no turning back

Multimuse/verse/ship. WRP, JRP & KRP Warning: NSFW

[xludens]

New character arrival 

 The name's Ezra. His appearance is based on Troy Baker/Delsin Rowe from the game Infamous Second Son. He's 24 years old, unemployed and a delinquent with artistic eye for spray paintings around the town. More details to be added soon as I keep developing his background story and info. Stay tuned.

[xludens]

jyheffct‌:

A few days had passed since Yonghwa had met this ‘mysterious’ Sho. And honestly, he had been on his mind quite a lot ever since. Not in the 'oh, I have a crush’ kind of way, but more in the 'I wonder about his life’ kind of way. He wondered what made it so difficult for Sho to truly be himself; because in Yonghwa’s mind, there was absolutely no doubt that Sho was in denial about his sexuality. Perhaps he wasn’t necessarily gay, but the interest in men was definitely there. His questioning and slip-ups had made that more than obvious. And it was that strong and vehement denial that had Yonghwa wondering.

However, between his work on the base and working out, Yonghwa managed to keep himself from having Sho a little too much on his mind. Still, he was definitely looking forward to future meetings, and hopefully learning a bit more about that guy. Because he had a feeling there was a lot more to be discovered.

For tonight, though, his thoughts were solely on his performance. He got the chance to play maybe once or twice every two months, so he definitely cherished those nights. Music, above all, was his one true passion, despite it being the total opposite of his occupation. And it was something he was good at - incredibly good at. Tonight, of course, was no different. So, here he was. On that small stage at the edge of the bar, that usually hosted drag shows, or similar things. Being totally in his element, Yonghwa focused on nothing else, but was he was doing. The people watching were of little interest to him, and he barely paid attention to them, despite looking up at them from time to time. His mind was mostly busy with the music and the emotions connected to it.

Except for when he looked up at some point, and discovered a familiar face among the people watching him. For some reason, it immediately stood out and he couldn’t help, but grin a little. Not only because Sho was watching him, but because of the expression he was wearing. Obviously sober this time around, Yonghwa quite enjoyed seeing him smile and even sway along to his music.

Once his performance was over, he stored away his guitar and then hopped off the elevated stage. With the other people mostly having dispersed already, it was easy for him to walk right up to Sho. “You’re back, I see.” He carefully set his guitar case down next to him, and rested his hand on the very top of it. “Lucky. Didn’t think you’d manage to catch one of my performances this soon. Did you like it?”

Once the last notes of the final song faded the idol gave his appreciative applause with a bright smile, his eyes never leaving the other as he approached. “That was awesome,” he complimented Yonghwa genuinely and kept smiling. “I had a hunch that you have a talent but you exceeded my expectations! You must have been doing this for a long time, am I correct?” He interviewed the soldier in a curious manner as the rest of the bar’s residents had returned to their own world.

“I consider myself lucky indeed. How lucky that I just so happened to have a free slot in my schedules tonight. I would have missed out and would have regretted it without a doubt,” he kept on throwing the compliments Yonghwa’s way and then chuckled as he seemed slightly embarrassed for some reason. “Well .. mister artist. Could I buy you a drink of your choice? I bet your throat’s pretty dry after that performance. I’ll gladly return the favor after your kindness the other night,” he offered and started to lead the other towards the bar.

He thought to himself how Yonghwa reminded him of an encounter he had years back during a location filming for News Zero. A Korean soldier who had a dream of becoming a singer, who seemed passionate about said dream. He couldn’t help but to wonder how that guy was doing and whether he was still guarding the border. Realizing how he’d spaced out momentarily he gave an apologetic smile to the other. “So. What’s it going to be, mister artist?” He kept going with the silly nickname.

[xludens]

jyheffct‌:

Honestly, Yonghwa wasn’t exactly the most experienced person out there - be it relationships, or things that came along with it - since his work kind of prohibited it. However, in his time since he had come out to himself, he had met a few guys like Sho. Some of those guys he had hit on, and they had turned him down in some pretty cruel ways; mostly because they were angry at themselves, rather than him. Or so he explained it to himself, anyway. 

In the end, it didn’t matter how much Sho denied it. His constant tripping over his own words gave away far more than he intended to. Was he strictly gay? Most likely not. But was there a possibility he was into guys, regardless of how repressed those thoughts were? Definitely. And for a moment Yonghwa started to wonder if he had been the same way before he had admitted it to himself. Watching that struggle now was incredibly painful and he just wanted to grab Sho by the shoulders, shake him and tell him to just admit it. But obviously things weren't that easy, nor was it his place to do so. 

So, instead, Yonghwa just smiled and waved his hand dismissively. “You’re good. Don’t worry about it. That’s what alcohol does. Mess with your brain and all. MAkes you do and say things you wouldn’t in a sober state, right?” Like the truth of what you want, for example. Keeping that thought to himself, though, Yonghwa raised his glass as well and just nodded. “Glad I could save your night with a decent enough conversation.” Grinning a little, he emptied his glass and then slid off of his chair. “Tell you what.. I’m here a couple of nights a week. Now and then they let me perform a little set, too. So if you ever need someone to talk to, how about you come back and find me? Talking to you is certainly better than being shot down all night long.”

He agreed in silence and slid the beer aside. Enough was enough. Instead of giving in to the temptation of resting his head against the counter to take a nap he turned his attention to the other male once more with a slight smile, eyes half shut. “I’ll make sure to bump into you more often whenever my schedules allow it of course. I would like that very much,” there was no hesitation whatsoever. He couldn’t help it, he did feel comfortable around this guy. And he seemed forgiving when it came to the idol making a drunk fool out of himself. Without even realizing he was grinning a little when only a moment earlier he was still feeling like he was ready to sink beneath the floor due to embarrassment. “Next time I’ll be more careful with the booze too. I swear I can be a sensible guy too I’m not always an idiot like this who stumbles with his words,” he tried to assure the other with an apologetic expression. “Stumbling would be bad when it comes to work. It’s important to speak clearly or you will get scolded. That’s how it is for me,” he revealed as he continued to ramble and then glanced at the soldier. 

Something about the other’s gentle aura made him feel strange yet it wasn’t in a negative way. “Uh .. in any case, it was nice to meet you. I’ll make sure to watch you perform in the near future,” he got up from his seat and only then the reality of his drunk state became the most obvious as he nearly stumbled and automatically found support from the other with his hand on the soldier’s shoulder to prevent himself from making a fool out of himself by falling down like an idiot right in front of the other. He cleared his throat. “I should find my way to the toilet. You know how beer is,” he gave the other’s shoulder a pat and wandered past him. “Have a great night! Thanks for everything!” He waved at the soldier while doing his best to find the men’s room which he somehow managed to do.

A couple of days passed with concerts coming and going and the idol’s unnatural behavior becoming a topic of concern with the other Arashi members. A day came with barely anything in the idol’s schedule, he decided to go to his usual place to spend the night. He was surprised when he could hear music as soon as he walked in, which sounded more live than usual. He followed the sound of singing, finding himself mesmerized before he even saw who it was on the small stage who’d caught the attention of the rest of the bar. He froze when he saw the familiar face and stood there watching the performance in secret awe. When the soldier had mentioned that he did a gig or two from time to time he had to admit he didn’t expect him to sound like this, nor have the charisma which he couldn’t take his eyes off of. He watched and listened and even smiled as he found himself swaying along.

[jeniekim-archive]

rp is using big words in a para, pausing, opening a new tab, and googling said word because even though you know the big word, you don’t wanna look like a fucking idiot.

[xludens]

kxzya‌:

[ // verse: gen ] Their tour this far was very successful, no doubt. Their 20th anniversary was supposed to be perfect after all. For the sake of their fans, but most importantly for the sake of the five of them. Mostly that’s what they celebrated after all, to celebrate their bond, the 20 years they were able to work together, their friendship and love for their job, their hardships and their success, everything. Kazu wasn’t the type to judge little mishaps on stage, he left that up to their perfectionist band mate Jun. But he couldn’t help but notice Sho being a bit off on today’s performance. Nothing major yet something he immediately took notice of. Their fans probably didn’t, but working with someone for so long, it was natural to notice these kind of things. Something was off with his friend today. 

His suspicion only grew bigger when he got back from his shower and after he had changed into his private clothing and found Sho chatting to himself. At first he thought he caught him in a phone call, but he was by himself and didn’t talk to his phone at all. The rest of the group wasn’t there either. Aiba was still taking time in the shower, Riida, as always, already sort of weaseled past them and was probably on his way home. Jun to no surprise was with the staff somewhere talking through issue with the stage and whatnot, Kazu didn’t know all too much about that. So Sho definitely was talking to himself. Usually the idol would also make his way home as quick as possible, but this time his games had to wait. For the sake of catching his band mate and make sure he was alright. For once he had his priorities straight and was almost proud of himself when he caught Sho before he could leave, which seemed to be his plan. “Going home super early today?”, he asked in a somewhat teasing tone to catch the others attention before he could leave. “That’s new, I thought you’d stick around a little longer..there’s still food coming and it’s a bit eerie you are leaving before having some.”, he chuckled and approached his friend to stand in front of him “Seriously though, are you alright? There’s something on your mind, isn’t there? You know you can talk to me, right?”, he sounded uncharacteristically serious as he said these words, looking at the other with a soft expression. 

Once he got caught he tried to laugh it off like he usually would when Nino teased him. However it didn’t last long once the inevitable guilt struck him and for once he avoided straight eye contact with his band mate, rare behavior since it was always Nino he felt the most comfortable with. “Believe it or not I was planning to catch some early sleep tonight. Going straight home and then straight to bed. I need to clear my mind to prevent today’s mistakes from repeating,” he admitted out loud and seemed apologetic, secretly cursing himself for causing trouble to the rest of the group on stage. Compared to failing during variety programs, it was different to fail during a concert. They were there to entertain thousands of fans who’d paid for the ticket and looked forward to seeing Arashi giving their best possible performance. With these kind of thoughts bashing him internally the idol had lowered his head, hesitating when the other seemed concerned.

“You know me too well after all. I guess there is something but it’s confusing and I feel like it’ll be difficult to talk about,” his voice had become barely audible as if he was worried that someone else could hear him. First he double checked that they were alone before he continued. “Actually. I met someone at the bar last night. Nothing happened! It’s not like that at all, we just had a chat and the gu.. person .. seemed nice and h.. they were easy to talk to,” he was stuttering as he desperately hid the gender of the person to avoid seeming suspicious. Well, he wasn’t exactly succeeding in that plan. “We parted ways and promised to hang out together soon again for another chat and they invited me to watch their gig, they’re an artist apparently. I was thinking of attending their gig out of curiosity. Somehow they seem like they’d be an amazing singer. In any case .. I guess I got really keen on this person, platonically obviously, since ever since that night I keep thinking about our talk. Which is strange because it distracted me even during our concert which has never happened to me before. Messing up like that just because of a new friend I made. What the hell is wrong with me?” He rambled on and as soon as he realized how ridiculous he was sounding he cracked up at himself, he went to take a seat and sighed deeply. “Has anything like this ever happened to you or am I a unique idiot right now?” His voice almost had a sulking tone, somewhat childish, as he sat back with a look of someone who’d sold his soul. “I told you it’s confusing..”

[xludens]

Ayano felt horrible for sneaking behind the doctor’s back. Taking the opportunity to enter his office while he was busy with an emergency operation. But there was something that had changed in his behavior which gave her the strange gut feeling, something that threatened to confirm what she’d been told. How he reacted when he heard that there were police officers at the hospital, the relief when she told him they were there to interview someone about a car accident which led to casualties. Something was off. She didn’t want to believe it, that he would be hiding a secret even from her. She apologized to the doctor quietly by herself as she rummaged through the drawers of his desk while daring to sit on his chair. This was wrong, it would be her turn to receive a scolding which she knew she deserved. But she knew she couldn’t get caught and had to do her part, this was for the sake of the doc. Searching nervously through every drawer, she didn’t find anything unusual nor concerning. Until she tried to open the lowest drawer which was locked. Huh. The key was gone obviously, she hesitated to try to search for it when the door opened and gave her a startle. She stood up quickly and failed to form words as the doctor was staring at her in a bewildered manner.

“What are you doing?” He questioned her, standing in the doorway while she struggled to think of an excuse. She was about to speak when the doc was faster than her. “I was looking for you everywhere. The surgery went smoothly and I was planning to ask you to celebrate with me with a cup of coffee,” it appeared that the doc was oblivious to her search mission. She sighed in relief and walked up to the doc just to lightly punch his arm. 

“That’s cute but I’ve told you your smooth tricks won’t work on me,” she confused him on purpose, knowing well he didn’t mean it in a lewd way. The doc didn’t know how to react at first until a mischievous grin appeared.

“And I’ve told you you’re not my type in the first place so get over yourself,” he shot back at her with his best tough guy impersonation while she glared at him. He laughed at her expression and gave her shoulder a pat. “Let’s go get that coffee while we still have time,” he was still a gentleman despite their bickering ways and held the door open for the nurse who snorted and left the office, hiding her guilty thoughts as she accompanied the doc to the cafeteria.

[xludens]

Closed starter for @kxzya

The aftermath of the concert had started to die out with the green room becoming a calmer surrounding. One of the idols was sitting on the couch in his own world, fresh from the showers and changed into his normal clothes. Abnormally quiet and reflecting. Few wrong steps here and there, accidentally adding his own lyrics to a couple of songs, he didn’t dare to look but he was sure he was gaining judging glances from MatsuJun especially. Of course during the MC Aiba playfully pointed out his mishaps, trying to turn it into a skit to make Sho feel better. But this time he couldn’t help feeling guilty. There was a reason for him spacing out as badly as he did and that reason wouldn’t stop bothering him nor confusing him. He sighed in frustration and ruffled his own hair, frowning as he sat back and shut his eyes. There it was again. The image of the guy and the smile .. Why did that image keep returning to haunt him?! He’d only met him once. They did have a nice conversation and he felt surprisingly comfortable around such stranger. But for him to appear in his mind relentlessly and even distracting him, this wasn’t normal when it came to his friends. 

“Will you get out of my head? This isn’t funny,” he was muttering under his breath by himself and groaned in frustration, not realizing how suspicious he was probably appearing at that very moment. “I’m not like that. I’m definitely not like that,” he was working hard to convince himself and feed his denial which he didn’t yet realize he was going through. “Of course I’m not,” he laughed slightly by himself and shook his head, amused by himself. “You’re ridiculous right now. It’s tiredness, you need to sleep more. You also need to stop talking with yourself out loud what are you doing .. “ he sat up more straight and picked up his phone, in an absent minded manner checking the screen. He should head back home and fix his lack of sleep issue. So he got up, getting ready to leave to clear his mind. But he stopped in his tracks with a look of surprise.

[xludens]

kxzya‌:

‘Look how you ended up.’ the fuck was that supposed to mean? “Eh? Quit judging me! Not all of us have the brains to go to college and become doctors!”, Kazu immediately complained in a sulky tone. “And that ain’t about me anyway.. geez.. I tell you he’s good for it. Aren’t you a troublemaker yourself? Just better at faking it and have people believe you’re a stand-up citizen.”, he sounded sarcastic and a little bitter as he huffed his words. “But alright, ‘s dope that you’re up to meet him. Bet you’ll deffo like him 'cos he makes a good first impression, I immediately like the dude when I met him.. uh, I mean as a kid that was..”, the freeter bit his lip because he almost said something stupid that could give him away.  He changed to topic fast to not give the Doc a chance to really think deep into his words “I didn’t tell him much at all. I know how secretive ‘ya being. Just told him you’re a wholeass private person who don’t seem like the type to do illegal business“ , he reassured his Senpai quick. At least that wasn’t a lie. Except the fact that he also might have given away the fact that he was a Doctor to J, on accident. But he didn’t feel the need to tell him that for now.

As subtle as his friend tried to be about Kazuya already taking up too much of his time, he noticed his glance at his watch, causing the young male to get up. "Alright alright, gonna bounce already. Let ya do your work.. savin lives and stuff”, he snickered and raised his hand “Thank’s for the free health care. Promise, will try not to take advantage of it that soon again.” Just as he finished his sentence a nurse entered the room. Probably impatient and checking what took them so long. It was the same nurse he had met here before when he broke his arm, the one who took care of his wasted ass at this time. Maybe she remembered him too because she didn’t seem particularly pleased about seeing him, Kazu however felt lucky because he had to admit the nurse was very pretty. His Senpai sure was lucky working with beautiful women like that all day. “Already done here.” the male announced to her before the nurse could open her mouth and added with a wink “But I’m sure I’ll be around again. So, no need to miss me too much.”, he didn’t give her a chance to react (he’d very likely just get an irritated reaction anyway like often at his lame and out of place flirting attempts) before walking past her and out of the door.   

He let the freeter rant without commenting on it and simply sighed as a response. Sure the other male was right about his accusations but the doctor wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction. He wasn’t planning to apologize for his facade either, it was working out great for him. Once the topic changed he turned his attention back to his old friend. Huh. This guy had a surprisingly good memory, being able to remember his first impression towards someone when the two were still kids. How intriguing and strange. For now he let it slide. “Well done. My background nor my profession, they are none of his business. You can give yourself a pat on the back,” he grinned.

“Really, don’t mention it. I won’t be doing such favors forever so don’t get used to it,” he said bluntly when the freeter was getting ready to leave. He sat up more straight when the nurse stepped in to put on his good and charming doctor role. But once the freeter started the random flirting show he couldn’t help the amused smile. What an idiot, yet he still managed to crack Satoru up. He had to admit his old friend was entertaining. Of course the nurse did look irritated once Kazuya left the room and once she gave her bemused look at Satoru, the doctor wore a fake expression of disappointment. “Please forgive him. That kid has no manners whatsoever. You can call in the next patient,” and so she did as told instantly, leaving the doctor alone for a short moment with a rare look of concern. Suddenly he was unable to shake off the unnerved feeling.

[xludens]

jyheffct‌:

There were situations, and times ,Yonghwa could be oblivious, or ignorant to certain things. And his - at least when he was off the job - dorky behavior could easily trick people into thinking he wasn’t smart and sharp. However, impressions like that could be deceiving and Yonghwa was really everything, but. In fact, picking up on certain cues and behaviours was rather easy for him. And Sho? He was damn near reeking of denial. He tried to play it off by implying he was talking about someone else, but it was rather clear he was talking about himself. ‘ Someone who hasn’t come out yet nor admitted it.‘ Clearly, he was talking about himself. Even if not consciously. Having been at that point himself, Yonghwa felt bad for him, but it was hardly his place to say anything about it. If Sho had any repressed feelings, it was up to him to figure it all out. 

“It’s definitely tough, without a doubt. But I think.. Once you’ve admitted it to yourself, it’s an incredibly freeing feeling. Finally allowing yourself to be who you are is indescribable. I mean.. It’s scary, definitely. Especially whenever you confide in someone who’s important to you and you don’t know how they react, but.. If they if they end up supporting you.. There’s absolutely nothing better in this world. And some people will actually surprise you. I found support in places I wouldn’t have expected it.” Nodding his head, he smiled a little to himself at some of the memories, before focusing back on Sho. He immediately noticed the lack of eye contact, but ignored it. 

Instead, he leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms in front of his chest, thinking about his answer before actually giving it. “I’ve had a few attempted relationships, though all of them were rather short-lived, I hate to admit. I essentially live in my place of work, so keeping something up for extended periods of time is rather difficult, and most guys lack the patience for all that. Which is understandable. It’s a pain in the ass, but there isn’t much I can do about it. At least not at this point in time.” Sighing softly, Yonghwa shrugged his shoulders and then leaned forward again, resting his elbow on the bar. “There have been a few flings here and there, but I’ve learned it’s not really for me. I just don’t find much enjoyment in the one night stand stuff. I’m a bit too old-fashioned for that, I guess. Which.. Makes it rather difficult, really. But hey, nothing will ever happen if I don’t at least try, right?” 

There were many things running through his mind he was unable to say out loud, which was probably visible on his face as he was staring at nothing with a frown, holding his beer absentmindedly. One thing confused him. Why was he so curious about this specific topic? He’s never had experience with anyone of the same gender, he’s never even thought about it before this conversation. Maybe it was the effect of the alcohol. That’s what it had to be. His mind would clear up once he was sober and he’d look back at this night in amusement. He chuckled by himself until he realized he’d been spacing out and quickly looked at the other with an apologetic expression, bowing his head slightly. “My apologies. My mind wondered somewhere far away. That was rude of me,” he admits with a grimace.

“I have to say. This is the first time I’ve been able to sit down with another guy for a casual conversation at this bar. Usually others leave me be, there have been few cases where they’ve attempted to hit on me. But I’m not into that kind of a lifestyle. You know .. one night stands. As you mentioned, too. Nor have I been with a guy before in the first place. I mean .. not that I’ve even thought about it,” he quickly corrected himself and nearly seemed panicky, chuckling a little and drinking from the beer. What was up with him? “Not that there’s anything wrong with a guy being with another guy. I promise I’m not against any of that. It would be silly of me to visit a place like this if I was against all of this,” he was rambling once again. “If someone is confident enough to fight the taboo then that’s good for them and I envy them. I .. would envy them, if I was also like that .. Jesus what am I saying? I must be confusing and irritating right now,” he laughed at himself and shut his eyes, lowering his head. He felt the buzz caused by the drinks. “I’m so sorry. I promise I’ve been listening to everything you’ve been saying. Even with the current messy brain of mine,” he muttered this as his words had started to slur and lazily opened his eyes.

“What was my point again? I lost it somewhere .. Ah yes. I’m grateful for the chat. You seem like a nice guy and intelligent too. I appreciate that I really do. Cheers,” he raised his beer at the other man. “Let’s get along from now on too,” he smiled brightly and took another long swig from the beer. The glass was almost empty by now. 

[xludens]

kxzya‌:

“Yes dad, I won’t kill myself with painkillers.”, Kazu rolled his eyes, sounding a bit like a cranky teenager who got into trouble for being irresponsible. Although the doctor was justified in his concerns. “Hey, I would never do that”, he immediately went into defense, which was basically a lie he told with a straight face. Since he had already searched and found a guy and basically hired him for the job as well, all without the others knowledge about it. And boy, the way he found the other guy sure wasn’t the most safe one either. .

 “Eh? Tomorrow, you sure?”, Kazuya was surprised to have gotten agreement from the doctor to meet this person this fast. He was expecting there to be more trust-exercises before his Senpai would want to meet J face to face. But he took the paper from it to read the location. He knew this place, it was a bar he had been in before. “Uh, I can sure I can organize that, he will definitely show up.”, he quickly confirmed, flicking the paper in his hand and feeling really successful that he got the other to agree as quick. But his confidence started to sway a bit at his friends next question. But he should be fine, he had a solid backstory. He just couldn’t stumble now and had to remember it all correctly. “Ah, he’s good for it, promise. I know the guy since foreeeever. Our mom’s went to the same college and we already hung out as kids, you know, getting in trouble together and all.. We met again back in Japan recently.”, he started to wonder if that was too much detail, because a common way to detect lies was over-detailed storytelling, at least that’s what he learned from watching one of the many true crime shows he liked to binge on slow weekends. So he stopped himself from saying more and instead added “So yeah, he’s definitely trustworthy. Since we go way back.” The young man felt almost bad for lying straight at the doctors face. But he was already in that deep, so might as well continue with it. Prayers were already going out that his Senpai would never EVER find out he was lying, or he might as well start to plan his funeral. But there was no time for these worries now, better push these aside like most his worries and consequences of his often times moronic actions. “I should probably come along tomorrow then too, no?”

He looked back at Kazuya as if arranging a meeting on such short notice was something completely normal. For him it was. He grinned in a satisfied manner and gave a nod. “Good. I trust you to take care of that.”

Once the freeter started to ramble about the guy he claimed to be his old friend, the doc listened with a more skeptic mindset and squinted as he secretly tried to read Kazuya while he was speaking. He tapped his fingers against the arm rest of his office chair and sat in silence for a while after the other was done explaining. He pursed his lips. “Trustworthy, huh. I’ll be the judge of that. You and me go way back, too, and look how you ended up. You said you used to get in trouble together with this friend of yours. Who knows, he might still own the troublemaker habit. No matter how well you think you know someone, you have to be cautious and remember that people can change for worse. But I’ll give him a chance. Ah .. how much did you tell him about me? I hope you didn’t go into details. The lesser he knows about the real me, the better. And I’d prefer to keep it that way to minimize the risk,” he checked the time from his watch. He’d have to chase Kazuya out soon.

[xludens]

discobarsama‌:

“Yes, let’s head down to the cellar,” The bartender takes a big gulp of his own beer before heading off and gesturing for the customer with the interesting request to follow.

“I hope you found the Friday Night disco party enjoyable,” he says, attempting to make some small talk to lighten up the serious atmosphere. That, or he’s just a nervous rambler type.

They walk through the kitchen behind the bar and down a long spiral staircase right to a corridor that resembles the interior of a medieval castle. Yuuto hardly ever brings anyone down here. Hell, he hasn’t even shown Kirie to the dark basement of the bar. Mostly because of the dark secrets hidden down here …

“Just a little further.” Yuuto takes a lantern and lights it before continuing to the cellar. “Watch your step” he warns, walking around the puddles of murky water and uneven ground before arriving at the door. “Here we are” the bartender unlocks and pushes the large heavy door open, revealing a large empty space that somewhat resembles a dungeon. Not that the customer needs to know that the room actually was, and still is, a dungeon.

He watched in amusement as the bartender downed a huge portion of the beer in one gulp. It almost appeared as if this guy was nervous. This time he kept the teasing comments to himself as he got up from his seat, feeling tipsy but doing his best to keep himself together. He couldn’t help the smug grin at the bartender’s next comment. “I sure did enjoy it,” certain flashbacks ran through his mind. “I’ll make sure to come again.”

He followed right behind the bartender with his hands casually in the pockets of his pants, even as they descend the spiral stairs. The corridor reminded him of one of the adult movies he’d seen recently and he was grinning by himself, the bartender’s warning going to deaf ears which caused the doctor to step right into the puddle. He groaned in irritation as he shook his soaked shoe, he cursed under his breath. “This is grand..” He sighed and followed the bartender, finding himself in a large somewhat chilly place. He was secretly impressed.

“This place has potential. You could open a side business of your own here,” the doctor hinted with the grin and nudged the bartender’s side. 

[xludens]

kxzya‌:

Kazuya only half-assed listened to whatever the doctor told him about caring for his wrist, only listening up again at the mention of work. “Eh? Are you for real now? I got a good gig this week, working on a set that pays well.. I really need the money!”, he whined annoyed as though it would be his senpai’s fault that he was supposed to rest. “Great.. and my landlord is on my ass already for being behind in paying rent.”, he muttered quietly under his breath, then looked at his bandaged wrist and turned his arm, grimacing a bit when it still hurt despite the pressure of the bandage making it a little better. But his expression changed into a smile when he received the painkillers. “Thanks Doc. Promise I won’t fool around and take too many or mix them with alcohol or any funny business like that..”, he barely could fool himself with these words. 

“Uh.. actually. You got a few more minutes? I was wondering about something..”, he eventually changed topic and didn’t even wait an answer before proceeding “Uh, I was thinkin’ about getting us a second guy to help with the trade. Ya’know.. so I got someone to have my back if things get fucked again.” admittedly he was a bit embarrassed to be a coward after just one bad experience. Especially to show this site to his old friend. But he was actually for once worried about the dangers of the job, which he really wanted to do properly but at the same time pushed his anxiety to the max.  “Being alone out there is scary. If I got at least another guy in town to peddle the drugs I might feel safer.. Less people would fuck with me if they knew I ain’t out there alone is all I’m saying” 

The doctor was conflicted at the mention of the promising gig. Kazuya’s current state was without a doubt troublesome. He frowned as he gathered the remaining medical equipment to return them to their places, at the same time he listened to his old friend and sneered. “I’m serious. You better not take the pills lightly. You can find your high elsewhere less risky for your well being,” he told Kazuya not only as his doctor but his friend too. He turned with his chair to face the patient properly once he requested few extra minutes of his time. Satoru checked his wrist watch and sighed. He expected it to be related to the side business so he gave in this time. “Alright. I can be flexible, but you better make it quick. My schedule is packed for the day and the next patient’s waiting,” he sat back on his chair and listened to what the freeter had to say in a patient and curious manner.

“Hmm. I see your point,” he said after a slight pause. “But you cannot go and hire people behind my back. Not without me meeting said person face to face. I need to know that I can trust them 100%. It is true that the work would get more efficient and risk free with more people. But I cannot give you a permission before you introduce me to them,” he turned with his chair to open one of the drawers and ripped a piece of paper from a notebook, writing an address on it. “Here. Tell him to meet me at this location tomorrow evening. I will be free from 8 pm until midnight. And since you are disabled for a couple of days, perhaps they can take care of the gig for you if they are ready. I won’t promise anything until I’ve properly met them though and gotten to know them,” he was speaking in a lowered voice, giving the piece of paper to Kazuya. “I just want to know. How did you meet them?”

[xludens]

“Why won’t you co operate?”

The doctor muttered under his breath during yet another battle with a rogue blind that refused to be in sync with the rest no matter how he twisted the tilt wand. His struggle got interrupted by soft laughter, he turned around just to see the head nurse standing in the doorway and observing the doctor in amusement with her arms folded. 

“What ever happened to you calling a professional to fix the window problem for you? I’ve caught you like this day after day and as funny as it is you should stop being so stubborn and finally do something about that problem of yours,” she dared to scold the doctor while smiling kindly with her head tilted. He snorted and tried to pick up his pride as he returned to his seat by his desk, turning with the office chair to properly face his work space, gathering the papers into one clean bunch and back into the file. 

“You have the bad habit of telling me what to do lately,” he shot back at the nurse. “My advice to you is to tone it down and remember your position,” his stern attitude took the nurse by surprise and her smile faded. The doctor was acting strangely cold even towards her, when she was used to him playing along with her playful remarks. She bowed her head.

“Of course, Doctor Izuhara. Forgive my rude attitude,” she apologized in a soft and regretful voice while he nodded at her, satisfied with this for now. “Your next patient is waiting, doctor,” she told him with another bow of her head and left the room without another word. Satoru then dug out the file of the next patient to double check it when the name caught his attention. Kagaya. The name was exactly the same. The age, too. He shrugged it off as a mere coincidence when the door opened and he stood up from his seat to greet his patient just for him to freeze with widening eyes and a dumbfounded look.

All he could do was act normal and professional. “Kagaya-san. Do have a seat,” but before he could even finish the sentence the silent man with his threatening aura had sat down on his own with his stare piercing through the doctor who cleared his throat and took a seat by his desk. “Kagaya-san, is there a problem?” Satoru brought up his initial concern, cursing Kazuya internally in case this surprise visit was caused by a screw up of his. But the older man gave his somewhat unsettling smile in return and sat back casually. 

“Look at you. Wearing the white jacket, sitting behind a desk looking important. Surely your old man would have been proud,” there was a mocking undertone which the doctor did his best to ignore. None of this was part of their deal, Kagaya appearing at his work place to taunt him. The doctor chuckled shortly with a feeling of growing discomfort. 

“If you’re here to discuss business with all due respect this is not the right place for it,” the doctor protested in a hushed voice. The older man cackled which grew into a sinister sounding laughter that probably echoed outside the office as well. The doctor’s ego shrunk within split seconds and he was rendered speechless due to the concerning reaction of his secret boss.

“I will decide the right place and the right time. I’ve heard unfortunate rumors about our business not doing as well recently, especially when it comes to your part,” the smirk quickly faded from Kagaya’s face and he got up from his seat to loom over the doctor who averted eye contact with the other. “I’m sure that you remember our previous discussion. I was generous enough to give you a second chance after that brat you hired tried to run off with our money. I know you remember what I told you. Our business will not be hindered again, no matter what it takes. Whoever the low life is you have hired currently, he better show us some impressive results without letting us down. It would be a shame to see the doc lose his carefully built reputation,” the older man was now standing behind Satoru and startled the doctor by placing a firm hand on his shoulder and squeezing. The touch was far from an assuring one and sent chills down the doctor’s spine instead. 

“I will make sure that he will do his job properly no matter what,” his voice nearly cracked and he hated himself for it. Whatever small pieces were still left of his ego had disappeared into the thin air, swallowed by the threatening aura of his secret boss.

“Good doctor. That is all I ask from you,” he pat Satoru’s shoulder and laughed, stepping away to let the doc breathe more freely. “Just to make sure I’ll send a couple of my people from time to time to check up on you and your little sidekick.Then. I’ll leave you to it. Have a good day,” he told Satoru with his mocking tone. With that the older figure was gone after his short visit, for now, and left the doctor to pick up the missing pieces of his shattered ego. 

[xludens]

jyheffct‌:

Sho’s further explanation into why it was impossible for him to date, and the consequences of doing so, certainly had him intrigued. There was no doubt that his curiosity had been piqued, however, he felt that asking further questions would probably change their current flow of conversation. It was obvious Sho felt the need to talk about it, but as vaguely as possible, without actually giving too much away. “Well.. Sometimes it’s easier to open up to someone you don’t know. Someone who has no reason, or intention of judging you, you know?” Shrugging his shoulders, Yonghwa smiled a little and then focused on his bottle for a moment. “I know you’re not looking for me to help you, or tell you what to do, but.. Work and people around you can only fulfill your life so much. Is it really fair to have to abandon something as important as love for your work? Unless you think you can perfectly happy and content without it, of course.” 

Nodding his head, he then picked up the bottle and emptied it. Pushing it towards the barkeeper, he didn’t answer Sho immediately. Apart from the other obviously trying to change the subject, it almost sounded as if he wasn’t necessarily interested in his answers per se. Those questions weren’t really questions a man who was sure of his own sexuality asked another; they sounded more like questions one would ask when about to come out, or at least playing with the idea. And that body language.. The obvious curiosity and nervousness.. Or, maybe he was just reading too much into it? He did have quite a bit to drink already after all, and the other’s rather mysterious aura was just making his imagination run wild with possibilities. “For quite some time now. About.. five years or something, maybe? It was quite a process getting to that point, really. As I wouldn’t say I’m strictly gay. I’ve had girlfriends and all, and I don’t mind them. So getting myself to admit it was the most difficult step of it all, I think. Especially with all the preconceptions all around me that I felt pressured into having myself.” Shaking his head, Yonghwa rolled his eyes at both himself, and the ridiculousness of it all. “But yeah, I have. I have a few close friends whom I’ve told. Only people I trust, of course. And my family knows as well. Luckily, they’ve been quite understanding about it.”

He nodded along with the other’s story and felt a strange sting in his chest. Was this guilt or something else? He frowned at his secret confusion and lowered his head while still listening to the rest of the story. He held the beer bottle in a secure grip. “That’s nice. Having people close to you who won’t judge you. I imagine it makes the situation easier despite the pressure you experience elsewhere. It’s a lot scarier to be alone with such thoughts,” his voice had become more quiet while he tapped his fingers against the bottle. He then laughed a little and side eyed Yonghwa. “That’s how I imagine it would be at least. For someone who isn’t open about this topic yet. Someone who hasn’t come out yet nor admitted it. That must be tough I can only imagine,” he repeated himself and shut himself up by taking another swig from his beer.

Something about this stranger’s presence was comforting to the extent of the idol feeling bad for being vague when it came to himself. But if the man found out that he was an idol, how would he react from then on? Sho wrecked his brain with such thoughts and sighed in frustration.He decided to try to get to know the guy better instead of torturing himself.

“You mentioned girlfriends but have you ever had a boyfriend before? Something serious or a fling,” from then on while he continued to interview the other male he avoided direct eye contact.

[xludens]

kxzya‌:

“That’s bullshit..”, he muttered, yet seemed to have calmed down again. The Doc’s words were better, albeit not very helpful. But if anything, it was good to hear words that didn’t seem to blame or judge him for the mistakes he made. “Guess.. I gotta figure out the spots I should avoid for now” he admitted eventually. Maybe it had been sort of his own fault for getting cocky and already visiting the shadiest places to bring the drugs on the man instead of starting small. The patting on the shoulder and his Senpai’s smile sealing the deal; It was time to quit this silly argument. As always it only took that little to have them fight, and just as little for them to be back to talking as if nothing ever happened. Kazuya glances at the knife in his hand, then put it away into his pocket before sitting down across from the other, holding out his wrist. “It ain’t broken this time.. still hurts like all hell. Can’t really bend it like usual..”, he mumbled and suddenly sounded a bit like a moping child. “Maybe ya ca give me also some good painkillers, you know, so I can sleep tonight without pain”, the young man added quietly as he watched the other. Hoping it wasn’t too obvious he just hoped for strong painkillers that would dope him up enough to have some sort of legal high. Although he had stepped away from illegal drugs ever since he was back in Japan, he did like to get high every now and then on things that weren’t technically illegal. 

The doctor carefully examined the swollen and bruised area and hummed in a thoughtful tone. “No, it’s not broken luckily. But you will need to take it easy for the next couple of days while keeping the wrist elevated and supported,” he explained to the other in a calm voice and began to wrap the bandage around the wrist for first aid support. “Applying ice against the injury also helps the recovery. If you have a frozen vegetable bag at home that’s more than enough. Just wrap it in a small towel before holding it against the wrist. And make sure to avoid heat. No hot baths nor showers for you,” he continued to advice his old friend and patient while wrapping the bandage. 

“Most importantly you need to rest and avoid lifting anything heavy. In other words, it’s for the best if you take a short vacation from your work,” he finished taking care of the injury and moved with his office chair closer to his desk where he opened the lower drawer and pulled out a small bottle. moving his chair back to Kazuya. “These will help knock you out and let you sleep without much trouble. But they are strong so I recommend not taking more than one pill per night,” with this he gave his old friend a stern look. “I trust you to have at least some common sense and be careful with the drug. If I see you at the hospital because of an overdose I swear I will kick your ass,” he gave the bottle to Kazuya and also a flyer with instructions on how to treat a sprain at home.

“If you have any questions you have my number. Try to stay out of trouble, for now. As challenging as it may be.”

[xludens]

jyheffct‌:

Yonghwa was listening patiently, and in silence. The other’s words kind of made sense, but at the same time not really. It was hard to properly make sense of it without knowing the specifics. However, it didn’t really feel appropriate to ask, and he had no intention of invading the other’s privacy, especially given that Yonghwa didn’t even know him. It just seemed like Sho didn’t have anyone to talk to, at the very least not about this. So, given that he had nothing better to do anyway, who was he to cut him short? Might as well just listen. 

“Impossible is nothing,” Yonghwa then finally said, while sitting up a little and telling the bartender to bring one more beer. “I get what you mean, though. I mean.. Kind of, at the very least. I know what it’s like when you’re not allowed to be yourself, let alone date who you want. While in my line of duty it’s not strictly forbidden by policy, dating another man is certainly frowned upon. And I’d quickly fall from grace if anyone knew I was here.” Sighing quietly, he shrugged his shoulders and then pushed the beer bottle towards Sho, once the barkeeper set it down in front of him. 

“But..” Trying to change the current, rather heavy, atmosphere surrounding them  Yonghwa smiled and instead lifted up his bottle. “Just because it’s difficult, doesn’t mean it’s impossible. If your date thought this was a poor choice of location, screw your date. If your date is unable to understand your reasoning, and isn’t happy to just be able to spend time with you, it wasn’t a date worth wasting time on anyway. That just means there’s something better still waiting for you out there.”

He laughed at this but his eyes told a different story. It was probably the fault of the alcohol in his system but this stranger’s words managed to touch him. Yet he tried to put up his usual defensive walls, even after pouring his honest feelings on the other’s shoulders. “It’s complicated, my situation. Similar to yours with the strictly forbidden policy but for different reasons. If I get caught it’ll affect not only me but my colleagues as well and everyone working with us, and everyone we’re working for,” he kept up with the vague explanations and took the first swig from the beer bottle. Much better. “So. I should probably step back for now and concentrate on work. Handling things the adult way, or at least the agency’s idea of the adult way. I’m telling a lot to someone I just met,” he realized and cracked up, placing the bottle on the counter. 

He turned his attention back to the other male more cautiously, it was time to change the topic and draw the attention away from himself. “You mentioned dating another man and its difficulties. For how long have you known you’re into the same gender? If it isn’t too personal of a question. Have you told anyone close to you about it?” He interviewed his company with genuine curiosity while his body language gave away his nervous aura. This wasn’t a topic he was used to discussing.

[xludens]

kxzya‌:

Kazuya wasn’t quite sure how he found himself to lose his temper this way. But it was a thing that only really ever happened when he was with his old friend. The two of them always had this sort of odd relationship of love and hate that caused them to stick together while simultaneously beat each others ass at every little thing. This time, the Freeter might have gone a bit overboard. The alcohol he’d already consumed before coming here was an excuse, but maybe not a good enough one. Stress was another. He had a bad day “at the office”,was screwed over by a bunch of kids he tried to sell some Xanax to. These assholes beat his ass before they took the drugs without paying money for it. When he visited the hospital and told the Doc everything, he hoped for some consulting and words of advice, plus maybe some free health care for his sprained wrist that happened in the incident. Instead he got a lot of scolding and felt looked down on. Granted, he only just started his job and already lost them money, but it was not fair! His Senpai’s attitude was really just the tip of the iceberg after already having hell of a shitty day, and that caused Kazu eventually to jump out of his skin.

“The hell you helping by shitting on me for something that was out of my control! I told you, there were five of them, and I was alone! All I get back is being judged by the “good Doctor” my ass. You’re a fucking asshole!” Kazu hissed and furrowed his brows angrily when the other’s hand was around his wrist. The knife in his hand, it was one he collected after one of the kids from earlier accidentally dropped it after beating his ass, he didn’t actually plan to hurt the Doc with it. Just use it to show how serious he was. “Tsk”, he eventually lowered said weapon and retracted the blade of the pocket knife before pushing the handle against the other males chest as if offering him to take the knife from him. “By the way, that’s the knife one of those kids dropped. They could have killed me. So the hell with your “do your job properly” if you cant guarantee my safety.” he kept angrily murmuring with a glare. 

The odor of alcohol was nearly distracting and the doctor did his best to get at least some distance between the two even in his current trapped position by pressing the back of his head against the wall behind him. His face was difficult to read as he stared back at his old friend, calmly listening to everything he had to say, barely flinching at the noisy accusations. Without breaking eye contact he snatches the pocket knife but instead of taking it away from his old friend he takes the other’s good hand and places the pocket knife into his grip. 

“There is only so much I can do for you once you’re out there doing your job. I can’t follow you everywhere you go to guarantee your safety. That part is up to you and you alone. Maybe try to avoid the shadiest part of the city until you are ready,” he pat Kazuya’s shoulder with a sympathetic smile and passed him to go take a seat, adjusting the collar of his white jacket. “Let’s have a look at that wrist then. Make haste, there are other patients in the queue,” he told the other as if their tension never happened and prepared everything he needed to treat the injured wrist.