xeppeli's not safe for work blog

[xeppelinsfw]

i'm doing some Counter-Strike: Condition Zero shit to the pussy

[delmondo]

When you fuxking a girl... you think in your head what if shes faking that my fucking dicks is inside here... n what if shes just rubbing it between her legs and acting like its in there. because I can't tell.

and when u finally turn on the lights you either see her bellybutton overflowing with cum or you were actually fucking an alive, sapient pair of disembodied legs

[thisshitaintnothintomeman]

every hour on the hour im shooting hot loads on accident. zero arousal, no erection, no frills, just straight ropes for no reason.

[frawgs]

2026!!! here’s to a great balls out year !!!

[nsfwteioh]

does anyone else's nipples get hard when they hear a key change in a song

[xeppelinsfw]

[nsfwteioh]

listening and learning.

[nsfwteioh]

does anyone else's nipples get hard when they hear a key change in a song

[xeppelinsfw]

[nsfwteioh]

pussy clarity after a bush trim is insane

[xeppelinsfw]

she calling me henry potter the way my hog got warts

[xeppelinsfw]

I just burst a huge hot cum, sorry to say.

[xeppelinsfw]

Yayo jaja: American Man, widely credited as the first man to "ever jerk off his own asshole instead of dick" was killed today and went straight to heaven/hell. he was 272,625 years old and will be missed by a handful of employees at Bradford Hotmills LLC and jesusgod

[xeppelinsfw]

balls and pusy on the SAME mound

[xeppelinsfw]

fucking cool 👍

[xeppelinsfw]

Excuseme i have a doctors note here uh huh. yup. it say's here i have brainfog an account from beating off into shoes . or whatever. Hey wait a second,m your the guy from fucking RollerGames. Yeah the guy with the bald ponytail. Did anyone tell you you seound EXACTLY like kim mitchell. Guy had a set of pipes that's for sure. *snapping to get your attention* Here. Here. Here. Here. Here. Here.

[datadegroove-deactivated2026042]

stick that pussy up my ass

[delmondo]

OOGA CHAKA OOGA OOGA OOGA CHAKA OOGA OOGA I CAN'T SUCK THIS PENIS

[xeppelinsfw]

injecting sand into my urethra from the top of the shaft and pissblasting, turning my entire dick into a portable waterjet OR a dangerous weapon. so bascially if you need some FR-4 in the most fucked up shapes imaginable weeell catch me on a good day and i'll fix something up for you but i can't promise its shape or dimensions will like, be within any acceptable tolerance. are U listening to me

[delmondo]

one time my dick got stuck in the conditioner bottle

and then you could not get it off and you were too embarrassed to go to doctor/hospital so eventually your poenis grew to fit the shape of the bottle and 20 years later when they Dremel it off you have what is essentially a club shaped penis that you can drive nails in with and shit so you get hired at a construction cumpany and everyone thinks you are a novelty and put these ideas in your head about being a youube sensation and so you tell your story to millions online and then you have a catchophrase and a media empire and do reaction video and relate your every thought, as you pause the videom, to your club penis