Poet Unspoken

Aspiring poet / writer... Mostly poet.

[wordsaregolden22]

Last year’s butterflies and hope

Turned into this year’s blank stares,

Emotional black void, and “I hope we make it.”

[wordsaregolden22]

I don’t want someone with glue

To come along and piece back

Together the parts of me that

Have broken off here and there.

I am not that person anymore.

I want someone to come along

And see me as I am, and think

That I’m enough to build

Something beautiful with.

[wordsaregolden22]

And suddenly I realized

That I no longer

Thought of those from

The past and the hell

They put me through.

In fact, it had been

A little while.

Instead of see ghosts

Haunting storefronts,

Streets and parking lots,

I see opportunities to

Potentially make new

Memories.

I unconsciously made

Space in my mind for

You. I remember you.

Your smile, your laugh,

The sound of your voice,

The feel of your skin,

The safe feeling I get with you.

It doesn’t hurt to remember

Anymore. And I hope it stays

That way.

[wordsaregolden22]

I thought you would

Change yourself for me.

Because who I was then

Was actually worth it.

But you didn’t see that.

Instead, I have changed

So much of myself over

The years that I don’t think

I’ll ever be able to just be me again.

You’re still completely you though,

The same you were as the first time

That I met you.

[wordsaregolden22]

And here I am again,

Struggling to do basic

Human functions. I have

To remind myself that I

Need to eat, breathe,

And sleep at least a few

Hours to live. Showering

Is not an optional thing,

Unless you want to be

Disgusting.

But

It hurts to just exist.

I never understood how you

Can act like you love someone

If you are doing things you

Know will hurt them and just

Count on dumb luck to save

This thing going on between you

When they find out.

I think I’m finally done

Watching you carry on just fine

While I’m falling apart inside.

I have to draw a line somewhere

Because after all, how many times

Can a heart break before one dies?

[wordsaregolden22]

We are not the same.

I hurt myself telling the truth

And owning up to everything I have done

While you save yourself by sharing

Lie after lie, doing nothing but buying

Yourself a little more time.

It must be tiring, always having something

That you need to hide.

[wordsaregolden22]

The extremely sad truth is:

Being alive is quiet, no matter

How loudly you live. You disappear

Into the noise of everything around you.

People will forget you exist just simply

Because they know that you are in fact

Still existing somewhere, so all must be well.

Death however, is deafening no matter

How quietly you slip away. Although it may

Be ironic, it is true. People notice you no

Longer existing even though they didn’t

Care that you were in the first place. That

Is when you suddenly become important;

When it’s too late.

[wordsaregolden22]

And back then,

I thought I could

Love you enough to make

You love me. I tried.

You never loved me as

Much as I loved you

Back then. But after

So many let downs and

So much hurt, I think I

Finally love you as

Little as you have

Always loved me...

[wordsaregolden22]

I’ve made a lot of

Mistakes my dear, but you are

Hands down my favorite one

[wordsaregolden22]

Mom taught me

That floral foam

Is great for holding

Flower arrangements

Together. With that,

You have completely

Control over what goes

Where and everything

Stays exactly in its place

She wanted to do that for

a living; become a florist.

She might’ve made it if life

Wasn’t so messy and out

Of place. If only there were

Floral foam for life.

I wanted to be a writer when

I grew up. I loved notebooks,

Paper, pens, pencils, and

The feeling of being in control

Of what words were put where

As they formed sentences, paragraphs,

Pages... I loved how the lines seemed

To hold every single letter I wrote;

Everything stayed where it belonged.

If only life were like a notebook.

[wordsaregolden22]

But,

What if Heaven

Was destroyed

Ages ago and

It’s remnants

We’re hidden inside

Of special people.

Angels?

[wordsaregolden22]

Late at night or

Early in the morning,

More accurately around

3 AM, when most of the

World is asleep and the

Stars can breathe again

After lighting up the world

For hours, I swear that’s

When the night sky looks

The most beautiful and it

Truly feels like miracles

Could happen.

[wordsaregolden22]

Dear Seventeen,

You are more than: a number

On the scale, the amount of

Time you spend exercising,

The “healthy” meals on your

Plate that no one notices you

Barely eat, or the number that

Is on a tag inside or your jeans.

My dear,

You are so much more

Than the piercings that

You put in your skin, the amount

Of make-up that you spend hours

Applying, the countless pictures

That you take from different angles

Trying to find “the perfect one,” or

The number of “friends” you don’t

Really have.

Sweetie,

There will be time for jobs,

College courses, dates that you

Have never been asked on, and

To figure life out.

Dear seventeen,

No one will tell you this, but you

Are still a kid. Your life right now

Is simple and you should enjoy it

As it is. Hug you family tighter.

Love yourself. It won’t always be

Like this.

With love,

No longer seventeen.

[wordsaregolden22]

What they cannot see is

Everything they should;

Exhausted souls, rivers of tears,

Bruises and broken pieces.

Nothing everything beautiful

Was always that way.

[wordsaregolden22]

And if you happen to

Somehow stumble

Into Normal, please

Tell her how much we

All miss her. Even the

Things about her that

We thought we hated.

Tell Normal if she ever

Comes back to us we

Would truly appreciate

Her for all that she is.

Tell her that we need her;

Our lives have been a mess

Since she left.

[wordsaregolden22]

I think about the

Past a lot and

Miss it too much

For someone who

Doesn’t want to

Go back there.

[wordsaregolden22]

Outside my window,

The world is quiet

And still for what

Seems like the first

Time ever.

I count the stars and

Befriend the moon.

We have conversations

About the better times

That are yet to come.

We're going to be okay.