Neil Abram Josten

"I've been a problem for 19 years, I'm too tired to be one now."

[wxntdiealie]

wow. this blog is pretty goddamn dusty. 

But I’m back! Well sort of. I’m changing things up. This blog is going to be under construction for awhile while I make this a multimuse blog because I need to really condense what I want to do here. So I’ll be around, but also gone for a bit. 

you can reach me at discord (nxtapipedream #6336) if you want to chat!

[wxntdiealie]

w o w have you ever fallen off the face of the planet?

because I apparently did. 

I’m sorry I’m the worst friends, I’m working for 8 hours tomorrow but I promise I’ll be around...

[memestockpile]

different ways to say ‘i love you’. 

‘i’ll make you something, yeah? your favorite dish, just for you.’

‘let’s get you back to bed.’

‘shh, it was just a nightmare.’

‘you like this, don’t you? i remember you saying that.’

‘i drew up a bath for you.’

‘you need rest.’

‘you ought to be asleep.’

‘i bought two.’

‘here. you can have the rest.’

‘i thought of you when i saw this.’

‘i like your smile.’

‘you have a cute laugh.’

‘stay there. i’m coming there to get you.’

‘it’s okay, i’m here, we’re okay.’

‘be careful.’

‘look both ways.’

‘you mean so much to me.’

‘i can’t lose you.’

‘i thought i might have lost you.’

‘how to you feel about the nickname, (insert nickname)?’

‘it looks good on you.’

‘i’ll make you soup.’

‘ah-ah-ah. you’re sick. you need to stay in bed.’

‘are you okay in there?’

‘that’s it, that’s it. get it all out. shh.’

‘it’s a remedy i knew. helps with your throat.’

‘it’s a lullaby. would you like me to sing it to you? would that help you fall asleep?’

‘i’m worried about you.’

‘what do you want to watch?’

‘where would you like to go for dinner?’

‘close your eyes and hold out your hands.’

‘we’ll figure it out.’

‘oh, it’s not big deal. you’re fine.’

‘i brought you some medicine for your cold.’

‘you’re important to me.’

‘this is your favorite song, right?’

‘you’re like a son/daughter to me.’

‘good luck!’

‘you’re like a mom/dad to me.’

‘don’t say that about yourself.’

‘want to come with?’

“wow! you look really nice.’

‘goodnight, (insert term of affection).’

‘it’s okay. i couldn’t sleep anyway.’

‘you can have half.’

‘come here. let me fix it.’

‘your tie is crooked.’

‘c’mere. shh, it’s okay.’

‘i’m not going to hurt you.’

‘can i touch you?’

‘can i kiss you?’

‘can i hug you?’

‘promise.’

‘would i ever lie to you?’

‘i think you’re very beautiful/handsome.’

‘hey, good-looking.’

‘of course i care. you’re my family.’

‘one more chapter.’

‘i love you.’

[wxntdiealie]

[text:] i know i’m a horrible roommate/part of why u can’t trust men but it’s 5 am so shut the fuck up

[text] .....did you mean to send this to someone else? because I’m not even home my dude. 

[wxntdiealie]

[text:] am i dramatic yes is it justified also yes

[text] You’re not dramatic babe

[text] that gecko was 100% smiling at you and it was definitely the cutest thing I’ve seen. 

[wxntdiealie]

pinchevaquerx:

Instinct makes Jesse want to snap at the kid, tell him not to give them any more reason to hurt him than they already have. The voice in the back of his head sounds suspiciously like Gabe, and he’s pretty sure the advice is directly from the man himself. Damn, what he wouldn’t give to be able to just hand the kid over to Gabe instead of doing this himself. He was likely to mess it all up, possibly, somehow make the kid turn out even worse than he did. 

Now this reaction, he knew intimately. That was exactly how he’d been at first, too. “Alright, you don’t seem in danger of droppin’ dead on me, so we’ll skip the check up. You still want the food, though, right?” Or maybe Ana. She could probably whip the kid into shape. Or at least shoot him with a sleep dart whenever he tried to run next. 

“Questions about yer old man. Where he might be headed, who his contacts are, any plans you overheard. We needa stop him, and all of Talon, and we’ll take info anywhere we can get it.” They’d probably get a bit more personal. There’d be questions to make sure Neil wasn’t actively involved in the business himself. Jesse wasn’t very keen to ask those, and he sure wasn’t going to tell the kid about them before he was secured in a locked room.

The John Wayne wannabe was getting annoyed, Neil could sense it in the small space between them. He was expecting a fight, like most adults gave him when he refused medical attention when it was offered, but this guy didn’t start yelling, throwing things, or giving him more injuries. Huh. Weird. 

It didn’t matter anyways, Neil was running the second he got off this stupid jet...right? So it wasn’t a problem. 

At the mention of his “old man” as Mr. Wild West put it, Neil flinched. It wasn’t a reaction he enjoyed, it just happened. He hated showing that single iota of weakness. “You think he’d tell me anything? This is the fifth time he’s left me behind during a raid. He’s just pissed you guys haven’t killed me yet.” Neil slumped back in his seat “You guys are wasting your time.”

[wxntdiealie]

am i the person that is most likely going to write a Love, Simon fanfic while on this flight back to california?

tune in to find out. 

anyways i’m bored at the airport, so someone come talk to me here or on discord!

[wxntdiealie]

Just saw Love, Simon again and ITS SO BEAUTIFUL THE SECOND TIME 😍

[wxntdiealie]

anyways if you want to do things with my new simon and bram accounts (plz, I love my sons and want to do so many things with them) follow me at @abrahxmgreenfeld and @notatypicallovesong

[naragun-deactivated20161113]

I highly recommend you follow the person I reblogged this from.

[wxntdiealie]

Just saw Love, Simon again and ITS SO BEAUTIFUL THE SECOND TIME 😍

[shittyrpmemes]

* ∘ ∙ — text starters !!!

feel free 2 change pronouns & such

[text:]   you  will  machete  through  this!!  **make it

[text:]  wait you like me ?? for my personality ???

[text:]  i have to kill him. idk how to hit on him so he has to die.

[text:]  make sure no one has fun w/o me & make sure they all know it’s cause i’m not there.

[text:]  hey just wondering but are u fucking kidding me

[text:]  am i dramatic yes is it justified also yes

[text:]  words can’t describe how cute you are. numbers can tho. 3/10

[text:]  that’s a terrible idea.

[text:]  you’re a terrible idea.

[text:]  what, pray tell, the fuck

[text:]  sorry my battery’s on 96% i gtg

[text:]  do you have anything else to tell me? bc well your horoscope said that you’re keeping secrets so like idk i don’t wanna call you a liar but the stars don’t lie idk

[text:]  the only fetish i’m into is attention❜

[text:]  dogs are better than boys & that’s just a fact idc what u think❜

[text:]  we’re talking about me now. so can you please not. thanks. anyway back to me.❜

[text:]  hmm, good point, but have you ever considered: eat my ass????❜

[text:]  i need a gf who will go ufo hunting with me❜

[text:]  when donkey asks shrek what his name is, shrek pauses before he says shrek, & i’m convinced he came up with it on the spot.❜

[text:]  are you going to be a bitch your whole life?❜

[text:]  we had sex but it wasn’t that great bc i had banana bread in my car & i couldn’t stop thinking about it lmao. he was tryna be sexy & asked ‘so what do you want’ & i was like my fuckin banana bread lmao

[text:]  wym ‘fucker’ isn’t a term of endearment

[text:] i swear if i see your typing bubble before i finish i’m gonna have a fit

[text:] fuck you i do wtf i want

[text:] i know i’m a horrible roommate/part of why u can’t trust men but it’s 5 am so shut the fuck up

[text:] hey just wanted 2 let u know i’m beautiful. thank you & good night.

[jiminfilter]

“This is your night. This is your game. This is your moment. Seize it with everything you’ve got. Pull out all the stops and lay it all on the line. Fight because you don’t know how to die quietly. Win because you don’t know how to lose. This king’s ruled long enough—it’s time to tear his castle down.” - The All of the Game series, by Nora Sakavic

[wxntdiealie]

pinchevaquerx:

Trying to keep his laughter in, Jesse looks up and away, licking at his lips a little. It doesn’t end up working and he lets the chuckle out softly. “There’s always somethin’ to talk about. C’mon, don’t you know how to avoid givin’ the authorities info? You ramble on and on about unimportant shit until they get tired of hearin’ yer voice.” 

A voice that sounded suspiciously like Gabe was yelling at him in the back of his mind, telling him not to encourage the kid’s bad behaviors. That possible, maybe, somehow this kid wasn’t as bad as he’d been. Jesse took a look at all the scars covering what he could see of the kid and the flightly look in Neil’s eyes and told that voice to shut up. 

“I won’t question you until after we’ve got you checked out by a doctor. And gotten some food in ya. The mess hall is smaller than it used to be, but the food tastes better. We’ll get’ch’a patched up and fed, then the questions’ll start.” The odds of Neil believing him were pretty slim, but it was worth a shot. Anything would be worth it to not have to chase him down again, the kid was fast.

“Is it? I’ve found the stony silence makes them angry and they hit you, sure. But if you pretend you’re mute there isn’t anything they can do about it.” He didn’t know why this man wanted to help him - or why this man was dressed like a cowboy, but that was a lesser concern - but it never ended well for Neil when someone was offering him assistance. It felt like a trap. 

The idea of doctors made Neil sit up rigidly straight in his seat. “I’m fine, I don’t need a doctor.” He wouldn’t sit for one, not at all. Suddenly that plan to run seemed much more appealing than it had five minutes ago. But running meant no food, not for another two weeks at least. He’d usually leave it be, but he had pissed his father up, and got himself locked in solitary with no food for five days. He’s starving. 

“What kind of questions?” Neil asks, trying to pretend like he’s going to cooperate, that he wanted to help this hat wearing officer. He’d run the second this guy turned his back...right?

[cxmocxmmando]

obscenely domestic starter sentences

❝ Stop man-handling the ice cream! ❞ ❝ Change the channel and I’ll kill you. ❞ ❝ You actual shit, you started without me!? ❞ ❝ Since I’m up, by default I will get your _____. ❞ ❝ Did you just throw a sock ball at me!? ❞ ❝ How about this, how about you fight the rest of the cereal by yourself and I’ll courageously make pancakes for those of us who want a little warmth in our mornings. ❞ ❝ Whiskey is a breakfast staple, anyone who says otherwise is fucking lying. ❞ ❝ My underwear are now bright pink because of you, thank you very much. ❞ ❝ Can you stop kicking me? ❞ ❝ I don’t go shopping I get and retrieve. I have a narrow focus, unlike some people. ❞ ❝ Did you walk the dog? ❞ ❝ You, me, PJ’s, pizza, bed. The PJ’s are optional. ❞ ❝ Only you could make the idea of beating up already dead meat sound attractive. ❞ ❝ I can feel you staring at me, why don’t you just come in? ❞ ❝ Good news; we have internet again! ❞ ❝ I don’t want to file taxes, why don’t you be the adult? ❞ ❝ You snuggling me over an open flame is an invitation for my nipples to disappear. ❞ ❝ I know you’re scared of my mother but contemplating arson isn’t the way to fix this. ❞ ❝ I installed a stripper pole while you were gone because it made me think of you. ❞ ❝ All I was doing was helping the barista learn to spell my name properly. The song and dance should NOT have gotten you that embarrassed. ❞ ❝ How about we just never mention this again? ❞ ❝ Have you seen my earrings/necklace/rings? ❞  ❝ You are literally the child we both want/neither of us want. ❞ ❝ Did you call the doctor about that? ❞ ❝ Let me pop it, just let me pop it, nothing bad will happen, I swear! ❞ ❝ You almost left me at the gas station! ❞ ❝ Alright look! Next time you want to barbecue with the hair dryer, just make sure I’m home! ❞ ❝ I didn’t think the sink had this much water inside of it. ❞ ❝ Don’t be mad, but _____. ❞

Bonus for multi-lingual situations: ❝ Can you translate the news for me? None of this makes sense. ❞ ❝ What is the word for this? *points at ____* I keep wanting to say ‘printer’ but I feel that is wrong. ❞ ❝ Next time she calls you a ____ you just reply with _____. ❞ ❝ I’m sorry but my pronunciation must sound really bad to you. ❞ ❝ Shit! The government doesn’t have my alphabet, put this in a way I understand! ❞ ❝ Can you finger spell that for me, I’m not quite up to that level yet. ❞ ❝ That was said so horribly wrong but you sounded very cute while trying. A for effort. ❞

[pinchevaquerx]

@wxntdiealie ❤ ‘d for a starter !

Sometimes, I worry you’re too much like him.

It had been nearly ten years ago when Ana had said that to him, but Jesse remembered it clearly. Especially when he did something particularly Gabe-like… such as finding a scrawny, messed up kid and - quite literally - dragging him out of the hell hole he’d been in. The kid had given an obviously fake name, but Jesse knew how that worked. He was more than willing to use whatever name the kid preferred. 

He’d also had to chase him down and tackle the kid to stop him from slipping away in all the chaos. If he’d been up against anyone but an ex-Blackwatch agent, it probably would have worked. Unfortunately, Jesse knew all the tricks in the book, so he was going to borrow from Gabe’s now in the hopes of helping this kid out. 

“So, Neil, how old are you?” Jesse didn’t bother with a smile, but kept his posture loose. After the shit show this entire mission had turned out to be, the last thing the kid needed was another adult lying to him. So no posturing, no fake deals. But he realized the question might seem like an interrogation, so he started over.

At the moment, they were riding in an Orca back to Gibraltar. Jesse had placed himself between Neil in the door, close enough that conversation wouldn’t be awkward, but far out of reach. With his gun on him, the distance didn’t really matter, but he hoped it was enough of an olive branch that the kid got it. “Y’know, we’ve still got three more hours on this flight. It’ll go a lot faster if we can find somethin’ to talk about.”

[wxntdiealie]

Neil stared ahead of him. There was a raid. Of course there had been a raid. If his father was anything, it was consistent. Everywhere he went, he brought some sort of bad luck. And he’d always run right before. 

This time, the Butcher almost didn’t make it out, but of course his omnic security guard pulled him out at just the right moment. He missed the tussle as well as the guy with the fist - Dreadfist? Doomfist? Doomfist. - who escaped, leaving Neil and the rest of the drones to deal with it. Nathan was probably hoping one of the raiders would just kill Neil, deal with the son he never wanted. 

But, the fucker wearing a serape grabbed him so now he was sitting on a ship going to the Overwatch base. Neil was already planning his exit route the second they landed. He could run, there’s gotta be a drop zone his mother left wherever they were going - she left pockets of money everywhere they went. But he was tired. And kind of hungry. It had been a few days since he ate. There was no way he was going to tell this guy that. 

Glancing up Neil shrugs “Don’t have a lot to talk about...” and then after a second he glances down at his arm, the scar from when his mother ripped his SSC from his arm and traced the shape of it “I’m 19.”

[wxntdiealie]

  the way I feel about him is like a heartbeat                                  soft and persistent                                                                 underlying everything

two new indie Love, Simon / Simon vs the Homosapien’s Agenda blogs because I couldn’t decide who I wanted to play more. Mun is 21+. Both side blogs, follow back from wxntdiealie

[justanotherrpmemeblog]

Send “Oops” for your muse to catch mine in just a towel.