he snapped. “you think i do not wake with dread in my gut each morn, wondering if mother’s already caught wind?”
“then why continue?”
jungwon looked away, silent for a moment. “because she’s the only thing that feels… honest.”
riki scoffed lightly. “how poetic. write her a sonnet then, not an obituary.”
jungwon turned to him sharply.
ri ki’s tone darkened. “she could die.” he said bluntly. “you know what mother is. you know what she’s done. you’ve seen it.”
a silence felt and jungwon’s knuckles were white around the hilt of his sword. he was breathing hard, but not from the drills.
he stared down at the sword.
ri ki continued, his tone cold. “if word of this reaches her, if she senses even a breath of rebellion, she will not speak of it. she will act.”
jungwon’s jaw clenched. “she would not dare harm her.”
ri ki’s gaze did not waver. “she would. and has. you are heir, jungwon. you were not raised to love. you were bred to rule.”
he felt it then. the doubt.
for the first time.
like rot in his lungs.
he’d always believed he could protect you. that if he loved hard enough, held you tight enough, it would be enough.
but what if it wasn’t?
what if he was dragging you into a fire, blindfolded and barefoot?
what if loving you was a death sentence?
ri ki sighed. “mother wants you ready for tomorrow’s.”
jungwon turned his head. “what is it now?”
“you leave by carriage this afternoon. the royal instructors have been summoned. they are to accompany you by carriage through the northern route.”
jungwon looked up sharply. “i was not told.”
“you’re to meet the princess. she’ll be seated beside you during supper.” ri ki said flatly.
jungwon’s heart sank.
“it begins.” ri ki added. “whether you like it or not.”
he gave jungwon a long look before he left.
vi.
the hour was far past decent.
moonlight stretched pale across the marble floors, and the long hall you crossed seemed to echo with silence. torches flickered low in their sconces, their flames casting golden shadows that danced across your path.
your skirts whispered with each step, arms tired from scrubbing, apron dusted with ash from the hearth. your hands were smudged faintly with soot, apron crumpled, hair tucked back loosely.
you moved quietly through the corridor, long and dimly lit, you just wanted to reach your chambers. you rubbed your arms absently, your shoulders aching. only a few more steps until a hand caught your waist.
you startled, breath caught in your throat, but before you could speak, a second hand came around, pressing gently over your mouth.
your back was against the wall in an instant.
warm breath touched your ear.
“hush.” the voice was low, familiar. your eyes widened as jungwon stepped into view.
his tunic was open slightly at the throat, the royal crest gleaming faint beneath the fabric. his hair was slightly tousled, as though he’d been running fingers through it all evening. he said nothing at first. just looked at you.
you blinked at him. “you scared me.”
“forgive me.” he murmured, brows furrowed as he stepped closer. “i did not intend to, i only… gods, i could not wait.”
your back pressed further into the stone as he closed the distance, eyes still searching his.
he looked tired.
“i’ll be leaving tomorrow.”
you straightened. “leaving?”
he nodded once. “just for a few days.” he reassured, his voice quiet in the empty corridor. his fingers curled gently at your waist. “nothing dangerous. just business. royal duties.”
you looked up at him, trying to read past the calm in his tone.
he was dressed simpler than usual, his dark tunic a bit wrinkled from rushing, the crest at his collar half-buttoned, and his hair messier than you’d ever seen it. like he’d run his hands through it a dozen times.
“will you miss me?” he asked, his head tilting slightly.
you shrugged, arms crossed loosely. “a little.”
he huffed a laugh. “liar.”
his arms came around you then, slow, deliberate, like he wasn’t sure you’d allow it. like he needed to be sure.
but you didn’t move away.
you let him hold you.
his arms slipped further around you then, drawing you in. slower this time, gentler. his head dropped to your shoulder, warm breath brushing your skin.
you didn’t move away.
his hold tightened a little, just enough to pull you closer. he didn’t speak right away, just stayed like that, forehead against your neck, fingers curling at your lower back.
“you’re tense.” you said quietly, hand brushing through his hair.
he hummed low in response, then leaned back just slightly to look at you. his eyes searched your face, soft, a bit heavy-lidded.
“am i?” he said with a small smirk.
you raised an eyebrow. “you look like you haven’t slept.”
“maybe i haven’t.”
his gaze flicked to your lips.
you felt your breath catch, just barely, and when he leaned in, reflexively you turned your face, shy, cheeks warming before you could stop it. not out of rejection, but out of memory. of that night. of how close you had been. how bare.
he noticed.
“ah..” he said under his breath, a small, knowing sound.
his hand simply moved to the back of your neck, thumb gently rubbing along your skin as his forehead came to rest against yours.
“you’re shy now?” he whispered, teasing.
you rolled your eyes, cheeks warm, eyes refusing to meet his.
jungwon hummed, gaze dropping to your lips, and he leaned closer. murmuring near your ear. “you weren’t shy last time. you—”
“don’t say it.”
“you begged, dove.”
“jungwon!”
he burst into quiet laughter, pulling you in with both arms now, clearly too entertained.
“you’re never seeing me off again.” you grumbled into his shoulder.
he smiled against your hair.
“too late. i’m already leaving with a memory i’ll take to my grave.”
you pulled back just enough to glare at him, only for him to steal that kiss after all, quick and soft, catching you off guard.
your breath caught and he smiled smugly.
“miss me properly, yeah?”
vii. just for a minute.
the days moved on like they always did.
your mornings began early, before the bells rang. you helped prep the main halls, swept ash from the fireplaces, and kept the west wing windows polished so the steward wouldn’t complain.
gisselle was the one who kept you sane.
she cornered you in the linen room two days after his departure, arms full of folded sheets and suspicion in her eyes.
“you’re quieter.” she said bluntly, dropping the stack on the shelf.
you blinked. “i’m tired.”
“tired, huh?” she echoed, clearly unimpressed. “you’re always tired. this is different.”
you didn’t answer, and she didn’t press. just gave you a look and passed you a basket of fresh towels.
“well, whatever’s keeping you up, tell it to let you sleep. you look like a sad candle.”
“a sad candle?”
“yes. all dim and droopy. it’s tragic.”
you huffed a laugh despite yourself.
afternoons were filled with errands, refilling water jugs, delivering notes between staff, helping the kitchen girls carry bread loaves up to the great hall.
nights were quiet.
gisselle snuck you extra biscuits from the kitchen. you returned her hairpins when she left them scattered across the vanity table. and sometimes you’d crawl into her bed with a sigh and ask if they feed him properly out there. gisselle could only said that he was a prince. he’ll survive.
one week passed. then another.
you did your duties. you kept your head down. you kept that folded parchment beneath your pillow. untouched.
no letters came. but you kept waking before the sun. just in case.
you found yourself, as always, in the same places. tidying the east wing, sweeping the hallways, delivering messages to the royal chambers. and yet, you carried on.
then, one evening as you were passing by the library, before you could even turn, hands were at your waist, lifting you from your thoughts and pulling you.
you barely had time to process it.
“what—jungwon?” you managed, though his name came out more like a question, a gasp, and you couldn’t quite place the confusion or the shock, both because you hadn’t expected him to be back and because, honestly, you hadn’t heard a thing.
he didn’t immediately speak, though his presence alone was enough to unsettle you. you finally turned your head to face him, your eyes searching his.
“when did you return?” you whispered, a bit breathless from the unexpected turn of events.
jungwon’s eyes flicked to yours, and for a moment, there was something unreadable in them. the usual spark was gone, replaced with something deeper, unease, maybe?
“this morning.” he said, his voice quieter than usual. he took a small step back, but his hands never left your waist.
you frowned, noticing the way his brows were furrowed, the tension in his jaw. he was acting different, too still, too careful with every movement.
“you seem…” you trailed off, trying to find the right words. “what’s wrong?”
he gave a half-smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “nothing’s wrong.”
but it didn’t sound convincing.
you tilted your head slightly, studying him, feeling the quiet pull between you as he remained unusually distant.
you watched him carefully, he couldn’t keep his gaze on you. instead, his eyes flicked around, scanning the corridor.
finally, after a few moments of silence, he met your eyes again, this time with a softer look.
“i missed you.” he said simply, already pulling you by the hand, into the familiar hush of the library.
it was quiet. lit only by candles. he let go of your hand then, and you rubbed your wrist out of habit, though it wasn’t sore. just warm. still tingling.
you turned away first, pretending to examine the nearest shelf. “you know i’m still working.”
“then consider this… an unauthorized break.”
you glanced over your shoulder. “what if someone finds us?”
he raised a brow. “then we’ll lie. you were dusting books, and i was brushing up on agriculture.”
“you hate agriculture.”
“exactly. no one would believe it. they’ll leave us alone.”
you snorted, crossing your arms and leaning back against the railing of the spiral staircase. “you’re impossible.”
but your heart was already thudding. you hated the way it did that, loud and reckless, whenever he looked at you the way he was looking at you now.
god how much you’ve missed him.
“you like it here.” he said suddenly.
your eyes flicked to his. “the library?”
he took a step closer, hands tucked behind his back. “you always slow down when you walk past. i’ve noticed.”
“…maybe.” you shrugged, turning back to the shelves. “it’s peaceful.”
jungwon moved slowly then, careful, like he was testing the weight of every step. the candlelight hit the side of his face, softening the sharp lines. making his eyes look warmer than you remembered.
“you looked absolutely beautiful, mylady.”
you shake you head. “i looked completely horrendous.”
his hand reached up, brushing a loose strand of hair away from your cheek. gentle. slow.
“i mean every word when i speak to you.” he said.
you looked away, but he didn’t let you. his hand was careful, lifting your chin just slightly until your gaze met his again.
your lips parted. the breath caught in your throat. and then, just as suddenly, he stepped back. turned away. his shoulders shifted as he exhaled. he moved to one of the velvet armchairs near the tall window and sat down without another word.
“come here.” he said quietly, patting the armrest beside him.
“jungwon…” you hesitated.
“just for a minute.”
you sighed but walked over anyway, sitting beside him. your knees bumped lightly.
it was quiet again. the kind of quiet that felt private. heavy.
he looked at you, something thoughtful in his expression. something almost… hesitant. but he didn’t say anything. he didn’t say what he came here to say.
instead, his gaze fell on the shelves again. “read something to me.”
you blinked. “what?”
“pick anything. i want to hear your voice.”
you gave him a strange look, but reached for a nearby book anyway. you flipped through the yellowed pages until you found something legible and started reading, something about a royal banquet that had ended with someone’s wig catching fire.
he laughed and you glanced at him, smiling without thinking. you didn’t even notice how close his hand had gotten until your fingers brushed against his.
his fingers were long, soft, a little cold. yours were rougher, calloused from cleaning floors and silverware.
he liked your hands. he noticed they always shook a little when you were around him, and he’d never say it out loud, but it made his chest feel warm in a way that almost scared him.
you didn’t dress like the other girls he saw in the ballroom. no jewels, no silks. you wore a faded apron, scuffed shoes, sleeves rolled to your elbows. but somehow, you looked more beautiful to him than all of them combined.
and tonight, as you stood beside him under the library chandelier, face lit softly in candlelight, he couldn’t stop staring.
“why’re you looking at me like that.” you muttered, trying to sound annoyed.
“you’ve a smudge on your cheek.” he said, his hand reaching up your cheek to clean it. and when he did you looked away first, flustered.
he always looked at you like that, like you were something he wasn’t supposed to want, but did anyway.
it was confusing. it made your stomach twist in ways you didn’t understand.
jungwon stepped away slowly, pretending to inspect the books. his hair was slightly messy, soft brown strands falling into his eyes. he was always clean-cut, always neat in public. but in these stolen moments, he looked real.
less like a prince.
you stood in place for a moment, heart hammering, unsure of what to do with the space he’d left behind. the room still felt like it belonged to him, even when he wasn’t touching you.
you turned back to the book, pretending to read. you weren’t following the words. you were listening to him move behind you. the quiet creak of the floorboards under his boots. the way he breathed a little slower now.
“i didn’t think you’d be back so soon.” you murmured.
“neither did i.”
you glanced at him over your shoulder. he wasn’t looking at you, just tracing the spine of a dusty volume like it held something important. like if he focused hard enough, it would tell him what to say.
“did something happen?” you asked, voice low.
he paused. only for a second. but you noticed.
“no.” he said simply. “just… plans changed.”
you tilted your head, confused. “you’re usually kept longer when you travel with the council.”
jungwon let out a breath that almost sounded like a laugh, but not a real one. more like something tired.
“turns out, not everything goes according to plan.”
you nodded slowly, still watching him. his voice was steady, but something in it felt… off. and he still wasn’t meeting your eyes.
you didn’t ask more. you should’ve. but you didn’t. instead, you took a step toward him.
“well… i’m glad you’re here.” you said and grab his hands with a smile across your face.
and that’s when he looked at you. fully. his eyes soft but guarded, like he was memorizing something.
“don’t say that.” he murmured.
you blinked. “why not?”
he didn’t answer at first. just glanced down at your hands joined like he hadn’t meant for that to happen.
but he didn’t let go.
“you make it harder.” he said, almost like he didn’t mean to say it out loud.
you frowned.
he shook his head. “forget it.”
you opened your mouth to ask again, but then he kissed you. thumb brushing the edge of your jaw.
“you talk too much, mylady.” he said softly, teasing, even if his voice sounded far away.
“that’s new.” you muttered, trying not to sound breathless.
he smiled faintly. “you’ve always talked too much.”
you narrowed your eyes at him. “you’re so strange lately.”
“am i?” he murmured, like he wasn’t even listening anymore.
you paused, leaning your forehead lightly against his shoulder. “you sure everything’s alright?”
his hand slid gently down your spine.
“yeah.”
he didn’t look at you when he said it. but his arms stayed around you like he didn’t trust himself to let go.
you didn’t ask again.
and he didn’t say anything else. just held you because maybe he wouldn’t get to again.
viii. the promise that wasn’t for me
the days passed, but jungwon was quieter than usual. he didn’t come around like before, didn’t seek you out like he did in the library that night. you heard his footsteps less often, his voice rarely reached your ears. sometimes, when you passed the great hall or the council chambers, you caught glimpses of him in the distance, always alone, always serious.
you kept yourself busy, going about your chores like always, sweeping floors, polishing silver, and running errands for the steward. it was easier to focus on work when your mind was crowded with questions you didn’t want to ask.
gisselle noticed, of course. she teased you less and watched you more, like she was waiting for you to say something anything about jungwon’s sudden silence.
you wanted to say something. you wanted to ask why he came back only to disappear again, why his eyes looked tired and distant the last time you saw him. but you didn’t have the words. maybe he didn’t either.
sometimes, when the palace was quiet and the sun was low, you found yourself standing near the library, hoping to catch a glimpse of him. but he never appeared. the empty space beside you where he used to stand felt heavier than any silence.
tho this morning the palace was louder than usual.
you had barely tied your apron when the head maid grabbed your arm and thrust a tray of covered dishes into your hands.
“to the golden parlour. now. her majesty is having a private breakfast with a guest.”
“a guest?” you asked, adjusting your grip on the tray. “shall i prepare tea, or—”
“princess navina of esthrene.” she cut in. “do not speak unless spoken to. and mind your posture.”
you offered a tight nod and made your way down the corridor, trying not to roll your eyes.
another one.
prince jungwon had been “introduced” to more noble daughters than you could count. you’d seen dozens. each one laced in foreign perfumes and draped in their kingdom’s finest silk. each one trying, and failing, to draw a smile from him.
jungwon never smiled at them.
you balanced the tray and made your way to the parlour. your chest felt calm. you had nothing to worry about.
he was yours.
even if no one knew it.
the doors to the golden parlour opened with a soft click, and you stepped inside, careful not to let the tray wobble.
the room was warm with gold accents, sunlight filtering through gauzy curtains. the queen sat at the head of the gilded table, elegance in every movement. across from her, a young woman, presumably princess navina, adorned in seafoam silks and delicate pearls. her poise was flawless. she looked composed. polished. untouched.
but it was jungwon who made your breath falter.
he sat beside her. straight-backed in his ceremonial robe, the one with black and gold threading reserved for national announcements or courtships.
when he saw you enter, tray in hand, something shifted. his eyes widened just slightly, lips parting as though caught mid-thought. he hadn’t expected you. not here. not now. and definitely not like this.
he looked down, then back up, expression unreadable again, face settling into calm.
but he wasn’t calm.
you bowed low, eyes on the floor. “breakfast is served, your majesties.”
“set it down.” the queen said evenly.
you obeyed, fingers steady, until you reached him. you didn’t look at him. but you felt him. he didn’t speak. didn’t move. but his eyes found yours. not cold, not warm. something in between. something stuck.
then, as if remembering where he was, who he was, he looked away.
you quickly stepped back to your post. hands clasped behind your back with posture perfect.
“well princess navina” the queen began. “we’re grateful your family agreed to the shortened engagement. a summer ceremony will be most fitting.”
your stomach dropped.
“indeed, your majesty.” navina answered softly. “my mother preferred a spring celebration, but i insisted. i would rather stand beside my husband from the beginning of his reign.”
jungwon didn’t say a word.
“the royal tailor arrives tomorrow.” the queen continued. “the wedding colours shall be gold and seafoam. the announcement will go out by week’s end.”
your heart fell to the ground before the silver tray.
because yes, you dropped it and the porcelain dishes shattered on the marble floor.
the entire room went silent.
you dropped to a bow without thinking, heart thudding against your ribs. “f-forgive me, your majesty.“
the queen didn’t answer right away.
you stayed in position, knees pressed to the floor, hands trembling slightly. the sound of the broken cup still echoed in your ears. it was foolish. you knew better. you were trained better.
but you hadn’t expected that.
you hadn’t expected her.
princess navina sat gracefully at the table, one gloved hand resting in her lap, the other holding a silver spoon just above her untouched plate. she didn’t flinch. didn’t look startled or annoyed. only concerned, the type of calm concern taught in finishing schools and royal drawing rooms.
she was beautiful, of course she was.
her dark hair was swept back into an intricate twist, not a strand out of place. her eyes, soft and almond-shaped, were framed with kohl and intelligence. her dress shimmered faintly with seafoam thread, and the pearl comb in her hair caught the light whenever she moved.
she looked like she belonged there.
next to him.
and that made your stomach twist.
you heard the queen shift in her seat. “get it cleaned.” she said sharply. “then leave us.”
you bowed lower. “yes, your majesty.”
you scrambled to gather the broken porcelain, careful not to cut your palms. jungwon didn’t move. not a muscle. but you felt his eyes on you.
you didn’t look up.
you couldn’t.
as you stood, you caught a glimpse of princess navina watching you. her expression unreadable. curious, maybe. or amused. or nothing at all.
you turned and walked out, heart pounding, cheeks burning, pieces of porcelain rattling on the tray.
you hadn’t cried.
not yet.
but gods, your eyes stung.
you set the tray down in the scullery with shaking hands. no one was there and the silence pressed in around you like a second skin. you stared at the shards, white and delicate, now ruined. like something else you couldn’t name.
you pressed your palms flat to the counter, trying to steady your breath. your reflection in the tarnished silver tray stared back, eyes red-rimmed and wide, lips parted like you might speak if you only had the strength.
you didn’t see jungwon for the rest of the day.
you kept your head down, kept busy, scrubbed the kitchens until your fingers ached. you avoided the golden parlour. you avoided everyone.
even gisselle, who cornered you by the laundry with furrowed brows and folded arms.
“you’re not made of stone.” she said, not unkindly. “you can talk to me, you know.”
but you couldn’t.
that night you lay on your straw mattress, the thin blanket barely keeping the chill away. the quiet was comforting — except for the absence of giselle, who was supposed to be nearby. she had left a few minutes ago saying she needed a bath before bed, wanting to wash away the day’s dirt and tension.
then your door creaked open and you saw him. soaked in rain, his cloak dripping onto your stone floor and hair flat against his forehead. you sat up fast, heart leaping,
your breath caught in your throat. “you can’t be here. someone will—”
“why?” he stepped fully inside, shutting the door behind him. “because if anyone finds out i’m marrying someone else, they’ll know i’ve been sneaking into a maid’s room at night for months?”
“you lied to me.”
“i didn’t lie.”
“you didn’t tell me.” you snapped, rising to your feet.
“i was going to tell you.”
“when?” your voice cracked, raw. “when, jungwon?”
“i didn’t think they’d agree to the shortened engagement.” he rushed out. “it was supposed to be discussed, just discussed. i was going to tell you, but not like this—”
“so you were just going to keep lying to me.”
“i wasn’t lying!” he said, louder now. “i wasn’t ready.”
“you weren’t ready.” you echoed bitterly.
“i was trying to protect you.”
you stared at him. “by marrying another woman?”
“i’m not choosing her. you know that. you think i’d stand at an altar with someone else, knowing what we have?” his voice sounded tired. defeated.
“you already are.” you whispered, voice breaking. “you sat beside her today. you let them plan your wedding.”
“and what would you have me do?” his voice rose. “declare my love for a servant before the entire court? bring scandal to your name? put a target on your back?”
“you already have.”
his face crumpled. “y/n…”
you looked away, blinking hard, throat burning. your voice came quieter this time. “you should go.”
“please don’t do this.” he stepped closer but you backed away quickly.
“go.” you whispered and crossed your arms, not to defend yourself, but to keep from shaking.
jungwon stood in the middle of the room like a storm himself, unwelcome, uninvited, and yet impossible to look away from.
he didn’t move.
he pressed a hand to his face, dragging it down slowly, as if trying to wipe the weight of it all away. “i thought i could buy us time. i thought—i thought if i kept things quiet, i could figure it out without hurting you.”
you turned away, gripping the edge of the small wooden table near your bed, trying to steady yourself. “you should go before giselle comes back.”
he stayed where he was.
“jungwon..” you said again, softer now, tired. “please.”
he looked at you like he was memorizing you, the distance between you was breaking something inside him. he opened his mouth, then shut it. and then, finally, he nodded.
“i’ll fix this.”
you didn’t answer.
you didn’t look back when the door creaked open again. or when it shut behind him.
your knees gave out the second the door shut behind him.
you dropped to the floor, hard, hands hitting the stone as you caught yourself. and then it all crashed in.
you cried.
you cried like it hurt to breathe, like the ache in your chest might never leave. the tears came hot and fast, spilling down your cheeks, dripping onto the floor. sobs tore through you, quiet but wrecking, the kind that left your whole body trembling.
because you loved him.
you pressed your forehead to the floor, eyes squeezed shut, wishing the stone would swallow you whole-wishing you could go back to before, when it was just you and him and a library full of stolen moments.
but those moments were gone.
ix.
the days following were torment. not just for him, but for you too.
the palace didn’t sleep. there were whispers in every hallway, servants sprinting across stone floors with velvet fabrics, golden plates, and endless flowers. everyone preparing for the arrival of the royal guests.
and you?
you kept your head down, hands busy, ears deaf. or at least, you tried. but every time someone said lady navina, it felt like someone dug their fingers into your chest and twisted.
you spoke only when spoken to.
and when you did, you called him, my lord.
the first time it left your lips, the pen slipped from his hand like it had burned him.
now jungwon was looking for you all over the palace.
in the marble corridors, in the garden, in the library where you used to sort the books by color just because he said he liked it like that.
but you were no longer in any of those places.
you had asked to be transferred to the kitchen.
away from the east wing.
away from him.
and still, jungwon kept looking for you.
through the hallways.
through the art gallery.
he even asked about you in the laundry room.
but you ignored him. more firmly each time.
you were never under any illusion, it was never meant to last. you knew he would come. and so he did. three days later, the doors burst open with such force, the very knives upon the table trembled in their place.
the kitchen fell still. not a word, not a breath.
even the head chef, midway through stirring, froze in silence. only the soup dared to continue its boil—blissfully.
“leave. all of you.” jungwon’s voice rang out—clear. commanding. no one moved at first. until he lifted his gaze. “i said leave. now.”
the cook dropped her knife. the helpers rushed to remove their aprons. one by one, they left, confused. you did the same. left the board, turned toward the back door, but his voice reached you before you crossed it.
“not you.”
you halted. and slowly, so slowly, you turned to face him. he came closer, closing the door behind him.
“my lord.” you said, with a curt nod. “if you’ll excuse me—“
“is that it?” he bit out, stepping forward. “are you truly going to keep pretending you don’t know me? that you don’t know what’s between us?”
“i’m not pretending anything, my lord.” the coldness in your voice was worse than any slap.
“don’t call me that. not you, for god’s sake.”
“but that’s what you are now. my lord.”
“no!” he took a step closer, his voice breaking with anger. “not after everything. not after the way you looked at me. not after those nights we spent talking about the world beyond these walls, dreaming of something more than
“that was before your engaged.”
his eyes softened for a second, like your coldness tore him apart. he walked toward you, slower this time, like he was unsure, like every step hurt.
“don’t look at me like that. not you.” he whispered.
“how am i supposed to look at you?” you asked, not with anger, just resignation. “like nothing happened? jungwon, you knew this was going to happen. you chose it.”
“they chose it for me.”
“but you accepted it. and i don’t blame you. you’re the prince. you have a duty.” your voice cracked a little, but you kept going. “i already knew my place. i’m just… a mistake in your story.”
“you were never a mistake!”
“but it seems like one. doesn’t it?”
he breathed heavily. you remained unmoved.
“you don’t understand.” he murmured, turning away and running a hand through his hair. “you don’t understand how hard it’s been to pretend i don’t care about you. how i ache every time i see you and can’t touch you. you don’t understand what it’s like to smile at a woman i never chose while thinking about the scent of your lavender-covered hands.”
you didn’t cry. you wouldn’t give him that.
“i love you..”he let out, almost a desperate secret. “don’t you get it? i’d do anything to give you the truth back, to turn back time. tell me you still believe me.”
“believing you isn’t the problem, jungwon.”
you looked him straight in the eyes, finally.
“the problem is that none of this matters anymore. because you have a duty. a kingdom. a crown. and i’m just a stone in the path to all that.”
“you’re not.”
“yes, i am. and you know it.”
jungwon lowered his gaze. he looked tired. his jaw was tight, eyebrows drawn like he’d been clenching them all day. but it was his eyes. red, a little swollen, like he hadn’t slept right in days. they kept flicking from your face to the floor, like he couldn’t decide where to settle.
“i didn’t expect to stay with you. i’m not that naive.” you added. “but i did expect you to be honest with me. after everything… i thought at least that much, you owed me.”
he closed his eyes, like your words were blades.
“i tried..” he murmured. “i tried to find a way out. i thought that if i postponed the announcement, if i delayed the ceremony… i could find you, explain everything myself. but things moved faster than i imagined.”
“it wasn’t your duty to delay it.” you said softly, eyes down. “your duty was to become king. i was just the mistake you made along the way.”
that broke him. you knew it because he stepped back, like he needed space to breathe.
“you weren’t a mistake.” he said again, firm, with a mix of pain and anger. “don’t say that. you were… the only real thing.”
jungwon looked at you as if hoping you’d interrupt him, say something, anything, but you just stayed silent. the kitchen was heavy with tension.
“say something. anything.” he pleaded, voice barely louder than a whisper.
“what do you want me to say?” you finally asked, still not looking at him. “that i understand you? because i do. that i forgive you? i do that too. but none of it changes what you are now.”
“you talk to me like i betrayed you on purpose.”
“i don’t blame you, jungwon.” you repeated calmly, but it was the kind of calm that only hides exhaustion. “i really don’t. i just… didn’t expect to find out while serving bread and tea.
jungwon shut his eyes tightly. “it hurts when you talk to me like this.”
“and you think it doesn’t hurt me?” you said, finally looking at him, eyes wet but no tears falling. “you were the only thing that didn’t make me feel invisible in this place.”
he stepped toward you again, desperate.
“i don’t want this to end like this. i don’t want you and me to…” his voice broke.
“but it already ended, jungwon.” you interrupted. “it ended the moment you signed the papers. the moment you swore loyalty to someone else.”
he looked at you with a mix of sorrow and fury. not at you, but at himself. for not protecting you. for losing you. for not having the courage to break from what was expected of him.
“if i could go back…”
“but you can’t.” you said, and this time you smiled, a sad resigned smile. “this was your destiny. i was just a pause in the middle of your duty.”
the silence stretched.
“and still, i love you.” he murmured.
that made you tremble. you lowered your gaze. you didn’t want to hear that. not now. not when you had already forced yourself to let him go.
“don’t say that to me, jungwon.” you whispered.
he stared at you for a long time. too long. and for a second, just a second, you wondered if he might say screw it. if he might reach for your hand. pull you close. risk it all.
but he didn’t.
he just looked down. his shoulders dropped a little. then he nodded, once.
“i’m sorry.” he said quietly.
you didn’t answer.
and this time, when he turned to leave, you didn’t stop him. you didn’t even look.
and maybe that’s what hurt most.
x. the bells said I died
the palace glowed as if it were already celebrating a fairytale you never asked to be part of. white flowers climbed the windows, golden velvet curtains hung from every arch, and a thousand scented candles waited to be lit once night fell. the grand ball in honor of prince jungwon’s engagement to lady navina was just hours away.
and you… you walked through it all as if you were just another piece of furniture. invisible. as if you hadn’t woken up before dawn for months to prepare the tea he always said he preferred when no one else was paying attention. as if you hadn’t memorized the sound of his breathing while pretending you were the only one in love in silence.
it was the day before the royal ball. the celebration in honor of the prince’s engagement to lady navina was already filling the palace with decorations. the halls overflowed with white flowers and golden ribbons, and every servant was rushing from one end to the other with trays, fabrics, crowns of leaves, while you just… walked through it all with your head down, pretending it didn’t affect you.
“more to the center, dear, that table must be perfect. the princess wants everything to look flawless.” ordered one of the ladies-in-waiting, adjusting her headpiece with a handheld mirror.
you were about to answer, but gisselle ran up to you, breathless.
“prince jungwon…” she said in a hushed tone, as if afraid someone else might hear. “he hasn’t gotten out of bed. the physician was called. they say he has a fever.”
you froze. “how bad is it?”
“i don’t know. no one is allowed near him. his mother isn’t letting anyone in except for her most trusted staff.” she lowered her voice again. “but he hasn’t eaten. hasn’t spoken. it’s been all day.”
“and navina?”
“she hasn’t even gone to see him. she’s too busy choosing the flowers for the banquet.”
you walked away without a word.
that night, as the sun finally disappeared behind the palace towers, you sat in your chambers pretending to sew. the thread slipped from your fingers more than once, and your stitches were uneven—your mind too loud, too far from the needle in your hand. you hadn’t truly been focusing, not for hours, but you kept your posture straight, lips pressed into a line, like you’d been taught.
across the room, giselle slept curled beneath a soft wool blanket. her back rose and fell in steady rhythm, face turned toward the window.
the only light came from a single candle on your desk. shadows danced along the walls, and every creak of the old stone outside felt louder than usual.
you were about to put down the needle when someone knocked on the door twice. you turned your head slowly, not wanting to wake giselle, you rose quietly, crossed the room, and opened the door just a crack. and when you opened it you weren’t expecting to see him.
prince ri ki was there, slightly out of breath, as if he had run all the way. you slipped into the hallway before he could speak, closing the door gently behind you.
“your highness?” you quickly bowed, trying to keep your voice steady.
he shook his head, glancing over your shoulder, making sure you were alone.
“no time for formalities. pack your things.” he said quietly but firmly. “only what’s necessary.”
“what?” you blinked. “i don’t understand.”
“it’s an order.” he repeated, gentle but serious.
you didn’t ask anything else. you didn’t have the strength to. with trembling hands, you stuffed what little you had into a small bag. giselle was still asleep, unaware of what was happening. you didn’t have time to say goodbye.
you paused for a second at the door, glancing back toward the bed where giselle was still asleep under the thick blankets, her breathing calm.
“don’t worry about her.” ri ki said quietly when he saw you hesitate.
as you followed him, you passed through corridors you were usually not allowed in. ri ki walked quickly but with ease, greeting every guard naturally, as if nothing was out of the ordinary.
“can i know where we’re going?” you whispered, trying not to sound scared as you stepped through a back door into the garden.
ni ki didn’t answer. he just kept walking, circling one of the old fountains in the back.
and then you saw him.
jungwon. standing beside the oldest rose bush in the palace. no sign of fever. not a trace of illness. his back straight, his face lit by the moon, and his eyes fixed on you like he had never stopped watching.
“what is this…?” you asked, confused, dropping the bag at your feet.
“no time, milady.” jungwon said, walking toward you. his voice was urgent, different, like he knew every second counted. “we have to go.”
“go?” you frowned, stepping back. “what are you doing?”
“i’ll explain later.” he said, taking your hand. his palm was warm, steady, and that only confused you more.
“there’s a carriage waiting further down, at the north path,” said ri ki giving his brother your bag. “i’ll take care of the rest.”
ri ki looked at him for a long second, like he wanted to say something else. then he simply pulled him into a hug. strong, one arm across his back, the other hand resting on the back of jungwon’s neck.
“you’re going to be okay, alright?” ri ki murmured into his ear, voice trembling. “i’ve got it. you just… live, okay?”
jungwon nodded, biting his lip as he pulled away.
“thank you, brother. for everything.”
ri ki grabbed his shoulders and gave him a small shake, eyes glistening.
“don’t thank me now. thank me when you’ve got a home far away from here, a new name, and… her by your side.” he looked your way briefly before turning back.
you stood frozen, feeling the air shift. you still didn’t fully understand what was happening, just that it was big. too big.
“take care of him, will you?” ri ki said quietly, almost pleading.
before you could reply, he turned and walked back into the garden, disappearing into the mist and shadows of the palace.
jungwon didn’t wait another second.
“quickly.” he said, tugging your hand.
“what—? jungwon— where are we going?”
“trust me.” he said simply, and then started running.
your steps were clumsy at first, stumbling a little from the pace. the mud clung to your shoes, and soon the edges of your white gown were completely stained. the hem dragged dirt, leaves, branches. the cold bit at your skin, but jungwon didn’t stop.
and neither did you. because he didn’t let go.
the bells started ringing before you reached the carriage. one, then another. their echo sliced through the air violently, making you shiver.
taaan!
taaan!
taaan!
the sound spread through the valley, from the highest towers of the palace. it wasn’t any ordinary bell. it was the mourning call. the one they rang only when someone of royalty had died.
and then, you heard it. a distant scream from the east wing of the castle.
“prince jungwon is dead!”
epilogue.
the sky had that soft color that appears when the sun starts to set but hasn’t quite decided to leave yet. a shade between gold and peach slipped through the light curtains of the small country house they now lived in. it was one of those afternoons when everything felt calm, like even time itself had decided to pause for a few more minutes.
the kitchen smelled like freshly baked bread and mandarins. lots of mandarins. your daughter, barely five years old, was sitting on one of the high chairs with a wrinkled apron and sticky cheeks from juice. she had peeled four, or maybe five mandarins with more enthusiasm than technique, leaving a messy pile of peels on the wooden table.
“mom, look at this one, it’s weird.” she said with a smile, holding up a slice that, in her eyes, looked like a heart.
“it’s because it has love.” you replied, gently brushing her hair, feeling that warmth that only simple moments can give you.
the back door was open, letting in the sound of the wind, rustling branches. your youngest son came running down the stairs. barefoot, holding a stick he insisted on calling his “royal sword”.
“i’m going with dad!” he yelled, his giggles being contagios.
you barely managed to say “put on shoes” but he was already gone. you watched him run across the garden, where the grass was still wet with dew.
and there was jungwon.
his back turned. hair longer, tied with a leather strap. his body stronger, broader. arms marked by daily labor, broad shoulders under a white linen shirt rolled up to the elbows. chopping wood like he’d done it all his life.
the prince he once was, now just a man. a husband. a father.
“daaad!” the boy yelled, running toward him, barefoot and with mud-stained pants. jungwon dropped the axe instantly to lift him into the air, spinning once as they both laughed.
you stepped onto the porch holding your daughter’s hand. she kept eating mandarins while you tried to wipe the juice from the corners of her lips.
the image stayed with you like a painting: the sunlight filtering through the trees, your daughter playing with mandarin peels, your son clinging to jungwon’s neck, and him, looking at you from the garden as if he didn’t need anything else in the world but that.
you.
jungwon looked at you, and kissed your forehead when you got close. his hand was rough from working the land, but warm. real. your fingers laced with his almost without thinking, like your body did it on its own.
“today’s a good day to go to the lake.” he murmured.
“yeah… today everything feels right.”
you looked around. there were no carriages, no jewels, no titles. there were winters by the fireplace with everyone huddled under a blanket. there were summers running through flower fields, and laughter that disappeared into the wind. there were nights when jungwon held your hand in silence, saying nothing, but with eyes full of gratitude because you chose him. because you saved him.
the sacrifice.
the lie.
the freedom.
all to get here.
the kingdom you built together had no castles. but it was, without a doubt, the happiest one.
genre— angst (not really) hurt/comfort, slice of life, domestic
pairing— reader × jay (husband!jay)
synopsis— after the worst day in a long time, you get in jay’s car without a word. you don’t mean to be mean, but when he asks what’s wrong, everything you’ve buried comes crashing out.
you stood outside the building, hands freezing, breath visible in the air even though it wasn’t that cold. your phone screen showed his name on the lock screen, calling you because you were late. because you said you’d be out by six, and it was already pushing seven.
it was supposed to be an easy day. a few reports, a presentation, some annoying emails. you’ve handled worse. but today, nothing worked. the printer jammed, your coworker dumped their part of the work on you last minute, your boss nitpicked everything you did like it was personal, and someone even made a comment about how tired you looked in the elevator. you forgot your lunch on the kitchen counter this morning. you spilled coffee on your shirt before noon. and then had to stay late to redo something that wasn’t even your mistake.
so, yeah. you were already over it before you even stepped into jay’s car.
you pull the door shut without saying anything. just drop your bag at your feet and lean your head back against the seat, eyes closed.
jay turns his head, smile ready but it falters the second he sees your face.
you don’t look at him. don’t say hi. don’t even breathe in his direction. your jaw’s tight, arms crossed, eyes fixed out the window like the sky pissed you off too.
jay watches you for a second, hand still resting on the steering wheel. “hey, baby..” he says softly, “you okay?”
you exhale, sharp and tired. “just drive, jay.”
his brows pull together. “okay…” he puts the car in drive, silence wrapping around both of you. but he keeps glancing over, concern growing. “work was that bad, huh?”
you don’t respond. you’re chewing your bottom lip raw, picking at your nails like if you stay quiet long enough, you’ll disappear into the leather seat.
jay tries again, gentle. “wanna talk about it?”
“no.”
“you sure? maybe i can help—”
“i said no, jay.” it came out harsher than you intended, turning to him.
jay blinked, pulling the car up to a red light. “alright. but you don’t have to snap at me, baby.”
“jesus.” you mutter under your breath, head falling back against the seat, again. “i’m not snapping, you just don’t listen.”
his hand grips the wheel a little tighter, but his voice stays calm. “don’t do that. i’m trying here.”
you shake your head. “i don’t need you to try. i just need peace. five fucking minutes without someone asking me to explain myself.”
that does it.
he pulls the car over to the side of the road and puts it in park. turns to face you fully.
“baby, what’s wrong with you tonight?” his voice is low now. not angry, hurt. “you’ve been all snappy since you got in the car.
you open your mouth, to yell, to bite back, to say something that’ll push him further away, but instead it crumbles.
your lip wobbles. breath catches. and then it hits you all at once.
the tears you’ve been holding back since noon break loose. they burst out of your eyes like a dam finally gave in. you turn your face to your hands, sobbing so hard like you’ve been holding it in for weeks.
jay’s already unbuckling. leaning over to wrap his arms around you. “oh, sweetheart—” he whispers, wrapping you in his arms before you can even think.
“i’m so tired..” you cry into his chest. “everything’s falling apart. they dumped everything on me again, and i messed up and my boss was on my ass and i didn’t even get to eat and—fuck, i’m sorry. i’m so sorry.”
“hey, it’s okay. don’t apologize.” he murmurs, brushing your hair back. “my poor girl. why didn’t you say something sooner?”
you can barely talk through the sobs, but it spills out in pieces. how everything just felt too much and you didn’t know how to breathe anymore.
“you should’ve called me..” he says gently, brushing your hair back. “i would’ve brought you lunch. you’re my wife. if something it’s happening, you have to tell me.”
he pulls back just enough to cup your face, thumbing away your tears. your shoulders shake again and he kisses your forehead.
“you’re so strong, baby. i’m proud of you, especially on the worst days.”
“i was mean to you..” you whisper.
“you were overwhelmed.” he corrects gently. “you don’t have to be perfect with me. i know who you are, and i love you. all of you. even the tired, pissed off version.”
you let out a broken laugh, still teary.
he tucks your hair behind your ear. “we’re gonna go home. i’m gonna run you a bath, order your favourite food and rub your back until you fall asleep. okay?”
you nod slowly, clinging to him.
“okay..” you whisper. “thank you.”
“always, baby.” he says, kissing your temple again. “you don’t have to go through any of this alone.”
synopsis | it’s jake’s first time and he’s so whiny, needy, and sensitive.he keeps begging even when he’s crying, just wants to be inside you forever.
pairing | sub!virgin jake x f!reader
genre | smut, fluff (with a messy twist)
content warning | sub!jake, virgin!jake, overstimulation, crying, begging, praise, riding, soft dom!reader, cockwarming, aftercare, clingy behavior, smut, explicit content, mention of tears, slightly dumbified jake, first time, very soft but messy.
you didn’t expect him to be this sensitive.
it was his first time, sure, but the way jake was clinging to you like you’d disappear the second you let go, that caught you off guard.
you were on top, straddling him on your bed, the room dimly lit with just the warm glow of your bedside lamp. his shirt was tossed somewhere on the floor, his cheeks flushed red as he looked up at you with wide, desperate eyes.
“you okay?” you whispered, brushing your thumb along his jaw.
he nodded quickly, too quickly, hips jerking up a little from how needy he was. “y-yeah, just—feels so good. i didn’t know it would feel like this…”
you smiled gently, leaning down to kiss him before finally sinking down on him all the way.
his head fell back instantly, lips parted in a soft, broken moan.
“ah—fuck…fuck, you’re so warm…” he whimpered, hands gripping your hips tight like he didn’t know what else to do. “oh my god…”
you gave him a moment to adjust, watching him fall apart just from the feeling of being inside you .he was already so gone, his hair messy, eyes glassy, legs trembling under you.
you started to move slowly, rolling your hips against him, and his reaction was instant. he gasped, the prettiest sound you’d ever heard, and clung to you like you were his lifeline.
“baby.. “ you said softly “breathe.”
“trying..” he panted, hips twitching up again. “but it’s—it’s too much. i can’t think when you do that—”
you leaned down, kissing the corner of his mouth as you picked up the pace. his moans got louder, more desperate, and he buried his face in your neck, whimpering every time your hips met.
“you’re doing so good. ”you murmured “so, so good for me.”
he was close already, you could feel it. his entire body was tensing, breath hitching as he cried out your name.
and then he came, hips stuttering wildly, voice breaking into little whines as he spilled inside you, shaking under your hands.
you slowed down, still holding him gently, expecting him to go soft and rest…but he didn’t.
his hands stayed on your hips, pulling you closer again, and he looked up at you with the softest, neediest eyes you’d ever seen.
“can we do it again?”he asked quietly.
you blinked. “you just came.”
“i know” he whispered “but i don’t wanna stop. feels too good.i need you, please.”
his voice cracked on the last word, and you could already feel how hard he was getting again, still inside you. he was sensitive now, you could tell by the way he twitched when you moved the slightest bit.
“it’s gonna hurt.” you said, brushing your fingers through his hair.
“i don’t care.” he mumbled “i like it. i like when it hurts.”
you kissed him again and started moving, slower this time, deeper, letting him feel every second of it. he gasped, crying out softly, but he didn’t stop you. he was already whimpering, tears pricking the corners of his eyes, but his arms stayed around you, holding you so close you could barely move.
“you’re so pretty like this.” you told him “so messy. just for me.”
he moaned at that, hips jerking up again, even though it made him cry out.
“too much?” you asked gently.
he nodded, voice shaky. “yeah, but don’t stop.”
you were still moving, slow and deep, and jake looked completely wrecked, flushed cheeks, sweaty hair stuck to his forehead, eyes shiny with tears.
but even through all of it, he was looking up at you.
his head tilted back just slightly, his eyes were locking on where your bodies met, watching your hips roll, watching the way he kept sliding in and out of you, all slick and wet and perfect. his mouth opened, lips trembling a little, like he couldn’t even process it.
“you like it?” you teased, breathless.
he nodded quickly, too far gone to speak right away.then he mumbled, voice wrecked, “you look so pretty when you ride me…it’s so wet…feels so good…i can see it going in and out—fuck…”
his hips jerked up at the same time, and he whimpered from how sensitive he was. but his eyes didn’t move. still glued to the spot, like it was hypnotizing. his jaw slack, chest rising and falling fast, little whines spilling out every time your hips sank back down.
you leaned in, brushing your thumb over his bottom lip. he gasped, tongue flicking out slightly, and you felt him twitch inside you again.
“my pretty boy..” you whispered “you’re gonna come again?”
he nodded immediately, voice breathy and high “uh-huh. i think i already am.”
and he was. he kept watching, mesmerized by the way you kept riding him. he kept whispering how much he loved you, how good you felt, how he never wanted to stop.
when he came again, nothing came out, just a dry twitch and a choked cry. he was completely gone, overwhelmed, overstimulated, and clinging to you like he’d fall apart without you.
you stayed like that for a while, holding him close, brushing your fingers through his hair as he trembled beneath you.
“i can’t feel my legs” he mumbled into your neck.
“you did so good for me.” you whispered back.
he smiled, dazed and soft, still inside you, still wrapped around you, like he never wanted to be anywhere else.
his arms tightened around you again, and even though you were barely moving now, he still wouldn’t let you go.
“please don’t leave me..” he whispered, voice barely there because he was still trying to catch his breath.
“i won’t..” you promised, leaning in to kiss his temple. “you’re safe with me.”
he just nodded and buried his face into your neck, his breath hot against your skin. you felt him still inside you, so warm, so needy, and you couldn’t help but smile, caressing his back gently.
synopsis | after years of fighting and growing apart, your relationship with jake is hanging by a thread. you’ve tried to fix things, but it’s always been one step forward, two steps back. what you’d didn’t expect was that having a baby could be the thing that gives you a real chance at starting over.
pairing | boyfriend! jake x fem! reader
content warning | smut (mdni) + reconciliation + angst + fluff if you squint + unprotected sex + swearing + pregnancy mention
the car was dead silent. you sat there, seething, arms crossed tightly across your chest, staring out the window as the city blurred by. the same damn argument again. you could feel the heat of anger still crawling through your veins.
jake sat next to you, gripping the wheel like it was the only thing keeping him from losing his shit. his eyes stayed glued to the road, mouth set in a hard line. he hadn’t said a word in at least ten minutes, and at this point, you weren’t sure if he was waiting for you to cool down or just hoping you’d both drop it.
you hated how this always went down. he’d come home late, every time the same excuses, the same apologies that felt like nothing more than words he was saying because he thought he had to. you didn’t know how many times you had to tell him that actions spoke louder than apologies, but he never seemed to hear it.
the worst part was how long it had been since the two of you had spent any real time together. you couldn’t even remember the last time you were happy together, without ending up arguing.
you hated this. hated feeling like the last thing he cared about. but you weren’t sure if he even realized how deep this ran for you. instead, you were here, heading to his mom’s, like everything was fine, like you weren’t both completely pissed at each other. the silence was killing you both.
this morning, you both had woken up calm, but as soon as jake told you to get ready to see his mom, everything shifted. you weren’t angry about visiting her, you were angry because he was so casual about it, like nothing had happened. like last night’s argument didn’t exist. like you hadn’t gone to bed fuming and he hadn’t fallen asleep with his back turned to you.
you weren’t against seeing his mom, but the way he said it so nonchalantly, as if everything was fine, made your blood boil. it wasn’t fine. nothing was fine.
jake slowed the car, pulling into the driveway. you could see his mom’s car parked out front, the same way it always was when she was home and could hear the muffled sound of dogs barking from the neighborhood.
the car stopped, but neither of you moved. you both just sat there.
jake finally exhaled, dropping his head back against the seat. “are you still mad?”
you ignored him, twisting in your seat to check the back. your brows furrowed, eyes scanning the floor before you turned back to him. “where’s the bag?”
jake blinked at you, clearly not following. “what bag?”
you shut your eyes for a second, already feeling your blood pressure spike. “the pink plastic bag for your mom, sim jaeyun. i told you to grab it before we left.”
jake frowned, shaking his head. “no, you didn’t.”
your fingers dug into your arms. “yes, i fucking did. it was on the counter. i literally told you right before we walked out the door.”
jake leaned back in his seat, rubbing his forehead. “well, i don’t remember that. if you told me, i would’ve grabbed it.”
you let out a short laugh, but it wasn’t amused at all. “are you serious? you never listen! like ever!”
jake let out a slow, pissed-off breath. “jesus christ, it’s a fucking plastic bag.”
you turned to him so fast he actually blinked. “it’s not about the bag, dumbass! it’s about the fact that you don’t fucking listen to me. ever. i ask you to do one simple thing, and somehow, it’s too much.”
jake scoffed, shaking his head. “oh my god. here we fucking go.” he unbuckled his seatbelt like he was about to get out, but your patience was officially gone and you threw open the car door before so hard it bounced a little.
“forget it.”
jake let out a heavy sigh, trying to keep himself from saying something worse. you didn’t wait for a response, you slammed the door shut and started walking toward the house. the cold air hit you, but it wasn’t enough to cool the anger simmering under your skin.
behind you, you heard his door open and shut, his footsteps following, but you didn’t slow down.
“are we seriously doing this right now?” jake’s voice was low, frustrated, but not loud enough for anyone inside to hear.
you didn’t answer. you just kept walking.
“jesus christ.” he muttered under his breath, picking up his pace until he was right beside you. “you’re really gonna act like this over a fucking bag? it’s like i forgot your birthday or something. it was a plastic bag.”
that made you stop. you turned on him so fast he actually took a step back.
“stop saying it’s about the fucking bag, jake,” you snapped, your voice sharp but still quiet enough to not cause a scene. “it’s about the fact that you don’t listen. you never listen. and then you act like i’m crazy for being mad about it.”
jake ran a hand through his hair, exhaling, trying to stay patient. “i don’t freaking do it on purpose—”
“but you do it.” you cut in. “over and over.”
for a second, he didn’t say anything. just stood there, looking at you, jaw tight. then, he shook his head and scoffed, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets. “whatever. i don’t have the energy for this right now.”
you let out a humorless laugh. “yeah? neither do i.”
you turned and walked up the steps, ringing the doorbell before he could say anything else. jake stayed behind you, silent now, probably trying to pull himself together before facing his mom.
the door swung open, and like muscle memory, you forced a smile. it wasn’t real, not even close, but at this point, you were on autopilot. just going through the motions, pretending everything was fine when it really fucking wasn’t.
jake’s mom beamed, her usual warm energy filling the doorway. “well, look who finally showed up!” she said, hands on her hips. “i was starting to think you two forgot about me.”
you forced a smile, stepping inside. “of course not.” you said as you hugged her briefly.
jake leaned down, wrapping an arm around his mom’s shoulders. “hey, mama,” he said, his voice noticeably softer than it had been with you all day.
his mom squeezed him, pulling back with a smile. “it’s so good to see you, jake. you’re looking well.”
he exhaled. “traffic was bad.”
she waved a hand like she didn’t care. “as long as you’re here now. come on in, i made plenty of food.”
jake’s mom, bless her heart, had already prepared for this visit. the whole house smelled like her cooking, and there was a soft hum of background music coming from somewhere in the kitchen.
jake’s mom, bless her heart, had already prepared for this visit. the whole house smelled like her cooking, and there was a soft hum of background music coming from somewhere in the kitchen.
jake’s mom set down a plate in front of you before taking a seat across the table. “so, how have you been handling everything at home?” she asked, giving you a knowing look.
you glanced at jake for a split second before forcing a small smile. “it’s been fine. same old, you know.”
she hummed, cutting into her food. “jake tells me he’s been working late a lot.”
you let out a small, dry laugh. “yeah, you could say that.”
jake glanced at you, but you ignored him, taking a sip of your drink instead.
his mom sighed, shaking her head. “that boy works too much. i keep telling him he needs to slow down before he burns himself out.”
you set your glass down. “i’ve tried telling him the same thing, but he doesn’t listen to me either.”
his mom nodded, giving jake a pointed look. “i just don’t want you to overdo it, honey. you’re working all the time, and you’re not getting any younger.”
jake exhaled through his nose, already over this conversation. “i’m fine, mom.”
but she wasn’t done. “you know, speaking of…” she said, tilting her head slightly, “when are you two going to give me a grandbaby?”
jake choked on his drink, coughing into his sleeve. you froze for half a second before blinking.
his mom just grinned. “i mean, i’d love to spoil a little one before i’m too old to chase after them.”
jake dragged a hand down his face. “mom—”
“what?” she said, all innocent. “it’s a fair question.”
jake barely reacted at first, just sat there with his hands on his lap, slouched in his seat. but then, as his mom kept talking, he glanced at you. it wasn’t much, just a quick look, like he was expecting you to roll your eyes or shake your head, the same way you did whenever his mom brought up something ridiculous.
but you didn’t.
you just sat there, eyes fixed on your plate, quiet. and something about the way you looked, not pissed, not annoyed. in your eyes there was something different in them, something softer. a little flicker, a kind of sparkle he couldn’t quite place.
had you thought about it before?
that was a stupid question. obviously, you had. but had you thought about it with him?
he barely heard what his mom was saying anymore, his focus entirely on you. his fingers twitched slightly against his thigh.
you must’ve felt him staring because you finally turned your head, locking eyes with him. for a moment, neither of you spoke.
your brow lifted slightly and jake blinked looking away fast. he cleared his throat, shifting in his seat. “mom, can we just eat?”
his mom laughed, shaking her head. “alright, alright. i’ll let it go.”
but jake wasn’t sure if he could.
dinner went on, conversation moving to his mom’s garden, some neighbor’s drama, a show she was hooked on. you played along, nodding and laughing where you had to, and so did jake, but his mind was stuck on something else.
that look in your eyes.
jake didn’t know what the fuck to do with that.
by the time dinner wrapped up, you were in the kitchen with jake’s mom, drying dishes while jake stayed at the table, glued to his phone. he hadn’t said much all night, just scrolling through his phone.
his mom handed you another plate and looked over at him. “that boy’s always on that damn phone,” she muttered as she worked. “works too much, too. tells me it’s all just part of the job, but…”
you glanced at jake. he wasn’t even looking up, still absorbed in whatever was on his phone. “yeah, i know,” you said, kind of offhand.
jake’s mom let out a small sigh, shaking her head. “he needs to make more time for other stuff, you know? for you. for… whatever else.”
you just shrugged, drying another plate. “i’ve tried,” you said, quietly.
but jake, even though he looked like he wasn’t paying attention, actually was. he was listening to every word. he kept his face blank, not moving, but his attention was all on you two.
his mom paused, watching you for a second before asking, “how are you, though? really?”
you shrugged, trying to sound fine. “i’m good.”
“i didn’t make you uncomfortable with the baby talk, did i?” she added, quieter now, as she dried her hands.
you quickly shook your head. “nah. no, it’s fine.”
but there it was, the tiny shift in your eyes, just for a second. you weren’t exactly telling her everything, but she saw it. she noticed. she wasn’t going to push, but she was curious.
“have you thought about it?” she asked after a pause.
you hesitated, your fingers tightening slightly around the dish plate. “maybe…” you admitted quietly. “just… not sure if now is the right time.” with things so messed up with jake, of course it wasn’t.
the thought had crossed your mind. how could it not? every time you saw kids playing outside, every time you passed by a baby section in a store, every time a friend shared pictures of their little ones, you wondered. what would it be like? would it change things? would it fix things? but the reality hit you just as fast as the thought came.
let’s be real, jake hadn’t touched you in what felt like forever. it wasn’t just the lack of intimacy; it was everything that came with it. the distance, the exhaustion in his voice when he got home late, the way he barely looked at you some days. there was a time when he couldn’t keep his hands off you, when just passing each other in the kitchen would turn into something more.
now? now, it was like you were just existing in the same space, nothing more.
“i don’t think i would even be a good mother.” you forced a small smile, trying to brush it off.
jake heard it, loud and clear. his fingers stopped mid-scroll, and his shoulders tensed slightly.
his mom set down the dish towel, frowning. “why would you say that?”
you let out a small laugh, but there was no real humor in it. “i don’t know. i just…” you shrugged.
“oh, sweetheart, you’d be a great mother.” her hand approached your shoulder and left a small squeeze.
you swallowed, gripping the dish plate a little tighter. you smiled a little, but it wasn’t real. she didn’t see the whole picture. how lonely it felt sometimes. how every conversation about spending more time with jake turned into an argument and never went anywhere.
they just ran in circles until you both got too tired to keep going.
jake didn’t say it enough. heck, he barely said it at all anymore, but he thought about you all the time. how you held things together. the way you handled everything working, running the house, dealing with him, even when you probably shouldn’t have to.
and hearing you say that you didn’t think you’d be a good mom? it hit him hard. he wasn’t sure if you knew, but to him, you were everything. if anyone could do it, could be a great mom, it was you. you could handle it. you could handle anything.
but had he ever told you that? had he ever shown you? all the stuff you did, all the sacrifices, and how much he appreciated it?
no, he hadn’t. he realized that now. he hadn’t been there like he should’ve been. the late nights, the ignoring, all the times you tried to reach out and he pulled away. how could you believe him if he’d never shown it? how could you believe anything he said if he didn’t back it up with actions?
the drive home was dead quiet, like always. you weren’t even looking at him, just staring out the window, arms crossed, fingers tapping against your sleeve, like you couldn’t wait to be anywhere but here.
jake kept his eyes on the road, hands gripping the wheel a little too tightly. he wanted to say something, maybe break the silence, but he didn’t even know where to start.
when he pulled into the driveway, you didn’t wait. you unbuckled your seatbelt, got out, and shut the door a little harder than necessary. jake stayed in the car for a second, watching you walk up to the house, before sighing and following.
inside, the only light on was the dim glow from the kitchen. the house felt cold, lifeless, probably because it had been for a while now. you kicked off your shoes, didn’t even glance at him, and headed straight for the bedroom. jake exhaled, rubbing a hand down his face before locking the door behind him.
he wasn’t sure what hurt more, the fights or the distance. but either way, it felt like losing.
jake followed you into the room, standing in the doorway as you began to take off your coat, dropping it onto the chair. his gaze followed you for a moment, the silence between you both heavy, almost suffocating. he didn’t want to press, but the words slipped out before he could stop them.
“why didn’t you tell me?” his voice was low, almost like he was asking himself as much as he was asking you.
you paused, glancing over your shoulder at him, brows furrowing slightly. “about what?” you asked, genuinely confused.
jake pushed off the doorframe, stepping into the room a little more, his gaze not leaving you. “about the kids?”
you sighed, shaking your head as you pulled off your earrings, setting them down on the dresser. “it was just a dumb thought” you muttered, not even looking at him.
jake watched you for a second, his jaw tightening. “didn’t sound dumb to me.”
you let out a small, humorless laugh, finally turning to face him. “yeah? well, it is.” your arms crossed over your chest. “not like it matters anyway.”
his brows furrowed slightly. “why wouldn’t it matter?”
you exhaled, shaking your head. “jake, come on. look at us.” you gestured vaguely between the two of you. “we can barely have a conversation without it turning into an argument. you barely even look at me.” your voice was calm, but there was something tired underneath it.
jake stared at you, his fingers twitching at his sides. he wanted to say something, argue, deny it, tell you it wasn’t dumb. he wanted to tell you that he saw you all the time. that even when he came home exhausted, even when he was distracted, even when things were tense between you, he still saw you. he noticed the way you hummed under your breath when you cooked, the way you pulled your sleeves over your hands when you were tired, the way you always waited up for him even when you pretended you weren’t.
but what did any of that matter if he never said it? if he never showed it?
then, you sighed, rubbing at your temple. “jake, i don’t wanna do this right now.”
you changed into your pajamas and climbed into bed, facing the wall. you could hear the faint sounds of jake moving around in the other room, pacing once or twice before finally settling down somewhere.
minutes passed.
then an hour.
and still, you couldn’t sleep.
“how would you name them?”
you blinked, staring at the ceiling. for a second, you thought you imagined it. jake’s voice was quiet, coming from your side. you hadn’t even heard him lay next to you.
you turned slightly, just enough to glance at him. his head was already turned looking at you, his expression unreadable.
“what?” you asked, your voice softer than before.
he exhaled through his nose, shifting his stance. “if we had kids.” he paused before speaking again. “how would you name them?”
your fingers curled slightly into the blanket. you weren’t sure if he was asking just to ask or if this actually meant something to him.
you swallowed, then looked away. “i don’t know.” jake didn’t push, but he didn’t drop the conversation either. neither did you. “…maybe something classic. nothing too complicated.”
jake nodded slightly, like he was thinking about it. “like what?”
you hesitated, then shrugged. “i always liked names like—” you stopped, suddenly self-conscious.
jake tilted his head slightly. “like what?”
“i don’t know. maybe something that lookalike our names or—” you hesitated again, then shook your head. “it’s stupid.”
jake shook his head once. “hey it’s not stupid.” he was watching you, with something different in his eyes now. something quieter, something softer.
you glanced at him, then quickly looked away. “yeah.”
a beat of silence.
“what about a girl?”
you exhaled, staring up at the ceiling. “why are you asking me this?”
“i don’t know,” he admitted. “i just… want to know.”
the room felt heavier now, but not in the way it usually did after a fight. this wasn’t resentment or frustration hanging in the air, it was something else. something uncertain.
you shifted on the bed, pulling your knees up slightly, resting your arms over them. “it doesn’t matter. it’s not like we—” you stopped yourself, shaking your head. “never mind.”
jake didn’t let it go. “not like we what?”
you sighed, looking down at your hands. “not like we’re in the place to even think about that.”
“why not?”
you could feel the weight of his stare, the way he was waiting, pressing for an answer. you swallowed hard. “jake,” you started, your voice almost flat, like you were forcing yourself to say it. “we don’t even kiss anymore.”
“can i kiss you right now then?”
your stomach dropped. you weren’t expecting that, not so direct, not so steady. his voice was low, but there was no hesitation in it. he wasn’t teasing, wasn’t playing around. he was serious.
you blinked at him, feeling suddenly too aware of how close he was. you could see the way his fingers curled slightly against his knee, the way his breathing was just a little heavier than before.
“i’m just going to bed, jake,” you said quickly, your voice tight. you turned away, trying to put space between you, but before you could lie down, his hand wrapped around your wrist.
“come here,” he muttered, pulling you back toward him.
you let out a quiet, startled breath as you shifted, and suddenly, he was closer, closer than he had been in a long time. his grip wasn’t rough, but it was firm, keeping you right in front of him. his face was inches from yours now, his eyes locked onto yours, watching your every move.
your breath hitched. his hand was still around your wrist, his fingers warm against your skin. you could feel how steady he was, how he wasn’t rushing, just holding you there, watching you.
“jake…” you started, but your voice was barely above a whisper. you didn’t even know what you were trying to say.
he didn’t say anything. he just let go of your wrist, his hand trailing down slowly, his fingers barely grazing against your palm before resting on your thigh. his touch was warm, grounding, but not hesitant. he was waiting.
you swallowed, your throat suddenly dry. his face was so close now, his breath mixing with yours, warm and slow. you could see everything, the way his lips parted slightly, the way his eyes flickered down to your mouth for just a second before coming back up.
a shaky exhale slipped past your lips. you weren’t even sure if you meant to do it, but it filled the silence, made it feel more real.
then, so quietly you almost didn’t catch it, he asked again, “can i kiss you?”
you inhaled sharply, but before you could answer, he moved. his hand slid up your thigh, slow enough that it sent a shiver through you, stopping at your waist as he pulled you even closer. you barely had time to react before his lips brushed against yours, just barely, not even a full kiss yet, just a ghost of a touch.
you made a soft sound, something caught between a sigh and a whimper, and that was all it took. jake’s fingers tightened at your waist, and then he kissed you for real, pressing his mouth against yours, warm and firm and just a little desperate.
you gasped softly against him, your fingers twitching before reaching for him, gripping onto his shirt. his lips moved against yours, slow at first, savoring, but there was tension beneath it, something deeper, something that had been left untouched for too long.
he exhaled sharply through his nose, his other hand coming up to cup the side of your face, his thumb brushing against your cheek.
you could hear the way your breaths mixed together, how your heart was pounding so loudly it almost drowned out the quiet creak of the mattress as he shifted pinning you down.
when he pulled back just slightly, just enough to look at you, his lips were parted, his breathing uneven. his forehead nearly touched yours, and he swallowed,
he looked at you like he was memorizing you, like he was seeing something he wasn’t sure he deserved to touch.
“you’d be a good mom..” he said suddenly.
your breath hitched and you stared at him. you weren’t expecting that.
his thumb brushed over your cheek slowly. “i thought about it,” he admitted, sliding up to your jaw, tilting your face slightly. his touch was so gentle it almost hurt. “i think about it more than i should.”
your chest ached. he was looking at you like he was seeing it, like he could picture it so clearly, it hurt.
“i don’t know if i would’ve been a good dad,” he admitted, voice barely above a whisper. “but you? baby, you would’ve been everything.”
your breath caught. it was the first time he’d called you that in a long time. “jake…”
“you take care of people even when they don’t deserve it. even when i don’t deserve it.” he let out a small, breathless chuckle. “i fucked up so bad, didn’t i?” his lips pressed together before he looked at you again.
jake swallowed. his thumb traced a slow, barely-there circle against your skin. you closed your eyes, inhaling shakily.
“can i hold you?” his voice was quiet, careful. “just… for a second?”
you hesitated. but then you nodded.
and jake didn’t waste a second.
he pulled you in, wrapping his arms around you like he was afraid you’d disappear if he didn’t hold tight enough. his hand cradled the back of your head, his breath warm against your skin as he exhaled shakily. “i’m sorry, baby,” he murmured against your hair. “i’m so fucking sorry.”
and for the first time in a long time, you let yourself sink into him.
jake pulled back slightly, his gaze intense, searching yours. “you think having a baby right now’s gonna make this all go away?” his thumb brushed along your jawline gently. “maybe it won’t fix everything, but it’d damn well give us something real to work toward, something we could both look at and know we’re doing this for something better.”
“we can’t avoid the fact that we need something, baby. we can’t just keep pretending everything’s fine. this…” he let out a breath, his hand dropping to your waist, pulling you closer. “this thing between us, what we’ve been doing. it’s broken, and i know it. but you, baby… i know we can fix this. i want to fix this. and i want you with me while we do it.”
his words hung in the air, the quiet pressure in his tone making it clear that he wasn’t asking. he wasn’t waiting for you to decide for him, either. it was like he already had his mind made up, like this was the path he was going to push for, whether you were ready or not.
“i need you to be on the same page as me, sweetheart,” jake said, his voice dropping lower. “i need you to trust me, like i trust you. no more running, no more acting like we don’t both feel this.” his hands moved down, pulling you even closer, his chest against yours, his breath warm against your skin.
jake’s body shifted against yours, and you felt something hard press against your thigh. the suddenness of it made your heart race, and the space between you seemed to close even more. his breathing was heavier now, his eyes locked onto yours, waiting for any reaction.
jake’s body was shaking, his breath coming out in short, desperate gasps. he was right on the edge, every part of him trembling as he held you close.
“fuck..” he groaned, his voice wavering. his breath was hot against your ear, desperate and whiny. “i need this… need you to—shit, baby, don’t stop… please.”
the bed creaked with every movement, the sounds of your bodies colliding filling the room. jake’s breath was ragged, quick gasps escaping his lips as his body pressed against yours, sweaty and trembling.
his hands slid over your skin, the sweat making everything feel slick. “god, you feel so good..” he whimpered, his voice cracking with the effort to stay in control. “i’m close… so fucking close.”
he kissed you deeply, his lips trembling against yours, and he groaned at the sight of you, perfect, needy, ready to break.
“you’re gonna have my baby..” he whispered, as he buried his face in your neck “i’ll give you everything. just let go, baby. come for me, and i’ll fill you up… i need you to… please.”
the bed creaked once more, the sound louder as he thrust deeper. jake’s voice was trembling as he fought to hold himself back. the sound of his voice, so weak, so strained, made you shiver.
“hey, hey… look at me.” he murmured, gripping your chin to make you look at him. “mine. you know that, right?”
you nodded weakly, barely able to form words as he kept squeezing his dick deep inside of you. you hair was a mess and you could barely snort the strands that were getting in your face
“what do you want?” jake asked, hi grip on you tightened as he thrust deeper, his breath ragged against your ear.
you tried to answer, but the way he pushed deeper stole your words, leaving only a shaky gasp.
“a girl?” he murmured, his lips brushing against your ear. “i bet she’d look just—” another thrust, harder this time ”—like you.”
you could only moaned in response, fingers tangling in his hair as he moved against you, completely lost in the moment.
“you want to get married?” he looked down at you. you nodded quickly, the sensation overwhelming as he hit just the right spot. “yeah?” he urged, wanting to hear you say it.
“fuck yes” you breathed, your response coming out desperate and filled with need, lips parting as another moan slipped free.
his teeth scraped against you jaw before he kissed you hard, swallowing every sound you made. his breath hitched as he pulled you closer, his hands shaking slightly with urgency.
“come on, baby… let me feel you.” jake murmured, his voice trembling with a mix of need and desperation. “i need you..” he rasped, his voice almost breaking. “need you to come for me. please, baby… i need to feel you.”
your breath came in shallow gasps, and your body shuddering with the pleasure he was giving you. “jake…” you moaned, your nails digging into his skin as you clung to him.
“fuck—baby—” His voice cracked, his grip on your hips tightening like he was afraid to let go. “I c-can’t—shit, I’m gonna—”
he was so deep, his body stiffening against yours as he let out the neediest whine, his forehead pressing against yours. his skin was burning, damp with sweat, muscles twitching from how hard he was holding back.
the bed rocked with every movement, the headboard knocking against the wall as jake’s body tensed, his breath coming out in short, desperate gasps. his hands were shaking, his fingers digging into your skin.
“you f-feel so—shit—so tight, baby, i’m—” he choked on his words, his whole body trembling as he buried himself as deep as he could, letting out a broken whimper.
the second he spilled inside you, he groaned, his body collapsing against yours, completely spent. his breath was hot against your neck, his arms still wrapped tightly around you like he never wanted to let go.
jake was still panting, his chest rising and falling against yours, his body completely hot, damp with sweat.
“shit…” he let out a shaky breath, still buried inside you, his body jerking slightly every time he shifted. he was sensitive, too sensitive, but he wouldn’t pull away. “you feel so good…” he murmured, voice weak, breathless. “so fuckin’ perfect, baby.”
the bed still creaked beneath you, both of your bodies slick with sweat, sticking to the sheets. jake groaned when you shifted even a little, his hands gripping your hips tighter. “d-don’t move..” he whined, voice barely holding together. “i’m too..fuck—too sensitive.”
his head fell against your shoulder, his lips brushing against your skin as he sucked in a deep breath. “you okay?” he mumbled, fingers tracing circles on your hip, still twitching from how hard he came.
when you nodded, his grip loosened just a little, but he still wouldn’t pull away. “i don’t wanna move..” he admitted, voice muffled against your skin. “wanna stay like this… keep you full.”
you traced your fingers along his back, feeling the way his muscles twitched under your touch. “you really meant it?” you whispered. “about the baby?”
jake lifted his head just enough to look at you, his eyes half-lidded, still dazed. “of course, i meant it.” he murmured. “i want it so bad, baby. wanna see you all round with my kid.” his voice cracked slightly, his hands sliding up your sides, as if he was trying to memorize the way you felt right now. “you’ll be so fucking pretty… carrying my baby.”
your breath hitched, your legs instinctively tightening around him. “jake…”
his lips ghosted over yours, his voice barely above a whisper. “say you want it too..” he pleaded. “tell me you’ll give me a baby.”
you swallowed, heart racing. “i want it..” you admitted softly. “i want everything with you.”
jake let out a shaky breath, his hands trembling where they held you. “fuck..” he whined, pressing his forehead against yours. “i love you so much. i swear, baby, i’ll take care of you.”
you smiled slightly, brushing your thumb against his cheek. “you better.”
he chuckled breathlessly, his lips pressing against yours in a slow, desperate kiss. “i will…” he promised. “forever.”
synopsis | where sunghoon finds himself unexpectedly jealous of a giant jellycat bunny. feeling ignored by the giant bunny, decides to give you something else to be entertained by: himself.
pairing | boyfriend!sunghoon x fem!reader
genre | established relationship, smut
warnings | pussy eating + fingering + nicknames + messy sex + no mention of protection.
sunghoon didn’t think it through. at the time, it seemed like a cute idea—he knew how much you loved plushies, and the way your face lit up when you saw the giant jellycat bunny was totally worth it. but now? now that stupid thing had basically replaced him.
every time he came over, it was there. taking up space on your bed, always by your side, like some oversized third wheel. you’d hug it at night, bury your face into it, and sunghoon would just sit there, arms crossed, watching you get all cozy with a stuffed animal instead of him.
he’d tried to reason with you. maybe put it in the corner or something, he suggested once, already knowing you’d ignore him. and, of course, you did. the bunny wasn’t going anywhere.
that’s when it started bothering him more than it should. he’d lie next to you, barely getting any space, watching as you clung to that thing like it was the best thing in the world. and yeah, it was stupid to be jealous over a plushie, but here he was, glaring at the bunny like it personally offended him.
sunghoon sat at the edge of your bed, staring at the ridiculous plush like it had personally wronged him. it was stupid—he knew that. but the way you were practically draped over it, using its leg as a pillow while you scrolled through your phone, just pissed him off for no reason.
“that thing takes up half your bed” he muttered, eyeing it like it might move just to spite him.
you hummed in response, barely glancing up. “mhm. it’s comfy.”
sunghoon scoffed, running a hand through his hair. “you have a whole boyfriend, and you’re cuddling that.”
you finally looked up at him, your lips curving into a knowing smile. “are you jealous of a stuffed animal?”
sunghoon stiffened, the edge of his mouth twitching. “no.” he said quickly, maybe a little too quickly. but it was stupid, right? getting worked up over a plushie. still, he couldn’t help it. it felt like you were hugging it more than him these days.
sunghoon shifted uncomfortably, watching as you giggled, completely absorbed in your phone. it had been minutes since he arrived, and you hadn’t even looked up. the bunny had fully claimed your attention, and he was just… there.
before all this, he used to be the one you’d curl up with at night, the one you’d lay on after a long day, but now it was that stupid bunny.
he exhaled sharply, trying to push the feeling down. he wasn’t about to make a big deal out of it, but it did feel a little ridiculous. slowly, he slid onto the bed next to you, leaning back against the headboard with his arms still crossed.
“so..” he started casually “you planning on giving me any attention today, or should i just get comfy next to… mr. bunny over here?” sunghoon leaned in slightly, his voice softer now, a hint of playful irritation. “princess, you’re really going to make me fight with a stuffed animal for your attention?”
sunghoon watched as you slowly put your phone away, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips when you crawled into his lap. he raised an eyebrow, but before he could say anything, you leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to his nose.
“is this better?” you asked, your voice playful but soft.
before you could tease him, he tilted his head, closing the distance between you in one smooth motion. his lips brushed against yours, properly, slow, warm, and just a little bit teasing.
his other hand found its way to your jaw, thumb tracing the curve of your cheek. he hummed against your lips, a low sound of satisfaction, as you curled your fingers into the fabric of his hoodie.
his kiss deepened, his tongue gently brushing against your bottom lip, asking for more. and when you opened to him, he took it as an invitation. you responded just as eagerly, your hands gripping the back of his hoodie tighter as his tongue traced the inside of your mouth, pushing you further into the kiss.
The subtle grind of your hips against his didn’t go unnoticed. sunghoon’s breath hitched, and his grip on your waist tightened, a low groan escaping him as he shifted to meet the movement. your body moved against his in a slow, feeling him harden beneath you. the kiss became all-consuming, hot and messy.
"you know.." he murmured, his voice low and husky. his lips found your neck, trailing hot kisses along your skin. you shivered, tilting your head to give him better access. “why don't we give your little friend a show?"
his hands roamed your body, and as your clothes fell away, sunghoon turned you abruptly over onto your stomach. you felt the soft fur of the giant bunny plushie beneath you.
"face down." sunghoon commanded as he swatted his hand against your ass, the sound of it ringing through the room. you let out a whine, burying your face into the plush belly of the stuffed animal.
his hands trailed down your back, fingers tracing the curve of your spine. he leaned over you, his breath hot against your neck as he pressed soft kisses along your shoulder. you shivered, face still buried in the plush bunny's fur.
“look at you" sunghoon murmured, his hot breath tickled the back of your neck as he pressed himself against you, his hardness evident through his pants. "so beautiful."
he gripped your hips firmly, his fingers digging into your flesh as he slowly grinded against you. "you like that, don't you?" he murmured, his voice low and husky. "feeling me, all hard and ready for you." his hand sliding down your belly to cup your mound through your panties. he rubbed gently, applying just enough pressure to make you squirm. “tell me what you want, baby," he whispered, his lips brushing against your ear. "tell me how you want me to fuck you."
you arched your back, eliciting a soft moan from your lips. Your breath hitched as his fingers traced the outline of your lips through the thin fabric of your panties. “please.." you gasped, your voice trembling with need.
sunghoon growled low in his throat, his fingers hooking into the waistband of your panties. he pulled them down slowly, his knuckles brushing against your sensitive skin.
his hands moved to his belt, the metal buckle clinking loudly as he undid it. he slid the leather strap through the loops of his pants, the sound echoing in the room. you watched over your shoulder as he unbuttoned his jeans, slowly pulling down the zipper. he pushed his pants down his hips, revealing his the waistband of his boxers.
you could see the outline of his erection straining against the fabric, the tip damp with pre-cum. he hooked his thumbs into the elastic, pulling his boxers down inch by inch. his cock sprang free, thick and hard, the head glistening in the dim light. he gripped himself at the base, giving his shaft a few slow pumps. then, with a wicked grin, he pressed the tip against your entrance, rubbing it up and down your slit.
you moaned loudly, your hips bucking back against him as he teased you with the tip of his cock. "that’s it, baby," he encouraged, one hand sliding up to tangle in your hair. "let me hear you." sunghoon chuckled, as he continued his slow torture, circling your entrance with his tip but refusing to push inside.
your moans grew louder, more desperate and just when you thought you might explode from frustration, he finally gave you what you craved.
with a smooth thrust, sunghoon entered you, filling you completely. your fingers clutched at the bunny's fur as pleasure coursed through your body. "fuck…” sunghoon growled, his voice thick with lust. "you feel so good, baby. so tight and wet for me."
the giant bunny plushie beneath you shifted with each thrust, its soft fur tickling your bare skin. you clutched at its ears, muffling your moans against its plush body.
you lift your head, meeting the bunny's innocent button eyes. the contrast between its cute appearance and the lewd acts being performed around it only heightened your arousal. you gripped its ears tightly, rolling your eyes when you felt his hands sliding up to grab your breasts. he squeezed them roughly, pinching your nipples between his fingers.
“shit, your pussy is gripping me so tight.” sunghoon panted, his hips moving at a frantic pace now. “im gonna fill you up, baby.”
"im gonna cum" you whine and he leaned over you, his muscular chest pressing against your back as he pounded into you mercilessly.
"come for me, baby” he commanded, his voice a low, seductive growl. the bunny plushie beneath you bounced wildly, its stuffing shifting with each aggressively thrust. tears streamed down your face as you cried out in a mix of pain and pleasure.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" you sobbed, your nails digging into the bunny's fur.
with a final, deep thrust, Sunghoon buried himself deep inside you. but Sunghoon didn't stop. he gripped your hips tightly, flipping you onto your back. before you could catch your breath, he buried his face between your legs, his tongue delving into your dripping core.
“oh god” you gasped, your body arching off the bed.
sunghoon’s tongue delved into your folds, lapping at your juices like a man starved. He sucked on your clit, his fingers pumping in and out of your soaked entrance.
your legs trembled as he pushed you towards another orgasm.
“sunghoon, please..” you begged, your voice breaking. "I need...I need..."
he knew exactly what you needed. with a final, hard suck on your clit, he pushed you over the edge. you came undone, your body convulsing as waves of pleasure crashed over you. sunghoon didn't stop, his tongue and fingers working you through your orgasm until you were a sobbing, shaking mess beneath him. "that’s it, baby” he murmured, kissing his way up your body.
But he wasn't done with you yet.
sunghoon crawled up your body, his lips trailing kisses along your collarbone and neck. he captured your mouth in a searing kiss, his tongue sliding against yours, letting you taste yourself on him. you moaned into the kiss, your hands gripping his shoulders tightly. he settled between your legs, his hard dick pressing against you again. you gasped, breaking the kiss to look up at him with hooded eyes.
"sunghoon, I don't know if I can..." you started, but he silenced you with another kiss.
"I'll be gentle," he murmured against your lips. slowly, carefully, he entered you, giving you time to adjust to his size. you whimpered, your nails digging into his back as he filled you completely.
he began to move, his thrusts long and deep, hitting that sweet spot inside you with each pass. you legs wrapped around his waist, urging him deeper, faster.
sunghoon's piercing gaze locked onto yours, his intense stare sending shivers down your spine. his sharp jawline was clenched, a thin sheen of sweat glistening on his pale skin as he moved above you. you couldn't help but admire the way his biceps flexed with each thrust.
his dark hair was messy, falling across his forehead, and his full lips were parted as he panted with exertion. but it was his eyes that held you captive - the way they burned with desire, the way they drank in every inch of your body as if committing it to memory.
"you're so fucking gorgeous," he moaned. "I could spend hours just looking at you."
sunghoon's thrusts slowed, he leaned down, capturing your lips in a slow, sensual kiss. his breathing grew heavier, his thrusts becoming more erratic.
“fuck, baby..” he gasped, breaking the kiss. "im gonna cum. im gonna fill you up so fucking deep." he buried his face in the crook of your neck, his hot breath fanning across your skin. his hips snapped forward, driving into you with a final, deep thrust. you felt him pulse inside you as he reached his peak, his release warm and thick as it spilled inside of you.
sunghoon collapsed on top of you, his body heavy and spent. he panted heavily, his face buried in the crook of your neck. he rolled off you, flopping onto his back beside you. He threw an arm over his eyes, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he caught his breath.
you lay there, a trembling, satisfied mess. your hair was a wild tangle, sticking to your sweat-dampened forehead. your lips were swollen and bruised from sunghoon’s kisses, your neck marked with hickeys. you looked utterly destroyed.
he reached out, gently brushing a strand of hair from your face.
“you okay?" he murmured, his voice filled with awe and tenderness. you nodded, snuggling against him.
"im perfect." you yawned, your eyelids growing heavy. sunghoon tightened his hold on you, his hand continuing its gentle caress.
his gaze drifted to the bunny, a small smirk played on his lips as his mind raced with dirty thoughts. he pictured you, naked and alone, grinding against the bunny plushie, your hands exploring your body as you pleasured yourself. he imagined the way your breasts would bounce, the sounds of your moans filling the room. he felt his cock stirring again at the thought, eager for more.
“what are you thinking about?" you asked, noticing his distant gaze and the growing bulge in his lap. he snapped back to reality, a smirk spreading across his face.
synopsis | when heeseung returns from a party, he’s met with the shocking sight of his furious girlfriend tossing his belongings out the window and locking him out of the house. caught in the middle of a heated argument, the two find themselves pushing each other’s buttons, testing patience and limits as frustration and love clash in a chaotic standoff.
you and heeseung had been together for two years, and while there were plenty of good moments, the bad ones seemed to creep in more often lately. the fights were becoming a regular thing, especially on the afternoons after he came back from parties. he’d spend hours at a friend’s place, leaving you at home, overthinking and imagining the worst. he’d stopped inviting you to these big gatherings, and it was hard not to wonder if he was cheating. the thought of him with someone else, while you were lying awake trying to convince yourself it wasn’t true, was eating you alive.
then today, everything you feared felt real. you got pictures of him at a party, grinning at some blonde girl—the same grin that used to be just for you.
heeseung didn’t see himself as a cheater. in his mind, he was just being “nice,” brushing off the attention he got because of his looks. but that smile, the one he flashed at other girls, made you want to punch him in the face.
it was around 3:20 in the afternoon when heeseung pulled into the driveway, still half-drunk and barely focused on the road. all he could think about was crashing into bed—probably not with you since he already expected a fight. not that it mattered to him; you’d forgive him eventually. or so he thought.
he didn’t even get the chance to park properly when he spotted you through the window. without thinking, he jumped out of the car, his eyes scanning the scene. clothes were scattered all over the grass, and then, just as he stepped closer, a pair of jeans flew out the window, landing in a messy heap.
“what are you doing?” heeseung asked, his eyes flicking between the clothes scattered on the ground and your furious figure at the window. “are those my clothes?”
you didn’t bother answering. instead, you grabbed a shoe and hurled it at him, hitting him square in the head.
“baby, what the hell?” heeseung muttered, trying to dodge the rain of items falling from the window. he knelt down, quickly stuffing clothes into his arms, but it felt like no matter how much he picked up, more kept falling.
“grab your stuff and get out of here.” you said, and tossed a pair of jeans at him.
heeseung caught them mid-air and looked down. “are those my favorites?” he asked, still not fully understanding what was happening.
he then glanced around, noticing people from the neighborhood walking by and stopping to watch. he could feel the eyes on him, making the situation even more awkward.
heeseung was completely thrown off guard. he didn’t understand what was happening. it didn’t make sense to him.
“can you just—” he started, but the words got stuck. “what’s going on?” he looked up at you again, trying to find some clue in your expression, but you just stood there, arms crossed, staring at him coldly.
heeseung sighed heavily, running a hand through his messy hair as he stood there, surrounded by his stuff scattered all over the grass. his headache was getting worse, and your angry expression through the window wasn’t making it any better.
“y/n, can we just talk like adults?” he pleaded, trying to calm the situation down.
“adults?” you snapped, leaning out the window with a glare. “were you acting like an adult when you were grinning at that blonde all night?”
heeseung’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. his mind went back to the party last night, and after a few seconds, his eyes widened as it hit him what this was all about. “you’ve got it all wrong—”
“wrong?!” you interrupted, your voice trembling with anger. “what part of you smirking at her, leaning in all close, and god knows what else am i getting wrong?!”
“she was just talking to me! i wasn’t doing anything!” heeseung argued, waving his hands in a dismissive gesture. “you always overthink this stuff. it’s exhausting!”
“oh, i’m exhausting?!” you yelled, throwing a sweatshirt at him with force. “you know what’s exhausting, heeseung? sitting here, while the guy i’ve been with for two years goes around dipping his dick in any female that flashes him a smile!”
heeseung’s eyes widened, and he snapped back, his voice rising. “are you serious right now? i wasn’t fucking anyone, y/n! she was just talking to me! you’re blowing this way out of proportion!”
“talking?” you laughed bitterly, leaning further out the window. “heeseung, do you even hear yourself? do you think i’m stupid? you didn’t even bother inviting me to the party!”
heeseung threw his hands up in frustration. “y/n, it’s not what you think! i didn’t invite you because i knew you hate those parties!”
you clenched your fists at your sides, voice shaking with anger. “was it good, huh? was it good fucking that bitch while you had your actual girlfriend at home?”
heeseung’s eyes widened, completely caught off guard. “what the hell are you talking about?” he shot back, gripping the sneakers you threw at him. “i didn’t sleep with anyone!”
“stop lying!” you spat, leaning even further out the window, your anger boiling over.
“y/n..” he started, his voice getting more desperate. “you’re seriously out of your mind right now. i wasn’t doing anything! i didn’t touch her, i didn’t—”
“save it!” you interrupted, gripping the window frame to steady yourself.
heeseung dropped the pile of clothes back onto the grass and started walking toward the door, his face set with determination.
“don’t bother.” you said, a hint of satisfaction in your voice while holding up a shiny new set of keys. “i changed the handle.”
heeseung stopped in his tracks, looking at you, completely shocked. “why the fuck would you do that?” his eyes narrowing as he looked at the keys in your hand. his mind was still reeling from the argument, but now he was thrown off even more by what you just said.
you just smirked as you held up the keys. “you really thought you could just walk in here and keep doing whatever you want?”
heeseung’s jaw clenched, and he dragged his tongue across his cheek, clearly trying to keep his temper in check. both hands rested on his hips as he glared at you. “so, this is how it’s gonna be now? you’re locking me out like some stranger?” he was furious—this whole situation felt ridiculous to him. “you really think a locked door is gonna stop me?”
you rolled your eyes, leaning against the frame. “what are you gonna do, heeseung? break a window? crawl through the vents?”
he chuckled darkly. “did you change the back door too?”
your face went pale. you hadn’t. and even though you could’ve lied, you knew he wouldn’t buy it—your hesitation was clear. you watched his eyes flick to the side of the house, and then it clicked. before you could react, heeseung was already walking toward the edge of the house, that knowing smirk spreading across his face.
“gotcha.”
panic set in, and you pushed off the window frame, clutching the keys tightly in your hand. “this motherfucker..” you muttered under your breath.
heeseung took off running toward the backyard, vaulting over the fence with ease. panicking, you bolted down the stairs, nearly tripping as you tried to beat him to the door.
you hated yourself for how dumb you’d been, but even more, you hated the fact that heeseung was actually pretty smart. too smart. and the worst part? he wasn’t wrong. as much as you wanted to blame him for being insufferable, you couldn’t deny it was your own slip-up that handed him the upper hand. again.
you cursed under your breath, skidding to a halt in front of the door just in time to see heeseung standing in the frame, his tall figure all over you. his smirk was insufferable as he leaned against the door, looking down at you with a cocky expression.
you gasped, turning on your heels and sprinting back toward the stairs. “i hate you!” you shouted as heeseung darted after you, his long strides closing the distance quickly.
“i know you don’t, princess!” he called out, laughing as he chased you up the stairs.
your heart raced as you reached the top, your mind scrambling for a plan. heeseung wasn’t about to let this go, and you weren’t ready to give in just yet. you slammed the door of the bedroom, hoping to lock it before heeseung reached you. but just as it was about to close, his foot wedged itself in the gap.
“leave me alone!” you yelled, your voice desperate as you pushed against the door with all your strength.
“not a chance.” heeseung growled, using his weight to push it open.
the door flew back, forcing you to stumble a few steps away. before you could react, heeseung grabbed your wrist, his grip firm but not painful.
“let me go!” you shouted, twisting and squirming in his hold, trying to free yourself.
“stop it, y/n!” he barked, his voice low and steady, though his breathing was heavy from the chase. “you’re acting like a kid.” heeseung’s grip tightened for a second, but he didn’t pull you back. his gaze softened just a little, and his voice dropped. “baby, stop. i’m just trying to talk.”
but you weren’t ready to listen. you were too angry. “i don’t care what you’re trying to do.” you snapped, pushing against his chest. “you don’t get to act like nothing’s wrong when you’re out there doing god knows what with other girls.”
heeseung couldn’t help but let out a small laugh, the tension in his body easing slightly. “i didn’t do anything, baby. it was just a stupid conversation—nothing more.”
“bullshit!” you yelled, shoving against him harder, but all it did was make him chuckle. “why are you laughing? you think this is funny?”
“i’m not..” he said, his smile only growing wider. “it’s just funny how you get like this, all grumpy.” he reached out and pinched your nose, a playful gesture that only made you more frustrated.
you swatted his hand away, glaring at him. “this isn’t funny, heeseung!” you snapped, your voice sharp with annoyance.
he raised his hands in mock surrender, still smirking. “okay, okay. i get it. but you’re overreacting, baby.” his tone was teasing, but there was an underlying seriousness in his eyes. “i’m not doing anything wrong.”
“you always say that,” you shot back, your anger flaring again. “how am i supposed to believe you?”
“listen, i don’t know who sent you that picture, but i swear, princess, i wasn’t flirting with her.” he stepped closer, gently tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “you can ask my friends.”
you scoffed, crossing your arms. “i don’t trust your friends.”
he raised an eyebrow, his tone calm but firm. “you trust jungwon though. he was there.”
the mention of jungwon made you pause for a moment. jungwon was the calm one in the group, always reliable, and someone you could count on when it came to keeping things straight. but the one you should really keep an eye on was no one but jake. he was the king of stirring up trouble, and you couldn’t count the number of times he’d egged heeseung on to do something stupid.
your silence gave heeseung an opening. he softened his voice, stepping closer, but still keeping a little distance to test the waters. “look, i get it. i screwed up, and yeah, maybe i should’ve kept my distance from her. but you know me, baby. you know me. i don’t care about anyone else.”
you rolled your eyes, though your resolve was faltering slightly. “you’re always sweet-talking your way out of this stuff, heeseung. it doesn’t change the fact that you were grinning at her like she was the most interesting person in the world.”
“sweet-talking?” he repeated, a playful smirk creeping back onto his face. “baby, i don’t need to sweet-talk. i’m just telling you the truth.”
heeseung took another step forward, and this time you didn’t move back. he reached for your hands, holding them gently in his. his thumbs brushed against your knuckles in slow, soothing circles.
“i don’t want to fight with you anymore..” he said softly, his voice steady and earnest. “you’re the one i come home to. you’re the one i care about. that’s not going to change because of some random girl at a party.”
you crossed your arms, raising an eyebrow. “i’ll forgive you… only if you stop going to these stupid parties. and definitely not hang out when jake’s around.”
heeseung nodded quickly, a look of relief washing over his face. “i promise, no more parties like that. and no more hanging around jake if it’s going to make you this upset.”
you felt his hands gently grip your waist, but you didn’t pull away. instead, you looked him in the eyes, studying his expression. “i mean it, heeseung. i don’t care how much fun you think you’re having. if i ever catch you doing something like that again—”
“you won’t.” he cut in and gave you a reassuring squeeze. “no more parties, no more drama, just us.”
you let out a small sigh, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders. “good. that’s what i need to hear.”
you let him pull you into a hug, though you kept your arms at your sides, still not fully giving in. he pressed his chin against the top of your head, his voice soft as he muttered, “thank you, baby. i’m glad we’re on the same page now.”
you stayed there for a moment, both of you just breathing, when suddenly he froze, his expression shifting. “wait—” he said, looking toward the window. “the clothes.”
you followed his gaze, realizing he was just now remembering the mess outside. before you could say anything, he groaned and buried his face in his hands. “god, the neighbors must think we’re insane.”
you crossed your arms, smirking. “well, we kinda are.”
heeseung turned back to you with a playful pout. “can’t believe i almost lost my future wife and my home in one day.”
your cheeks burned at his words, but you refused to let him off that easy. “future wife?” you repeated, raising an eyebrow. “who said i’d marry you after this?”
he grinned, stepping closer and wrapping his arms around you again. “you’ll forgive me.” he said confidently. “you love me too much.”
you rolled your eyes but couldn’t help the small smile tugging at your lips. “you better start picking up those clothes before i change my mind.”
heeseung groaned dramatically, dropping his head onto your shoulder. “can’t we just leave them there? maybe the wind will blow them away or something.”
you pushed him off with a light shove, crossing your arms. “nice try. i’m not going to be the one explaining to the neighbour why your underwear is hanging from her tree.”
heeseung winced at the thought, rubbing the back of his neck. “fine, fine. but you’re helping me. you threw them out, after all.”
you raised an eyebrow, leaning against the doorframe. “oh no, this is all on you, mister. think of it as your punishment.”
he sighed, giving you a mock glare before turning toward the stairs. “you’re cruel, y/n. absolutely ruthless.”
“and don’t forget it.” you shot back, following him downstairs to the front yard.
the scene outside was somehow even more chaotic than you remembered. a couple of kids from down the street were pointing and giggling as they passed by, and neighbour from next door was giving heeseung a very disapproving look from his porch.
“great.” heeseung muttered under his breath, bending down to pick up a pair of socks. “i’m the neighborhood clown now.”
you couldn’t help but laugh as you watched him gather his clothes, his tall frame awkwardly hunched as he tried to scoop up as much as he could at once. “well, you kind of earned it.” you teased, leaning against the fence.
heeseung straightened up, his arms full of crumpled t-shirts and jeans. “yeah, yeah. laugh it up. just wait until i get back inside.”
you tilted your head, smirking. “oh? and what are you going to do? throw all your clothes back out?”
he flashed you a grin, the kind that made your stomach flip despite everything. “nah. i’ll just make you fold all of them.”
you rolled your eyes, but a small smile crept onto your face. “dream on, heeseung.”
he chuckled, shaking his head as he bent down to grab the last of his things. as much as you wanted to stay mad at him, moments like this reminded you why you’d stuck around for two years. heeseung was frustrating, infuriating even, but he was also the guy who could make you laugh when you least expected it.
as he stood up, arms overflowing with clothes, he looked over at you with a sheepish smile. “uh, a little help?”
you sighed, walking over to take some of the load off his hands. “you’re lucky i don’t actually hate you.”
heeseung’s grin widened as he leaned down to press a quick kiss to your cheek. “and i’m lucky you’re still here.”
you woke up in the middle of the night, your eyes wide open, and your belly stretching your shirt as your pregnancy bump stuck out prominently. you inhaled deeply, exhaling slowly through your nose. then it hit you. a craving. not just any craving, but the kind that gnawed at your stomach and made your mouth water instantly. you swallowed, already knowing exactly what you wanted. the meal jake had brought home from the convenience store a few days ago. you could picture it so clearly that it almost made you groan.
turning your head, you looked at jake. he was lying on his stomach, face half-buried in his pillow, breathing steady and deep. completely knocked out. the sleeping pills had hit him hard, and you weren’t surprised. work had been hell for him lately. his boss had been piling on extra tasks, keeping him late almost every night, and when he finally got home, he was too drained to do much besides eat and collapse into bed. he hadn’t been mean to you or anything, but he wasn’t the same either. just… tired. distant in a way you couldn’t blame him for.
you’d been together since high school, and the relationship had endured a lot—college, stress, and now an unexpected pregnancy. dropping out to prepare for the baby wasn’t in your plans, but it had happened. jake started taking extra shifts to support both of you. life wasn’t easy and right now you didn’t want to wake him knowing how tired he must be, but the craving was growing stronger by the second. you hesitated before gently touching his back.
“jake?” you whispered, your voice barely above a breath. you shifted slightly, pressing your palm against his back and giving him a small nudge. “jake?”
at first, nothing. then, after a few seconds, he let out a low, irritated groan and turned onto his side, blinking at you through heavy, half-lidded eyes. his hair was messy, strands sticking out in different directions, and his face was puffy from sleep. he stared at you for a moment, clearly trying to process why you had woken him up.
“what?” his voice was rough, groggy. he was exhausted, and it showed in the sluggish way he blinked and the deep crease between his brows.
you hesitated, swallowing before giving him a small, sheepish smile. “i know you were sleeping, but… can you do me a favor?”
jake sighed, already looking annoyed. he exhaled slowly through his nose, rubbing his face. “you’re craving something, aren’t you?” his voice was still thick with sleep, but the exasperation was obvious.
“maybe.” you fidgeted with your fingers, glancing away for a second before looking back at him. “that meal we had on friday… from the convenience store. could you—”
“y/n.” his tone was flat, and he cut you off before you could finish. he rubbed his face again, this time with both hands, before dropping them onto the bed. “do you know what time it is?” he squinted at the nightstand, reaching blindly for his phone and bringing it up to check the time. whatever he saw made him shake his head as he let the phone drop onto the mattress.
“i know..” you said quickly, shifting closer, “but i really want it.” your voice was softer now, more coaxing. you reached out, brushing your fingers against his arm in a way that usually worked when you wanted something. “please?”
jake stared at the ceiling for a second before grabbing the blanket and pulling it over his head. “give me an hour.” he muttered, his voice muffled under the fabric. “i’ll get it then.”
you stared at the shape of him under the blanket, your fingers curling into the bedsheet. normally, he’d give in with just a little more convincing, but tonight, he seemed determined to ignore you. you couldn’t wait an hour, though. your stomach was twisting with the craving, your body practically demanding that you get what you wanted now.
you scooted closer, resting your hand lightly on his arm before tugging gently at the blanket. “jake—”
suddenly, the blanket was thrown off, and jake sat up so fast that it startled you.
“oh my god!” his voice was loud, completely cutting you off and tensing body. “couldn’t you wait one fucking hour?” he snapped, glaring at you with tired, bloodshot eyes. “jesus christ, y/n, i’m so sick of these dumb cravings!”
his tone, the way he just threw those words at you, felt like a punch to the gut. you blinked, trying to process it and stared at him, mouth slightly open.
he threw the blanket off completely and swung his legs over the side of the bed, standing up. the room was dark, but you could still see as he stormed toward the closet. he yanked the door open, the hinges creaking loudly, and grabbed a jacket. the hanger clattered to the floor as he pulled it off roughly, but he didn’t bother picking it up.
you watched, frozen, as he moved to the nightstand, pulling open the drawer hard enough that it rattled. he grabbed his wallet and keys, shoving them into his pocket.
“jake…?” you said, your voice trembling a bit, hoping for some kind of reaction..
he didn’t look at you. didn’t say anything. the door creaked open, and you caught a glimpse of him walking out without saying a word. the door slammed behind him with enough force to make the walls tremble.
you sat there for a moment, your lips trembling.
jake had never spoken to you like that before. never raised his voice at you like that, not even during your worst fights.
slowly, you let out a breath, sinking back against the pillows. your hand drifted to your belly, resting there lightly. with your other hand, you wiped at your face, realizing too late that a tear had slipped down your cheek.
normally, no matter how annoyed or exhausted he was, jake would at least press a kiss to your forehead before leaving.
tonight, he hadn’t even looked back.
the craving that had felt so overwhelming just minutes ago was the last thing on your mind now.
jake pulled into the driveway, the engine of the car shutting off with a quiet click. he sat there for a few seconds, staring at the steering wheel, his grip tight around it. the bag of food sat on the passenger seat, the faint smell of fast food drifting in the air. he didn’t get out right away. instead, he leaned back in his seat, rubbing his eyes and letting out a long, tired sigh.
he felt like shit. he knew he shouldn’t have snapped at you. he could still feel the weight of his words, the way they’d hit you. he was exhausted, no question about it, but that didn’t excuse it. he knew that. you didn’t deserve it.
he let out a long sigh, the kind that felt like it came from deep in his chest, and reached over to grab the bag of food sitting on the passenger seat. finally, he swung open the door, and walked toward the house. when he reached the bedroom, he opened the door quietly, expecting to find you there, maybe half-expecting you to step out from somewhere, but the bed was empty. That’s when his eyes caught the faint light coming from under the bathroom door.
then glanced around. the faint light from under the bathroom door caught his eye. he took a step toward it, and that’s when he heard it. a quiet sniffle.
he set the bag of food down on the dresser, his movements slow as he approached the door. he rested his hand on the cool wood, hesitating before he spoke.
“baby?” he called softly. “i got the food.” there was no answer, just another soft sniffle and his throat tightened. “baby, are you crying?” he asked, his voice wavering. he hated hearing you like this. he hated knowing it was because of him.
still, no answer.
“i’m sorry..” he added quickly. “please, just open the door.”
he pressed his forehead against the door, feeling the cold surface against his skin. his hand slid down to rest flat against it, feeling the pulse in his fingertips. guilt started to eat at him, and he closed his eyes for a second, trying to breathe through it.
the crying on the other side didn’t stop. if anything, it grew shakier. jake could hear your breaths coming in short, uneven gasps, and it sent a wave of panic through him.
“honey, please open up.” he repeated, this time jiggling the handle. “i don’t want you to get hurt. please, talk to me.”
the doctor’s warning rang in his head.
“stress isn’t good for her or the baby.”
jake felt like he’d failed you in the worst way possible.
“y/n, please” he pleaded, his voice barely above a whisper.. “i know i messed up, but please just let me in so i can fix this.”
he leaned his head against the door again, closing his eyes, listening for any sign of movement from you.
finally, jake heard the soft click of the lock. he stepped back, watching the door crack open just enough for him to see you standing there. your eyes were red and swollen from crying, and your cheeks were streaked with tears. he felt a sharp pang of guilt in his chest.
without waiting, jake stepped forward quickly, his arms wrapping around you, pulling you close. you didn’t resist, but you kept crying, your sobs shaking your whole body.
“i’m so fucking sorry,” jake whispered into your hair, his voice low and full of regret. he ran his fingers through your hair, his hand trembling slightly. “i was stressed, okay? i didn’t mean to snap. i swear, it won’t happen again.” he pulled back a bit, cupping your face with both hands, looking into your eyes, trying to make you see how sorry he was. “please, don’t cry.”
jake’s heart ached seeing you like this. the tears on your face, the way you looked so vulnerable, made him feel even worse.
he gently cupped your face, his thumb tracing your cheek, wiping away your tears.
“say something.” his voice was soft, almost pleading. “i can’t stand seeing you like this.”
you shook your head, looking away from him, your face a mess of tears. “i’m so fucking ugly.” you whispered through the sobs, barely able to get the words out.
“why would you say that?” his voice was softer, quieter. “you’re not ugly. you’re beautiful. always have been.”
“i look like this.” you gasped between sobs. “and that’s why you’ve been so distant.”
jake felt a sick twist in his stomach. he didn’t know how to respond to that, how to make you understand. “no.” he said quickly, shaking his head. “no, that’s not it at all. I’ve been stressed. it’s not about you.” he reached down to lift your chin, trying to make you meet his gaze. “it has nothing to do with you, baby.”
you took a deep, shaky breath, trying to calm yourself down but struggling. “i look like this… my body’s changing, and you don’t look at me the same anymore,” you said, your voice raw and thick with emotion. “you’ve been distant, right? because i’m not the same.”
jake’s chest tightened. he didn’t know how to fix this. for a moment, he was lost for words, then he wiped more tears from your face, his hand trembling slightly. “y/n, you’re not ugly. you’re carrying our baby. you’re doing something fucking incredible. i’ve been distant, but it’s not because of you. it’s me. i’ve been dealing with my own shit.”
but then you whispered, your voice cracking, “but you said you were tired of—
“i didn’t mean that.” he quickly cut you off. “i was pissed and said those things. i didn’t mean any of it. i swear to god, i’m not tired of you or anything like that. i love you, okay? don’t ever think you’re not enough.”
he kissed your forehead, his lips lingering there for a second as he closed his eyes.
you took a shaky breath, wiping your nose with the back of your hand. your voice was shaky as you spoke, barely above a whisper. “i just wanted something to eat. i didn’t want to bother you. i knew you were tired. but the craving was so strong, and i didn’t know what else to do.”
jake’s face softened when he heard that. you could feel his fingers pressing gently into your skin, and it felt good—soothing, even though everything felt fucked up.
“i know, baby. i know.” jake murmured, his hand rubbing your back in slow, steady circles. “i should’ve been more patient. i should’ve understood. i didn’t mean to make everything worse.”
Jake’s expression softened at your words, and he pulled you closer, his hand gently rubbing your back. “I know, baby. I know.” he whispered, his voice full of regret. “I should’ve been more patient, I should’ve understood. I didn’t mean to make things worse.”
you stayed in his arms, your face pressed against his neck, the warmth of his skin grounding you. you closed your eyes for a moment, just breathing him in.
before the pregnancy, you loved how his cologne would mix with his scent, but now, with the nausea and everything, the smell made your stomach turn. you’d have to hold your breath or leave the room.
jake noticed that, though, so he started wearing cologne only in the car before work, not letting it stick around you. now, with the cologne gone, you just smelled him, his natural scent.
his hand paused for a second as he gently rubbed your back, almost like he was trying to make sure you were okay. “feeling a little better now?” he asked, his voice soft but steady.
you nodded against his neck, not ready to move away just yet.
“do you still wanna eat?” jake asked, his voice light, like he was trying to make things feel normal again.
you nodded again, still not pulling away from him.
jake chuckled, a low sound that was almost like a sigh of relief. it was the first time tonight you’d heard him sound anything but tense. “alright.” he said, brushing a hand through your hair, his fingers light against your scalp. “let’s eat, then.”
jake grabbed the bag of food with one hand, reaching for yours with the other. he didn’t say anything, just gently led you downstairs.
the house was quiet except for the faint hum of the fridge in the kitchen. jake pulled out a chair for you, setting the bag down on the table before unpacking the food.
“here it is.” he muttered, placing the container in front of you. “still warm.”
“thank you.” you mumbled, wiping your nose quickly with the back of your hand. jake sat next to you, watching closely as you opened the food. he didn’t say anything, just waited for you to dig in. you tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear and took your first bite, a soft sigh escaping your lips. “want some?” you asked, offering him a piece.
he shook his head with a small smile, the kind that didn’t really reach his eyes. “nah, it’s all yours.”
jake leaned back in his chair, arms crossed over his chest, watching you eat. his eyes didn’t leave you. he couldn’t help it.
his head kept replaying your words. how you felt ugly, how you thought he was pulling away because of it. he couldn’t shake it. how could you think that? how could you feel so insecure, when to him, you were fucking perfect?
yeah, you’d gained some weight, but fuck, he thought it made you even more beautiful. he couldn’t stop thinking about it how sexy you looked. it wasn’t just about the pregnancy. it was how you were carrying their future, how your body was doing something incredible. it turned him on, and the thought of having you pregnant again, maybe one more time, crossed his mind more than once.
he smiled to himself, trying not to make it obvious he was zoning out. then you glanced up at him.
“what?” you asked.
“nothing.” he replied with a shrugged.
you started talking again, rambling about whatever was on your mind while eating. jake couldn’t help but watch you, the way you chewed and talked with your cheeks full. your hair was messy, some strands falling out of the bun you’d tied it in earlier. he found it kind of cute, the little things you did without even thinking about it. but then, as you took a sip of your drink, jake’s eyes followed your lips as they wrapped around the straw. fuck. his chest tightened, and he quickly bit his lip, forcing himself to look away.
it had been a while since you two had been intimate, and he didn’t want to make things uncomfortable. still, he couldn’t help but feel the attraction, even if it had been pushed aside for a while. jake couldn’t deny that sometimes he just wanted to have you underneath him again. feel your hands gripping the sheets while your body pressed against his. those thoughts came to him more often than he cared to admit, especially after a long day of work.
it was a feeling that came to him unexpectedly, even though he knew it wasn’t the right time. some nights, he’d come home frustrated, horny, just wanting to get it out of his system. but you’d already be asleep. and so, jake would sneak off to the bathroom, hoping for some kind of relief.
He hated the feeling of wanting you but not being able to do anything about it. So, instead of waking you, he’d sneak downstairs to the bathroom, hoping to get some relief on his own. As he did, all he could think about was how much he wished it was you touching him, the thought of your hands driving him crazy. But it was just him, alone.
you feel better now?” jake asked, clearing his throat as he pushed those thoughts aside. he tried to make his voice sound casual, leaning back in his chair. “you alright?”
you nodded, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand before finishing off your food. “yeah, much better. thanks for the food, jakey.”
jake smiled, relief settling in. “anytime, baby.” he reached over, giving your thigh a gentle squeeze. “if you need anything else, just let me know.”
the two of you moved upstairs, the house quiet except for the soft sound of your footsteps. once in the bedroom, jake pulled back the covers and gestured for you to get in first. he followed, pulling the blanket up over both of you. the room was dark except for the faint moonlight coming through the window. jake pulled you closer, his hand resting gently on your back.
“goodnight.” he murmured, his voice calm and warm.
“goodnight,” you replied, leaning closer and giving jake a quick peck on the lips. it was simple, but it felt right.
jake smiled softly, pulling you in a little closer, his hand settling on your waist. “i needed that.” he said quietly.
you smiled back, settling your back into him and letting the night take over.
as you drifted off to sleep, jake stayed awake behind you, spooning you with his arm wrapped around your waist. you shifted slightly, the soft movements in your sleep adding to his frustration. he felt himself getting hard in his pants, the feeling hitting him like a wave.
closing his eyes, he took deep, slow breaths, hoping the sensation would fade, but the image of you sucking that drink just moments ago didn’t make it any easier.
after a few more moments of trying to ignore it, jake carefully untangled himself from you and started to slide out of bed. his movements were slow and quiet, but they still stirred you awake. you blinked, your groggy eyes catching his silhouette as he quietly made his way toward the door.
“jake?” you murmured, your voice heavy with sleep.
he froze in the doorway, turning slightly toward you. “sorry, didn’t mean to wake you. go back to sleep.” he said, his voice low but strained.
you pushed yourself up on one elbow, your eyes narrowing slightly as you took in his body language. “you okay?”
jake hesitated for a moment, his hand resting on the doorframe. “yeah.” he said quickly, but it was clear from the way he stood that something was off. “just need a minute.”
you sat up fully now, your concern starting to push through the sleepiness. “what happened?”
jake sighed, running a hand through his hair. the frustration was evident in his face. “i’m hard, okay? i’m super hard.” he admitted, the words coming out in a quiet, exasperated whisper.
you blinked, half-surprised and half-amused. “are you gonna jerk off?” you asked, your tone more curious than judgmental.
he let out a dry laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. “yeah… i guess? i didn’t want to bother you, so i thought—”
you cut him off, raising an eyebrow. “you thought sneaking off to the bathroom was the best plan?”
jake shrugged, looking sheepish. “what else was i supposed to do?”
a small smirk tugged at your lips as you leaned back against the pillows. “you could’ve just woken me up, you know.”
jake’s lips parted as if to respond, but no words came out. he stood in the doorway, processing your suggestion.
“you’re serious?” he finally asked, his voice uncertain, his eyes scanning your face for any hint of sarcasm.
you tilted your head. “i wouldn’t have said it if i wasn’t.”
jake hesitated for a moment, his grip on the doorframe tightening. then, slowly, he turned back toward the bed.
you reached out, catching his wrist as he got closer. jake sat on the edge of the bed, watching you with this mix of uncertainty and need. his hands gripped your waist, pulling you into his lap, but he was still holding back, like he wasn’t sure if he should push things further.
“you sure about this?” he asked exhaled a shaky breath, his eyes meeting yours.
you nodded, leaning forward just enough to press a slow kiss to his lips. “i’m very sure.”
his hands moved, one sliding up your back, the other tracing down your side, pulling you closer. you shifted in his lap, feeling how hard he was under you. the friction made your breath catch for a moment, but you kept your gaze locked on his, watching his pupils dilate, his chest rising and falling as he tried to keep himself together.
“fuck, this isn’t gonna be easy.” he said, his voice rough with need.
you didn’t say anything in response, just kissed him harder, feeling him melt into it. his lips were rougher now, more urgent. you could tell he was holding back, trying to keep it slow, but you could see he was struggling to keep his control.
you broke the kiss briefly, your breathing uneven as you met his gaze. you slowly slide down jake's body, your fingers hooking into the waistband of his pants. his jaw clenched as you pulled them down.
“you’re gonna drive me insane.” he managed to say, as he let you take control. your hand moved, your fingers brushing against his hard cock beneath his boxers, earning a low, guttural groan from jake.
“let me take care of you.”
finally you pulled down his boxers, revealing him completely. his cock stood erect, straining towards you, and a bead of precum glistened at the tip. you wrapped your fingers around him, giving a slow stroke, and he let out a groaned. “fuck, baby, you see how you get me?” he muttered, his voice low and rough, filled with frustration and need.
you start to jerk him off slowly, your grip tight and steady.
“keep going, don't stop..." his words trail off into a moan as you pick up the pace, your thumb circling the sensitive tip of his cock.
feeling emboldened by his reactions, you lean in closer, your breath ghosting over his sensitive flesh. you part your lips and take him into your mouth, swirling your tongue around the head of his cock.
you bob your head, taking him deeper, your hand continuing to pump what you can't fit in your mouth.
“look at you.” he muttered, his fingers tangling in your hair.. “choking yourself on it like that.”
you pull back, letting his cock slip from your mouth with a wet pop, before taking him back into your mouth and starting all over again. jake’s eyes snap open.
your hands rested on his thighs for balance as you pushed yourself deeper, the sensation making your eyes water, but you didn’t stop. his hand cupped your jaw, his thumb brushing against your cheek as he watched you struggle to take him fully.
“fuck, baby. you’re so fucking good at this.” jake moaned, his head falling back for a moment before his eyes locked onto you again, his chest rising and falling heavily. seeing you there, kneeling, flushed and focused, only drove him insane. the thought of you carrying his baby again sent a fresh surge of arousal through him, making him harder than he thought was possible.
he missed this.
“you’re so beautiful. you don’t know what you do to me.” he muttered, his voice low and raw with emotion. “especially knowing you’re already carrying a part of me.”
tears pricked at the corners of your eyes as you pulled back slightly, gasping for air before diving back in, your tongue working against him with purpose. the sound of his breathing grew heavier, and his grip tightened on your hair as his hips bucked involuntarily.
you kept swallowing, the knot in your throat tightening. you could see the muscles and the way his hands gripped the edge of the bed. after that he let out a guttural groan, his body trembling with the intensity of release. he pulled back just in time, as he finished, his warm cum painting your skin.
“holy shit..” he muttered, his chest heaving as he leaned back slightly, taking in the sight of you. he reached for a nearby towel, his touch soft as he wiped your face clean, the corners of his mouth lifting into a small, grateful smile. “you okay?” he asked, his tone gentler now, his hands lingering on your skin as if reluctant to let go. you nodded, still catching your breath as jake gently cleaned you up.
jake shifted, leaning back against the headboard as he pulled you closer, his hands gripping your hips and guiding you to straddle his lap. you felt the heat of his body through the thin fabric, his hands resting on your waist, keeping you close. his thumb moved absentmindedly, drawing small, slow circles on your thigh, his eyes on you.
“you drive me crazy, you know that?”
you leaned a bit forward, your hands resting on his chest, feeling the beat of his heart beneath your fingertips. “really?” you asked, the corner of your mouth lifting.
jake hummed in agreement, his gaze dropping to your swollen belly pressed against his chest. his hand instinctively moved to rest on it, his thumb tracing slow circles over the curve. you felt your cheeks flush under his touch, but you didn’t pull away.
it wasn’t just the baby, it was you, all of you, everything he loved.
he looked at you for a moment, the corners of his mouth lifting slightly. then, he leaned in and kissed you, soft and quick, just enough to get your attention. when he pulled back, his face was inches from yours, his voice quieter, almost playful.
“can’t wait to do another one again.” he said, his lips brushing your neck as he kissed you there lightly. “let’s make it happen.”
you laughed, shaking your head. “god, you’re something else.”
he pulled you in closer, his lips brushing against your ear as he whispered, “just wait, baby. we’re doing it again.”
