Work Time Quotes

I work in an office. I overhear a lot of weird stuff.

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It's not good to have autism.

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From sharts to tears.

Coworker

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“I love you, banana lotion.”

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Coworker: "12 15...." Me: "What?" C: "Today is 12/12. I don't know why I notice numbers like that. Like the other day it was 12 oh-five and this is 2015. I just notice numbers." Me: "...."

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"Some people are Facebook friends with everybody, but he's Jailbook friends with everybody."

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"(coworker) offered me one of those Swiss chocolate rolls...like Little Debbie...I don't even LIKE those. Why would she do that?!"

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Me: "Is Sharon out today?" Boss: "Nope. What's up?" Me: "I was just curious because her door is shut and no one has seen her today." Boss: "She's off. Or may be in later." Me: wtf...

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I'm terrified.

"Would you like a baked potato?" "No thanks." "I'm going to make you eat it. Shove it down your throat." 😨

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"Is that bologna on that pizza?" "I think it is Canadian bacon." "Oh, girl you know I'm not used to the finer things in life."

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Hi, all!

Hello! This is the first post to Work Time Quotes, a Tumblr (and Twitter feed) dedicated to all of the weird, nonsensical things that I hear at my workplace. It will mostly be just quotes, but context will be provided if need be. I hope you enjoy reading it! This first quote was a question posed to me a while back by a coworker: "Did we ever find out what happened to Hitler?"