" I'll do anything for $200"
“Just take it, then. The money, I mean.”

if i look back, i am lost
Monterey Bay Aquarium
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
cherry valley forever
YOU ARE THE REASON

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
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Xuebing Du
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Kiana Khansmith

PR's Tumblrdome
Sade Olutola
Acquired Stardust

Discoholic 🪩
Peter Solarz

JBB: An Artblog!
occasionally subtle
wallacepolsom
styofa doing anything

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@xfailepically-blog
" I'll do anything for $200"
“Just take it, then. The money, I mean.”
⁇
Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text.
[text]: out w Fang don’t wait up, fightING fr ost giants next [text]: KICKing ASS
[text:] please endeavor not to die [text:] is this something you should be doing while drunk
“until i was 25 i thought the only response to i love you was oh crap!”
“Frankly, it sort of still is, isn’t it? But like...in a good way.”
the one where chandler bing needs to chill out | ask meme
“no you didn’t get me! it’s an electric drill. if you get me, you kill me!”
‘donald duck never wore pants, but when he got out the shower he always put a towel around his waist. i mean, what’s that about??”
“they ate my last stick of um, so i killed them. do you think that was wrong?”
“wow i’m a duck i go quack quack i’m happy all the time!”
“so i can’t fire joseph, but i can sleep with his wife.”
“it’s not me, it’s my character!”
“he seduces his coworkers wives for sport and then laughs about it at the watercooler the next day.”
“no freakshow, she’s fictional!”
“TIME FOR BAYWATCH.”
“we can just stay in and cook for ourselves? *maniacal laughter*”
“take off your shirt!”
“you know those big streetsigns that say merge? i was thinking we could get one to hang over my bed. MERGE!”
“neat! i’m gonna die alone!”
“if i’m gonna be an old lonely man, i’m gonna need a thing. a hook. like that guy on the subway that eats his own face. so i figured i’ll be crazy man with a snake. you know CRAZY SNAKE MAN! i’ll get more snakes, call them my babies. kids’ll walk past my place and they will run. RUN AWAY FROM CRAZY SNAKE MAN!”
“it’s 6:30 in the morning, we’re not working out. it’s over.”
“so, it looks like this internet thing is here to stay, huh?”
“yeah don’t worry about me, i’m fine. FUNG HA!”
“if i helped we could FIND THE FASTER.”
“her ankle is what you’re watching??”
“just doing her job.”
“will you marry me? will you… marry me? hey. you marry me.”
“no you can’t have my jacket, then i’ll be cold. you thought you were gonna be cold you shoulda brought your own jacket.”
“HEY! i don’t know why i did that.”
“i was making a coconut phone with the professor.”
“my girlfriend is out there thinking things over, YOU MADE ME GIRLFRIEND THINK!”
“yes, we know there are magazines with pictures of naked women in them.”
“i think it’s great you work here, you’re gonna make a lot of money and here’s your first tip: don’t eat yellow snow.”
“being with her has been like being on a vacation..?”
what may be perceived as high maintenance, is merely attention to detail. and… generosity of spirit.”
“have you figured out what started the fire, mr fireman?”
“hold the phone, you’re not elizabeth’s dad?”
“boy did we make friends with the wrong sister.”
“i don’t think you should say that even when you are healthy.”
“come on now ya big faker!”
“yes honey, i made it myself.”
“nice camouflage, for a minute there i didn’t see you.”
“i’m sorry, we don’t have your sheep.”
“i’ve just realised i can sleep with my eyes open.”
“look i took a test and it turns out i do put my career before men.”
“i am not BLAH, i am a HOOT.”
“someone on the subway licked my neck, LICKED MY NECK!”
“DEAR GOD THIS PARACHUTE IS A KNAPSACK!”
“all right, rock paper scissors for who has to tell her to leave.”
“sometimes i hold stuff like this and pretend i’m a giant.”
“i’m glad we’re having a rehearsal dinner, i rarely get to practise my meals before i eat.”
“oh that makes me feel warm in my hollow tin chest.”
“i say more dumb things before 9am than most people say all day.”
“hi! i make jokes when i’m uncomfortable.”
“why yes, pressing my third nipple, it opens the delivery entrance to the magical land of narnia.”
“can you lose your virginity again? i feel like mine’s growing back.”
“until i was 25 i thought the only response to i love you was oh crap!”
“we swallow our feelings, even if it means we’re unhappy forever. sounds good?”
“you know, i don’t think i care.”
“SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP!”
Prostitute/Hooker AU starters
"How much?"
"I got $100, what can I get?"
"Wanna date?"
"Wanna party?"
"I have a hotel room... But it's lonely"
"I can make your dreams come true"
" hey big boy/girl, wanna have some fun?"
"Name's ______ , and I'm free tonight."
" I can make it all better"
"I can't be alone tonight."
" it's always nice to have a regular."
" need to meet me somewhere?"
"Have you got any friends, or are you the only option?
"It's gotta be nice to have someone who can't say no."
" I'll do anything for $__"
"I'm not from around here, what's a guy/girl gotta do around here for a good time?"
" you look like you need me."
" I'll take care of everything"
" you're beautiful, but I've never done this before."
"What made you do this?"
" an hour, or the night?"
Arranged Marriage Sentence Starters
“So…this is your place?”
“This is your room.”
“I’m not sleeping with you?”
“I’m not sleeping with you!”
“Well…I…uhh…I figured you wouldn’t want to sleep in the same bed just yet.”
“Do I have to change my name?”
“You don’t have to change your name.”
“I like your mom.”
“So your mom’s a real bitch.”
“I like your dad.”
“So your dad’s a real dick.”
“You live here alone?”
“Who else lives with you?”
“I’m a little nervous.”
“You don’t have to be nervous.”
“Do you know how to cook?”
“I’m your wife.”
“I’m your husband.”
“You live like a pig.”
“Uh…not you.”
“I’m glad it’s you.”
“You’re paying for the wedding.”
“I’m paying for the wedding.”
“My parents are paying for the wedding.”
“Your parents are paying for the wedding.”
“I like you.”
“I don’t like you.”
“I love you.”
“I’ll take the couch, you can have the bed.”
"You know, for a skinny kid, you smell like sex pretty often."
“Yeah, so? You looking for tips?”
⍥⍥⍥
Dominance/submission, usually leaning toward being dominated
Orgasm denial/control
Praise
“You’re not allowed to wear underwear tomorrow when you go out.”
“Kinky,” Quentin says, smirking a little.
“One of your lunch breaks?” Not that their lunch breaks almost ever involved actual eating.
“Of course.”
Ѡ
[text:] that ass is my favorite ass[text:] gonna be home soon
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“You’re right,” she replied, giggling softly and hiding her face against his chest. “That was gross. And what do you see in this idyllic future of yours?”
“Mostly just more of this. Us.” He flushed, suddenly awkward. “And, I mean, obviously, building a world that’s safe for us to live in, but, y’know.”
For every ⍥ I get, my character will reveal one of their kinks.
submitted by the-man-without-a-home.
“You’re not allowed to wear underwear tomorrow when you go out.”
“Kinky,” Quentin says, smirking a little.
Robbie smiled back. “Then again, I’ve always wanted to fuck you while you wore at least that jacket.”
“That can be arranged,” Quentin teased. “Any time you want.”
“Shut up,” she prodded Quentin’s side. “What is it you even see in me, you big loser? that’s the one question you’ve never answered.”
He smiled at her. “It’s really sappy,” he warned. “But when I look at you...it’s like I’m looking at a future that’s better than every one I’ve seen. Way better.”
“You’re not allowed to wear underwear tomorrow when you go out.”
“Kinky,” Quentin says, smirking a little.
“It’s like a present I get to unwrap and go down on without dealing with your underwear.” Robbie smirked and kissed his cheek.
Quentin laughed and turned to kiss him properly. “Sounds good to me.”
“You’re not allowed to wear underwear tomorrow when you go out.”
“Kinky,” Quentin says, smirking a little.
“Nice,” he grins. “Maybe I should invest in a suit skirt.”
“I’m more of a sucker for the subtlety of it. Nobody in your office or conference rooms knows you’re not wearing underwear and then I get to strip you when you get home.”
“Ahhh, I see. Well, I”m definitely into that, too.”
“Are you wearing my shirt?”
“Mhmm. It smells like you.”
“Then I get to walk around in one of your mutant t-shirts because it smells like that expensive cologne you like.”
“Fine with me,” Quentin murmured, grinning.