Common Misconceptions For Writing Queer Characters, Dispelled by Your Friendly Neighborhood Bisexual
1.  âIt wouldnât be realistic to include more than one gay/bi/trans/etc. character, because theyâre statistically less common.âÂ
Queer people travel in packs. Â Weâre drawn to each other before weâre even out of the closet. Â
Donât ask me how this works, but flash back three years, and I was a sixteen-year-old baby bi just starting college. Â I still had a lot of introspection to do (I thought I was a lesbian even though I was pretty strongly attracted to guys, for example, because I didnât want to be associated with the stigma of bisexuality or accused of faking), I was still in the closet, and fellow queer people sounded like some sort of mythical creature that Iâd never actually encounter.
A year later, I met my first openly bisexual friend â a fellow art student, obviously â and in my excitement blurted that I was bi as well (Iâd since gotten comfortable with the label.) Â It felt euphoric to finally say it out loud, and came out to my best friend immediately afterwards. Â Surprise surprise, she herself was pan. Â
Now Iâm a senior, and almost everyone in my close friend circle is queer, including three bisexuals, two pansexuals, one lesbian, one trans boy, and one gay, plus a couple straight folks who I love in spite of their lifestyle. Â
Granted, this could be due to the fact that I spend most of my time in the art department, but the point still stands: Â queer people are drawn to one another like bees to honey.
So please, give your queer characters a posse. Â It would be a lonely world for me if I didnât get to interact with people I relate to in that way.
Moreover, recent studies show weâre not as uncommon as previously thought: Â as of 2016, less than fifty percent of people under twenty-four identify as heterosexual, and over thirty percent of adults under thirty report same-gender attraction.
http://www.out.com/news-opinion/2016/3/11/less-50-teens-identify-straight-says-new-study
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/11807740/half-young-people-heterosexual-lgbt-homosexual-yougov.html
I think itâs perfectly understandable that people are becoming more comfortable with being open about their identity as society ceases to vilify it, and I only hope the world will continue to do so.
Like, say, by including more healthy, happy queer characters in fiction, for example.
2.  âThis character canât be gay/bi/etc. because it isnât realistic for the time period.âÂ
This may come as a surprise to you, but Macklemore didnât invent queer people in 2012. Â
I know, I know, Iâm a blasphemer and a heathen. Â But the unfortunate truth of the matter is, historical erasure and the strict censorship laws of the twentieth century have created the impression that queer people are something new when we most emphatically are not.
Instead of going into the intricacies of how pervasive erasure was (and still is), Iâll list my personal favorite examples of famous people and characters you never knew were queer:Â
1. Â Richard the LionheartedÂ
(Gay and charged with sodomy during his lifetime.)Â
(Unashamedly bisexual, and arguably the founder of âgay leathersâ with his movie The Wild One.) Â Â
(Gay, convicted twice for sodomy, and ârepulsed by the notion of sex with women.â  Had affairs with several of his male students.)
(Bisexual, had an affair with his screenwriter friend William Best and occasional flings with women.)Â
(Bi or pansexual, reportedly had affairs with other famous actresses of her time, including Marilyn Monroe.)Â
7. Â Queen Christina (a 17th century Swedish Monarch)Â
(Probably transgender, nonbinary, or gender nonconforming. Â âDressed and behaved like a manâ throughout their life and had affairs with women.)
(Gay or bisexual, reportedly had affairs with many men, including Cole Porter.)
(Probably gay. Â Had affairs with men, most notably Plato.)Â
(An enthusiastically gay man who believed romantic love could only exist between two people of the male gender.)
The list goes on and on, but sufficed to say you get the picture. Â If people were educated on how many iconic and influential individuals were non-straight, do you really think homophobic attitudes would be so prevalent in modern society? Â
I personally find it doubtful. Â Moreover, the pervasive erasure of queer identities is far from over. Â I couldnât count how many times a queer character had their sexuality censored to be more palatable to general audiences: Â
How many of the queer characters in the Marvel universe, for example, have had their sexuality reflected onscreen? Â CEOs have promised that there will be a âgay character in the MCU within the next ten years,â but thatâs all weâve gotten so far. Â
And DCâs not much better: Wonder Woman was confirmed bisexual, but God forbid she be allowed to be portrayed as such on screen.Â
None of the John Constantine adaptions have reflected the unabashed bisexuality of his comic counterpart, nor does Dean Winchester, who was also inspired by an openly bisexual character a la On the Road. Â And I love Audrey Hepburn as much as anybody, but the erasure of Paulâs sexuality (he was very gay/bi in the book) can be added to Breakfast at Tiffanyâs many sins.
In other words, everything is a lot gayer than you think, and it always has been. Â So please, allow your writing to reflect it as such.
3.  âAll gay/bi characters consider their same sex attraction the bane of their existence and wish that they could change it.âÂ
Whenever a well-intentioned straight person proclaims that queer people donât choose their identities, that theyâre born the way they are, I honestly appreciate the sentiment but I canât help but cringe. Â
Straight people, en mass, are taught that being non-straight is one of the worst things you can be, so I canât help but feel that this pervasive mentality amongst allies of âthey canât help it! Â They were born that way!â is somewhat reflective of that. Â Because who would choose to be queer if they could help it, right?
I love being attracted to girls. I love watching a pretty girl put her hair up or catch a whiff of her perfume, the fluttery feeling I get in my chest when I watch them laugh or giggle, particularly at one of my jokes.  Girls are just amazing, guys.  Who couldnât help but love them?  Â
I love ogling cute boys every bit as much, of course, but thatâs not the issue here: Â my attraction to both genders is an integral part of who I am as a person. Â I love it. Â Iâm proud of it. Â I love to talk about it with my fellow non-straight friends.
I donât want to change my identity. Â I want close-minded people to change how they view my identity. Â And until they do, they can fuck right off. Â
4. Â âQueer people take their identities really seriously and would never, ever joke about them.â
My guy, my dude, bisexuality it an untapped mine of comedic gold. Â
âI go both waysâ is my answer to any question involving two or more options, and a veritable fountain of puns bubbles up inside of me every time someone uses the word âstraightâ in a sentence.  Iâm surprised no oneâs punched me in the face yet for the amount of times Iâve erupted into an impromptu performance of âGettinâ Bi.âÂ
And it isnât limited to bisexuality, either:  when one of my friends mentioned she was pan, I hi-fived her and said, âSweet!  Youâre my panpal.â  I honestly expected her to deck me right there, but fortunately her fondness for punography rivaled even my own.
The point is, we really donât take ourselves all that seriously: Â every queer person I know â virtually every single one â has used their orientation as personal comedic fodder. Â Â
If queer people seem oversensitive to you, thatâs probably because youâve only seen them react to homophobic/transphobic jokes that hurt them personally. Â The trick is to laugh with LGBT people instead of at them: Â think Holt and Kevin from Brooklyn 99, or the wonderful Thomas Sanders. Â A compilation of his vines about queer people can be found here:Â Â https://youtu.be/Yf-AIRezG2E.
Also, youâll notice that unlike homophobic jokes, these jokes are actually amusing. Â
5. Â âThey have to die, because, realism.â Â Â
Aside from the fact that, as Iâve stressed before, queer people have always existed and managed to lead successful, happy, and fulfilling lives, ârealismâ is not the reason why so many writers bury their gays.
You see, long ago in the not-so-distant past of the 20th century, the censorship laws were such that gay and bisexual people could only be portrayed in books and media if they A) repented their sins and âturned straightâ by the end or B) died. Â
Thatâs why so many gay characters die horribly and their bisexual lovers end up with a person of the opposite gender, and why so much gay fiction is still tragedy porn for straight people.
Seriously, guys. Â Itâs a really ugly trope that needs to come to an end. Â Every gay person I know realizes that being gay is hard, so please, give me a new generation of literary queer people who end up happy, successful, and safe.Â