This blog will be deleted in a few days. My art blog Stroblitz, and the photoset Blog Wybored, they are side blogs so they will be saved, but I won't have access. They will be attached to some random email for a random blog, so people can still look at the old stuff I created. Syfien will be deleted. I don't want to do this, but someone I've stopped talking to obviously sees me still using this blog as an invitation to try and force themselves back into my life.
To the people who are mutuals or just follow this blog. Sorry for the drama. I didn't want to do this because airing such stuff out just isn't me, but I'm done. The main reason for me doing this is that this morning, they attached a massive fic to some fanart I did a while back. They used a different account I hadn't blocked to make sure it was seen by me.
Kinomiya. Antitezis. Whatever other blog name you will make. Leave me alone. Claiming I'm your greatest friend or whatever, and yet this is how you replied when I told you my grandfather passed away.
Claiming I'm your best friend, when really it's because I'm a fucking doormat that put up with shit. I have no spine and let you get away with so much because I didn't want to rock the boat. I didn't want to confront and cause issues.
I wasn't allowed to go to bed earlier than 2am because 'it's not fair, I have no one else to talk to/you're not working anyway/whatever else excuse made sense but not really~' And I did it. I stayed up late and ruined my mornings. Even when I had things the next day early, I'd stay up and feel like shit the next day. It was easier than trying to explain why I had to go to bed early. Easier than dealing with your passive-aggressive attitude the minute I tried to log off 'early'. Like I said. No spine in my body X)
Anytime I was away from discord and not available the whole fucking day for you was an annoyance you had to verbalize. My holidays seeing family. My date nights with my husband. Playing games I love a little too long. MY OWN FUCKING WEDDING. You complained and got all passive-aggressive with me over the fact I'd be offline for a few hours/days/etc because 'its not fair, I'm going to be so bored etc'. No. Fuck you. Why the fuck did I let you talk to me like that?? Why the fuck did I have no spine?? Made fucking excuses the whole time for you. I got married, and it was a bother to you because I wasn't here to talk about fucking Takao and Yuriy? Literally thought you were making a dumb joke at the time, but the behaviour carried on. All little things that annoyed me, but I excused them.
The dumbest thing about all of this is what essentially became the straw that broke the camel's back. You getting mad I didn't want to do a different blorbo story. That I didn't want to spend the night talking about how misogynistic Boris and Garland are, so your perfect little Takao!Female can be the victim X) A lovely story idea you came up with after we talked about a horrible game involving rape. How lovely. Just how I want my boys to be portrayed. Anyway, I'm still angry at myself for finally standing up for myself over this stupid thing and not how you spoke to me in December. But I guess it was just resentment. All the times I bit my tongue and just went along with things, and here you were, not doing the same.Giving me paragraphs of manipulation, basically, on how I can't have this boundary about my fav characters. How we talked about it before~ Hated it then too but again, no spine and went alone with it X)
The LMAO after I told you my Grandfather died should have been the nail in the coffin of this friendship, but it wasn't. I was so used to bending over backwards. Making excuses. You were going through a thing at that time. I need to be understanding. FUCK that. I was stupid, and I still get angry over myself for letting myself be treated this way. I see photos of him, and all I can think of is how you treated his passing. Couldn't even muster a "I'm so sorry." Nah. Had to spend the next 5 hours talking about yourself, and how terrible the day is. What kind of friend does that? What kind of granddaughter lets someone act like that over her grandfather's death? And you knew he was dying because I told you about it. I gave you more sympathy over your cat Winnie passing than you even fucking managed to give me over my own flesh and blood.
You don't miss me at all. You just miss the fact we vibed when it came to fandom content. Just leave me alone. I'm deleting this blog. If you know me anywhere else, lose the link.