having a girl blorbo is like. i need to cocoon her in blankets and let her sleep until noon. i need to cook her three square meals a day so she’s not just living off coffee and the will of god. i need to see her wrestle a pig in the mud. i need to turn her into a keychain and swing her wildly around on my backpack. i need to give her a sword and set her loose. i need to steam her like a vegetable in my rice cooker. i need to grind her into dust with a mortar and pestle and turn her into sand art and display her on my shelf. i need to give her smoochies and kisses. i need to wear her in a locket that’s discovered with my corpse thousands of years later. i need to create a new constellation in her image. i need to cover her in blood.
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