[xenomorphius69]

note to nobody because nobody cares,

really wanna put the gun in my mouth.

[xenomorphius69]

everything just keeps getting worse. no matter what. with mom on life support, i feel like i am too. i don’t know how much longer i can keep going. when i’m not with my mom at hospital, stressing and hoping, i’m literally alone. doing nothing. this life has been awful and every good thing i ever had, i fucked it up. i’m trying to do and be better, but life is just CONSTANTLY kicking my near-lifeless body.

i’m sorry. i’m so fucking sorry. i just can’t handle anymore loss. anymore stress. anymore disappointment. my symptoms are increasing, it’s only a matter of time anyways.

[xenomorphius69]

Complete honesty; if I knew life was going to get this hard, I wouldn’t have survived. Can’t find a job, have to fill out disability papers for a third fucking time, bills piling up, the love of my life hates me, despite being tired 24/7 I can’t sleep through a whole night.. I don’t know how much I can keep this shit up, it’s getting to be too much.

[elliot-amy]

The VVitch (2015) Robert Eggers

[xenomorphius69]

2 klonopin, 3 10% mojito bevies down, and like an eighth of 35% indo got me feel like not existing

[xenomorphius69]

i have literally ruined everything in my life and no matter how much i work to try and be the best person that i can be, it doesn’t make all of the self-degrading hatred and emotional pain. i want it all to end. i almost told my neurologist about the last time i was this lost. thing is, this one is worse. ten fold. i’m surprised I haven’t blown my br*ins yet, to be completely honest. i need to get out, there just isn’t an easy or fair way.

i fucked up with the most caring, funny, beautiful woman i wanted to spend the rest of my life with. i will always have to live with that. i just need to stop seeing her everyday, because honestly i fall back in love with her every time i see her no matter how fucking much i try not to. she deserves her happiness, far away from me. i’m so sorry.

someone end my life for me so i don’t fuck it up, myself. again. lol

[xenomorphius69]

back to crying everyday again. cool. my life could genuinely end tomorrow and no one outside of immediate family would even care.

when i die, anyone who tries to post about me and say that I was their friend or that we were close, is a fucking liar.

[j0celynh0rr0r]

What a beautiful day to die

[xenomorphius69]

of course i manage to fuck things up so bad right when i was beginning to think that things are going well.

i wouldn’t be kaine michael caraballo if i didn’t ruin *everything*.

[disease]

Visit Original Link

PORTISHEAD / SOUR SOUR TIMES / 1994

[spacecowboyluna]

I don’t know the right words

I don’t need the right words

I just need to bleed

[greelin]

we need fangs in your neck friday now. More than ever

[classichorrorblog]

Carrie Directed by Brian De Palma (1976)

[bellasstorm2023]

[xenomorphius69]

speaking of agonizing pain in multiple ways, time so smoke more indo at pass out so I don’t feel for awhile.

[coitus-n-carnage2]

[hate5sixofficial]

Stout 2025-01-04 Orlando Warehouse Orlando, FL