born sinners.

don't try to clean up after the red because it'll never go away. that's life.

[park-minyeon]

[xdonghae-deactivated20191121]

✖ — welcome to the new age

[ ... ] 

[xjiyeons]

it was a bit more than obvious as to why she was there. anyone (or the selective few that were still lucky enough to be alive ) who was acquainted with jiyeon on a more personal level would immediately be able to analyze the pattern. she liked purposely putting herself in the more isolated parts of town. no one needed to feel obligated to cater to her needs. it applied pure contentment down the bumpy road that was her life.

she could take care of herself given the fact that she was capable of walking through walls -- you know, the usual. 

settling down into a group screamed human interaction and she had brought herself to believe that being in the presence of lifeless corpses was a much better alternative. no one needed to fear the dead -- they were predictable and, well, dead. the living were mad, deprived, and helpless.

jiyeon pitied the world and how easily they were beginning to forget.

fingers clasped around a tall glass of something contained in a dark bottle, it would do well in accompanying her tonight, she thought while inhaling and exhaling slowly in some subdued effort to recollect her thoughts. she had just come from down the road after putting down about a dozen of what was previously a bunch of friendlies. 

blood stains had been embedded into her skin and let's not get started on the piles of rag that she almost felt ashamed to pass off as her every day clothes. jiyeon had to admit that things hadn't exactly been a walk down the park since the whole world went to shit. yet she failed to lose the barely noticeable glimmer in her eyes that made it seem like everything would be over if she continued to cling onto that last strand of hope. yeah, right.

she had been too exhausted to realize that someone else had been occupying the store which almost forced her to experience a sense of violation. her features had been overcome by a veil of darkness and an escape plan was out of her reach. 

she knew it wasn't a walker (the term which everyone seemed to be using nowadays) as soon as the two came face to face. it would have probably been the best idea to conceal her identity but to be honest -- she was done with hiding. jiyeon was tired and was unsure of whether or not she would be able to avoid the bullet that was threatening to enter her system. aside from being all suicidal teenager, maybe it was better that way. it was the easy way out. 

one look and she didn't trust him but she didn't run away. 

it had been forever since she had seen a living human.

or whatever he was. 

"if you're not going to lose the gun then make it quick."

[t-arainbw]

[xjiyeons]

truth: who is your mostest favourite ever?

i don’t play favorites but if i did — (/ pretends to ponder for the added effect before breaking out into a composed grin ) it’d have to be you with chanhee as a close second. unless someone else managed to snatch that title from me in your life. it would be great to be able to see you more than once a month though. 

[animated-minsoo]

truth or dare!

in the mood to answer some questions in character? simply reblog this prompt and then be sure to go out and send to others who have done the same. truth or dare, it’s completely up to you. be sure to ask legitimate questions and give them depth! also, don’t be too trolly with the dares, that can just get messy. have fun, guys. oh, and be sure to change the link to your inbox and send out as many as you receive.

[xdonghae-deactivated20191121]

after all this time

[xdonghae-deactivated20191121]

( ... )

[xjiyeons]

it had been too long. 

after donghae had taken what he had needed and left, days started to drag onto what felt like years, decades, even centuries. she was never able to last a minute without melting back into some pitiful state of self loathing. and the whole process came back to remind her of everything that had been so unfair.  

how he was able to face her with such contentment, she didn't know. jiyeon was already close to trembling on the spot and it made her out to be vulnerable. she could never see him in the same light despite the many times she had only dreamed for donghae to show up again. of course, that had been nothing but an innocent fantasy. something that would only show up in those children's books that read 'happily ever after'.

he was here now and just as much she completely resented him-- she wanted answers because somewhere in that messed up head of hers, she longed for the truth. or maybe she was just blind to it because it was already pretty much clear as to why he had done it.

donghae had never felt anything, never meant anything. from day one to the very last, he hadn't been real. but she had and it was simply downgrading to know that everything had been so horribly one sided. 

having him right there brought up the feelings that she'd much rather keep behind closed doors. she didn't need to give him the satisfaction.

"i should've asked you the same thing when you left," her words came out so obviously bitter, accompanied by all the mixed up emotions that she had been working so hard to store away. "but i guess it wouldn't have made much of a difference to ask. you were planning to leave from the start, weren't you?" 

and it made her even more angrier to think that nothing she had said or done would've changed his plans. 

"was this part of your plan too? showing up after all this time?"

[park-minyeon]

[xjiyeons]

what's the history between jiyeon and donghae?

[ bscly donghae was a dick and broke her heart— ] 

[sohyun-deactivated20160422]

[xdonghae-deactivated20191121]

after all this time

( ... )

[xjiyeons]

she was already out before being able to properly react to what she had saw or who she had saw. she didn't go far because she was thinking that he wouldn't come after her, that he didn't remember her. the thought wasn't actually reassuring but that was the least of her worries. she breathed heavily because she was slowly starting to realize that he had been so close. even being on opposite sides of the room was a chance she wasn't willing to take anymore. 

she took two small steps before staggering forward into a complete stop. there was a wall that she managed to use for support while allowing her shoulders to droop down into some sort of a slump. 

he wouldn't be able to recognize her. aside from the obvious being the absence of her once long brown locks -- there was something different about her as a person. jiyeon had taken on a new life after he had left and had disposed of the things that were a bit more ... nonessential. 

including any part of her that still wished he would show up again.

she should've ran. taken herself as far away as her legs could've possibly taken her. but she knew that she wouldn't be able to choose option of walking away. it had taken her too long to get used to not having him around and even up to this point, she was still adapting. 

slowly, helplessly, and desperately adapting. 

she knew it was stupid and a useless effort to turn back around in hopes that he saw her too. to actually think that he remembered and actually cared enough about her to come around just this once for all it was worth. she knew she was better off without him because he hadn't been able to prove himself any different. jiyeon knew all of this yet could only hope that the distant footsteps she heard was actually him. 

and so she turned back because if it wasn't him then she would be gone. pretend like they had never seen each other because that's probably what he wanted in the first place. she was certain that it wasn't him because donghae never did things without reason. he had already taken what he had needed from her and there was nothing. he never really needed her, he needed what she was capable of. 

but just as she came face to face with the only person that was standing in front of that exit -- it suddenly became clear that everything she once knew about lee donghae was a horribly told lie. 

five minutes ago, she had told herself that he wouldn't be standing there but this was about now and things started to scare her because he was right there. standing right in front of her.

"... donghae." 

[xm-junhyung]

time wasted and money spent

( ... )

[xjiyeons]

she had a strange habit of going about things alone. no matter how much the others tried to persuade her in learning how to cooperate. jiyeon didn't like travelling in groups because she would much rather have one less person to worry about. that's why she was on this particular mission with nothing but her own instincts to trust. 

the club is being blinded with strobe lights and it was one of those places that didn't suit her too well. aside from the occasional intake of alcohol, there was no real benefit in wading around such areas. 

they needed something from someone and that person just happened to be here. she was a bandit, a thief-- it was always take what you need and get out. 

it was like second nature to slip things out while going by unnoticed. she had adapted to the guilt of her actions and once that phase settled, there was no turning back. so in other words, all she really had to do was find the same person that had been seen on the picture that she was handed. from there, it was like a smooth ride all the way downhill. 

jiyeon found herself in front of the bartender, already placing an order. there didn't seem to be any real harm in treating herself to a reward beforehand. her eyes scanned the area while bringing up the prepared drink to her lips every now and then. 

she was growing impatient and it was starting to become evident even in her facial expressions. 

she proceeded to pull out the picture that was crumbled up in her pocket while tilting her head to the side. there was a man, probably around the same age that she was, possibly a bit older. he didn't seem to be asking for too much trouble so she decided to go along with asking him anyway.

"hey. have you seen this guy around here?" 

holding up the picture to his face, she waited. 

[sohyun-deactivated20160422]

you are my tuxedo mask, the hero who protected me..

[xdonghae-deactivated20191121]

it's a wonderful lie.

[xdonghae-deactivated20191121]

( ... )

[xjiyeons]

she knew that he couldn't stay even before her question was answered. there was just that small floating chunk of hope inside that filled her with a bunch of useless 'what ifs'. jiyeon might've been disappointed but she wasn't sad because he had said he would be here tomorrow. and anything that donghae said or did always seemed like nothing but the solid truth. 

he always did keep his promises and there didn't seem to be anything wrong with trusting him this time around just like she always did. 

she watched as he came closer and felt the way that his lips collided with her own. even up until this point, the feeling was too overwhelming in the sense that everything built up inside of her world would start crumbling down. jiyeon felt the need to ask him if he really was coming back, if there actually was going to be a tomorrow, and if he really was any different from those who had said they would come back but never did. in the end, all that managed to escape her rosy lips was a silent 'oh'. 

she couldn't ask him because she was afraid of his answer. 

donghae wasn't the kind of man to sugarcoat his words with a bunch of last minute excuses-- he was honest, so brutally honest. 

there was something being handed to her and specific instructions to report to a restaurant in inju around two, no, three p.m. he didn't exactly give her time to respond by the way he spoke softly against her skin, almost sending chills down her entire body. 

she gripped the piece of paper in her hand while nodding in confirmation. he probably needed something important because he never went about without a reason. she didn't want to ask why because the whole question and answer process was a waste of time. 

all she knew and needed to know was that she'd be seeing him again and this wouldn't be the last time.

"okay-- i'll miss you too." 

[xjiyeons]

— plan b

[xmchunji]

{` he raises both hands in the air in mock surrender, biting back an amused grin induced by her comment } whoa there, princess. {` he eventually fails to hide the smile and its previous containment only results to freeing a short fit of laughter } kidding. and if he turns up again, punch him. that should do the trick. {` his features take on an expression of equal distaste, the thought of the kid returning even after his (rather light) threat poking at his protective instincts } ow. {` rubs a hand over the arm she’d punched, feigning hurt } see, you go around punching me instead of him! {` laughter follows his own complaint and he pauses to turn around and reclaim his spot beside her, resuming their walk side by side }  tch. {` kicks at the pebbles on the ground, mumbling nearly unintelligible things that may or may not have to do with not needing byunghun to take care of him thank you very much } i take care of byunghun. of course. {` finds himself needing to suppress another smile } anytime. {` he’s highly amused at the way she doesn’t refer to the boy as a person, although that isn’t the sole reason for his quiet snicker } nah, i like your height. you’ll be too scary if you’re tall — but i still think that violence is the answer for that kid. {` shrugs, absolutely convinced that his… advice is the best bet. he instantly lights up at the offer, turning to her with a smile } you know i won’t say no to that. 

[xjiyeons]

he'd probably come back even if i did punch him. that's how bad things are right now. (/ in other words, she didn't find pleasure in getting her hands dirty for such trivial matters. the boy was more or less not worth any of her time and chunji had just made dealing with him a lot more easier ) you deserved that punch-- stupid. (/ no matter how long they managed to stay separated and out of sight, they were always bringing themselves back to point a. throwing punches and kicks at each other without even being consciously aware of it ) i'm slowly but surely catching up. so be careful, i might just end up growing tall enough to match your eye level. eh, if he wasn't smart enough to get the idea the flipping fourth time around then maybe violence has to be the only answer. (/ there's a loose smile hanging off of her lips at this point while taking the initiative to loop her arm around his ) i know but even if you did, it would've been a win win situation for me anyways. pick something over twelve bucks and i'll kick you. (/ there was a total of twenty seven dollars stashed somewhere in the depths of her pocket. and chunji knew better than to exceed that twelve dollar limit ) there's a really good noodle shop somewhere around here. not sure exactly where it is but the night is still young -- as long as we don't get lost or anything. 

[brandinator]

131006 Dream Concert: T-ara - Number 9 Jiyeon Focus by Jingdot

[larmoyante]

And that’s the thing about people who mean everything they say. They think everyone else does too.

Khaled Hosseini, The Kite Runner (via larmoyante)

[ext-eautiful]