What Lies Beneath

Xavier Blackwell. I'm 23, studying psychology, and trying to avoid any major property damage.

[xavierlupus]

midnighttigerluna‌:

❝ I’ve been calling you. Why won’t you answer your phone? ❞  @xavierlupus

“Have you?” Luna said with a frown. “I haven’t heard anything, I wonder if something is wrong with my phone.” She said as she turned the device in her hand, examining it. 

That was a relief -- he’d been worried that she was ignoring him, after their more... unconventional New Years celebration. Though he felt closer to her after it. spending the night shifted into animals isn’t the most common way to spend both New Years Eve and the full moon.

“Maybe the ringer’s off?” He suggest, before shrugging, settling down beside her. “Anyway, come get dinner with me, I’m starving and don’t want to grocery shop yet.”

[xavierlupus]

nvthawkguy‌:

Kate held her bow up, aimed at a distant target and arrow nocked. She turned to someone near her. “Okay, here’s my offer, I get a bullseye-” She smirked. “And you get me a coffee.” 

Getting to know Noh’s team was turning out to be a much more interesting experience than Xavier had counted on. He can’t help but admire them, really.

Can’t help but snort at her offer, shaking his head even as he smiles. “I’d have to be very foolish to take on that bet, wouldn’t I? But I’ll buy you a coffee anyway,” he offers, watching her with interest. He’d never gotten into archery, but he can admire the strength and skill that goes into it.

[xavierlupus]

marvelbcy‌:

There wasn’t anyone Noh would trust more when it comes to this brand new experience. “The only easy part?” He asks as his hand grabs onto their boyfriend’s. He allows himself to be led toward the rink, and will admit to being a little nervous when Xavier lets go. He tries to keep his cool, and places one foot onto the ice. He pushes off, his there arm grabbing onto his boyfriend’s arm to balance himself.

“Depends on how quickly you pick it up,” he teases, holding tightly to Noh’s hand. “You’re doing great, babe, just push off like that,” he praises, tightening his muscles to account for Noh’s extra weight. “Keep your knees bent and spread apart like that, so you can balance.” He coaches, reminding himself of his uncle, or the skating coaches they’d sometimes see on the ice growing up.

[xavierlupus]

blayzeconstantine‌:

There had been a reason Blayze kept this a secret for the last two years. Only now was it starting to burst out of the seams, as if screaming for anyone to notice him. He wants to truly be himself, and this was part of that. He couldn’t hide it forever, that much the boy knew. He was afraid of the stares, and while Blayze knows there of course will eventually be someone that’s disgusted by him, he hopes this man isn’t. 

“I think I’ve watched too many movies. If people see me as just some MONSTER they might not want me living in their town.” Blayze frowns, the worry too deep seeded in his brain. He would have to get past it eventually, but in opening up maybe that would help. “Thank you, I just want people to find out on my terms, with family at least. No one’s hurt though, except maybe my pride for having to eat like that.” He laughs at himself, and steps forward by a few steps. “Blayze.” He offers a hand out to them. “If you have questions I’ll answer ‘em.”

“I can’t talk much on the monster front,” Xavier tells him, shrugging. “Being a werewolf doesn’t give me room to judge.” How easy it is to admit, here in the woods, a blood soaked stranger-vampire with him. If only telling his friends were so easy, more of them would know by now. The thought almost makes him laugh. “So... I take it you’re not like, thousands of years old, huh?” 

Xavier takes his hand, ignoring any blood that may be on it. “Xavier, and I’m full of questions but have no idea where to start.” He admits, grinning. “So... Not to sound too Twilght here, but why not just eat animal blood? Or is it drink?? I dunno.”

[xavierlupus]

marvelbcy‌:

Noh thinks that this was a great environment. It felt welcoming, and everyone looked to be in good spirits. Which he thought was lovely to see all the laughter and smiles on everyone’s face as they look at all of the various booths that there was.

“You’re more of an expert than me then, I’ll trust you then. We can embarrass ourselves together as they say.” Noh chuckles as they watch Xavier help tug the skates on. He knew that there had to be an art to tying the laces, but he didn’t want to do it completely wrong. He was excited to try something new. He was a quick study, so it shouldn’t be all that hard, right?

“Exactly,” he agrees with a laugh, finishing Noh’s skates and moving onto his own. Once they’re laced up, he stands and reaches for Noh’s hand. “It’s gonna feel a little weird, walking on the rubber with the skates, but that’s the easy part,” he explains and assures, leading them towards the rink. He lets go to get onto the ice, pushing forward a bit, getting used to the feeling of gliding again, before turning back to Noh and reaching his hand out. “Push out like you’re running,” he stage-whispers, gentle grin as he takes Noh’s hand again.

[xavierlupus]

@marvelbcy

[Given to Noh Varr is a small, plainly wrapped box; inside is a hand made birch tree ring, carved out by Xavier]

{{Find the ring for sale here}}

[xavierlupus]

mccn-knight‌:

She squeals at his grin, clapping rapidly, positively thrilled as they roll up to the zoo parking. When she began to deserve such incredible friends, she wasn’t sure, but here she was half speechless from excitement. In truth, just a long drive was enough to excite the girl, she loved the feeling of cruising up high in Xavier’s Jeep. The idea of the zoo made her bounce with her enthusiasm.

She gives him a cheeky smile, playfully biting the air near his fingers with a giggle as he pulled her curl, hopping out of the car. She quickly makes her way next to him, slipping an arm around his elbow as they walked, her usual choice as she walked with someone she was close with, “do they have fish too? Wait– when did you even decide this?” She laughs, looking up at him, “easily the best surprise ever, you tricky man.”

Short bark of laughter as she bites at his fingers, reminding him far too much of Rascal, or other pups he’s known in his life. Sweet and silly, just as Anna was. He’s infinitely grateful that he was able to bring the Jeep with him when moving, since his Mother had also loved it. He’d spent too many summers saving up for it though, so with him it had gone, and it allows him to escape further into the trees if he needs.

Sometime soon, he’ll need to tell Anna about that side of him. The werewolf and the Moon goddess -- there’s a tragedy waiting to be written there, he thinks with a wry twist of his mouth, getting out of the car. Drops her a wink at the questions, grin spreading to take over his face. “Decided last week, looked up when they turn on the holiday lights, too. I’m especially excited for the penguins exhibit -- and yes, there are plenty of fish,” Xavier adds, enjoying the easy, casual touch they have between them.

Anna is, without a doubt, one of the easiest people to be around in his life. With his free hand he pulls out their prepurchased tickets, handing them over and getting their wrist bracelets, before leading her to the map of the zoo. “Where d’you wanna go first?” Xavier asks, scrutenizing the available exhibits. Thankfully, it’s early enough in the season that all of them are still open.

[xavierlupus]

marvelbcy‌:

Their eyes widen at all of the various booths before they stop at the ice skating rink. “On my planet we don’t do anything like this.” It was truly the reason why he decided to stay here rather than go back to Hala. He smiles when their gaze shifts to look at Xavier, taking a seat to put the skates on his feet. “Thank you for bringing me here. Have you ever done this? Will you help me get them on?” [ @xavierlupus ]

It delights Xavier that he gets to experiance so many things with Noh. The Christmas mart is gorgeous, and all the various booths have him curious and teetering on overwhelmed, but in a way that is familiar and almost comforting. Noh’s hand in his own adds a level of security, too. 

Growing up in Montana, Xavier learned to skate on frozen ponds, held up by his Mom and Uncle. He’s comfortable on skates, though he’s no figure skater or hockey player. Settling down next to Noh, he nods, smiling widely. “My pleasure entirely, baby. Yeah, I grew up skating in winter, but you’ll do wonderfully. And if you fall, I’ll make sure to fall down with you,” he teases with a wink, reaching down to help Noh tug their skates on.

[xavierlupus]

bcastbxy‌:

“well now I guess I know why you smelled weird,” gar shakes his head a little, and in her crouched position, he sees the wolf about to shake, “no no–” but too late, and he raises his arms and turns his head away as tiny bits of flesh go flying, “that’s absolutely disgusting,” the green man calls from behind his arms, “and some sorta serious health violation I’m sure– yuck!”

Once the shake is done, gar curls his lip as he picks bits of the boy off of himself, “I’m really glad I don’t do this every time I shift…” He mutters, looking at the wolf with an amused yet sassy side eye, “you really enjoyed that, didn’t you? Yeah, okay, I see you,” he chuckles, “once you shift back, you gotta tell me what exactly you are. Werewolves… Well, Stephanie Meyers never described that,” he shrugs, more to get a reaction than being any sort of serious.

Tail wagging furiously in response to Garfield’s exclamation of disgust, Xavier would love to be able to laugh, does his best approximation of it instead. Hoarse barking, some mild jumping. All the casual reactions to his other form have been calming his nerves about coming out a second time -- a bisexual werewolf, constantly coming out of his cage. And yes, he’s been doing just fine.

Growls low in his throat, narrowing his eyes at the mention of Stephanie Meyer. Werewolves don’t age around vampires his fucking ass -- horrendous bullshit, all of it. Checks his levels, and he’s close to being able to shift back, to actually answer any questions -- but not quite. So he sits instead, cocks his head slightly to the side, staring at the green man before him.

[xavierlupus]

cfakihiros‌:

Xavier is good to be so patient with him, Aki knows. He has a priority here, he needs to do this for his trials and he needs to get something useful out of it. The fact that he’s giving Aki the space to be able to deal with this, that he’s not pushing Aki to talk about it before he’s really ready to do so.. it means a lot to him. Even if he doesn’t know how to say it. “I’d.. rather it was someone I know, to be honest.” Aki admits, and he means it. He wouldn’t have even shown up if it was a stranger. “I don’t think I could hide from it if I tried. Doesn’t seem to leave me alone.” He sighs softly, looking down at his hands. He doesn’t like being scared - it’s not him, it’s not who he is.

Shaking his head, Aki glances up at his uncle - which is still a weird way to see Xavier, truth be told. “I’m lucky to get a few hours. Sleep’s - not a big deal, though. I don’t need as much sleep as most people so it doesn’t really matter. I - get through a couple of hours before I wake up from nightmares.”

Making note of the amount of sleep -- and the nightmares -- Xavier makes sure to keep his attention fully on Aki. Lets any worry or thought of his grade go, because any patients he has in the future will need his full attention and help. Aki deserves that, too, and more. “Do you remember the nightmares, when you wake up?” He asks, pen ready to make a quick note of the answer.

It’s clear, from here and now, that the diagnosis will most likely be PTSD. As if it would actually take a psychologist -- acclaimed or not -- to land on that. Knowing what Aki has isn’t going to help him, not on it’s own. He needs to talk it out, speak it, lessen it’s power and hold over him. “Do the nightmares ever seem to cross over into your waking life? Or, do you have... flashbacks, brought on by outside stimuli?”

[xavierlupus]

blayzeconstantine‌:

This wasn’t a situation Blayze was prepared for, no one has ever seen him drink before so there was GOOD reason for his worry. He may have been drinking out of a blood bag, but that doesn’t make any of it OKAY to anyone else. There was part of him aware of how sickening it must look. He was a monster in all sense of the word, but he could still be GOOD right? He believed that, but Blayze isn’t sure if the rest of the world would.

His gaze is still settled on the other who seems shocked by what they stumbled upon. “Yeah, so it was exactly what it looks like. I didn’t hurt anyone, I mean it. You can’t tell anyone, I’m not ready for everyone to know about THIS. The school doesn’t even know. Listen, I can LEAVE town … just don’t turn me in. I was just hungry.” 

Dealing with the... situation... in front of him, while also trying to process what the vampire is saying to him is a very difficult job for one brain. Accepting that vampires are real is a lot for one brain, honestly, but he’s pulling it together quickly enough. Quick enough to no longer just be caught staring, which is no way to act, Jesus Christ, his Mom taught him better than to stare at people.

“Wha -- leave town?? Why the fuck would you leave town?” Yeah, this is new for him, and well a bit intimidating, but he turns into a wolf and fucking eats deer and other animals at least once a month. Sometimes many more. He’s dating an alien, and his Dad has come back from the dead. Vampirism is... relatively harmless? At least in this case. “I won’t tell any one, dude, I swear. I just smelled the blood, I thought someone was hurt.” He’s rushing to reassure, hating that panicked look on their face.

[xavierlupus]

blayzeconstantine‌:

There’s an almost empty BLOOD BAG in his hands that the young vampire was feeding off of. Blayze wasn’t keen on doing it any other way, not wanting to hurt anyone. He escaped to the forest since he thought it would be safe out here. When the bag is empty he quickly shoves it inside of his backpack. His gaze looks up to meet with another set, and his instantly freezes. “Shit. What did you see? I can explain I swear!” [ @xavierlupus ]

There was blood dripping down his lips so he uses his sleeve to wipe it off since there was a few holes in this sweater already. Blayze doesn’t have a good excuse for this, the fangs were still visible with his worried expression. 

Finals were kicking his ass, not to mention his weekly sessions with Aki. Noh was comforting, but entering the police force is difficult, so they both had other shit to do. Rascal helped, and his other friends, but... Sometimes he just needs to be among the trees, breathing in the nighttime air. He isn’t planning on shifting tonight, too mentally exhausted to also exhaust his body, but he can feel the Wolf guiding him forward. Lets it take over, closes his eyes and just walks, moves to keep his mind occupied.

Catches the awful, familiar scent of copper bloody on the wind, snaps him back into the present. Eyes wide, nostrils flared to invesitage deeper. Human, definitely. He hurries forward, because if someone is hurt, how could he not help?

Isn’t expected what he actually finds, mouth dropping open, nothing coming out. Fucking. A fucking vampire?? Despite what he’d teased to Nat, he’d never actually met a vampire... Let alone found one looking so worried. “Uh. I saw. Uh. You drinking blood? I’m pretty sure?” He manages, wrestling control back from the Wolf, while also forcing his mouth to move.

[xavierlupus]

mccn-knight‌:

it felt good to cry with laughter, without a care in the world as she sat in the passenger seat of his old Jeep as Cotton Eye Joe finishes over his speakers. she’s pulled her knees up against the dashboard, doubled over as her sides ached with her cackles after performing a rather elaborate dance in the seat. Of course, she was doubles over when she saw the sign. she gasps, perking up in the seat, “that’s a sign for zoo,” her voice is low, and indeed she thinks she’s finally discovered the grand secret of where they were going, “Xavier, that’s a sign for a zoo!” she bounces in her seat, looking between him and the road for more signs, “are we going to a zoo?! I haven’t been since…” she thought off for a moment, “I had a picture from when I was… five? but I think I only remember thinking elephants were terrifying,” she was rambling, but she didn’t care, “Xavier are we going to a zoo?!” [ @xavierlupus ]

If he wasn’t driving -- and if he didn’t love his Jeep -- he’d also be laughing until there were tears in his eyes. But he holds it in, even if it’s killing his sides, watching Anna dance excitedly. It’s relieving, to see her carefree and laughing, and he’s especially grateful that he actually went through with this plan. For sure beats doing homework and studying for exams. Hell, even if they were just going for a drive, it’s worth it to see her laughing like that. 

He doesn’t say anything to her question, but he grins loudly, which should be answer enough. The parking lot is only half full when they turn into it, but it’s clear and unmistakeable: zoo parking. There are signs for the zoo around them, and he grins over at her as he backs into a space. “C’mon, Annie, I want to see some fuckin animals.” He teases, tugging on one of her curls before climbing out of the car.

[xavierlupus]

cfakihiros‌:

Aki has to keep reminding himself that this isn’t bad. That talking about this, finding a way to begin making peace with whatever he is now is the only way for him to even think about living his life. He can’t just.. go on like this. “Honestly?” He asks, raising an eyebrow as he looks over at Xavier. “Terrified is probably the best word for it.”

Which he knows sounds awful, and it’s not Xavier’s fault he’s so scared at the thought of talking. It’s no one’s fault, really - how do you even try and talk about something like this? How do you open yourself up to explaining the trauma that plagues you every day, how much it’s changing you the more time goes on? “It’s not you - honestly, if it were anyone else I wouldn’t have agreed. I just.. you know, I’m not good at talking about things at the best of times. And this is.. yeah. It’s a lot.”

He isn’t surprised to hear it, and he’s more grateful than he can say for the honesty. “That’s alright - really, it is. This will be hard no matter who it is, but hopefully we can make more progress than with someone completely new.” He agrees, settling into his seat more. Hoping if he seems more relaxed, Aki will relax with him, mimick his posturing, his emotions. “We can go slower, too. We can stop whenever it gets to be too much, take some small breaks.” Pauses here, trying to think of other ways to reassure. “Terror is okay. Being scared, it’s natural -- hiding or running from it feeds it more.”

“How are you sleeping, since it happened? Through the night, only for a few hours?”

[xavierlupus]

cfakihiros‌:

What exactly is he doing here? Aki has no idea. Sure, he agreed to this - he knew what it entailed, he knew it wouldn’t be easy, but at the time it seemed like a decent idea. At least, it seemed like trying to talk about it would give him some kind of opportunity to try and find a way to move on. And if he can help Xavier in the process.. well, that’s something too, right? besides, maybe it’ll be easier to talk to someone he knows he can trust than a stranger. God only knows what that would be like, trying to talk to someone he doesn’t even know about the tangled mess in his head.

So here he is, stepping awkwardly into Xavier’s office and doing his best to stay calm, even though he knows what’s to come isn’t going to be easy. “No problem.” A lie, they both know it. “Hopefully I can actually give you something to work with.” He says as he settles down on the couch, hands clasped tight in his lap as Xavier explains. “Should be fine. It’s not like my schedule is full right now.” Aki answers with a weak, empty laugh.

“Uh - right, okay.” Wherever he’d like. Wherever he’d like is back in his bed at Laura’s place, hiding under the covers because even thinking about talking through any of this seems near impossible. He’s not sure what he’s supposed to do, how he’s supposed to explain to Xavier, to anyone how he feels, but.. he told Xavier he would try. “I.. have no idea where I should start, to be honest.” He says with a weak laugh, trying - and failing - to loosen up. “I haven’t really talked to anyone yet. Every time I try it just - doesn’t work.”

It’s clear Aki is feeling a bit uncomfortable, exposed even -- Xavier makes a small note of it as he speaks, because it’s what he has to do. It helps them both, if he can double check his notes, and see how his body language changes talking about it, and helps him remember what he exactly says. Plus it’s required for the class, to have patient notes. Both of them are feeling a bit tense, on the spot -- and Xavier can’t even begin to imagine how hard this is for Aki. If he’s feeling a bit overwhelmed, the sheer choice of talking points must be hell for his nephew.

“That’s understandable, really, and more common than you’d expect. We don’t have to start with the -- with what happened. Let’s start a little simpler, instead, something less broad. How are you feeling this morning, about these sessions?” He pauses, and gives a bigger smile, chuckling a bit. “You can be completely honest, too. It won’t upset me or hurt my feelings, promise.”

[xavierlupus]

fxxkgunnar‌:

He huffed before throwing away the cup of coffee. If someone was offering to buy him another cup, Gunnar wouldn’t say no to that.  “Yeah sure. Thanks.” That was a foreign word to him but it was something he was learning that he had to use here. “There’s too many earth things that everyone wants me to try.”

“No problem, dude,” Xavier assures, shrugging. Anything to avoid those papers on Freud being so fucking wrong. “I think my partner has a similar, um, hm, issue? He enjoys most of it, though. Do you have a list?” He asks, getting back into the line, shoving his hands into his pockets.

[xavierlupus]

{ @cfakihiros } It had felt a bit strange, at first, to even think of asking Aki to do this. Sure, clinical trials were common for his year, especially with finals rapidly approaching, and they would occasionally let you pick your own patient... But asking his family -- and a recently traumatized member of said family -- felt... wrong. It came back to what they had talked about before, how talking to someone familiar, someone that felt safe, would be better for him that had helped decide. Aki could always say no, anyway. That he hadn’t was both a good sign and, in Xavier’s eyes, a slight miracle.

The knock on the door of his “office” -- and wow, was it weird to have an official office -- was expected; Xavier had heard him walking down the hall, but it freaked others out when he was immediately there to open the door. He manages a smile, ushers his nephew in. “Hey, come in, have a seat,” he greets, closing the door behind them quietly, before sitting in the chair opposite the small couch. “Thanks again for this, Aki. It’s the four sessions, once a week. That still works, right?”

“We don’t have to cover everything today, obviously -- we have the four weeks. So we can start wherever you’d like.”