The signs as things as first semester in college
Aries: The first week that is dedicated into luring into their traps dubbed 'clubs' and 'organizations' and them talking you into going to one of those cult like events for sororities and fraternities; you can't escape, they will find you
Taurus: The urge to back hand annoying upper class men who are offending your eardrums without even being in their stupid conversation about how dog boobs are weird
Gemini: "I WOULD LIKE TO BE FRIENDS WITH YOU, WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR" starter pack. Does not include tears or awkward conversation skills.
Cancer: Must. Find. The. People. Who. Give. Out. Free. Food. And. Money. Or. Maybe. Get. A. Rich. Upper. Classmen. To. Be. My. Sugar. Daddy/Mama.
Leo: The fuck do you guys mean you invested all this money into a theater and don't have a theater department? ! Well, student body government here I come.
Virgo: Drugs. Frat parties and so much drinking. Then freaking out finals week when the temperature drops and freezes your nipples back into studying
Libra: Shaving your armpits and legs more often then you open your $130+ psychology books
Scorpio: With black painted nails and freshly inked tattoos, all they are trying tell me is that- YOU TO USE TUMBLR, FOLLOW ME. NOW.
Sagittarius: That one hot professor who stares at you and you stare back, hoping to start something new- turns out you have dried drool in both corners of your mouth and those crust boogers in your eyes and they feel bad for you. Or think you were out partying instead of writing that 4-page-double-spaced essay over the history of the fucking United States of America
Capricorn: The pathetic excuse they call food in the dining hall that you can't even take food from. But everyone steals the fruit and sneaks out cookies to save money. Don't drink the milk unless you want an upset stomach that lasts a week
Aquarius: That one person you have sexual tension with but your not sure whether or not to engage with your first fwb in college or not. Also, this same person spilled ramen on their lap and was forced to go to the ER
Pisces: Resisting the urge to call your parents and telling them you have become a stripper and have a roommate who every time they open their bedroom door- their room smells like week old hot pockets and $1 air freshener